words in movies
Phoebe: If you had to, what would you give up, food or sex?
Chandler: (to Phoebe) It's like a giant hug.
Phoebe: Ross, how about you. What would you give up, sex or food?
Phoebe: Ok, how about... uhm... sex or dinosaurs?
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel and Phoebe are looking at some photos and they're sitting next to the window.]
Phoebe: Oh, how cute!
Phoebe: Oh, she looks just like a little doll!
Phoebe: Oh, thank God, 'cause that thing's really creepy! (looking outside the window) Look, there's Chandler. (he's on the street, talking to a woman)
Phoebe: OH! He's having an affair.
Phoebe: You know, I'm always right about these things.
Phoebe: Well, I'm sorry but it's hard to believe that anyone would tell a story that dull just to tell it! (looking outside) See, there's something going on with them. Look, he's getting into the car with her!
Phoebe: Oh yeah? Well, let's see. (she takes her mobile phone) Ok, duck down. (they both get down to hide themselves. Phoebe calls Chandler)
Phoebe: Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so...(back to Central Perk) ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
Phoebe: (shocked) Oh, well, it's a shame that you-that you miss the movie 'cause we were gonna see, you know, either "Liar, Liar" or "Betrayal", or... "An Affair To Remember".
Phoebe: Ok, then maybe it'll be, uhm...
Phoebe: (glancing at her) What?
Phoebe: (to Chandler at the phone) Okay, we-we'll talk to you later. Okay, bye.
Phoebe: Ok. Quick. We gotta find a cab and follow them.
Phoebe: (patting her bag) I got them!
Chandler: I don’t know what you mean, giant talking cigarette! Oh, by the way, Phoebe called just as I was getting into Nancy’s car, so if she asks you, I was at work all day.
Phoebe: So, should we tell her?
Ross: I don’t know. Phoebe, if one of us saw Mike with another woman would you want us to tell you?
Phoebe: Why? Who’d you seen him with?
Ross: No one, I’m just saying if... (Phoebe starts pinching him in his neck)
Phoebe: TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW!
Phoebe: All right. (she releases him). He is a good guy. You’re right, he wouldn’t cheat.
Ross: Believe me, if I did see with someone, there’s no way I... (Phoebe starts pinching him again)
Phoebe : WHO DID YOU SEE HIM WITH?
Phoebe: Well, look, whatever happens, we’re here for you and we love you.
Rachel: Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.
Phoebe: They went in together. So sorry.
Phoebe: What?
Monica: (goes to Chandler) Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
Phoebe: Why do you have a realtor?
Phoebe: So you're gonna move?
Phoebe: Have you thought about what you would be giving up? You can't move out of the city, what if you want Chinese food at 5am? Or a fake Rolex that breaks as soon as it rains or an Asian hooker sent right to your door?
Phoebe: Wha..? Again with the nature, what are you? Beavers?
Monica: We think if you saw it, you'd understand. I mean you guys were there. (Points to Rachel and Phoebe) It is beautiful, isn't it?
Phoebe: Yeah, but so is this.
Phoebe: You guys, you know what I just realized? 'Joker' is 'poker' with a 'J.' Coincidence?
Phoebe: [looking outside the window] Eww, look. Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles.
Phoebe: Hey, it’s your Thanksgiving too, y'know, instead of watching football, you could help.
Phoebe: (walks him to the kitchen) Easy. Step. How did it get on?
Phoebe: Oh my God! Monica's gonna totally freak out!
Phoebe: Well, of course it smells really bad. You have your head inside a turkey's ass!
(They hear Monica trying to unlock the door. So Phoebe quickly pushes his head down onto the table to make it look like the turkey is just sitting on a platter and not stuck on Joey's head.)
Phoebe: Ok, you guys, I don’t mean to make things worse, but umm, I don’t want to live with Rachel anymore.
Phoebe: You’re just so mean to each other! And I don’t want to end up like that with Rachel. I still like you!
Rachel: Well, Phoebe that’s fine because I’m not moving.
Monica: Whoa-whoa-whoa, Phoebe you gotta take her! Y’know, I-I-I said some really bad stuff about her, but y’know Rachel has some good qualities that make her a good roommate. She gets tons of catalogs and umm, she’ll fold down the pages of the things she thinks that I’d like.
Phoebe: What else?
Phoebe: That’s nice. I like having things to read in the bathroom.
Phoebe: Yeah, you don't wanna live in Westchester. That's like the worst of the Chesters.
Phoebe: (to Monica) You're gonna be okay?
Ross: Love you guys. (he kisses Monica, he, Rachel and Phoebe leave.)
Phoebe: Oh! These are the ones I was looking at in the store. (she got earrings)
(they both run off, leaving Ross, Phoebe and Rachel stunned.)
Rachel: Phoebe? (She turns her head further away.) I'm sorry about the whole lifting out thing. (Moves over next to her.) You gotta come with me!
Phoebe and Joey: Oh my God!
Phoebe: Umm, well, umm Grandma died.
Phoebe: Me?!
Phoebe: Gary.
Phoebe: I've always wanted to live with a guy. "Pick up your socks!" "Put down the toilet seat!" "No! We're not having sex anymore!" It's gonna be fun!
(Phoebe puts the picture of Ross up to her face.)
Phoebe: Umm, yeah, I'd like to go out with you officer
Phoebe: I know but I'm having so much fun doing good deeds.
Phoebe: All right, I can't wait!
Phoebe: Yeah, we'll talk at dinner.
(There's a knock on the door which is answered by Phoebe.)
Rachel: Awful, absolutely awful. (Plus other negative comments from Phoebe and Monica.)
Phoebe: Yeah, but, y'know, it's... it would be like starting on the fifteenth date.
Phoebe: You wanna work on your interview skills?
Ross: How weird is that? Yknow? Youre moving in with me and have the one thing I dont have. Its like uh, in a way you-you complete me (Phoebe glares at him) kitchen.
Phoebe: If you wouldve let me finish, it goes on to say that hes probably not gay.
Phoebe: Okay, she would love that! Y'know, 'cause you know all the clean places to eat.
Phoebe: Ohh, impressive.
PHOEBE: Oh my God!� I love things.� What happened?
Phoebe: No, but it is fast. Isn't it?
Phoebe: Oh God!
Phoebe: All right, you go. (They kiss.)
Phoebe: Okay, then maybe I can come too!
Phoebe: 'Kay, bye!
Phoebe: Come on, seriously! When did it end?
Alice: Hi! (She runs over and hugs Phoebes stomach.) So, how did it go at the doctors?
Phoebe: No he wont. And thats not even the point! Monica, I made a whole speech about you do not cancel plans with friends! And now yknow what? Just because, potentially, the love of my life comes back from Russia just for one night, I-I should change my beliefs?! I should change beliefs! No! No! No, if I dont have my principles, I dont have anything!
MONICA: What? [she runs over to where Phoebe is, Phoebe signals for Gunther to go] I don't see anything.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Phoebe are still working on his interviewing techniques.]
Phoebe: Well, his name is Parker and I met him at the drycleaners.
PHOEBE: Ok, I talked to the vet, people are so nice upstate. Anyway, he said that the little fella's gonna be ok and I can pick him up tomorrow.
PHOEBE: Ok. Listen, just don't say anything about me, ok. [goes over and grabs the phone that's sitting by Monica]
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: So Chandler, I-I'd love to come by tonight.
[Scene: The Gellers kitchen, Phoebe is bringing in some dirty dishes.]
Phoebe: But you-you-you came to see Lilly?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Joey is there as Phoebe enters. Joey is holding a baby duck.]
Phoebe: Umm, Im trying to move that pencil. (Theres a pencil lying on the table.)
Phoebe: Mrs. Waltham. Hi. Its Phoebe again.
Phoebe: You tired Chandler?
Phoebe: It worked!
[Scene: An airplane cabin, Phoebe has the aisle seat, Chandler the window, and Monica's stuck in that horrible middle seat.]
Phoebe: Oh, we're just... we're sad to go so we're just saying goodbye to the hotel. (hugs the wall) I love you... Paradise Hotel, Golf resort and Spa... (she walks away from the wall)
Phoebe: What are you talking about?!
Phoebe: Okay, cancel backup! Cancel backup!
Phoebe: Maybe your resolution is to not make fun of your friends, especially the ones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free on their own plane.
Phoebe: Okay, great so do you want to do it together?
Phoebe: But Im a professional! And Im really good! Look, if youre uncomfortable we can stop. Just give me a chance, okay. Please?
Phoebe: I'm gonna find a selfless good dead. I'm gonna beat you, you evil genius.
Phoebe: (to the woman behind her) This place is so depressing. If I had to work here I'd kill myself. (she turns around and the clerk behind the counter heard her.) But you obviously haven't.
Phoebe: Oh good!
Phoebe: Oh good.
Phoebe: What happened to the intimate dinner party?
Phoebe: Hey Rach, you wanna get some coffee?
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe: Like what?
Phoebe: Oh, look at that.
Phoebe: I got it! Mine!
Phoebe: No! No, we have an emergency. Okay? Rachels coming to London.
Phoebe: No, cause she didnt tell me I was gonna die until the very end of the session, and I was not gonna waste a whole another hour there! I mean Ive only got a week left, yknow? Ive really gotta start living now! (So she picks up the latest copy of Car and Driver (a U.S. auto magazine), leans back, and starts reading.)
Phoebe: No!! wait, wait, wait!! Oh please, hold it up so I can listen. (Joey looks at Ross and holds the phone above Rosss shoulder.)
Phoebe: Umm, cups.
PHOEBE: Yeah, it's just so strange. I mean, she probably woke up today and thought, "ok, I'll have some breakfast, and then I'll take a little walk, and then I'll have my massage." Little did she know God was thinking, "Ok, but that's it." Oh, but the weirdest thing was, ok, I was cleansing her aura when she died, and when the spirit left her body, I don't think it went very far.
Phoebe: Tell him it's for you.
Phoebe: Oh God, Im so glad you guys are happy, I was so afraid you were going to be all freaked.
Phoebe: You know, did you ride mopeds? 'Cause I've heard... (they stare at her)... oh, I see... it's not about that right now. OK.
Phoebe: Umm here's your 3-D glasses.
Phoebe: These are not mine... Look how flimsy they are, come on! Good God! You try to hang a guy from a waterpipe with these, they'll snap like a piece of licorice.
[Scene: Iridium Restaurant, Phoebe and Joey are looking at the menus as the waiter comes to take their order.]
Rachel: It wouldn't have mattered anyway, Phoebe, you and I are, are gonna live together, we're roommates; that's the deal.
[Chandler and Phoebe feign ignorance.]
PHOEBE: Bye you. [Ryan's cab drives off. As Phoebe is going back in, she sees the Central Perk sign in the window and laughs.]
Phoebe: Yeah well, that's 'cause Monica put me in charge of cups and ice, and Monica is gonna rue the day that she put me in charge of cups and ice.
Phoebe: Yeah! Or too, you could be two stockbrokers and youre-youre-youre rolling around naked on the trading floor and everybodys watching! (Ross looks at her.) It never happened.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are in the kitchen.]
Phoebe: Ooh, I love that place! (Thinks about it.) So, no.
Joey: (To Phoebe) Hey, is uh the rest of my candy bar around here?
Phoebe: Okay, Widow!
Phoebe: This is so cool!
Phoebe: Okay, well I think that they're in my purse. Why don't you go get dressed and I'll look for them.
Phoebe: Wait, Rach! Where's the other one?
Phoebe: Why not?
Phoebe: Rachel Karen Green, where's the other earring?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
Phoebe: These are her earrings.
Phoebe: Yeah, say my name. Say it! (She stops when she realizes what shes doing.) And now Im going to cover you back up, and umm were never doing this again.
Phoebe: Yeah that's right you are so busted. (To no one in particular.) Book 'em.
(The sitcom begins with its familiar refrain, yet with a Latin lilt. Rachel and Monica do a little dance with their chopsticks, and Phoebe has to grin as Ross joins in the rhythm.)
Phoebe: Ohh! Okay, Im going to have to kick her ass too.
Phoebe: On your dresser.
Phoebe: (smiling) This is terrible, what are you going to do?
(Phoebe gets up.)
Monica: (entering from bedroom) Okay, Ill be back in just a minute. Oh, Phoebe Im sorry that I left lipstick marks on the phone.
Phoebe: I saw it.
Cop: I'm looking for Phoebe Buffay!
Phoebe: Ohh! I did not get that.
Phoebe: (leaning to him) She said, "Hes obviously still in love with this Rachel girl." (He glares at her.)
Phoebe: (overemphasizing) Mmmmmm! Everything smells so delicious! You know, I can't remember a time I smelt such a delicious combination of (Monica signals her to stop) of, OK, smells.
Phoebe: Yeah, I'm gonna go back to being Street Phoebe. Yeah! Oh but, y'know what? I can't go totally back because Street Phoebe really wouldn't be friends with you guys. Sorry. (Leaves.)