words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is finishing up a song.]
Phoebe: (screaming, angrily) ...DUMB, DRUNKEN, BITCH!!! (applause) (happily) Thank you, thanks.
Phoebe: Oh my God, you guys are selling the entertainment center?
Phoebe and Rachel: Oh no.
Phoebe: Yeah, I actually dont know...
[Cut to someone entering Central Perk which lets a cat in. The cat then runs over to Phoebes guitar case and starts sniffing around.]
Phoebe: Oh my God! No! Shoo! Kitty! No! No-no-no! Shoo! Come on, you! (goes over and picks up the cat) Come on. Crazy. (looks into the cats eyes) Oh my God.
Phoebe: Nothing. Nothing.
Phoebe: I just, I just have this really strong feeling that this cat is my Mother.
Phoebe: No, no-no, she was a human lady. This is the spirit of my Mom Lily, the one who killed herself.
Phoebe: No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an Oh my God. gesture) Oh, I havent seen this smile in 17 years!
Joey: (to Chandler) Dude, Phoebes mom has got a huge peni...
Phoebe: (is struggling with the cat) Stop it! Stop it! She keeps squirming, trying to get away! Just like when she was alive.
Phoebe: Well, Im not sure. I mean, I guess until she y'know, gets used to the fact that theres y'know, a new mom. Y'know, I think shes worried that y'know, shes gonna, shes gonna be replaced. (to the cat, in a funny voice) Well, thats not gonna happen is it? Noo. (gets up) Okay, I have to return a call in the other room.
Phoebe: Well, Im returning a call from a certain mom at the B-E-A-C-H. I just spelled the wrong word. (goes into Monicas room)
Ross: So, guys, am I crazy, or does Phoebes mom remind anyone of a cat?
Ross: (taking the flyer) Apparently Phoebes mother also goes by the name Julio.
Ross: (holds up a hand) Little girl misses her cat. (hold up the other hand) Crazy lady thinks her mother is in a cat. (gets up) Okay, y'know what, I have to go have dinner with my son, can I trust that when you see Phoebe, you will tell her.
Phoebe: (entering, with Julio) Hi. (sits down in the chair)
Phoebe: Yeah?
Phoebe: So great. Oh, we took a nap today and my Mom fell asleep on my tummy and purred.
Monica: (sliding into Joeys place on the couch to try and talk to Phoebe) Huh? Whatd ya say Joe? Ill be right there. (gets up and joins Joey)
Phoebe: I just feel so, uhh.....
(They both get up and leave Phoebe alone.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Rachel, Phoebe, and Julio are consoling Joey and Chandler.]
Phoebe: Oh yeah, your microwave. The stereo.
Ross: (seeing Phoebe still with cat) You didnt tell her?! (They all kinda shy away.) Okay, fine! Pheebs?
Phoebe: Yeah? (sees Ross) Hi!
Phoebe: Ohh. Um-hmm. But y'know, she choose to find me. I mean, I have to respect her decision. Right?
Phoebe: (she turns around and puts the cat on the entertainment center) Ross, how many parents have you lost?
Phoebe: Okay, then you dont know what it feels like when one of them comes back. Do you? I believe this is my Mother. Even if Im wrong, who cares? Just be a friend. Okay? Be supportive.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: I think she would like that.
Phoebe: Thank you. We both forgive you.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, listen, umm, Mom, I hope you know you still mean a lot to me. And youre welcome to come back anytime.
Phoebe: Come on, Mom, Ill take you home.
Phoebe: Im sorry.
Phoebe: Oh my God, I didnt
Phoebe: (running after him) Wait-wait-wait! Wait!!
Chandler: And hats off to Phoebe. Quite a competitor. (Pause) And might I say your breasts are still showing.
Joey: Hey Gunther, dont let that guy in here anymore! He just said Phoebes a porn star!
Phoebe: Hey Mon umm, if you do get married, can I bring two guests?
Phoebe: Nah-ha!
Phoebe: Isnt it cool! Varoom! Varoom!
Rachel: Fine! Well ask Phoebe.
Phoebe: Oh good, I didn't miss the party.
[Scene: Central Perk, all except Phoebe are there, Ross is telling the gang, minus Rachel whos still being retrained, about the different cookie options.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Really?!
Phoebe: Oh! I knew it! I knew it! I felt really thick this morning.
Phoebe: (to Vince) Well, that couldve been really awkward.
PHOEBE: Chandler, you called Janice! That's how much you wanted to be with someone!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is trying to find out what Phoebe wont tell her.]
Phoebe: All right, so, so you went to Petes...
Phoebe: So Monica, what were you gonna tell us?
Phoebe: No-no-no oh, keep your name, dont take his name.
Phoebe: (disappointed) Oh.
Phoebe: I, but youre so close! No!
[Scene: The Doctors office, Dr. Zane is examining Phoebe as Frank and Alice watch.]
Phoebe: (smiling) I'm sorry. It was just so funny when you started comparing Jane Eyre to Robocop.
PHOEBE: Oh, no no, that side doesn't have one, the paramedics had to cut through it. [Chandler jumps out of the car]
Rachel: This is Bonnie? (to Phoebe) This is Bonnie? (to Bonnie) Youre Bonnie?
Rachel: (to Phoebe) You said she was bald.
Phoebe: Yeah, she was bald, shes not now.
Phoebe: Oh no, Bonnies the best!
Phoebe: Okay, so what do you guys really think of Chandler?
Ross: Okay. (Closes the door.) (To Phoebe) I did divert her and we ended up having a great time! Okay?
Phoebe: Well actually you're the one person I can't tell this too. And the one person I want to the most.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are still talking.]
Phoebe: So Ross, how umm, how did it go with Bonnie?
Monica: (angrily) That is exactly why I do not lend you stuff!! (Rachel looks over at Phoebe in resignation.) Okay?! I mean, first it's my jewelry! And if it's not my jewelry, it's-it's my blue sweater! And if it's not my sweater, it's my sunglasses!
Ross: By the way, the week before your wedding you may not see a lot of me. (She glares at him and he quickly makes his way to Phoebes room.)
Chandler: I always thought having a heart attack was natures way of telling you to die! (Phoebe glares at him.) But youre not gonna die. I mean, you are going to die, but youre not gonna die today. I wish I was dead.
Phoebe: Ohh, thats too bad!
David: In fact, ehm... I going to kiss you now. (David holds Phoebe and wants to kiss her.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!! So I-I mean so in a few months Im going to have three full grown babies just walkin around inside me?! Oh! Oh! And its gonna be one of those log rides where they just come shooting out!
Rachel: Monica, your dad just beeped in, but can you make it quick? Talking to Rome. (Showing off to Phoebe and Chandler) I'm talking to Rome.
Phoebe: Yeah, so please, please, please, dont say anything to Chandler.
Phoebe: Five? Okay, where am I giving birth, a hospital or a big box under the stairs?
Phoebe: Yeah! How would you like it if I sent you to Lee Majors house and told you that he liked you, and you went down there and you found out that he didnt like you? How would you feel?
Joey: I'm gonna say someone I'm gonna have sex with. (the girl leaves and Phoebe goes toward the couch) (to Phoebe) Hey!
Rachel: Phoebe! (goes back to the window)
Phoebe: You said it was okay!
Phoebe: Okay, well you put down the toilet seat.
Phoebe: So?
Phoebe: Well isnt he your friend? Dont you want him to be happy?
Rachel: Phoebe, honey, if you hate it so much, you should walk out there right now and quit! Be true to what you believe in! Honey, you have principles and I so admire that! I don't have any!
Phoebe: Oh...you don't have to go, I have something that will fit you.
Phoebe: Okay, umm, question 2) Umm, did that marriage end A. Happily, B. Medium, or C. In the total abandonment of her and her two children?
Chandler: Oh suddenly, flowers are feminine? < Phoebe comes in>
Phoebe: Y'know what that means?
Phoebe: Whoa!! Thatokay, thats a lot of pressure on me and my uterus. (to Dr. Zane) So, well okay, so is thereis maybe is there something that I can do yknow just to like help make sure I get pregnant?
(Phoebe drives up.)
Phoebe: Why dont you go up there and ask him to step lightly, please?
Phoebe: Oy!!
Phoebe: (at the door) Knock, knock, knock.
Phoebe Sr: Ahh, yes.
Phoebe Sr: Oh.
Phoebe Sr: Uh-huh. Wow! Well, look! Theres Frank. (points to the picture.)
Phoebe: Wow! You guys really dont know anything!
Phoebe: Oh, what? What was it?
Chandler: Well, Phoebe I thought Id(Off Phoebes look)Yeah, what the hell. (Exits with Phoebe.)
Phoebe: (disappointed) Oh, okay. Well, so tell me everything about my parents. Everything.
Phoebe: (happily) Yeah, no, it was great.
Phoebe: I wouldn't bring that up, it would probably just bum him out.
Phoebe: (entering) Oh, hey!
Phoebe: Oh, so, how are we doing?
Monica: (to Phoebe) So whats Phoebe like?
Phoebe: Ohh, I think she knows where my Dad is.
Phoebe: (singing) ...fuchsia and mauvvve. Those are the 66 colours of my bedroommmm. (applause) Thank you, thank you. Ohh, and I invite you to count the colours in your bedroom. (Sees that Phoebe Sr. has entered, and to her) Except for you. You go away.
Phoebe: Okay.
Monica, Joey, and Phoebe: [singing] I'm on top of the world, looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find...
Phoebe: Look, look! (She lifts up the roof, and the front panel falls revealing the interior.)
Phoebe: I don't even have a 'pl'.
Joey: Look weve got to find her. Phoebe just called!! Rachels coming to tell Ross she loves him!!
Phoebe: So, what? Monica, we have the winning ticket! My psychic said I was gonna win, remember?
Phoebe: Have you thought about what you would be giving up? You can't move out of the city, what if you want Chinese food at 5am? Or a fake Rolex that breaks as soon as it rains or an Asian hooker sent right to your door?
Monica: You guys! Do you realize that any minute now, Phoebe can be pregnant?
Phoebe: Well, I made you a candle light dinner in the park.
Phoebe: And that�s Judy over there at the bar with Emma?
Phoebe: Oh, you Americans always butcher the French language.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross and Phoebe have been banished to Ross's place.]
Phoebe: Well I want to get in on this. Hey Mon? I dont think I can help you after all, I didnt realize this game was on.
Phoebe: Well, what period is it from?
Phoebe: Rachel! Come on out! Monica made breakfast!
Phoebe: Im sorry.
Phoebe Sr: What?!
Phoebe Sr: What are you doing here?!
(At that Phoebes eyes open in shock.)
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe Sr: Then don't break in!!
Phoebe: All better! Back to work! Except this clown from research told me I was fired. He should do his research, huh?
Phoebe: Ehh?
Phoebe Sr.: (to Phoebe) Im your mother.
PHOEBE: I can't believe you caved.
Phoebe: YOU DID NOT!!!! Oh! No! You came up with Relaxi Cab! Thats not good.