words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is stressing out about something.]
Phoebe: I-I cant find anything that I want to eat! Everything I eat makes me nauseous! Im telling you, being pregnant is no piece of cakeooh! Cake! (Chandler shrugs, and Phoebe grimaces.) No.
Phoebe: God! Ooh! What is that smell? Its coming from the bathroom. Ooh! (She goes to the bathroom.)
[Cut to the bathroom, Joey is taking a shower and Phoebe knocks on the door.]
Phoebe: Its me. Its Phoebe. Listen theres something in here I want to eat, what-what smells so good?
Phoebe: (she smells his head) No!
Phoebe: Yes. Yes. Yes. I cant believe it! The baby wants bologna! Maybe he wants me to eat meat? I cant eat meat!
(Phoebe grimaces at the smell.)
(Phoebe enters.)
Phoebe: (angered by the rubbing) Yes! I know! I know! Yeah! So the baby is totally craving meat. This afternoon I tried tricking it, I made it a soy-burger to make it think it was getting meat, yknow? And I got nauseous.
Phoebe: Being pregnant is tough on your tummy.
Phoebe: Thats sweat. You throw up all morning, youll have that glow too.
[Cut to Joey and Phoebe in the kitchen. Phoebe is watching Joey make a sandwich.]
Phoebe: Ooh, yeah. Then what are you going to put on top of that?
Phoebe: Ooh yeah! Then umm, what goes on top of the salami?
Phoebe: Oooh, yeah. Youre a genius.
Phoebe: Oh my God!! The baby just kicked!
(They all stand up and go over to Phoebe to feel the baby, preventing Rachel from kissing Joshua.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, it is later in the party. The Spin the Bottle game is over and Chandler is making a sandwich as Phoebe watches.]
Phoebe: Yknow it doesnt matter how much Im craving it. Yknow why Im never gonna eat meat? Because its murder, cold blooded murder.
(He takes a bite out of the sandwich and as he does so, Phoebe attacks the other end and starts devouring the sandwich.)
Chandler: Theres a Phoebe on my sandwich! (He walks away, giving the sandwich to Phoebe.)
Joey: Phoebe, what-what are you doing?!
Phoebe: I cant help it. I need the meat. The baby needs the meat.
Phoebe: Yeah, totally!
[Cut to later, Phoebe is finishing off her steak.]
Phoebe: Yeah, but at what cost? Six more months, three meals a day, Im gonna eat like, yknow millions of cows.
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Joey, I cant believe you would do that for me.
Rachel: What do you get? (She throws her pom-poms to Joey and Phoebe and performs a cartwheel.) Emily!! (Tries to do another one.) EmilWhoa!! (She falls in Chandlers room.) Okay! So thats me as a cheerleader! Ta-dum! (Gunthers the only one that claps.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, the next day. Phoebe is busy making a sandwich.]
Phoebe: Pastrami.
Phoebe: Hm-mm, corn beef.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Six months.
Phoebe: Not if I get there first.
Phoebe: You're going to Minsk.
Phoebe: Hi, Max!
Phoebe: Are you alright?
Phoebe: Thats so funny to think if youd just done that right after the last contest, no one would have had to move at all.
Phoebe: (waking and startling them) Oh! What what what! ...Hi.
Phoebe: No. (Monica brushes Coma Guy's hair in the other direction) No! No! ...So, um, do you think he's doing any better than he was this morning?
Rachel: (Into microphone) Okay, hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand, Miss Phoebe Buffay. Wooh!
Phoebe: (Dancing in a swirly, Phoebe kind of way) I'm totally getting it!
Phoebe: But lately all the guys I meet seem really nice at first, then they turn out to be the biggest jerks.
(Phoebe and Joey run back out and head towards the street.)
Phoebe: Yeah, except your breasts look kinda small. (Points.)
Phoebe: Do it!
Phoebe: Do it do it do it!
Phoebe: Of course I can! Its just good sense to backup your backup! Look, Ive already lost Chandler!
Phoebe: I can't believe you did that!
Phoebe: We should do something. Whistle.
Monica: Phoebe, what are you doing?
Phoebe: Maybe nobody's tried this.
Phoebe: Yeah, we-we feel kinda responsible.
Phoebe: I know.
PHOEBE: Would you stop already? Get out of the bitter barn and play in the hay.
Phoebe: Oh, see, Jack did love the cow.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Ross is just hanging up the phone as Rachel and Phoebe enter.]
Phoebe: Is it an engagement ring?
Phoebe: Well the Lions technically won, but it was a moral victory for the Green Bay Mermen.
Phoebe: Well, they said that I had to think about it first, but what is there to think about? Im gonna be giving them the greatest gift you can possibly give.
Monica, Joey, and Phoebe: (singing) I'm on top of the world, looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find, is the wonders I've found ever since...
Phoebe: Hey hey hey! She's on!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are at the counter as Ross enters.]
Phoebe: I guess so. (See, the brief possession didn't affect her at all, like we could really tell.)
Phoebe: I'm in.
Phoebe: Oh!
Phoebe: (scared) Fire alarm? (She opens the door to reveal a fireman holding the blanket with the smoke detector.) Oh! Hi, officerfireman, can-can I help you?
Ross: Aww. Thank you, Aunt Phoebe.
Rachel: (pretends to be stunned) Oh! Wi... in the dres... in the dressing room!? Well, that's so weird! Phoebe and I were just trying on clothes in the dressing room. God it's just such a small world!
Phoebe: I have this feeling that something's wrong with it. Something is wrong with the left Philange.
Phoebe: Hi.
Phoebe: Well, can you dance at all?
Phoebe: All right, fine, fine, but if youre my next victim, dont come back as a poltergeist and like suck me into the TV set.
PHOEBE: He's even kind of cute.
Phoebe: Hello.
Phoebe: No, you?
Phoebe: Going to the hospital tonight?
Monica and Phoebe: (in unison) Thanks.
Phoebe: If I let go of my hair, my head will fall off.
Phoebe: Okay. Good-bye, little monkey guy. Alright, I wrote you this poem. Okay, but don't eat it 'till you get on the plane.
Ross: Oh, uh, Phoebe just started a...
Phoebe: All right. If you care enough to make up that load of crap, okay.
PHOEBE: Yeah.
Phoebe: I knooow.
Phoebe: Look at you! How, how do you feel?
Phoebe: Well, we both have.
Phoebe: You're welcome.
Phoebe: What, that's it?
Phoebe: I'm Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: Well, actually it's just from me.
Phoebe: I don't think you mean that.
David: Sorry, I just... I wish there was something I could do, you know? Well, you know Phoebe...
Phoebe: What does that mean? Does he sell it, drink it, or just complain a lot? (Chandler doesn't know.)
Phoebe: Okay, so when youre done with your tea Ill look at your leaves and tell you your fortune.
Phoebe: Does it look like an ashtray?
Phoebe: (Walks up with her guitar) Hey Rach.
Phoebe: Getting so good at that! (She hops on)
Phoebe: Okay, it's in spasm.
(David is feeding Phoebe popcorn. Max walks up)
Phoebe: Woo-hoo, first weekend away together!
Phoebe: I'm sorry, I broke down... I wanted to see him.
PHOEBE: It's a Wonderful Life. Yes I've heard of this.
PHOEBE: Just, you know, long time ago. Well, when men used to tell women what to do - a lot. And then there was suffrage, which is a good thing but is sounds horrible. Do you want to get this tattoo?
Phoebe: And then... your face is bloated?
[Scene: Ross and Carol's, Ross is trying to talk to Carol about what Phoebe told him.]
Phoebe: (to Rachel) I can't believe you tried to move the green ottoman.
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe is there.]
(Phoebe enters)
Phoebe: Fine!
Phoebe: I know no, no, y'know you dont deserve this, you dont Ross. Youre, youre really, youre so good. (kisses him on the cheek)
Monica: Phoebe, what's the matter?
Phoebe: All right, you know Paolo?
Phoebe: Uma Thurman.
Phoebe: Ok well, before you do, I know we weren't supposed to get you going away presents, (she takes something out from her pocket) but I do have something for you.
Phoebe: Hey! Oh, how did baby shopping go?
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Are you moving out?
Phoebe: Um, um, Rachel can we talk for a sec?
Phoebe: Oh! (sits down) Ok, um, ok, um,
PHOEBE: And they were serving franks which is his first name minus the s at the end. And there was a rotisserie with spinning chicken.
Phoebe: Are you okay?
Phoebe: Oh, its a secret. Oh goodie! Yes! We havent done the secret thing in a long time.
Phoebe: Oh he's like a...
Phoebe: ...like a...
Rachel and Phoebe: I'm so sorry! No I'm sorry! No I'm sorry! No I'm sorry!
Phoebe: (shouts after David) Oh! David, get one for us too! Oh, oh, and see if they have a heart-shaped one! And with mirrors on the ceiling!
Phoebe: Such a pig!
Phoebe: Yes, good! Ok...
Phoebe: The end.
Phoebe: Should I not have told you?
Phoebe: Oh thats all right. Im still full from your homemade potato chips.
Phoebe: Oh, ok bye-bye.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is playing "She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not" with the petals of a flower, alternately looking hopeful and annoyed. Phoebe enters, but not as herself, for she has changed the style of her hair and make-up to match that of her twin sister. She hangs up her coat, revealing her new cardigan. Nervously, she smooths out the identifying garment, approaching Joey who sits next to the main sofa.]
Phoebe: Yep!