words in movies
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
Ross: Okay, okay. Uh, well uh, Rachel is going to need to yell sweet nothings (Paul enters) in his ear.
[Scene: Rachels Bedroom, Paul and Rachel are recovering.]
Paul: I usually prefer Elizabeths boyfriends to address me as Mr. Stevens.
Ross: Okay, please-please Paul, just let me explain
Paul: I dont like you going out with my daughter Ross.
Paul: Fine! Two minutes. Go.
Paul: Thats exactly what my dad used to say! (Starts to breakdown again.)
Paul: (entering) Hi honey.
Paul: I know. I like it up here.
Paul: I wanted to be one with the waves, yknow?
Paul: Whats the matter honey? Did you see a little mouse?
Paul: Nope! That never happened to me!
Ross: Well if it doesnt matter to her, it doesnt matter to me! (to Paul) Still not yelling!
Elizabeth: This is my father, Paul Stevens. Dad, this is Ross Geller.
Paul: Really?! (She nods in the affirmative.)
Paul: Elizabeth, what are you doing here?! (Motions that he brought Rachel here to be alone with her.)
Rachel: Yeah thats great Paul, but yknow I wanna know what(Puts her hands on his shoulders)Wow, those are really great! I just wanna know what, what is behind this-this strong, silent exterior. Yknow they say that still waters run deep and I wanna swim in yours.
Paul: (panicked) What?
Paul: Im just me, my wife died shortly after Lizzie was born.
Monica: (sees someone) Paul!
Paul: Ill call you later. Bye Ross. (Leaves)
Paul: I had a sister.
Monica: Maybe. Joey: Wait. Your 'not a real date' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?
Paul: Yeah Ross its okay, its me, Mr. Stevens.
Paul: (jumping up) Elizabeth! Oh look, Elizabeths here! Who are you talking to?
Paul: I beg your pardon?
Paul: What?! I cant believe youre trying to stifle me! When just 14 hours ago we figured out that that is exactly what my mother was trying to do to me!
[Scene: Their Building, Monica and Rachel are going to apologize to Danny. Rachel knocks on his door, which he opens and he has this really bushy beard and long hair. Picture Paul Bunyan.]
Joey: Come on! Itll be fun! Me, you, and Ross, and Paul probably
Ross: Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, and Ill get us all some uh some coffees(He goes to pull out Elizabeths chair, but Paul steps in)Yeah, why dont you. (Paul pulls out her chair) Uh and you guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into your head. (He turns his back to Paul and Elizabeth and points to himself for Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe. Then he goes to order the coffee.)
[Time Lapse, Paul is now weeping uncontrollably in Rachels arms.]
Paul: Wait! Wait! Listen! Listen to this! (Flips a couple pages and points to something.) Yknow what I wanted to be when I was that age?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is at the counter drinking coffee as Elizabeth enters with her dad, Paul. Elizabeth goes to kiss Ross, but he just kisses her on the forehead. By the way Paul is played by Bruce Willis. Yes, that Bruce Willis from Moonlighting, Die Hard, and Armageddon.]
Paul: Okay. Ill be right back. (Gets up and heads for the kitchen.)
Chandler: But uh Ross, Ross is a great guy! I was roommates with him in college. Uh, funny story (He starts laughing then notices that Paul isnt happy.) Youre roommate in college died didnt he?
Paul: Joey! (Goes over and hugs Joey and picks him off of his feet.)
Joey: Whoa-whoa-hey-hey! (Motions to Chandler, "Whats going on?") Hi, Paul is it? (Paul nods yes and still hugging Joey.)
[Scene: Pauls Cabin, Paul and Rachel are sitting on the couch drinking wine and talking.]
Paul: No, it's, it's more of a fifth date kinda revelation.
Chandler: Stay out of my freezer! [Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are still eating.]
Paul: (barely glancing at her) No. What ever happened to that little dude. (Pause) So full of dreams
Monica: You mean you know Paul like I know Paul?
Paul: (entering) Here you go honey. One Diet Coke with ice.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Ross is entering looking for Joey, but instead he finds Paul and Rachel making out on the couch.]
(Paul reveals his presence by laughing, thus concluding standard sitcom joke 2B. Paul then pulls Ross aside to have a little chat with him and tells the rest of the group that hell just be one second.)
Ross: Okay, umm I want you to know that I have never done anything like this before. I mean, I mean Ive been in um, relationships in general, uh but I have never done it with a studentI mean I notnot it! I mean, I mean I dontWe havent done it. Uh, I mean, I mean, weve-weve-weve done stuff. (Paul is not amused.) Okay, okay, a joke, a jokelighten the mood. Umm, two guys go into a bar. One of them is Irish.
Paul: Well, you might try accidentally breaking something valuable of hers, say her-
Paul: And anyhow, Im sorry I was so harsh before, but you have to understand that I (pause) still look at Lizzie like shes a twelve-year-old girl.
Monica: Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. (They are all lined up next to the door.)... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are eating.]
Paul: Why cant you get a girlfriend your own age?
Paul: No! No! Its just that, my dad never did. I miss my dad.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Paul is writing something as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Really? Okay. Okay, I-Ill go upstairs. (to Paul) If-if you get me something from the car.
Ross: (returning with the coffee) Okay here we are Paul, Elizabeth. (He sets down their cups.) So I hope you guys were finding something to talk about.
Paul: Let me just see if I got this straight. I tell you to stay away from my daughter or Ill have you fired. What you heard was, "Take my daughter, come up to my country house, and ruin my weekend with Rachel!"
Ross: All right, fine! Fine! Have me fired! But uh, I want you to know that you and I are not all that different. I mean, I too am a neat guy. (Paul just looks at him.)
Rachel: Paul. Umm, I just wanted you to know that Ross really is a great guy.
Paul: Sure you did! You came in, you got all awkward, and you ran into the bedroom. You were shouting, "Joey! Joey!" Bye Rach. (Kisses her.)
Paul: Ross, look, I know Ive been giving you a lot of jabs and its partly because Im very protective of Lizzie, and partly because well, they just keep coming to me. But I have to admit that after all the wonderful things that Lizzie has told me and the many, many, (pause) many stories that Rachel has told me that, well (pause) youre not (pause) all bad.
Paul: Well, ever-ev-... ever since she left me, um, I haven't been able to, uh, perform. (Monica takes a sip of her drink.) ...Sexually.
Rachel: Uh, Pauls Caf�. They got great food and its really romantic.
Paul: Oh, you dont have to do that every time.
Paul: (To Rachel) Thank you, its my moms. So this is the kitchen.
Chandler: Im a little busy here Paul.
Paul: Diet Coke. (Hands her the glass.)
Paul: (acting manly to try and cover up his crying) Okay. Chandler, did your dad ever hug you?
[Cut to his bedroom, Ross is listening at the door as Paul opens the door, trapping Ross behind it. With Pauls back turned Ross coils up like a snake and slitters underneath the bed.]
Chandler: Its not just their marriage! I mean, look at yours. Look at everybodys! The only person that can make marriage work is Paul Newman! And Ive met me; I am not Paul Newman. I dont race cars! I dont make popcorn! None of my proceeds go to charity.
Rachel: Okay. (After Paul leaves Rachel drops to the floor to confront Ross.) What?! What are you doing here?!
Ross: (to Paul) Just-just so you know I was a freshman and she was a senior. So it wasnt as bad as-as
Rachel: (reading a tag) This one is uh Paul ONeil.
(Paul screams like a chicken and breaks down into tears again.)
Paul: Hi! Hi. (Hes looking around.) I think I left my keys here somewhere.
(Phoebe turns to Rachel and mimes remove a lid of a jar. Ross enters and Paul motions for Rachel to leave with him now.)
(Ross turns his back on Paul and makes a I hate that guy face. Paul does the same thing.)
Chandler: Okay, a quick one. Come on hug it out. (Paul rushes over and hugs Chandler tightly.) Oh hey! There you go. (The hug continues.) Okay. (The hug continues.)
Paul: Honey I made a reservation at China Garden, is that okay?
Paul: Good. Good. Not that we dont want you to stay, obviously youre welcomeHow much more homework do you have?
Paul: Honey, we dont have any bears here.
Joey: Who's Paul?
Paul: (over the intercom) It's, uh, it's Paul.
Paul: Dont worry about it, I just didnt realize you were married. (Rachel returns and hears that.)
Frannie: Paul the Wine Guy? Oh yeah, I know Paul.
Paul: Yeah?
(There's a knock on the door and it's Paul.)
Joey: Hey, Paul!
Monica: Change! Okay, sit down. (Shows Paul in) Two seconds.
Ross: Paul the Wine Guy, Paul?
Paul: Isn't there?
Paul: Ooh, steer clear of you.
Paul: Two years.
Paul: It's okay...
Paul: So you still think you, um... might want that fifth date?
Paul: Thank you! Thank you so much!
Joey: Morning, Paul.
Rachel: Hello, Paul.
Paul: (entering from Monica's room) Morning.
(Monica and Paul walk to the door and talk in a low voice so the others can't hear. The others move Monica's table closer to the door so that they can.)
Paul: Yeah. (They kiss) Thank you. (Exits)