words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is recapping last season, and as she talks we see a montague of scenes from Ross and Rachel.]
Phoebe: Ok, so this is pretty much what's happened so far. Ross was in love with Rachel since, you know, forever, but every time he tried to tell her, something kind of got in the way, like cats, and Italian guys. Finally Chandler was like "forget about her" but when Ross was in China on his dig, Chandler let it slip that Ross was in love with Rachel. She was like, "Oh my god." So she went to the airport to meet him when he came back, but what she didn't know was, that Ross was getting off the plane with another woman. Uh-Oh! So, that's pretty much everything you need to know. But, enough about us. So, how've you been?
Phoebe: Oh my god. This is huge. This is bigger than huge. This is like, all right, what's bigger than huge?
Phoebe: Yes.
Phoebe: 'Cause, you know, (in that voice) if you don't look good, we don't look good. I love that voice.
Ross: That's all right, Rach, we got the bags. Hi, hello. Julie, this is my sister Monica. This is Chandler. Phoebe. Joey, what up?
[Cut to Phoebe and Monica in the kitchen.]
Phoebe: Oh, ok. How, it's been so long since you've had sex, you're wondering if they've changed it?
Phoebe: All right, so what were you thinking?
Phoebe: Ohh! No.
Phoebe: Because, I'm just, I'm incredibly anal and an unbelievable control freak.
Phoebe: I know I'm not, but you are, and I was trying to spare your feelings.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Please, just a little bit off the back.
Phoebe: I'm still on "no."
Phoebe: What's goin' on?
Phoebe: Ewww! (Gets up and walks away.)
Phoebe: Where?
Joey: Whoa, whoa. And the fact that you dumped him because he hit on Phoebe?
Phoebe: (to Paulo) Ok, you're gonna have to not touch my ass.
Monica: (to Phoebe) You know it's funny, the last time Paulo was here, my hair was so much shorter and cuter.
Phoebe: All right. Ok, but, but! You have to promise that you will not be all like control-y and bossy and Monica about it.
Phoebe: All right. (Talking to Monica's hair.) Now some of you are gonna get cut, and some of you aren't. But I promise none of you are gonna feel a thing.
[Scene: Monica's bedroom, Phoebe is finishing with her haircut and Monica is whincing.]
Phoebe: All right, that's it, I quit.
Phoebe: Yeah, but this (makes Monica's face) isn't the face of a person who trusts a person. Ok, this (makes Monica's face) is the face of a person who, you know, doesn't trust a person.
Monica: I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Phoebe. It's just a little shorter than what we had discussed.
Phoebe: Would you relax? I know what I am doing. This is how he wears it.
Phoebe: Demi Moore.
Phoebe: Well, he was a he in Arthur, and in Ten.
Phoebe: Oh. Oh!
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Phoebe: Oh my God! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Which one's Demi Moore?
Phoebe: Oh, she's got gorgeous hair.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is recovering from her haircut, Phoebe is playing her doctor and is coming in from the bedroom.]
Phoebe: It's too soon to tell. She's resting, which is a good sign.
Phoebe: I'm not gonna lie to you, Ross, it doesn't look good. I put a clip on one side, which seems to have stopped the curling.
Phoebe: Your hair looks too good, I think it would upset her. Ross, why don't you come on in.
Phoebe: (to Chandler and Ross) Thank you.
[Scene: Central Perk, Julie is wanting to get her hair cut from Phoebe.]
Phoebe: Oh yeah! Oh, I can do that.
Phoebe: You wanna do it right now?
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Ok, I just wanna be really sure this time. Andie McDowell's the girl from Four Weddings and a Funeral, right?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah. Ok, thank you.
(She goes into her apartment and sees Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross sitting there.)
Rachel: Better than Chandler. (Phoebe exhales as if to say, "Like what isnt?")
Phoebe: (feels his arm) Yeah the material feels so softhello Mr. Bicep! Have you been working out?
(She goes over and lets Phoebe bounce in wearing her own wedding dress.)
Phoebe: Oh, there you are Ben!
Ben: Aunt Phoebe, what are you doing here?
Phoebe: Uh-huh, Im with Ben.
Phoebe: Oh.
Mike: All right, stop! You know, all Phoebe has done tonight is trying to get you to like her. And maybe that hasn't been clear all the time, but she did her best. And yeah... She's a little different than you are...
Phoebe: Yes! Yes you can, Im looking for Jacks parents.
Phoebe: Ah! Okay so that would make me Susan.
Phoebe: Nesele Toulouse.
(He goes out into the hall and re-enters with a bike exactly like the one Phoebe described earlier.)
Phoebe: But why does it even matter?!
Joey and Phoebe: (Ad-lib good-byes) (Phoebe leaves)
Phoebe: Ohh!! Ohh!! And I love you!
Phoebe: Hi!
Phoebe: I don't know, I mean, he's a good person, and he can be really sweet, and in some ways I think he is so right for me, it's just... I hate that guy!
Phoebe: Oh, really? Does it beat water balloon? (She places her hand over his "fire" and mimics a bursting water balloon, thus putting the fire out).
Phoebe: Uh-huh.
Phoebe: Why else would I be here?
Phoebe: (smiling from ear to ear) Well, Gladys say hello to your new home! (she holds out the 'painting')
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Oh, thank you. Four would be great.
Phoebe: Umm, Im sorry. Wont-wont Jacks father be joining us?
Phoebe: The Police? Here? A reunion?! (She gets out her camera.)
Phoebe: Oh good! Then youre in luck! Bens not my son!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Phoebe are sitting at the table, Joey and Chandler enter.]
Rachel: Phoebe?
Phoebe: Yeah?
Phoebe: Oo, where are the seats?
Phoebe: Then thats not breaking the law! Im there!
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Wait a second! This is about the fourth month of your pregnancy, right?
Phoebe: (answering the phone) Hello? (Listens) Hey Joey!
Phoebe: Bye.
Monica: Ahh, Phoebe, I'm gonna miss you!
Phoebe: Okay, I'll do it, but just these three, right
Phoebe: Wait, Im-Im sorry. Whats the big deal about a holiday card?
Bitsy: The woman you what? (Phoebe overheard what Michael said and now enters the room)
Phoebe: Yeah... The woman you what?
Frank: (To Phoebe) Hey! Am I late? Am I late? Nobody came out yet, right?
(Rachel goes to the fridge, opens it, and blows on the whistle Monica gave her at the store, which causes Phoebe and Monica to turn around and look at her.)
Phoebe: Oh my God.
Phoebe: You wish.
Phoebe: Oh yeah? Come and get it.
Joey: (lying on a beach towel, recapping what happened in the last episode) Okay, so we went to the beach, because Phoebe found out about this lady who knew her mom and dad, and I dont really know what happened with that.
Phoebe: Ugh! Women!
Phoebe: I love you too...
Phoebe: YEAH...! How great is this...? (they kiss)
Phoebe: And youre so sweet. (kisses him on the other cheek) And youre kind (kisses him on the lips)
Phoebe: No, we hate that.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Oh, I can't believe you! You've been so good, for three years!
Phoebe: Oh, sly.
ROSS: Ok, Phoebe, this is it. In this briefcase I carry actual scientific facts. A briefcase of facts, if you will. Some of these fossils are over 200 million years old.
Joey: Its no big deal, okay? Phoebe and I talked about it. Its just a crush! Its going to go away! (Looks down) Dude, you gotta rearrange your bubbles! Oh!
Rachel: Phoebe no!
Phoebe: Uh-huh. (They go and sit down.)
Phoebe: Where?! (Ross exits.)
Phoebe: Umm, hes here to have sex with you.
Phoebe: Youre welcome.
Phoebe: Hi! Okay, Monica, Rachel, this is my friend Roger.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay lets leave these two alone.
(Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe start to pick through the lasagne as there's a knock on the door which Monica answers.)
Phoebe: No, not usually. But yeah, I could use one right now.
[Cut to later in that episode. Chandler is in his bathroom with Monica, and hes panicking on how far Phoebe is pushing him.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is there as Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: Shake it! (Phoebe, Mike, Chandler, Monica and Joey step in)
Mrs. Geller: (rubbing her temples) Thats alot of information to get in in thirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werent supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. (Phoebe makes a sad face.) Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
Phoebe: Hey! I got you a present!!
Phoebe: We have good news, look whose back!
Phoebe: Do you really like it?
Phoebe: Oh really? What was your first?
Phoebe: Ooh, what happened?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Monica are there as Joey is entering excitedly.]
Phoebe: Yeah! Its not like it spits out a Clark bar after every game.
Monica: Okay, Im next. (Phoebe starts another game.) Dont! Dont start another game! I said Im next! Phoebe!
Phoebe: Or, yknow, I used to beg for money. Of course it helps if youve got yknow a little of this (she sticks her chest out and shakes it) goin on. Wow! I still have it!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebes baby shower, she is holding those leather pants, and isnt happy about it.]
Phoebe: (sitting down next to Ross) Yknow she has a face Ross!
Phoebe: Okay, so what do you think ladies? Who wouldnt be interested? Who wouldnt want to date him?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe is reading and Monica runs over and turns on the lamp behind Phoebe.]
Phoebe: (she turns around and puts the cat on the entertainment center) Ross, how many parents have you lost?
Phoebe: (To him) Oh, well hello there.
Monica: Chandler! Phoebes hogging the game!
Phoebe: Oh, boy scouts could have camped under there.
Phoebe: There you go, that's the spirit! Okay! Now, if you need money, I will lend you money, but just get moving!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there as someones cell phone starts to ring with one of those fancy ring tones.]
Phoebe: Yeah! Yknow, we were really huge too, but then they had to shut us down when Regina Philange died of alcohol poisoning.
Phoebe: (simultaneously as Eric) Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew!
Rachel: (changing the subject) Anyway, speaking of drinking too much. I was uh, tellin Phoebe about that one crazy night after the Sigma Chi luau where you and I uh, we made out.
Phoebe: (to Robert) Youve have lipstick right here (points to her cheek). Thats okay, its mine, we just kissed.
Phoebe: Does Joey have any idea?
PHOEBE: Ooh-oh! Someone's wearing the same clothes they had on last night. Someone get a little action?
Phoebe: I know it's le poo right now, but it'll get better.
[Scene: The Gellers Kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are still cooking.]
Phoebe: I know!
Ross: Phoebe!!
Phoebe: Dont touch me!!