words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there. Ross working on crossword puzzle, starts humming theme from The Odd Couple. Chandler joins in, followed by Monica and Phoebe, then the whole gang. Ross starts humming theme from I Dream Of Jeannie.]
(Camera moves to Chandler, Phoebe, Ross, and Joey sitting in living room)
Phoebe: Ooh, this is cool...it says in some parts of the world, people actually eat the placenta. (Joey grimaces)
Phoebe: (softly) Sorry. (Camera pans back to Monica, still on phone)
(Camera pans to Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe in the kitchen)
Phoebe: Woo-hoo, first weekend away together!
Phoebe: Ok, thanks. (assistant leaves, then walks back in)
Paolo: Buon Giorno, Bella Phoebe!
Phoebe: Oh, Paolo, hi, what are you doing here?
Phoebe: Well, Racquela's right, yeah!
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I don't know what you just said, so let's get started.
Phoebe: Um, that's really your decision, I mean, some people prefer, you know, to take off...oh whoops! You're being naked!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe is there.]
(Phoebe enters)
Joey and Chandler: Hey Phoebe!
Phoebe: Fine!
Monica: Phoebe, what's the matter?
Phoebe: Nothing, I'm sorry, I'm just, I'm out of sorts.
Monica: Phoebe, what is it?
Phoebe: All right, you know Paolo?
Phoebe: Well, he made a move on me.
Phoebe: Well, he came in for a massage, and everything was fine until. (A flashback starts Paolo, lying on massage table, moving his hands up Phoebe's legs.)
Phoebe: Oh yeah, I'm sure. (Flashback resumes with Phoebe doing a voiceover.) And all of a sudden his hands weren't the problem anymore. (Flashback continues: Paolo rolls over, Phoebe looks down, then quickly looks up, bites lip, shakes her head)
Phoebe: Oh, boy scouts could have camped under there.
Phoebe: Uma Thurman.
Phoebe: She is gonna hate me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel folding and packing clothes in suitcases as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Are you moving out?
Rachel: No, these aren't all my suitcases. (picks up small blue suitcase and shows to Phoebe) This one's Paolo's.
Phoebe: Um, um, Rachel can we talk for a sec?
Phoebe: Oh! (sits down) Ok, um, ok, um,
Phoebe: Ok, um, (clears throat) we haven't known each other for that long a time, and, um, there are three things that you should know about me. One, my friends are the most important thing in my life, two, I never lie, and three, I make the best oatmeal raisin cookies in the world. (Phoebe opens a tin and offers Rachel a cookie)
Phoebe: Oh, I don't make them a lot because I don't think it's fair to the other cookies
Phoebe: Which proves that I never lie.
Phoebe: Paolo made a pass at me.
Phoebe: Are you okay?
Phoebe: Ok, I've got milk (takes thermos from her bag and starts to pour a cup) Here you go... (Rachel drinks straight from thermos) Oh!(Rachel finishes thermos) Better?
Phoebe: I'm so embarrassed, I'm the one he hit on!
Rachel and Phoebe: I'm so sorry! No I'm sorry! No I'm sorry! No I'm sorry!
Phoebe: No, wait, oh, what are we sorry about?
Phoebe: Such a pig!
Phoebe: Oh he's like a...
Phoebe: ...like a...
Phoebe: Yes, good! Ok...
Phoebe: (raises hand) Oh! I know! (Rachel startled) It's because... he's gorgeous, and he's charming, and when he looks at you...
Phoebe: The end.
Phoebe: Should I not have told you?
(Phoebe scoots her chair over to Rachel and hugs her)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe is telling everyone how it went across the hall as the foosball game continues.]
Phoebe: I think she took it pretty well. You know Paolo's over there right now, so...
Monica: We should get over there and see if she's okay. (switching places with Ross) Just one...second! Score! (Monica scores, high-fives with Ross) Game! Come on. (Monica and Phoebe leave)
Phoebe: Ooh!
(Paolo enters. Ross, Phoebe, and Monica scatter)
Phoebe: Oh, ok bye-bye.
Phoebe: Oh, just look at her... (girls move toward Rachel on the balcony)
Phoebe: You ok?
Phoebe: Yep!
(He happily gestures at Chandler that there was nothing to worry about, then exits. Rachel and Monica are concerned for poor Phoebe, who slides back down next to Ross.)
Phoebe: Ooh! Oh! (She starts to pluck at the air just in front of Ross.)
[Scene: Riff's, Phoebe is entering. Ursula returns with two plates of chicken, but she only has time to set one on the table, when...]
Phoebe: Is he alright?
[Scene: Monicas bedroom, Phoebe is trying to hide the bed from Monica.]
Phoebe: There you go! Oh, you are so lucky! You might actually get to meet Sting tomorrow! Thats why you have kids!
Phoebe: Yeah, well, y'know maybe you just need to try a little harder!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Joey is holding a deck of cards out to Chandler.]
Rachel: So what?! Yknow what? The way I see it(Phoebe pulls out a hair from the back of her head)Ow! Son of a bitch!!
Phoebe: Wow!
Phoebe: What?
Monica: All right, come on guys, lets go! Tie score, and were runnin out of time. Forty-two!! Thirty-eight!! Hike! (the timer sounds as Monica throws the ball to Phoebe.)
Phoebe: Congratulations!
PHOEBE: Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this?
Phoebe: Oh yeahNo, she was really nice to me, but shes in hell for sure.
Phoebe: Yeah... Ogh... Okay, fine. You made your point. Can you please just be Mike Hannigan again?
Phoebe: That is so cruel! Why? Why would a parent name their child Bethel?
Ross: Alright, now, you sure? Phoebe just threw away two jacks because they didn't look happy...
Phoebe: (to Joey): Oh I see, so then, you were lying.
Phoebe: (Automatically) Yeah. Oooh... (she's sprung.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are eating breakfast as Joey enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe are there.]
Phoebe: Ha. Ha, ha.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, no-no-no. I'm fine. I'm okay, but umm, my Grandma sorta died.
PHOEBE: Happy Christmas Eve Eve. [sees Ross's picture frame] Oh my God, where did you get this?
Phoebe: Thank y... (thinks about it)
Rachel: Yeahbut come onListen, Im sorry I dont want to make you uncomfortable, but I told Phoebe that it happened and she doesnt believe me.
Chandler: Santa pants. (Phoebe still doesnt get it.) Santa Clauss pants.
Phoebe and Rachel: Yes, we should. I think we should.
Phoebe: I dont. He got he-he-he-hes hit by a bus.
(Monica runs out to Phoebe, who is in the kitchen)
Phoebe: Look, I feel really bad about how I freaked you out before, so I called the father and asked him to meet you here so you can tell him. Go!
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I learned how to shoot a lay-up, a foul shot, and a twenty-three pointer.
Joey: Uh... Phoebe? Phoebe?
Phoebe: Noooo! Ok, maybe if we just break it down. Ok, let's try at one syllable at a time. Ok? So repeat after me. "je".
Phoebe: Oh, it's like the mother ship is calling you home.
Phoebe: Ooh, wait.. wait, I see a woman.
Phoebe: Ross?
Phoebe: Chandler?
Phoebe: Me too. Rachel.
Phoebe: I'm in.
Phoebe: Ah-ha! Too cocky!
Phoebe: Uh-huh! Ross invited us all to watch.
Phoebe: That's a bird!
Phoebe: That's a bird?
(Monica glares at Phoebe.)
Phoebe: What if we don't find him somebody else? We'll just tell her the date's off, but we don't tell Ross, and he goes to the restaurant and gets stood up!
Phoebe: So good!
Phoebe: No, I-I mean your-your old best friend, here. (hands her the picture) Lily, from high school. Remember?
Phoebe: Rachel, didn't have anything that I liked, so, but she had this Christmas ribbon, and I thought, 'All right, fine I'll be political.'
Monica: Okay, Phoebe, y'know what? That-thats it, thats it, all right? No dinosaurs, no ghosts, no giant dogs, okay? Theyre not the right size, theyre not Victorian, and they just dont go.
Phoebe: (Entering) Hey.
Phoebe: Oh no, how?
Phoebe: Which one?
Phoebe: No, which one? The right or left? 'Cause the left one is lucky...
Monica: Okay, I got it. Phoebe? All right, you pull. I'm gonna spread the legs as wide as I can. (Joey starts giggling.) Joey? Now is not the time!
PHOEBE: Yeah, I met him when I was playing guitar in Washington Square Park. Ryan threw in salt water taffy 'cause he didn't have any change.
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
Phoebe: Or we could just follow your clever jokes any ideas? No! Didnt think so! Okay, cmon guys, show us where the presents are!
Phoebe: Yes, but there isn't always time!
Phoebe: Well, Vince is great, y'know `cause, he's like a guy, guy. Y'know? He's so burly, he's sooo very burly. (giggles)
Phoebe: Fine! Ill call Zurich and move some money around.
Phoebe: Marcel?
Monica: Look, Phoebe!
Phoebe: Marcel?
Phoebe: Oh-my-God!
Phoebe: Oh, exellent. Everyone was so, so nice.
(Phoebe and Chandler enter)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is coaching Chandler on how to break up with Janice.]
Phoebe: Hey! Ooh! How was teaching last night?
Phoebe: I-I-Id love to. Let me just tell my friend.
Monica: (grabbing a bag of Nestle Tollhouse chocolate chips) Phoebe, is this the recipe? (Tosses her the bag.)
Phoebe: Whoah, ooh, why is the air in here so negative?
Phoebe: The most popular Phoebe in tennis is called the overhand Phoebe. And if you win, you must slap your opponent on the Phoebe and say, "Hi, Phoebe!"
Phoebe: Well at Monicas you can eat(Suddenly cracks up.)
Phoebe: No, I didn't tell anybody that I knew you.
Phoebe: Nope.
Phoebe: Why would you leave your Belgian waffle in the hall?
Phoebe: Pat Sajak?
Phoebe: So-so you two were married huh? What happened? You just drift apart?
Phoebe: Okay, they're just talking...
Phoebe: Oh, because, you know... they don't like you.
Phoebe: So, uh, why didn't you say anything?
Phoebe: I thought you knew that.
Phoebe: I can hop. (She hops onto the table)
Phoebe: Dun-dun-duuuur! Sorry.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there. Ross has an icepack to his head.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Phoebe is at the sink and Chandler is looking at a ring brochure.]
Phoebe: Everyone. Except for uh... no everyone.
Dr. Harad: Just-just to clarify, I'm not Fonzie. (Phoebe nods in agreement as he leaves.)
Phoebe: (from outside) Trick or treat! (It�s obviously Halloween eve, the night of her birthday dinner.)
Phoebe: Well, I mean, then what happens if it doesn't work out?
Phoebe: (points at Joey's pen) Uh, uh, gimme. Can you see me operating a drill press?
Phoebe: No! I am a positive person. You are like Santa Clause on Prozac, at Disneyland, getting laid!
Phoebe: Sex in his chair.
Phoebe: Don't feel bad. You know they used to like you a lot. But then you got promoted, and, you know, now you're like "Mr. Boss Man". You know, Mr. Bing. Mr. Bing, "Boss Man Bing".
Phoebe: Where are you going?
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah. They even do you.
Arthur: (To another coworker) Call security. (To Phoebe) Pheebs, didnt you get fired?
Phoebe: The woman who cuts my hair!