words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is finishing up a song.]
Phoebe: (screaming, angrily) ...DUMB, DRUNKEN, BITCH!!! (applause) (happily) Thank you, thanks.
Phoebe: Oh my God, you guys are selling the entertainment center?
Phoebe and Rachel: Oh no.
Phoebe: Yeah, I actually dont know...
[Cut to someone entering Central Perk which lets a cat in. The cat then runs over to Phoebes guitar case and starts sniffing around.]
Phoebe: Oh my God! No! Shoo! Kitty! No! No-no-no! Shoo! Come on, you! (goes over and picks up the cat) Come on. Crazy. (looks into the cats eyes) Oh my God.
Phoebe: Nothing. Nothing.
Phoebe: I just, I just have this really strong feeling that this cat is my Mother.
Phoebe: No, no-no, she was a human lady. This is the spirit of my Mom Lily, the one who killed herself.
Phoebe: No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an Oh my God. gesture) Oh, I havent seen this smile in 17 years!
Joey: (to Chandler) Dude, Phoebes mom has got a huge peni...
Phoebe: (is struggling with the cat) Stop it! Stop it! She keeps squirming, trying to get away! Just like when she was alive.
Phoebe: Well, Im not sure. I mean, I guess until she y'know, gets used to the fact that theres y'know, a new mom. Y'know, I think shes worried that y'know, shes gonna, shes gonna be replaced. (to the cat, in a funny voice) Well, thats not gonna happen is it? Noo. (gets up) Okay, I have to return a call in the other room.
Phoebe: Well, Im returning a call from a certain mom at the B-E-A-C-H. I just spelled the wrong word. (goes into Monicas room)
Ross: So, guys, am I crazy, or does Phoebes mom remind anyone of a cat?
Ross: (taking the flyer) Apparently Phoebes mother also goes by the name Julio.
Ross: (holds up a hand) Little girl misses her cat. (hold up the other hand) Crazy lady thinks her mother is in a cat. (gets up) Okay, y'know what, I have to go have dinner with my son, can I trust that when you see Phoebe, you will tell her.
Phoebe: (entering, with Julio) Hi. (sits down in the chair)
Phoebe: Yeah?
Phoebe: So great. Oh, we took a nap today and my Mom fell asleep on my tummy and purred.
Monica: (sliding into Joeys place on the couch to try and talk to Phoebe) Huh? Whatd ya say Joe? Ill be right there. (gets up and joins Joey)
Phoebe: I just feel so, uhh.....
(They both get up and leave Phoebe alone.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Rachel, Phoebe, and Julio are consoling Joey and Chandler.]
Phoebe: Oh yeah, your microwave. The stereo.
Ross: (seeing Phoebe still with cat) You didnt tell her?! (They all kinda shy away.) Okay, fine! Pheebs?
Phoebe: Yeah? (sees Ross) Hi!
Phoebe: Ohh. Um-hmm. But y'know, she choose to find me. I mean, I have to respect her decision. Right?
Phoebe: (she turns around and puts the cat on the entertainment center) Ross, how many parents have you lost?
Phoebe: Okay, then you dont know what it feels like when one of them comes back. Do you? I believe this is my Mother. Even if Im wrong, who cares? Just be a friend. Okay? Be supportive.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: I think she would like that.
Phoebe: Thank you. We both forgive you.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, listen, umm, Mom, I hope you know you still mean a lot to me. And youre welcome to come back anytime.
Phoebe: Come on, Mom, Ill take you home.
Phoebe: Oh, just go. Youre never gonna get it!
Phoebe: you know maybe this is a wake up call, about your whole dating attitude. Your in your thirty's and you've never had a serious relationship and you have never been in a long term relationship, here you go from woman to woman, meaningless experience to meaningless experience never even worrying that it doesn't tern into anything serious.
Rachel: How about you guys? (Points to Phoebe and Joey.)
Phoebe: Oh, I wasnt talking about his karma.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, youre solid. Yeah, youre just no me.
[Flashback to 410 - TOW The Girl From Poughkeepsie] [Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is singing her holiday song.]
Rachel: Well, of course I am! It's not gonna happen to Ross! He's your brother. (To Chandler) He's your old college roommate. Ugh, it was just a matter of time before someone had to leave the group. I just always assumed Phoebe would be the one to go.
Phoebe: This is going to be so much fun! Okay-shhh, I have to finish.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there waiting for Larry.]
Phoebe Sr.: Ill go in a second, I-I just wanted to tell you that there hasnt been a day where I didnt regret giving you up.
Phoebe: No!
Phoebe: Uh-huh!
Rachel: No Phoebe! You cannot get the phone that way; thats not fair! Okay look, I have an idea. Why dont we, why dont we see what kind of number he has on his speed dial, and then from that we can tell who has more in common with him. And then whoever does gets the phone.
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: I hate my regular clothes now! Yknow? I look down and-and I know that this isnt gonna be the most special day of my life.
PHOEBE: Yeah, well me too, yeah. I think that's the challenge.
Phoebe: I know. Its just yknow usually when youre, when youre done with the pregnant thing, yknow, then you get to do the mom thing. Im gonna be yknow, sitting around in my leather pants, drinking Tequila.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Ross, and Monica are there.]
Phoebe: Ooh, this is cool...it says in some parts of the world, people actually eat the placenta. (Joey grimaces)
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Yeah! Okayooh, but are you going to have time to read it?
Phoebe: Exactly! Because it's in the past!
PHOEBE: Yeah. Ok, you don't have to believe me but um, can you think of any unfinished business she might have had, like any reason she'd be hanging around?
Rachel: Phoebe, just the idea of pitting one baby against another, I mean, you know, and judging who's cuter just for a trophy...
STRANGER: Yeah, I'm looking for Phoebe, does she still live here?
Phoebe: Now you know how you really feel about it.
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: Okay, then what happened?
Phoebe: No, but you're questioning my method!
Phoebe: Oh, I get a puppy!!
(The wool-bound trio returns to the table. Rachel has to rush ahead to avoid becoming tangled. Joey brings the shopping bag over to Phoebe, and takes out a nice cardigan.)
Phoebe: He says, that he would cremate my fur coat for free if I umm, y'know, bring in the next person I know who dies.
Phoebe: Yeah no, Im telling you Rachel has such a great eye for this stuff. Ross, yknow if you ever decide you need to redecorateAnd I think that you should. You should, you should ask Rachel to help.
Phoebe: Umm, oh, about three months.
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Well, he stabbed me first!!
Phoebe: What were you doing?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Monica are in pajamas and Monica is making something in the blender as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: They're gonna call her Chandler.
Phoebe: So are you actually gonna see her again?
Joey: Damnit Phoebe!!
Phoebe: Uh-hmm.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Phoebe are on their dates with Sergei and Mischa.]
Monica: (entering) Phoebe? (Phoebe comes back into the living room) Oh, Phoebe, I'm so sorry. Have you been here long?
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Are you serious?!
Phoebe: (still in sexy tone) Oooh, is daddy getting angry? Is daddy gonna spank me?
Phoebe: Ohhh.
Phoebe: Ohh, tough call.
Phoebe: Oh no, I dont believe in Western medicine. No, if you just apply pressure to these points right here. (Shes pinching the bit of skin between her right thumb and forefinger with her left hand.) Then your hand starts to hurt and you still have a headache, so thanks. (Takes the pills.)
Phoebe: Come on! Look where you are!!
(There's a lot of yelling and screaming coming from the hallway, and they get up to look at what's the noise all about. In the hallway, Monica, Chandler, Joey and Phoebe are having another wind-up animal race, yelling and screaming fanatically.)
Phoebe: Are you just repeating what I'm saying?
Phoebe: Oh absolutely yeah! Oh and keep in mind, now, I was carrying triplets so in, yknow, medical terms I was-I was thrice as randy.
Phoebe: Y'know none of my other student thought I was stupid.
Phoebe: Yes, yes I do. God, oh its just perfect! Wow! I bet it has a great story behind it too. Did they tell you anything? Like yknow where it was from or
Phoebe: Yeah, I thought I had one a couple of minutes ago, and now I know that was definitely one.
Phoebe: Ooh! How about Agamemnon?
Phoebe: Hornswoggle? (To Chandler) Ooh, this must be killing you.
Phoebe: (reading Monica's palm) No, 'cause this line is passion, and this is... just a line.
Phoebe: It's Phoebe.
Phoebe: Tomato tart and which of the pastas would you recommend?
Phoebe: No you didn't!
Phoebe: Now, that's trash. Young lady, you can't (The lady ignores her and walks off.) Hey! Stop that young lady, she donated trash!
Monica: Phoebe, you have a, a twig in your hair.
Phoebe: Thanks!
Phoebe: Yeah, welcome.
Phoebe: Really?! What's your name?
Phoebe: You just said
Phoebe: But
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Phoebe: You're Frank Buffay?
Phoebe: That was my dad!
Phoebe: Uh-huh.
Phoebe: Oh my God! You dated someone with a glass eye too?!
Phoebe: I just wish they'd realise they should be together.
Phoebe: My little brothers getting married!!
Phoebe: All right, Ive never been engaged and Ive never really been married, but I can only tell you what my mother told me. Whenever you have doubts or fears or anxieties about a relationship, do not communicate them to your husband.
Phoebe: All right.
Mike: (looks strangely shocked) Excuse me... (he leaves, then Phoebe realizes what she did).
Phoebe: (on the microphone, accidentally) Yes.
(We see the screen where it says: "Mike will you marry me?" and then we see Phoebe and Mike on the screen. Phoebe stands up and kneels in front of Mike.)
Phoebe: Huh?
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Umm, thank you for meeting with me.
Phoebe: Yeah. See? (Quickly shows him.)
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: 17 years ago.
Phoebe: She's dead.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Ross, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are planning Rache's birthday party.]
Phoebe: That's a defense?
Phoebe: This isn't a good deed, you just wanted to get on TV! This is totally selfish.
Phoebe: (catching it) I got it! Mine! (They both hug)
[Scene: The street outside Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are talking and walking.]
Phoebe: CHANDLER AND MONICA!!!!
Phoebe: YOU KNOW?!!!
Rachel: Phoebe!! Phoebe!! It's okay!! It's okay!!
Phoebe: NO! THEY'RE DOING IT!!!
Phoebe: Oh! Oh, I can't believe it! I mean I think it's great! For him. She might be able to do better.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are there talking about Chandler and Monica.]