words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica has hit a writers block as Rachel and Phoebe enter.]
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: Yeah, except your breasts look kinda small. (Points.)
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah! (Monica glares at her.)
Phoebe: Well maybe you dont talk about your feelings back then. Maybe you just say something about yknow all the things that hes taught you. Like (They all try to think about one example and dont succeed.) Or all the things you taught him.
Phoebe: Oh, look, twins. Hi, guys. Oh, cute, cute.
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are on the couch as Joey and Ross enter.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Well lets just say its shes lucky she has a sweet ass, cause shes not so good at the writing.
Phoebe: Well lets just hope it works. Yknow nine out of ten marriages end in divorce?
Ross: Phoebe thats not true.
Phoebe: Yeah, youre right. Hows the Mrs.?
[Cut to Phoebe in Rosss new apartment looking at Monica and Chandler and what theyre about to do in The One Where Everybody Finds Out.]
Phoebe: (looking out the window) Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler! (Starts yelling.) Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey! (Chandler and Monica start taking each other's clothes off.) Ohh!! Ohh! Ahh-ahhh!!
Phoebe: (screaming) Ahhh!! Chandler and Monica!! Chandler and Monica!!
Phoebe: CHANDLER AND MONICA!!!!
Phoebe: OH!! MY EYES!!! MY EYES!!!!
Rachel: Phoebe!! Phoebe!! It's okay!! It's okay!!
Phoebe: NO! THEY'RE DOING IT!!!
Phoebe: YOU KNOW?!!!
Phoebe and Rachel: Ohhh!!!
Ross: Actually, it looks really good. (Turns towards the window and now Phoebe starts jumping to divert his attention.)
Phoebe: (Screaming incoherently.) Get in here!!! (Motions to join her and Rachel.)
[Cut to later in that episode in Central Perk, a meeting with Phoebe, Rachel, and Joey where they discuss Chandler and Monica.]
Phoebe: Okay, so now they know that you know and they don't know that Rachel knows?
Phoebe: Or, we could not tell them we know and have a little fun of our own
[Cut to later in that episode. Rachel and Phoebe are going to a movie from Monica and Chandlers, and as Phoebe walks by Chandler she pinches him on the butt and exits.]
Phoebe: Bye Chandler! (She walks up to him.) (Quietly.) I miss you already. (She pinches his butt.)
[Cut to later in that episode. Monica and Chandler are confronting Joey in his apartment about Phoebes knowledge.]
Chandler: Phoebe knows about us!
Joey: Uhhh, Phoebe and Joey.
[Cut to later in that episode. Phoebe is telling Rachel in Monica and Chandlers that Chandler wants to make a date with Phoebe.]
Phoebe: I'll have to get back to you on that. Okay, bye! (Hangs up.) Oh my God! He wants me to come over and feel his bicep and more!
Phoebe: No!
Phoebe: God, they thought they can mess with us! They're trying to mess with us?! They don't know that we know they know we know! (Joey just shakes his head.) Joey, you can't say anything!
[Cut to later in that episode. Chandler is in his bathroom with Monica, and hes panicking on how far Phoebe is pushing him.]
[Cut to the hallway where Phoebe is conferring with Rachel.]
Phoebe: He's not backing down. He went to get lotion.
Rachel: Joey look, just look at it this way, the sooner Phoebe breaks Chandler the sooner this is all over and out in the open.
Joey: I like that! (To Phoebe) Oh, okay! Show him your bra! He's afraid of bras! Can't work 'em! (He swiftly rips open the front of Phoebe's dress revealing her bra.)
Phoebe: Joey! (Examining the dress.) Wow, you didnt rip off any buttons.
[Cut back to the living room. Chandler slowly exits the bathroom and gets pushed from behind by Monica and sees Phoebe closing the apartment door.]
Phoebe: Umm, not without you, lover. (She slowly walks over to him and is showcasing her bra.) So, this is my bra.
Phoebe: You should be. I'm very bendy. (Pause) I'm gonna kiss you now.
(They move closer to together and Phoebe hesitantly puts her hand on Chandler's hip. He puts his hand on her left hip but then decides to put his hand on her left hip. Phoebe then grabs his butt. Chandler goes for her breast, but stops and puts his hand on her shoulder.)
Phoebe: Ooh.
Phoebe: Here it comes. Our first kiss.
(They slowly and hesitantly move their lips together and kiss gently. Phoebe has her eyes wide open in shock and Chandler is squinting. He finally breaks the kiss after only a short while and pushes Phoebe away.)
Phoebe: And why not?!
Phoebe: You're-you're what?!
Phoebe: I justI thought you guys were doing it, I didn't know you were in love!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Joey and Ross are talking.]
Phoebe: Yknow, youre friends getting married, its gotta change things.
Phoebe: How could it not be? I mean pretty soon theyre gonna be having kids, and then theyre just gonna be hanging out with other couples who have kids. And then maybe theyre gonna have to leave the city to be near a Volvo dealership.
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: Oh!
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: (To Monica) Oh, thats beautiful.
Ross: Phoebe! (They hug.)
Rachel: Hi! (Hugs Phoebe)
Phoebe: You guys are here! Yay!
Phoebe: Ugh!
Phoebe: How do you know about this?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Rachel are there, as Phoebe enters with her date.]
Phoebe: Ohhh!
Phoebe: Kills you?
Monica: Phoebe, you don't eat animals.
Ross: Phoebe! You and I have never played chess!
Phoebe: (quietly) Bye, fat ass.
Monica: Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get in bed, and stay there.
Phoebe: Ugh! No! This is so hard! I went through this whole book (Holds up a book) and found nothing! I want a name thats really like, yknow strong and confident, yknow? Like-like Exxon.
Phoebe: Yeah, uh-huh, there was nothing. (Pause) Can I get some water?
Phoebe: We can't leave now! There was this one baby, Haley, who was favourite to win and she got croup, so she had to stay home! This competition just blew wide open, folks!
Phoebe: Ohh! You made up!
Phoebe: Excuse me. Excuse me! (Mrs. Bukart stops singing) Thanks. Um, clearly this is a very, very hard time for you. Um, but, um, we provided a service, and we deserve to be paid because you ate that service, and, um, we are not leaving here until we're paid every penny. 'Cause you know what, lady? We're part time caterers, and we have no place else to go.
Phoebe: I know. Use it.
Phoebe: Oh, I took Larry there to eat but it was all violated. So we shut it down!
Phoebe: Ohh, get a room.
PHOEBE: Oooh, so so so, did you read the book?
Phoebe: On the touchy.
KEVIN: All right. It's no big deal. BILL: So, she has a boyfriend. What is your situation? RACHEL: Oh, well, it's complicated. I don't actually have a boyfriend.� But um. . . BILL: Then, can I have your number? RACHEL: (pause) I'm sorry, no. BILL: Okay. (They start to walk away.) RACHEL: Oh sure.� (She pulls a business card from her purse and writes on it.) PHOEBE: (Reading the card.) Oh my God, you're giving your real number. BILL: Okay, thanks. I'll give you a call later tonight. RACHEL: Great. BILL: Bye PHOEBE: Bye. (The guys leave.) Wow. So, that's great. You, Bill, Ross, and Emma are going to be so happy together. What were you thinking?
Phoebe: Oh, my new Mom, who-whos a big, fat abandoner! (starts to go upstairs)
Phoebe: Thank you. (To Gunther, who's standing there frozen) Okay, go! Go! Go! (He runs off.) (To Larry) Now, if after dinner you still really need to bust someone, I know a hot dog vendor who picks his nose.
Phoebe: Um, the off-Broadway play people said 'You were pretty but dumb.'
Phoebe: I brought you my old maternity clothes! (Sets a bag on the counter.)
Phoebe: You apologize to the tree right now or I am calling for backup. (The woman calls her bluff.) (Screaming at no one in particular) Backup! Backup!!
Phoebe: Ooh, uh (She grabs her coat and runs out.)
Phoebe: What time? Maybe we can share a cab!
Phoebe: So what do you guys want for an engagement present?
Phoebe: Oh no. No-no-no, dont do that! How could I live with myself if I knew I was depriving the world of your music.
Phoebe: I won! I won! I finally won!
Rachel: No! Phoebe just because I'm alone doesnt mean I wanna walk around naked. I mean, you live alone, you don't walk around naked.
The Security Guard: (To Phoebe) Was it her quarter?
Phoebe: Yeah. Yeah, I'll be alright.
Phoebe: But she just came up here!
[Scene: A Fire House, Phoebe has gone to break up with Vince.]
Phoebe: I justI don't want us to jump into something we're not ready for.
Phoebe: (shocked) Really?!
Phoebe: Okay, maybe it was a trick question. (Plays a few chords) Um, Rachel can we do this now?
Phoebe: Oh my God!Eh! Well
Phoebe: Oh Joey, Im so sorry. You want some of my breakfast?
[Scene: The delivery room, Dr. Harad is back and checking on Phoebe.]
Phoebe: What about my cab?
Phoebe: Oh, come on! I think hes ready to get rid of, what did you call it? The cheap knock-offs and dinosaur junk.
Phoebe: Well you dont.
Phoebe: Oh-oh, thats your thing.
Phoebe: Why are you dressed as a gladiator?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Monica: (to Phoebe) Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about that put cilantro with everything?
PHOEBE: Well, I can't work with people who would do this.
Phoebe: Oh my God, I remember now! We were playing chess!
Phoebe: Sing!!
Phoebe: Wow! Im-Im so happy for you guys. (To Ross) This is so-so, not stupid.
Phoebe: Yeah. And believe me, this suit does not do justice to whats underneath it.
PHOEBE: Oh, some guy she met at the movies.
Phoebe: Oh, okay.
Phoebe: Oh. What's a lurker?
PHOEBE: Ok, I'll walk you out.
Phoebe: Always.
Phoebe: What?!
Rachel: Phoebe, no! This is, this is insane.
Ross: Okay. (Sits down next to Phoebe.) You uh, you wanna hear something weird?
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: Always.
Phoebe: I cant. I cant. She dumped me, I mean I totally trusted her and then one day it was Okay, bye Pheebs gone. Y'know what the saddest part is, when we were playing together, that was like the most fun Ive ever had in like all my lives.
Ross: Okay. (Sits down next to Phoebe.) You uh, you wanna hear something weird?
Phoebe: Ross?!
Phoebe: Sorry, mix up. Hey, how was the movie?
Phoebe: Hey Rach!
Phoebe: Have fun. Oh wait, no, dont! I forgot I am totally against that now.
Chandler and Phoebe: ...in you, my endless (Phoebe goes high pitched, Chandler goes low pitched) love. (they both look at each other.) My endless love. (once again they dont match tones, and they just look at each other)
Phoebe: I dont know, its such a long trip.
Phoebe: Oh my god. This is huge. This is bigger than huge. This is like, all right, what's bigger than huge?
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: No, why?
Phoebe: (gasps) Youre pregnant!
Phoebe: Whoa, what kind of party was this?
Phoebe: I think that uh, yours is a question with many answers.
PHOEBE: [entering the kitchen from the party] That's funny, no. Cadillac, cataract, I get it, no I get it, you stay out there.
Phoebe: Or we could use it to call China. See how those guys are doing.
Phoebe: All right, forget it, nevermind, you can have mine.
Phoebe: What are you, what are you talking about? How did this happen?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, later. Rachel is waitressing, Monica is cooking. Phoebe walks in with Steve (Crystal Duck winner Jon Lovitz).]
Phoebe: (interrupting) Whatever! What about you Meg?
Phoebe: Dance karate?
Phoebe: Well, look, why dont you just, why dont you do your Phase Two strip club thing with us.
Phoebe: (to Chandler) Why? Because she can sing and play guitar and do both at the same time?
Phoebe: Oh, I can't believe you guys lasted a whole year!
Phoebe: Good. (After he leaves, she puts on Joey's gladiator helmet and checks herself out in the mirror) I should really start wearing hats!
Rachel: Phoebe! It's 6 o'clock in the morning! Why aren't you at Gary's?
PHOEBE: Yeah, or you know, you could just wish that I didn't have them now.
Phoebe: Good, but wait. Okay, all right, here we go. Now I want you to relax. Take a deep breath. Clear your mind. (Quickly) Which do you like better peanut butter or egg whites?
Phoebe: (to Joey and Chandler) Okay, bye!
Phoebe: So? Did you get the annulment?
Phoebe: Yeah, complicated cause of the love.
Phoebe: Uh-huh, what?
Phoebe: Oh!
Rachel: Phoebe, honey, wanna get some breakfast?