words in movies
Joey: Yeah, the other day I was at the bus-stop and this lovely fall breeze came in out of nowhere and blew this chick's skirt right up. Oh! Which reminds me, I'm also thankful for thongs. (Note: Actually, I think every guy is thankful for thongs. That and spandex. J )
Joey: Oh, come on! I wanna hear it! It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without Chandler bumming us out!
Chandler: It's a tradition, like the parade. If the parade decided it was gay, moved out, and abandoned its entire family.
Past Life Phoebe: More bandages! More bandages! Please, can I get some more bandages in here! This man is dying(She is cut off by an exploding shell just outside the tent. When the smoke clears, she's missing an arm and the blood is pumping out like you'd see in a horror movie. And upon seeing her condition, she says ) Oh no.
Joey: Look. (He walks out of the bathroom with his head stuck in a huge turkey.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! Monica's gonna totally freak out!
(They both pull but Joey slips out and starts to fall backwards just as Chandler enters, scaring him.)
Joey: Hey, I wasn't the only one who looked like an idiot. All right? Remember when Ross tried to say, "Butternut squash?" And it came out, "Squatternut buash?"
Monica: I'll get it! (She runs in, and she's her old fat self like The One With The Prom Video. Not only that, she's out of breath after running a short distance. She goes over and opens the door to reveal Rachel with her old nose.) Happy Thanksgiving!
Big Nosed Rachel: Well, you know that my parents are out of town and Chip was going to come over
Big Nosed Rachel: Okay, Monica, can you just call it sex?! It really creeps me out when you call it that! Okay, and by the way, while we're at it, a guy's thing is not called his tenderness. Believe me! (Walks into the living room and greets Monica's parents.) Hi!
(As she is drinking, Monica laughs and Chandler's joke and Diet Coke comes out of her nose.)
(Ross points out Rachel to Chandler and goes over to talk to her. Rachel is checking out her nose in her compact mirror.)
Big Nosed Rachel: Ugh! I cannot believe Chip dumped me for that slut Nancy Branson. I am never going out with him again. I don't care how much he begs!
Fat Monica: I think his begging days are over now that he's going out with Nancy Branson.
Ross: So Im thinking about asking Rachel out tonight. Y'know maybe play her that song we wrote last week.
Chandler: Right on! Oh! Uh, but, dont take to long okay? 'Cause uh, we're gonna test out our fake ID's tonight, right Clifford Alverez.
Ross: Listen, Roland Chang, if things go well, Im gonna be out with her all night.
(Upon hearing this, Monica starts to break down and storms out. Only to be stopped by her parents.)
Chandler: I am so sorry. I really am. I was an idiot back then. I rushed the stage at a Wham concert for crying out loud!
Rachel: No, God! Please, let me! (Runs out.)
Monica: And when he's naked I can throw him out in the front yard and lock the door and all the neighbors will just humiliate him!
Monica: Oh yeah, of course. I'm fine it's just that(She drops the box and in a reflex action tries to catch it with her arm, the knife slips out and slowly flips through the air and comes point first down into Chandler's shoe.)
Monica: Oh yes! I have it right here, on ice! (She takes a bag of ice out of her purse and hands it to the doctor.)
Chandler: Yeah, well, I miss the tip! It's the best part. It has the nail. (He storms out.)
Monica: Chandler! (Follows him out.)
(Joey walks in and sees Monica. He freaks out and runs back into the hallway, screaming.)
French Phoebe: Gauze! Gauze! I need to get some gauze in here! Can I please get some gauze in here! (A shell explodes outside next to the tent and when the smoke clears, Phoebe still has her arm.) Whew! (Her arm falls off and starts pumping out blood.) This is getting ridiculous uh!
Chandler: Top of the world? Dock of the bay? (He tries to think of another but can't) I'm out.
Joey: (looking out the window) Ewww! Ugly Naked Guy is using his new hammock. Its like a Play-Doo Fat Factory.
TV Announcer: Pete Becker is circling the ring now. It looks like, hes just trying to feel him out. Oh, Bruiser is just...
PHOEBE: Yeah and oh, and but there's, there's wind and the wind can make us Goddesses. But you know who takes out wind? Men, they just take it.
Charlie: No, it's just... I was enganged to a guy who turned out to be gay!
Phoebe: If we are not doing it together, we're not doing it at all! So, say goodbye to your tickets! (She holds out the bowl, and makes as to drop the tickets on the street).
Monica: Okay. Oh but Joey, come over later because Im going to teach you to make a bird feeder out of just a pine cone and some peanut butter.
ROSS: Oh, oh my God, is this the wrong day? I don't believe it, uh, well, hey, I guess if it works out we'll, we'll have something to tell the grandkids.
All: Oh! (They stop hugging her to let her out and resume the hug without her.)
Chandler: I am only one man! (Monica heads out) Okay Ross, time is up!
Phoebe: All right. No, no, no, not a Richard thing, just put down the glass. And get out!
Phoebe: But are you saying that you would move out if I didnt buy that lamp?
RACHEL: OK, here we go. Honey, I'm sorry, they were all out of apple pie, someone just got the last piece.
(As they walk out he motions to Chandler that he is still Ben's godfather.)
Ross: Hey look, Phoebe. I, uh, I laid out the states geographically...
Joey: Arg... Alright, I'll take care of it. <throws hands out in the air>
Phoebe: Yeah, she clamed she had to go out of town suddenly. Shes avoiding me, she doesnt want to tell me where my Father is. She knows, and she wont tell me.
Chandler: Yes-yes, I was just trying to figure out a way to uh, demonstrate how I could get my exceptionally large feet into my even bigger mouth.
Chandler: Thank God you didn't try to fan out the magazines. I mean, she'll scratch your eyes right out.
Rachel: So wh..? He's smart, he's qualified. Give me one good reason we shouldn't try him out.
PHOEBE: Well, I've never had it, I feel so left out. [Sees a red bump on her arm.] Oh look!
ROSS: Well, I guess I'm gonna call the beer company and try to find out where he is.
Ross: The flirting! Aren't you supposed to be going out with, I don't know hmm, let's say my sister?!
ROSS: [in a childish voice] I hope you cleaned your hair out of the drain.
Monica: Okay, this is the den. All right, check this out. Lights! (the lights turn on automatically, but are very bright) Whoa! All right. Less lights! Bad lights! Lights go away! (they dim) Oh, see you just need to find the right command.
JOEY: Hold it hold it. I gotta side with Chandler on this one. When I first moved to the city, I went out a couple of times with this girl, really hot, great kisser, but she had the biggest Adam's apple. It made me nuts.
PHOEBE: Would you stop already? Get out of the bitter barn and play in the hay.
Rachel: Well, actually Gunther sent me. Youre not allowed to have cups out here, its a thing. (takes her cup and goes back inside)
Joey: Thanks, Rach. Look, you guys are just terrific. Yknow? Now, how about clearing out of here so I can get some new customers. Its all about turnover.
Rachel: You are so just doing this out of spite.
(He goes to open the door to his apartment, but finds it locked. As he's getting out his keys, Chandler and Monica quickly jump up from making out in the living room and run to Chandler's bedroom. The apartment has about 20 candles burning all over the place. Joey opens the door and ushers Cynthia in.)
PHOEBE: But, but this is my gig. This is where I play. My, my name is written out there in chalk. You know, you can't just erase chalk.
Hayley: no that's just where you were going I just figured that I'd help you out, you don't seem like the kind of guy that does this very a lot.
Chandler: (waking Joey) Hey, check out that girl! She is really hot!
(Suddenly, everyone stands up and comes out of hiding. All of them are glaring at Monica.)
(Joey jumps up in excitement and without turning around Chandler holds out his hand stopping him, and ushering him back into his seat. Joey sits down, dejected.)
Charlie: (to Joey) So, I have to go shopping today, which is my least favourite thing, I'm soo bad at picking out clothes!
<Amy runs towards Rachel and Rachel puts her arm out, hand on Amy's head and Amy starts trying to hit her but is missing, Rachel is moving backwards towards the table when her hand swipes the one plate left on the table on to the floor>
Erin: Look, hes a really great guy and I know that you really want this to work out, but I just dont see this having a future.
Joey: Yes, now is when you swoop! You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks out of there, the first guy Rachel sees is you, She's gotta know that you're everything he's not! You're like, like the anti-Paolo!
Rachel: Well, believe it or not, it's true. When Joey and I were together, he was wonderful. He was thoughtful and mature. And for the one week that we went out, he didn't sleep with anybody else!
Danny: (To Monica) On the date, I will be able to talk to her directly? (To Rachel) See ya Friday. (He walks out.)
Monica: No! No! I shouldnt have even opened these! I mean IJoey I am out of control!! Joey, you have to do me a favor. No matter what I say, no matter what I do, please do not let me open another present! Okay?
Phoebe: (smiling from ear to ear) Well, Gladys say hello to your new home! (she holds out the 'painting')
Joanna: Sophie, would you please climb out of my butt. Why hasnt he called, Rachel? Why?
Mona: No, its still wet. Yknow what? Let me get it out before it sets. Ooh, I have something you can wear. Here. (Hands him Rosss shirt.)
Mr. Geller: (To Ross) Screw it! Im having one. (Takes out and lights a cigarette.)
RYAN: I better get out of here, I'm gonna miss my flight.
MRS BUFFAY: He went out for groceries.
Phoebe: (looking out the window) Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler! (Starts yelling.) Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey! (Chandler and Monica start taking each other's clothes off.) Ohh!! Ohh! Ahh-ahhh!!
(Rachel sticks a marshmallow into Monica’s nose. Monica takes it out of her nose by closing one nostril, and blowing.)
Rachel: Ross, look, I know that some of this stuff is out there, but I mean, come on, look at this, look at this sweater! (she picks up a blue sweater). I mean, this is just beautiful!
(Ross pulls out a huge box of laundry detergent.)
Phoebe: Look out, incoming pumpkin pie!
[They keep kissing and start scratching each other. Ross enters, takes one look, and goes right back out the door.]
Phoebe: Yeah. See, that money was for a big wedding, that we thought we didn’t want, but it turns out we do.
Charlie: See, I told you I needed someone! Oh, you know, by the way, as a "thank you", I would really love to take you out.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment.� Ross and Mike are sitting on the sofa.� Ross is fidgeting with the cuff of his sweater while Mike blows his cheeks out.� Ross blows a piece of fuzz from his finger.)
Phoebe: Hey! Check it out! This is unbelievable! Joey has been holding his breath for almost four minutes!
Joey: (looking out the window) Hey-hey, check it out! Check it out! Ugly Naked Guy has a naked friend!
Chandler: Okay this is great, but Joey said he didn't want any of us out there.
Phoebe: Oh, I love you Hexadrin! (She kisses the box.) Oh look! It comes with a story! (She pulls out the instructions and side affects paper.)
Carol: Mm-hmmm (Susan and Carol hug, giggling. Ross stands back, reaches out and lightly taps Susan's shoulder)
(Suddenly, a strange and familiar voice comes out of the tape player. Heres a hint, OH MY GAWD!! Thats right, its Janice!)
Ross: Can we, can we just stop for a second? Who said something better would come along, huh? You didn't believe me. I told you everything was gonna work out. (gasps) You know what? This calls for a bottle of Israels finest.
Joey: All right, All right, let's just get this out in the open okay? You're hot. I'm lovable. Clearly there's a vibe going on between us. But, we're roommates and it's a huge mistake for us to continue down this road.
Monica: Wait, you cant have the baby here! I mean I havent sterilised it since the guys moved out!
Lauren: (at the window, shes looking down out of the window) What do you got down there, Vic? What do you got under that tarp?
Phoebe: So umm, Im gonna get us some drinks. (To Rachel) Would you help me out?
RACHEL: When I was um, 7, I crashed my bike right out in front of his house and to stop me from crying he kissed me right here. [points to the tip of her nose]
Ross: You know what, I'm sure your wish is gonna come true, but, you guys - just in case, maybe a genie will come out if we rub this lamp! (rubs lamp, stops because it's very hot) Ah!! That thing gets hot!!
Mr. Geller: I'm not freaking out, I'm just saying, if somebody had come to me with the idea andndash;
Joey: Oh, it was great! Yeah, I-I walked her home, and it was amazing how much we connected, y'know? Then ah, then she passed out, but then she woke up. Yeah? And we stayed up all night talking, and now were like totally crazy about each other!
(Joey takes out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He fumbles and drops the lighter. Then he lights a cigarett, takes a drag, and coughs.)
Frank Jr.: Oh, that's Frank Jr. Jr. pulling the tampons out of the lady's purse. And that's Chandler climbing on Chandler, and that's Leslie throwing bagels at him.
[Scene: Phoebe's grandmother's place. Phoebe's grandmother is sitting at the table, reading the obituaries, and crossing out names in the phonebook.]
(Liam and Devon both take a swig of their beers, while Ross takes a swig of his coffee. The Brits both crush their cans, and not to be out done, Ross crushes his coffee cup, spilling its contents.)
Sarah: So thats two boxes of the Holiday Macaroons. On behalf of the Brown Birds of America, I salute you. (Does the Brown Bird salute, she blows on a bird call, then holds her hand, palm facing out, next to her face, and then waves it like a bird flapping its wings.)
ROSS: Alright you know, why don't I just meet you upstairs. [Drops her on the couch and walks out holding his lower back.]
PHOEBE: We have got to get you lazy boys out of these chairs.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Chandler has the tape measure out and is busy lining up the lamp on the kitchen counter, Ross is supervising the whole operation.]
Phoebe: Uh-huh. Okay. Okay, don't you think, maybe, though, it's just that he's so perceptive that it freaks you out?
Monica: Well maybe we can make a, a, a 'B' out of one of those roses.
Ross: What are you talking about? You get sixty responses just for coming out of the closet! I didn't get one response! And I'm dead!
The Doctor: Definitely. (Points out each head on the ultrasound.)
Phoebe: Okay. I have just a few questions to ask so I'm going to get out my official forms. (She picks up a couple of crumpled receipts.) Okay, so, question 1) You and uh, you were married to Francis' daughter Lilly, is that correct?
Rachel: Ok, great, because I gotta get out of here, the smell of beets is killing me!
Monica about to have a heart attack: Okay, listen I know you're having a little bit of a family crisis, but you don't have to take it out on the plates. I mean, I mean in fact I think that everyone should cut their food like this.
Ross: Yeah. The doctor got the 'K' out. He also found an 'M' and an 'O'.
ROSS: [comes out of the bedroom] Rachel. [growls then sees Richard standing there] Hey.
Rachel: Storming out!
Joey: (clinks his glass) Id like to propose a toast. To Monica and Chandler, the greatest couple in the world. And my best friends. Now, my when I first found out they were getting married I was, I was a little angry. I was like, (overly angry) "Why God? Why? How can you take them away from me?!" But then I thought back over all our memories together, some happy memories. (Does a fake laugh.) And-and there was some sad memories. (Starts to break down and cry.) Im sorry. And-and some scared memoriesWhoa! (He jumps back, startled.) Eh? And then, and then I realized Ill always be their friend, their friend who can speak in many dialects and has training in stage combat and is willing to do partial nudity. (Starts to walk away, but realizes something.) Oh! To the happy couple!
Ross: Yeah, didn�t I mention that? Yeah, I mean, we haven�t being going out for too long, but rather there is thisamazing connection between us. I-I mean, in fact just before you came in she called me her boyfriend. I thought it wasa little too soon, but it was also, you know, it was kinda nice.
Chandler: Joey, why is your cable out?
Monica: Yknow what? It really creeps me out choosing other peoples sex clothes.
Announcer: Knicks fans, please turn your attention to the big screen on the score board. Someone has a special question to ask. (on the screen there’s written ‘Julie, will you marry me?’ and goes on to show a guy kneeling down in front of a girl holding out a ring to her)
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment, its Monicas bridal shower and Phoebe is passing out some finger food.]
Ross: Well, you know what... I-I'm sorry I'm the only one who isn't in love with Gary Poppins out there... But I just... I can't... I can't go through with this.
Joey: Don't worry, there wasn't any sex in it or anything. I haven't dreamt about her like that since I found out about you two--ish.
Ross: Ok now, remember, when you get to the museum, Monet is not spelt M-O-N-A-Y. I just... I wrote that out phonetically for you.