words in movies
Joey: Ross! Ross! Ross, listen! Who are you kissing at midnight, huh? Rachel or Phoebe?
Ross: Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
Phoebe: It's so obvious, why doesn't he just ask?
(And with that everyone starts playing tonsil hockey. Chandler with Monica, Ross with Phoebe, and Joey with Rachel.)
Ross: (To Phoebe) Happy New Year, Pheebs!
Phoebe: You too!
Phoebe: Ooh! That's a good one! Mine is to pilot a commercial jet.
Phoebe: Maybe your resolution is to not make fun of your friends, especially the ones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free on their own plane.
Phoebe: Really?! How come?
Phoebe: Do you want me to teach you? I'm a great teacher.
Phoebe: Well, I taught me and I love me.
Joey: Oh really! Where? Somewhere funny I'd bet! (Chandler is straining to keep quiet as Phoebe enters.)
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Hornswoggle? (To Chandler) Ooh, this must be killing you.
Phoebe: Okay. (Joey tries to take the guitar.) Oh no-no-no, you don't touch the guitar! First you learn here, (Points to her head.) then you learn here. (Points to the guitar.)
Phoebe: Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of the chords but umm, I-I-I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them. (She starts to show Joey the chords. Transcribers Note: For this one you'll have to use your imagination, 'cause it would take me 50 pages to describe each one. So if you want to see them, you'll have to wait for this episode to come to a TV near you.) (Holding up her hand and then reconfiguring her hand with each name.) So then, this is Bear Claw. Okay, umm, Turkey Leg and Old Lady. (Joey tries to imitate them.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with Rachel.]
Phoebe: Hey everybody, Rachel was so good today. She didn't gossip at all.
Phoebe: Ooh, you nailed the Old Lady! (They both laugh at what she said.)
Phoebe: Did you, did you touch any of the guitars while you were there? Did you?!
Phoebe: Give me your hands. (He does and she smells his left hand.) Strings. Gimme it! (He gives her his right hand and she smells it as well.) Pick. Do you want to learn to play guitar?
Phoebe: Then don't touch one!!
Rachel: Awful, absolutely awful. (Plus other negative comments from Phoebe and Monica.)
Joey: Well, everyone will enjoy my music as well. (Does a chord and Monica starts taking pictures of him and Phoebe. They both start to strike a pose with the excessive amount of pictures that Monica takes.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is drilling Joey on the chords as Monica looks on.]
Phoebe: Tiger! (Joey moves his hand in an attempt to do the chord, in fact he does it with each name.) Dragon! Iceberg!! (He fails.) Joseph, did you even study at all last night?
Phoebe: Then do Iceberg!
Phoebe: G-sharp? Have you been studying the real names of the chords? (Joey doesn't answer.) Have you? (He looks away in shame.) Oh my God!
Phoebe: No, but you're questioning my method!
Phoebe: Y'know none of my other student thought I was stupid.
Phoebe: Yeah, well, y'know maybe you just need to try a little harder!
Phoebe: Fine! You go learn from your qualified instructor! But don't come crying to me when everyone's sick and tired of hearing you play Bad, Bad Leroy Brown!!
Phoebe: Oh, fine! Take his side! (Storms out.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is there to apologize to Phoebe.]
Phoebe: No, I can't talk to you! I don't have a fancy ad in the Yellow Pages!
Phoebe: Uh-huh!
Joey: Wow! Cool! (He takes the guitar, stands up, and goes to play a note. However, while strumming it, he knocks it out of his hands and it bounces off the table and lands on the floor. Phoebe just stares at the guitar.)
Phoebe: No!
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Okay, I'm gonna go too. I'm gonna go to the airport. I figure if I hang around there long enough, someone's bound to leave one of those planes unattended.
Phoebe: Bye! (She exits, leaving Rachel and Joey alone.)
Joey: Too long! Oh my God, Rach, I've been dying to talk to someone about this for so long! Listen, listen, we can't say anything about this to anybody, they're so weird about that! Listen (Phoebe returns and interrupts them.)
Phoebe: Hey! It's raining. I don't want to fly in the rain. So
Phoebe: That's weird. (Pause.) I bet they're doing it.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Ross, and Monica are there.]
Phoebe: Yeah, and-and leaving us to go see hot dancer girls is not very Thanksgivingy.
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: Oh, you make sex noises when you get massaged!
Phoebe: I mean $500.
Phoebe: 600.
Phoebe: No-no, I got that.
Phoebe: Yes.
Message: (Phoebe's voice) "Hello. Th-this is the pigeon from the balcony calling to apologise" (they all turns to look at Phoebe) "I sh.. I shouldn't have knocked the tickets out of the pretty lady's hand. It-it was all my fault. Not hers. Bye. Coo."
Phoebe: Yeah, okay. Hey, wait. Do you know what kind of birth control she was using?
Phoebe: Ross, please! My make-up! (He walks away angrily.)
Phoebe: Is it me, or is veto starting to sound really good?
Monica: Uh Phoebe?
Phoebe: Thats it. Just relax.
Phoebe: Come on more!
Phoebe: Yeah, you like that dont you?
Phoebe: You want it there? You take it there baby!
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Oh! Hey, Rach!
Phoebe: Oh, you, too.
Phoebe: (sits down next to her and hugs her) Oh no.
Phoebe: Ugh. Come on, Mona, dont kiss ass.
Phoebe: All right. Oh! Shoot! Oh shoot! Uh, Rachel wanted to see this tape!
Phoebe: Oh, Monica, grow up!
Phoebe and Monica: (sympathetic) Ohh!
Phoebe: Umm, well I sorta have some bad news, can I come in?
(Phoebe goes into the hall and brings a dog inside!)
Phoebe: Give her a key to your apartment.
Phoebe: All right, well I just wanted to say thank you though for diverting Kyles ex.
Phoebe: Thats all right, Ill work here. This is goo, next to this plant. (She picks a place in the lobby next to a plant.)
Ross: Really?! (To Rachel) Hey, yknow what? Since you have such a great sense of what I need, uh ooh, heres-heres 60 bucks, why dont you take Phoebe down to that Colonial flea market of yours and get me some stuff.
Phoebe: How could you not tell Mona that Rachel is living with you?
The Teacher: Right. Are you looking for Jacks parents to discuss the problems hes having with Ben? (Phoebe nods Yes.) Yeah. Because I really do think the parents should sit down and have a conversation.
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe: What stuff?
(Joey follows Phoebe into the kitchen)
Phoebe: Will you excuse us, we need to talk for a moment.
Phoebe: She was acting, she was pretending like she hasnt heard from him on years, but I found this picture on her fridge, and look (shows Monica)! Isnt this what he would look like now?
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving me crazy!
Phoebe: Yeah! Here! (She grabs a deck out of her purse) Oh no, these are the trick deck. Okay. Here yes. Okay.
Phoebe: You know, if you tilt your head to the left, and relax your eyes, it kinda looks like an old potato.
Joey: Maybe that's okay. You know? Maybe, maybe it is better this way? I mean, now, now you can move on. I mean, you've been trying to for so long, maybe now that you're on different continents.. (Looks at Phoebe) Right?
Phoebe: Never mind. But it was going to be really good.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Chandler, and Phoebe are there as Ross enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica and Rachel and Phoebe are planning their respective strategies to break the other pairing. Joey is not amused.
Tim: (walks behind Phoebe) Hi! (And startles her.)
Phoebe: Oh, I thought this was your party and it turns out its a party for Howard. He's just the sweetest little man! (A guest walks up to her.)
Phoebe: Okay, good.
Phoebe: (entering) Oh hey you guys!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Well, whats he like?!
Phoebe: Well hes tall.
Phoebe: This is completely normal, around the fourth month your hormones start going crazy.
Phoebe: He works with food!
Phoebe: Well last night, I met Monicas.
Phoebe: Obviously, and hes British.
Phoebe: (after he's gone) I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. I didn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
Phoebe: Hmm, something bad to tell Rachel Bad news for Rachel, what could that be?!
Phoebe: Oh! Hi!
Phoebe: Umm, Chandler, Monica, this is Don.
Phoebe: (cough talks) Soul mate.
Chandler: (mouths to Phoebe) What?
Don: Thats exactly what I said. Phoebe, isnt that strange.
Phoebe: Okay. Would you rather live in the shirt pocket of a sweaty giant, or inside his shower drain?
Chandler: Buy stamps, pick up dry cleaning Dont let Phoebe in.
Phoebe: Yeah?
PHOEBE: Yeah? Are you sure, really. [She picks up a mirror and sees the white splotches all over her face.]
Monica: (returning) Phoebe, good work.
Phoebe: Dont worry, well find you someone else.
Phoebe: Yeah, I like Vince a lot, y'know? But, its just Jasons so sensitive, y'know? And in the long run, I think sensitive its just better than having just like a really, really, really nice (pause) butt. (Her eyes glaze over thinking about the butt.) (pause) Jason! Definitely Jason! Okay, wish me luck!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Chandler are watching Monica and Don talk.]
Phoebe: Im so sorry.
Phoebe: And then for forgetting to invite you to it.
Chandler: Phoebe thinks you and Don are soul mates, and I dont believe in that kind of stuff. But then you two totally get along. So look, I wont stand in your way if you want to run off with Don and live in a house of cheese.
Joey: Yknow what? Dont worry about it, you still got me and Phoebe.
Eric: (simultaneously as Phoebe) Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! No! No! No!
Phoebe: Ive got friends too. Okay, bye.
Phoebe: Hey, everybody. Happy Thanksgiving!
(Phoebe then gets possessed 'cause she starts speaking in tongues. She speaks Italian to Joey's grandmother. She is quickly exorcised and returns to speaking in English. Of course, too most people English is a strange language as well. But none of them are probably reading this and if they were they wouldn't understand it. So why am I talking about them? I have absolutely no clue. Moving on )
Phoebe: Hey, what's going on Joe?
Phoebe: What the hell is this?! What, did you actually thought it would make me feel better to give me stuff that I cant use for another two months?! This sucks! All right, whats my next present?!
Phoebe: (mouths to Chandler) Soul mate.
Phoebe: (entering) Hello Chandler, lovely day huh? (To Monica) You!
Phoebe: Well, maybe we will. (Starts to walk away.) Oh! (She turns around and the exchange information.)
Phoebe: Oh hello.
Chandler: Oh, I am no women, but that is one tasty dish. (Phoebe walks in.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, minus Ross are playing Madlibs. Phoebe is reading hers.]
Phoebe: Okay! Okay! Okay! (They run into the chapel.)
Phoebe: Ooh, honey. You stink at lying.
Phoebe: No, were gonna paint over the sword, and replace it with a baguette.
Phoebe: Yeah I guess, a little.
Phoebe: Oh stop it.
Phoebe: I-I-I like, I like parties.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: Wow! You do?
Phoebe: He has brown hair.
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Joey: What? No, no, no! No, no... no... no, no... No, too much is changing, okay? First, Phoebe getting married (to Phoebe) Congratulations! (pointing to Monica and Chandler)... and then these two move into a stupid house in the stupid suburbs...
Phoebe: Oh, did the little rich boy have a problem with the butler? Yes, mine's worse!
Monica: Uh well that depends, how are things with Phoebe?
Phoebe: Oh there it is.