words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang is there, Phoebe is returning from the bathroom.]
Phoebe: (angrily) Thats like the tenth time Ive peed since Ive been here!
Phoebe: Yeah, oh Im sorry, it must be really hard to hear! I tell ya, its a lot easier having three babies play Bringing in the Noise, Bringing in da Funk on your bladder! Im so sick of being pregnant! The only happiness I get is from a cup of coffee, which of course is decaf, causeOh! Im pregnant!
Phoebe: (starting to cry) Thank you so much.
Phoebe: I havent really had any yet.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
Phoebe: (to her babies) Stop it!
Phoebe: One of the babies is kicking.
Phoebe: Its not kicking me, its kicking one of the other babies. Oh (looks down her dress)! Dont make me come in there!
Phoebe: Hey!! Get your ass back here, Tribbiani!! (Joey walks back in, scared.)
Monica: What Phoebe meant to say was umm, how come youre having a party and were not invited?
Monica: The baby shower for Phoebe!
Phoebe: I cant believe Im gonna have a party! This is so great! (Really excited) A party! (Really, really excited) Yay!! (Suddenly, she starts crying and Rachel moves to comfort her.) I dont know why.
Monica: I know! Phoebe is gonna love dressing them in these!
Rachel: Huh. Except, Phoebes not gonna be the one that gets to dress them.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebes baby shower, she is holding those leather pants, and isnt happy about it.]
Phoebe: What the hell is this?! What, did you actually thought it would make me feel better to give me stuff that I cant use for another two months?! This sucks! All right, whats my next present?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is entering, Monica and Rachel are talking on the couch.]
Phoebe: Hi, guys.
Rachel: Hi! Phoebe. (Both Monica and her try to move out of Phoebes way.)
Monica: Hi Phoebe.
Phoebe: I-I wanted to apologise if Iyknow seemed a tad edgy yesterday at my shower. Yknow its just the hormones, yknow.
Phoebe: Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you, it was just, it was so sweet. (She goes to hug them and they both flinch, thinking that Phoebe is about to attack them.)
Phoebe: Good. Yknowno-no, okay, its-it feels like everythings been about me lately, so whats happening with you?
Phoebe: Oh!
Phoebe: Wow! This reminds me of the time when I was umm, living on the street and this guy offered to buy me food if I slept with him.
Phoebe: Well, lets see, its not. Really, like that. Because, you see that was an actual problem, and uh, yours is just like yknow a bunch of yknow high school crap that nobody really gives yknow
Phoebe: Alrighty, here come the water works. (Rachel starts crying harder.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are cautiously serving Phoebe some tea.]
Monica: Heres your tea Phoebe. (They give it to her and quickly take a step back.)
Phoebe: (sips it) Its so good. (Monica and Rachel breath a sigh of relief.) Oh, thanks.
Phoebe: (sets the cup down) Oh! (Grabs her stomach in pain.)
Phoebe: Oh! No, I-I think I just had a contraction.
Phoebe: Yeah, I thought I had one a couple of minutes ago, and now I know that was definitely one.
Phoebe: No. Its all right; its probably false labour. They said that, that can happen near the end, just somebody get the book.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is recovering from her false labour.]
Phoebe: Well, do you see any babies?
Phoebe: Okay, I guess. I mean I dont know, its just, I guess I know its going to be over soon.
Phoebe: I know. Its just yknow usually when youre, when youre done with the pregnant thing, yknow, then you get to do the mom thing. Im gonna be yknow, sitting around in my leather pants, drinking Tequila.
Phoebe: Okay thats even sadder. Look, I know, I know what I got myself into, its just that now that theyre in me its like, its like I know them yknow, I mean-I mean, its just not gonna be easy when these little babies have to go away.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay.
Rachel: And you just get to be cool Aunt Phoebe!
Phoebe: Cool Aunt Phoebe. I am pretty cool!
Phoebe: They are gonna love me.
Phoebe: Thanks you guys! Again.
Phoebe: Youre the best. Thanks. Oh!
Phoebe: Just kidding. Ahh!
Phoebe: Got cha again, you guys are so easy.
Phoebe: Well its just like youre trying too hard. Always making jokes, yknow, you justYou come off a little needy.
Ross: (taking the flyer) Apparently Phoebes mother also goes by the name Julio.
PHOEBE: Oh.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment.� Rachel and Phoebe enter.)
PHOEBE: (pause) Well, good bye.
PHOEBE: I know.� That was fun.� (She and Mike exit.)
Chandler: The weirdest thing happened at the coffee house, I think, I think Phoebe was hitting on me.
Ross: Phoebe, you cant get out of this! Okay? You have to learn how to ride a bike!
Phoebe: A little mirror that when you look into it you see yourself as an old woman.
[Tag Scene: Central Perk.� Phoebe and Mike are on the sofa.� Ross enters.]
Phoebe: (smiling) Uh-huh.
Phoebe: Oh, I like my job.
Phoebe: Wait-wait-wait-wait! So, explain something to me though, if, if nobody tagged Rachel, then isnt the play still going.
Phoebe: So here is a, a very special holiday song that I wrote for some very important people to me. (singing:)
Phoebe: Well then, you should look with us.
Phoebe: Oh no, we have to!
Phoebe: Ooh, who's it for?
PHOEBE: Ooh, ooh, did you ask Stacy Roth?
(Phoebe looks under the couch)
(Phoebe is outside, taking her cell phone out of her bag and making a call. Joey is inside, and his mobile phone starts ringing).
Phoebe: Ahh, toilet seat covers! Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas?
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Monica, Chandler, and Joey are there as Ross enters with Phoebe.]
Phoebe: Because you are so afraid of commitment! You talk to him, make him scared like you! Make him a man!
Others: (simultaneously) Merry Christmas! (except for Phoebe...)
Phoebe: Come on, you guys, you have nothing to lose, I have everything to lose. Do you want me to lose everything? Everything?!
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, shes cooking as Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: We cant find Chandler (Phoebe sticks her head and motions that they found Chandler)s vest. We cant find Chandlers vest.
Phoebe: All right, Im gonna close my eyes and point to someone, and you, whoever I point has to come up with something fun for us to do, and we have to do it.
Phoebe: All right, all right, well just do our best. Okay? So lets say Im the interviewer and Im meeting you for the first time. Okay. "Hi! Come on in, Im uh, Regina Philange."
[Scene: The Hallway, Phoebe walks up to and knocks on Chandler and Monicas door.]
Phoebe: Yeah, yknow what I noticed Rachel? He scares easy. Is that the kind of guy youd like to take to a ball? "Hey Sebastian, would you like to dance?" (Imitates him.) "Uhh, okayI gotta go!"
Phoebe: Aren't we done with that?
Phoebe: I’m guessing she does.
Phoebe: Well, Im returning a call from a certain mom at the B-E-A-C-H. I just spelled the wrong word. (goes into Monicas room)
Phoebe: Now give me my real gift.
Phoebe: (to Chandler) Thank you.
Monica: Chandler, please dont think I was trying to pressure you. Phoebe and Rachel
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Its me. Its Phoebe. Listen theres something in here I want to eat, what-what smells so good?
Phoebe: Hey Mike, what's the capital of Peru?
Phoebe: Yeah. Youre just gonna knock on his door and change his life forever. Youre like Ed McMahon except without the big check, or the raw sexual magnetism.
Phoebe: What are those?
PHOEBE: I know, yeah. Ok, talk to him. [leaves]
Phoebe: What are you doing?
Phoebe: I don't know, I kinda like Bob for a girl.
Phoebe: To kill Bob??
[Scene: Erics Apartment, hes opening the door to reveal Phoebe.]
[Scene: Phoebe's place, Phoebe and Mike are there]
Phoebe: Hey Mikey
Phoebe: Suzie? (Runs over there to check)
PHOEBE: [singing] Smelly cat, smell-ly cat, what are they feeding you? Everybody.
Phoebe: Oh my god, we killed Bob!
Monica: Okay, while were waiting for these pills to kick in, Im gonna sit you down on the couch. Come on. (Phoebe gets up and goes with her.) Get some nice soft pillows under your head, Im gonna turn the TV on and you can watch whatever you want. And ImSit down(She sits down on the couch)gonna make you some tea. And then, Im gonna rub your feet.
Phoebe: It's okay. Go ahead, ask me out.
Phoebe: Could you-could you umm, give us one second?
Phoebe: No that's just me coughing! (Doing some weird coughing noises and the dog barks again. Phoebe comes out of the room.) Oh, good, there you are! Listen, um, I have a dog in my room.
(Phoebe knocks on the door with the wine and Chandler answers it. Rachel hides next to the door.)
Phoebe: No! Seven rats! I think we should take them home, we need feed them.
Phoebe: No, but it sounds like it was fricken funny...
[Scene: A Mexican Restaurant, Monica, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler and his mom are there.]
Phoebe: No, Im-Im not sure about Hulk, but I like the idea of a name starting with "The."
Phoebe: Mate? They're all brothers and sisters.
[Scene: Phoebe's place, Phoebe and Mike enter]
Rachel: What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again hed make me eat the entire pack.
Phoebe: Sure! I feel so bad for you; I broke my leg once too.
Phoebe: You must think I'm crazy.
Phoebe: Yeah thats true. Yeah, you love her. You always have. You have a child together. There is no right answer.
Phoebe: (relived) Oh, whew, no, that's Bob.
Phoebe: (walks in) Hey
Phoebe: Listen, I think I've left something here.
Phoebe: (realizes) Ooh, maybe that's him!
Phoebe: Well it depends.
Phoebe: I'm a woman!
Phoebe: Wow! Talking about high maintenance
Phoebe: While drinking...
Phoebe: Oh my god.
Phoebe: Well yes Rachel but you got something so beautiful out there
[Scene: The ticket-counter. Ross and Phoebe have their tickets and start looking at the screens in order to find the gate.]
Phoebe: Yeah. Oh! It'll be like I have a wife in the fifties!
PHOEBE: (spotting Rachel's dress) Oooh.� Girl's night out indeed.
Phoebe: (shocked) Oh, well, it's a shame that you-that you miss the movie 'cause we were gonna see, you know, either "Liar, Liar" or "Betrayal", or... "An Affair To Remember".
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are there as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: OK, fine, if it means that much to you I'll get rid of Bob.
Phoebe: (without moving her lips, wearing a fake smile) Okay, I will. (to Rita) This is my husband Crap Bag.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is trying to move off of the couch as Rachel enters.]
(Mike kisses Phoebe)
Phoebe: Hi hi...Oh you have got to sing.
Phoebe: All the time when you're cooking.
Phoebe: Can you totally see through her shirt ?
Ross: (seeing Phoebe still with cat) You didnt tell her?! (They all kinda shy away.) Okay, fine! Pheebs?
Phoebe: I'm... I'm just... I'm the worst person ever. How can I not tell David that I'm seeing Mike?
Phoebe: Every little bit of you!
Phoebe: Yes, she gives the people what they want.
Phoebe: Well thats no way to sell newspapers. Why dont you try, "Extra! Extra! Read all about it!"
Hitchhiker: All right, see ya Pheebs. (Gets out and Phoebe drives away.)
Chandler: Say Ross, when you picture Phoebe living on the street, is she surrounded by the entire cast of Annie?
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: What you got?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Joey is there as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: No, no-no, she was a human lady. This is the spirit of my Mom Lily, the one who killed herself.