words in movies
Phoebe: Not great, but we can work on it at lunch. Okay, I can be at your apartment in two hours.
[Scene: Rosss Building, they are approaching the apartment of the woman who died. Ross knocks on the door and a woman answers it.]
Monica: I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeans and I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comes back I will find it and show you that stain!
Eric: No wait! Theres only a problem when I look at you. (Sits down on the couch.) Oh I got it! I got it. (Puts his hands to his eyes.)
Joey: (entering) Hey Ross! Listen, do you want to go see that new Imax movie on tide pools?
Joey: To tape the game? You do this every time Ross, youre not gonna be on TV!
Monica: Oh. (Holds on to it.) (To herself) Youre not gettin it.
(Brenda pulls a chair to the counter and uses it to get up on the counter in order to clean the top of the cabinets. Monica sneaks over, bends over, and tries to see the stain. That doesnt work so she sticks her head between Brendas legs. Suddenly Brenda changes her stance and traps Monicas head between her legs.)
Brenda: Whats going on?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Brenda is shaking out the rugs on the balcony as Monica pouts in the living room.]
Monica: Fine. (Brenda comes in to use the bathroom and adjusts her pink bra strap on the way.) Shes wearing my bra!
Monica: Did you not hear where my head was? Come on! Come on were a team! Were in this together!
Monica: Do this for me! Come on, I catch you looking at womans breasts all the time!
Monica: Yes! Absolutely. Okay? Look, youll know its mine because on the right cup, the lacey part, theres a very noticeable rip.
[Scene: Erics Apartment, hes resting on the bed as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Hey! (Jumps on the bed with him.) Can we pick up where we left off?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Brenda is wiping the coffee table and Chandler is trying to look at her bra and leans over on the coffee table to get a good look.]
Brenda: Okay. (Goes over and fluffs up the pillows on the couch.
Brenda: I think I know whats going on here.
[Scene: The Hallway, Monica is sitting on the step as Rachel returns.]
Rachel: All right, I took them. But I figured it would be okay because you got a big ink stain on the crotch.
Joey: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh . That-that-thats really just to show where the baby would go. Yknow why dont I hold on to him so that theres no confusion? (Takes him back, sets him on the chair, and apologizes to him.)
Joey: I know! I found it on the street.
Joey: Not a problem. And listen, hey! Since you're gonna be here for a while, why don'tI was thinking we uh, put your name on the answering machine.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh, hi Wendy! (Listens) Yeah, eight o'clock. (Listens) What did we say? Ten dollars an hour?... (Listens) OK, great. (Listens) All right, I'll see you then. Bye. (hangs up)
CHANDLER: You couldn't have told me about this on the phone?
Rachel: Okay, I'm not just waitressing. I'm.. I, um... I write the specials on the specials board, and, uh... and I, uh... I take the uh dead flowers out of the vase... Oh, and, um, sometimes Artelle lets me put the little chocolate blobbies on the cookies.
[Time lapse, Ross and Rachel are talking, Joey is on the couch, and Monica and Phoebe are out of the room.]
[Scene: Barry's Office, the post-coital Barry and Rachel are recovering on the chair.]
[A monkey jumps on the desk and hands the guy a beer. He opens the beer and is suddenly on the beach, in a hammock, with beautiful women all around.]
(Theyre all staring at him, with big, huge smiles on their faces.)
Chandler: Varrrrrroom! Hey! Watch it lady! Varrrrrrrrrrom! (makes a screeching sound as he pretends to stomp on the brakes.) Hey-hey good lookin! (honks the beds little horn on the steering wheel.) Varrrrrrrrroom. (notices Rachel and stops) All right, Ill leave. My beds so boring.
Rachel: Come on! I am here to take care of you! What do you need? Anything.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting on the couch, eating candy. It is raining out. Ross climbs up the fire escape and is knocking on the window.]
Joey: (answering the door.) Hey, how did you do that?! Come on in. (He brings them inside.)
[cut back to Joey on the beach towel]
Rachel: Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?
[Phoebe gets up and goes into Rachels old room, a smile on her face.]
Amy: This might be my one chance to have a baby Rachel. I mean, you know that I have been so busy focusing on my carrer.
Mike: One more thing... There... might be a picture of Precious on my coffee table.
Ross: Monica, let's go. Come on now people, woman in labor.
Joey: All right, come on look, Ross can take care of himself! Its not like hes Chandler!
Pete: Oh, it's good news. No, it's definitely good news. Hold on a second, I have another call. (clicks his remote) (to his other call) Hey, how's it going?
Phoebe: I dunno, well he got over the "We were on a break" thing really quickly.
ROSS: Ahh, oh that's OK, I mean, he's probably got, you know, parties to go to and stuff. But, ya know, he's moved on. Hey, that, that's the way it goes right.
Joey: Rachel... let's be clear on this, ok? I do not love Hugsy. I like him a normal amount...
Rachel: Ohh, I'm gonna be on the news!
Phoebe: Come on, Mom, Ill take you home.
Monica: Oh, theres banana on it.
RACH: Oh, look at me, look at me. Oh, I'm on a date with a really great guy, all I can think about is Ross and his cat and his... Julie. I just want to get over him. gosh, why can't I do that?
PHOEBE: (imitating Rachel) "Oh, I have to get my number back.� Oh my God.� He's gone."� (smiles) Dead on.
PHOE: [comes back to couch, with cake] Sooo, what's goin' on, huh?
Chandler: (disgusted) Oh come on! (To Phoebe) Are you listening to this?
(Chandler opens the door and Monica sneaks up on it. They go inside.)
Credits [Scene: Central Perk. Russ enters. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting on the couch.]
CHANDLER: Well, I relied on a carefully regimented program of denial and, and wetting the bed.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Rob are sitting on the couch.]
Phoebe: Uh, it's a piece of paper and it says, "Ross" on it.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey are there, Joey is on the phone.]
Joey: You know what it is? It's a nice place but I gotta see I don't know if I see myself living here. Oh, oh, oh, let me see... (Joey sits down on the couch, mimes opening a can and puts his hand down his pants) Yeah, I could see it.
Chandler: Look, I thought about it too, and I'm sorry. I think we should spend all of the money on the wedding.
Monica: Well, I�ll tell you what we�re gonna do: We are already late for Phoebe�s birthday dinner, so you point out put out that cigarette, we�re gonna put this fight on hold and go have sex.
Receptionist: (holds up her handshe is on the phone) It says to call this number if you're not completely satisfied with this candy bar. Well, I'm not completely satisfied.
Ross: Laugh it up, but the jokes on you. Because we dont need to get divorced, okay? We were just gonna get an annulment.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Phoebe: Rachel? Oh, good. Hey, by the way, did you just get on the plane?
[Scene: A restaurant. Joey is on his date with Phoebe’s friend, Sarah. They are sitting opposite each other on a table for two. Their waiter approaches with two plates.]
(She throws a water balloon at him and hits him on the head and hits him again at the waist with another one.)
Ross: Thanks guys! (They both sit down on either side of him.) I really appreciate this, yknow, but you dont have to rub my butt.
(Ross stares at her. Thinks about it. Puts cards on table, face down.)
(We the guys knock on the door upstairs, and the guy answering it.)
PHOEBE: OK, I smell smoke. Maybe that's 'cause someone's pants are on fire.
Monica: (entering from bedroom) Okay, Ill be back in just a minute. Oh, Phoebe Im sorry that I left lipstick marks on the phone.
Phoebe: What? (the guys keep laughing.) What? You guys, what is going on? You not like Robert? (the guys keep laughing.) Why are you laughing?!
Phoebe: No, its not! We were just goofing around and I dared him to try them on.
Rachel: Oh, come on now, dont keep me waiting. Get those clothes off! But, I would keep that helmet on because youre in for a rough ride! (He backs into the door.)
Mrs. Geller: Not that old crow, my mother. (They stop and she kisses Monica on the cheek.) Congratulations darling.
Mr. Tribbiani: You're gonna keep an eye on us?
ROSS: (entering from Rachel's bedroom) Come on out, honey! I'm telling you look good! (turns around, and under his breath, to the rest of the guys) Tell her she looks good, tell her she looks good.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is reading and there is knock on the door which she answers.]
Ross: (on machine) "Hi Rach, are you there? It's me, pick up. Rachel. Rach!"
Chandler: Hi, Nina. Come on in.
(A commercial for sunglasses comes on.)
Chandler: Joey got meat sauce on the banister again! (He goes into the bathroom to wash his hands.)
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, he talked to her, but she got on the plane anyway.
Ross: I do-I do not have a boyfriend. Theres a guy in one of my classes who-who has a crush on me.
Joey: Whoa! Is this porn? What did I do? I mustve hit something on the remote.
Joey: Come on you guys, come on please-please just give her another chance, huh? Shell come around I promise.
Monica: YES! (Chandler gets an "oh no!" look on his face)
[Cut to Rosss second wedding reception, Joey has just told him the band is ready with Rachel looking on.]
Chandler: I dont know. (He picks the chick up and turns it over, trying to determine the sex of the chick, and blows on it.) I cant tell, what ever it was went back in too quickly.
Ross: And that's why, no matter what mommy says, we really were on a break. (baby talk) Yes we were! Yes we were! (picks Emma up) Come here gorgeous. (puts her on his knees and talks to her) Oh! Look at you! You are the cutest little baby ever! You're just a... a little bitty baby, you know that? But you've got... (in a softer voice) You've got big beautiful eyes... Yes you do... and a... and a big round belly. (emphasises the B's) Big baby butt! I like big butts. (raps) I like big butts and I cannot lie / you other brothers can't deny / when a girl walks in with an itty, bitty, waist / and a round thing in your face you get...(Emma laughs) Oh my God, Emma... you're laughing! Oh my God, you've never done that before, have you? You never done that before... Daddy made you laugh, huh? Well, daddy and Sir Mix Alot... What? What? You... you wanna hear some more? Uhm...(raps) My anaconda don't want none / unless you got buns hon... (Emma laughs again and Ross looks worried) I'm a terrible father!
Man: Oh, let me guess some idiot on a cell phone wasnt paying attention?
LITTLE BULLY: Look, here's what we'll do. We'll put all keys and watches in the hat over there. Alright. [they all put their keys and watches in the hat and put it on a mail box] Alright, c'mon man, let's do this.
Rachel: No-no! Big bear! Big bear outside! I think I-Iwould youactually, would you go check on that?
Rachel: Oh (happy) oh no just stopped to throw up a little bit. (Emma starts crying again.) Oh come on, what am I gonna do, its been hours and it wont stop crying.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is on the phone, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the kitchen.]
(Monica closes the door, Chandler knocks, and Monica opens it to reveal Chandler on his knees.)
Chandler: Oh come on man! At least let me finish this last one.
Joey: Okay, what if the puppy said, "Help me Chandler. All the other puppies pick on me."
(There is a knock on the door, Phoebe answers it, its Mr. Heckles)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are still out on the balcony.]
Chandler: (answering phone) Hello. Hi, Janice! Can you hold on for a second? Okay. (to Monica and Rachel) Okay, what do I do?
Monica: (thinks about it) All right, but if-if he lights someone else on fire he is out of there!
Monica: Y'know what? Y'know when I said that I want you to deal with this relationship stuff all on your own? Well, you're not ready for that.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is on the phone and Phoebe is watching him.]
Joey: Come on who? Who do you like? Tell me. You're not getting away that easy. Who do you like, who?
Monica: Come on! (The girls all run out and Joey holds up Chandler by smiling.)
Phoebe: Yeah! Sure! Yep! (Gets up) Oh, y'know what? If I heard a shot right now, I'd throw my body on you.
Ross: I can't believe Rachel just moved on and didn't say anything to me
Chandler: (laughs, but then moves to Phoebe) And don't get me started on the way that people from Tulsa talk.
Joey: Come on! Admit it! That was the best nap you ever had!
Chandler: All right, we havent had sex yet. Okay, whats the big deal? Yknow? This is special, and I want our love to grow until we move on to the next level.
Phoebe: (singing, drunk) My sticky shoes, my sticky-sticky shoes, why do you stick on me, ba-a-by! Thanks for the lights honey.
Chandler: Oh come on you big faker!
Ross: Hey! Hey! Come on! You can! I know you can do this! Lets go!
Charlie: (to Rachel) So, you know what, I really like those jackets with the shoulder pads on them. Where do you think those would be?
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, is Sidney there? (Listens) Oh, this is? (To the gang) Sidney's a woman.
Ross: Yes, that's what I have. It's not on the board.
(He kisses her on the cheek and heads to Central Perk.)
Chandler: Why dont you go up on stage. Ill get a picture of you doing the speech.
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment: Phoebe, Monica and Mike sitting on the couch]
Tag: A year. On and off. I kinda thought we'd end up together. I don't anymore.