words in movies
[Scene: Rosss bedroom; Ross and Emily are making out. Ross as a new feature.]
Ross: Oh no. Dont, dont, dont start packing. Come on! (She puts some clothes into her bag, and Ross throws them out.)
Phoebe: Nuh-uh! Theyre maternity pants. They even came with a list of baby names. (Pulls out a sheet of paper which lists whos been naughty and whos been nice.) See, these names are good, and these names are bad. (Finally, she figures it out.) Ohh.
Ross: Look guys, when Im with her its-its-its like she brings this-this-this great side out of me. I mean I-I-I love her, yknow?
Phoebe: Yeah! Here! (She grabs a deck out of her purse) Oh no, these are the trick deck. Okay. Here yes. Okay.
Phoebe: I dont know. Ooh! Ooh! Look it! (She fans out the trick deck.) Ah-ha!
Ross: Come here, come here. Uh, (He takes the earring out.) ow! Emily, will you marry me?
Joey: Monica and Rachel made out. (Giggles like a schoolboy and Monica glares at him.)
Rachel: So what?! Yknow what? The way I see it(Phoebe pulls out a hair from the back of her head)Ow! Son of a bitch!!
Monica: Okay. (Chandler grabs the dish from Monica and hands it to Will who starts dishing out a large helping.)
Ross: Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.
Chandler: Okay, so he's out of here.
Molly: (goes out of the room) Hey! Guys, this is Tabatha (they kiss on the lips in a romantic way). (to Ross) I'll see you tomorrow.
David: Please, clean my beakers. I dont get out of the lab much.
Chandler: Yeah, I miss that too. I tell you what; from now on well make time to hang out with each other.
Rachel: Uh, Mon, you-you gonna leave your shoes out here?
RACH: Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie?
Joey: You can't go out there.
Joey: (in a funny voice) Yeah, so it turns out that it wasnt the hair straightener that started the fire. (Rachel prompts him on what to say next.) No-no, it was the candles. Its very not good leaving candles unattended. In fact, one of the first things they teach you in fire school is (Phoebe suddenly enters.) Uhh Uhh Okay. Well, I have to go now. (Phoebe leaves.)
Ross: (sets out a bunch of shot glasses and starts to poor himself a drink, many drinks) Im an idiot. I mean shoulda seen it, I mean Carol and Id be out and shed, shed see some beautiful woman, and, and shed be Ross y'know look at her, and Id think, God, my wife is cool!
All: Ohhh! Put it out!
(Ross runs out too.)
Joshua: Anyway, she burned all of my clothes. I got away with two things. This suit and what turned out to be a skirt.
Joey: Over there! (Points to the couch) Before, with the bills! You tried to give some charity, I said "No," you dropped it. Okay? Then we had a nice last night together, we had some fun, we gambled, nobody tried to give anybody any money! Now out of the blue, you start with the charity thing again!
Monica: (freaking out) What-what-whats that now?!
Rachel: Oh really? So youre saying they just slid out of your bottom drawer, crawled across the floor, then jumped on to my desk?! (I think Dogbert should have a line here.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is kneeling at the coffee table and has a bunch of pictures laid out in front of her as Rachel enters.]
Chandler: Okay! (He joins her on one knee) Okay! Okay! Oh God, I thought (Starting to cry, pauses) Wait a minute, I-I can do this. (Pause) I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you, (Pause) you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. (Starting to cry again.) And if youll let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. (Pause as he gets out the ring.) Monica, will you marry me?
Chandler: Oh God, it freaked me out. Okay, I know it shouldnt have, but it did. I mean I like her, I dont want to stop seeing her, but every so often its like Hey, y'know what, wheres your leg? I mean Im the smallest person in the world arent I? Im the smallest person in the world.
Phoebe: For what? I cant believe this! I gotta get out of here. (leaves)
Girl: Get out.
Phoebe: But lately all the guys I meet seem really nice at first, then they turn out to be the biggest jerks.
Rachel: Well, the cat... the cat turned out to be Paolo's cat!
Monica: Back then, I thought that I would never, ever get the chance to go out with a Chip Matthews, and now hes-hes called me up and asked me out. And the fat girl inside of me really wants to go. I-I owe her this. I never let her eat.
RACHEL: Well then uh, we better make this night count. [He starts to carry her out.] Oh wait, I forgot to turn off the cappucino machine. [He carries her over to turn it off.] Anchors away. Oh no no, my purse, my purse, my purse, my purse, my purse, my pu rse. [He carries her to the counter to pick up her purse.] Oh, you know what. I forgot to turn off the bathroom light.
Chandler: (pause) No, were still together. Yeah we went out for two summers, and then I broke up with her.
Joey: Yeah, shes been out there for twenty minutes, Im surprised you didnt hear her on the way over.
Ross: (showing the Playboy magazine to Gunther) Oh, hey, Gunther, check this out.
Mrs. Geller: I'm telling you, it's a wonder your mother turned out to be the positive, life-affirming person that she is.
Phoebe: Oh, Im so sorry. Um, and maybe Im wrong! I butyknow Im gonna go out with him again, Ill find out more.
Monica: Ok people, we are back in business! (Gets her headset out of her purse) Oh God, we've missed you soo much! (takes all the notes from Phoebe) Ok, go and get your hair and make-up done, and I'll take care of everything.
Joey: What are they doing out here? The coasts all the way over there. (Points to the coast, meanwhile there is coast behind him.)
[Scene: Outside of Central Perk, Phoebe is exiting and sees a woman put out her cigarette on a tree.]
Ross: Right, they are scary. (He jumps up, screaming) Ahh, she just ate a treat out of my hand!!!
Ross: (tries to snatch it from the kid) GIVE ME MY PUCK!! (but it files out of his grasp and knocks out the receptionist)
Chandler: You kidding? You're the most beautiful woman in most rooms... (She jumps up and kisses him.) (Breaking the kiss.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What's going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
Chandler: it was like the Algonquin kids table. (They all laugh, but Joey only laughs not to be left out.)
Joey: Check it out. (He turns around, pulls down his pants, and shows Phoebe that hes got panties on.) How much of a man am I?!
Monica: (coming out of the bedroom) You jerk! You know how much I love that kid! (starts to chase Ross around the living room)
Monica: Absolutely! It would just be one friend (Points at Chandler) helping out another friend. (Points at herself.)
Joey: OK. (Ross goes out on the balcony to talk to Rachel)
Phoebe's Assistant: Oh, here comes your 3:00. I don't mean to sound unprofessional, but, yum (walks out, Paolo enters)
Joey: I cant believe Ross went out with Rachels sister! When Chandler made out with my sister I was mad at him for 10 years.
(Phoebe and Joey run back out and head towards the street.)
Monica:: Honey why don't you just let it go and ask her out again.
Monica: Are you kidding?! I get a Porsche and the barca loungers gone?! This is the best day ever! (Runs out.)
Joey: Yeah, well don't get me wrong, you're a better agent than she is, but at least with her I don't want to blow my pretty dumb brains out.
Jill: Me go out with Ross?! No! God no! What would make you think that?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica carries a box out of Rachels room.]
Phoebe: He is sweet. Hes too sweet. He calls me all the time. (Mimicking him) "So did-did you get home from work okay?" "Did-did you get out of the shower okay?"
Rachel: What're you guys doing out here?
Joey: Yeah and wed go check it out, but you took away our keys.
Phoebe: That's easy for you to say, I don't see three kids coming out your vagina!
Chandler: Yeah! (Monica falls asleep) No! No! No! Dont fall asleep! Okay, I am going to make you some coffee. (Monica doesnt move as he gets out of bed and as hes heading for the door.) And I probably wont spill coffee grounds all over the kitchen floor.
Joey: I'm telling ya... (his eyes open wide and he looks like his eyes are about to pop out. He stares at Ross like this without blinking) I can do it.
Joey: Ohh. Hey, remember when I ran into this thing (The shutters that close off the kitchen.) and it kinda knocked me out a little?
Ross: I just asked that girl out.
Joey: What? Are you referring to my man's bag? At first, I thought it just looked good, but it's practical too. Check it out! It's got compartments for all your stuff! Your wallet! Your keys! Your address book!
[Joey gets out and sprints to the bathroom and Chandler follows with a cigarette in his hands.]
Joey: Yeah, that's because we had a bit of a falling out. Mike hit my mom with a car.
Monica: (walking around with her headset still on) OK LET'S GET THESE CHAIRS OUT HERE! Gunther, hit the Christmas lights. (He does so and the lights above the chairs light up. Monica looks satisfied) Okay, who left the ice sculpture (picks up a piece of ice from the ground) ON THE STEAM GRATE? (nobody answers)
Monica: Since we've been going out, I think I've mentioned his name twice!
Chandler: Stay out of my freezer! [Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are still eating.]
Joey: Why, are you moving out?
Phoebe: Are you moving out?
Rachel: Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to Paris? Sure. You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital of the world? Ooh, absolutely... Oh...! Yeah, but you know, this is... it's fine. I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of that I possibly can... (she sits down, and Ross who is stunned to hear all this follows her example)
(They all start out, Rachel gives each one a kiss, and says "bye." In the hall, Joey says )
Ross: No. No-no uh, he just, he just really freaked me out before.
Rachel: Well, I don't know, you guys figure it out, I got to put Emma down for a nap.
Chandler: All right, think about it. Now remember when you were going out with that girl Donna and you guys broke up. Remember how horrible it was when you guys bumped into each other at the supermarket?
(Chandler leans over the back of the couch out of sight.)
Ross: Okay. Um, how about these? (Holds out a pair)
Ross: (holding a dress out from inside the closet) This one?
Monica: (spitting out her drink in shock) Oh God, oh God, I am sorry... I am so sorry...
Ross: Aw, we-we are so (Motions that theyre connected.) So umm, well I-I-I like you and I-I love umm, yknow hanging out with you. And I mean-Im having a lot of fun. (He pauses and thinks there might be more, but decides there isnt.)
Monica: What?..... What, you wanna spell it out with noodles?
Phoebe: Well, I think you're gonna appreciate it the crap out of this one (she gives him a check)
Ross: So, eh. I made out with Adrienne and you made out with Missy. Well I guess we're even.
Chandler: I know it. You know, I'm totally gonna ask her out.
Phoebe: No, no, no. It's not! It's not my mom. It belonged to mom. Yeah, no, she used to put it out every Christmas to remind us, that even though it's Christmas, people still die. And, you can put candy in it. (She grabs the skull, pulls out a stick of licorice, and takes a bite.)
Chandler: See, I'm finding out all this stuff about you today, like you like the Law & Order and that you flirted with every guy in the Tri-State area!
Ross: So, I just finished this fascinating book. By the year 2030, there'll be computers that can carry out the same amount of functions as an actual human brain. So theoretically you could download your thoughts and memories into this computer and-and-and live forever as a machine.
Chandler: I saw you checking me out during the game last night.
Danny: Okay, see ya. (Heads out.)
Chandler: (Comes out of his room) What? What?
Monica: Ok, here we go. We need to sort out the tickets as quickly as possible to see if we've won. So does anybody have any ideas how to organize this? (doesn't let them answer) Ok, how about this: we divide them into 6 groups of 40, and the remaining 10 can be read by whoever finishes their pile first.
GRANDMOTHER: Esther Livingston. [scratches out name] Gone.
(The group does the same horrible dance that Joey did earlier in the show, except they're all out of sync and they do the jazz hands at the end.)
Monica: Would you stop? Weve only been going out a couple of weeks, I mean we dont even know if hes gonna propose.
Joey: I mean seriously, shes like the perfect woman. I mean I know she turned me down, but if she hadnt and wanted to be with me, I would take her in my arms and (Realizes everyone is staring.) I havent bummed you guys out like this in a while have I?
Monica: Roger wants to take her out tomorrow night.
Mike: I just think there's somebody better out there for you, (pause) I mean I'm not saying me but. maybe me.
Ross: (coming out of the bedroom) Oh! Oh my God! I didnt even see you!
Rachel: Ohh, my new assistant is working out, yes.
Monica: Rach, come see who's out here!
Chandler: (entering) Check it out! Check it out! When the babies wake up, they can meet Krog! (He holds up this Xena-like warrior action figure.)
(Rachel comes out.)
Joey: Thats right! I helped you guys out a lot in the start of your relationship. Huh? I helped you guys sneak around for like six months, and I looked like an idiot! And I was humiliated. And I only made 200 dollars!