words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Mike are on the couch, holding hands, while Phoebe puts milk in her coffee.]
Phoebe: I know! (Phoebe picks up a little packet of sugar, shakes it, and then realises she can't open it with one hand, but doesn't want to let go of Mike's hand. She tries to tear open the packet with one hand.)
Phoebe: Yeah, I kinda do. (Mike lets go of her hand) Well, how's this? (she takes Mike's hand and puts it on her breast, she tears open the sugar and puts it in her coffee. Mike thinks it over and nods appreciative. After that, they hold hands again. Joey now enters, and sees the two sitting on the couch, holding hands.)
Joey: (in a very aaaaahhhhh sweeeeeet voice) Aaahhh, look at you two... holding hands... huh is this getting serious? (Phoebe and Mike, embarrassed, start babbling and look away.) Have you not talked about it yet? (They say nothing now, but smile) Am I making you uncomfortable? (smiles are becoming forced now, and he speaks to Mike) If you were bigger you'd hit me, huh...? Aaaaaahhhhhh (he turns away to the bar)
Phoebe: I'm sorry... I'm sorry. It's obviously way too early for us to be... having that conversation.
Phoebe: (in a flash she answers) Maybe not, is it?
Mike: Okay, when I got divorced, I didn't think I'd feel this way about someone for a really long time... Then again, I didn't think I'd meet someone like you... and... this may be crazy soon, but... I want you to have this... (He tries to get something from his pocket, but it's not that easy... Phoebe looks in a "what's happening" face to him. He finally has found something) No, not... that's gum. (He digs in a little more.) Ooh, five bucks... I love it when that happens, you know... Think no note's there...
Phoebe: (impatient) I know Mike, why don't you keep digging?
Phoebe: Oh, it's a key. To be honest, I think I'd prefer the five dollars.
Phoebe: (really surprised) Oh wow, ooh! Ooh, big step for Phoebe and Mike.
Phoebe: Oh no, I want to.
Mike: Oh, thank God. (he laughs nervously, and Phoebe gets her keychain from her bag.)
Phoebe: Yeah... ooh... wow... Even started to think I'd never meet someone that, you know, I wanted to... do this with. Here you go. (Both Phoebe and Mike look really proud.)
Phoebe: It really is.
Joey: (sitting at his table) Oh, I know it... It is amazing these little things open doors... huh! (mimes opening a door with his own keys, Phoebe looks at him in a "yeah, yeah, yeah" way.)
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. There's a knock on the door, and Phoebe opens it.]
Phoebe: (gasps) Oh my God! David!
Phoebe: (excited) No! It's a great time, come in...! WOW, hi... Oh my gosh! What are you doing here? Are you back from Minsk?
Phoebe: Who cares, it got you here.
Phoebe: Wow. Where is your luggage? (David thinks for a while)
Phoebe: A-Allright, well... I'll call the cab company.
Phoebe: Thank you! God, no! You should see me when... Oh actually, no, I look pretty good.
David: Are... are you kidding? You know, when you don't see someone for a long time, a-a-and you kind of build them up in your head and you start thinking about: Come on, don't be crazy. Nobody is that beautiful, but... well, you are. (Phoebe seems very charmed) Well, so, uhm... are you seeing... anyone? (Phoebe is still up on a cloud from what David just said)
Phoebe: No...
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica sits on the couch and Phoebe is pacing up and down the room.]
Phoebe: I'm... I'm just... I'm the worst person ever. How can I not tell David that I'm seeing Mike?
Phoebe: He said: Are you seeing someone? And I said no...
Phoebe: Yeah! I mean, I don't know. I was just , I was looking, I was looking in his eyes and I was just thinking: Oh my God! It's David. David's here. He's just, he's so irresistible.
Phoebe: Really? Chandler?
Phoebe: Oh.Okay, then it gets worse, 'cause then I told him that I would see him tomorrow night.
Monica: Phoebe!
Phoebe: I know! (points at herself) Evil! And... and... and... I like Mike so much, you know. It's just going really well. Oh my God!
Phoebe: (sarcastically) Uhuh... Yeah...!, you know. And given my life long search for irony, you can imagine how happy I am.
Phoebe: I mean I guess, I just have to... tell David that nothing can happen between us. Unless I don't... You know, complicated moral situation, no right, no wrong...
Phoebe: Okay, I knew I should have had this conversation with Joey.
Phoebe: Hey!
Chandler: So... Oklahoma is a crazy place. You know, they call it the Sooner state. Frankly I'd sooner be in any other state. (Monica looks at Phoebe, who also doesn't know what to say.) And what's with Oklahoma having a pan handle? Can all states have stuff like that? Hey yeah, I'm from the waistband, Wyoming. But when I was seven, we headed over to the crotch.
Chandler: (laughs, but then moves to Phoebe) And don't get me started on the way that people from Tulsa talk.
Phoebe: Okay. (and she walks away)
Monica: Well, he did this bit... You probably had to be there, but it was Liza Minelli locked in our freezer, eating a raw chicken. (Phoebe bursts out in a laugh)
Chandler: (to Phoebe) Were you there?
Phoebe: No, but it sounds like it was fricken funny...
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Phoebe just let David in who brought a bottle of wine.]
Phoebe: Oof...
David: In fact, ehm... I going to kiss you now. (David holds Phoebe and wants to kiss her.)
Phoebe: Oh, wait, wait!
Phoebe: No, no, it's not that. (they go sit on the couch) Uhm... Remember when you asked me if I was seeing someone and I said no? Well, uhm... I am. His ... his name is Mike.
Phoebe: Yeah, I should have told you.
Phoebe: I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Phoebe: I am happy.
Phoebe: Well... but David, just... I just want you to know that... that... you know... telling you this... is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
Phoebe: Of course, yeah.(they hug and Phoebe sighs... a little after that also David sighs and makes his way to the door) You know, a kiss on the cheek wouldn't be totally inappropriate...
Phoebe: I mean... (David kisses Phoebe on the cheek, makes his way to the door and turns around again)
Phoebe: Yeah?
Phoebe: Well, if that's what they do in Minsk... (They kiss 2 on each cheek... and then they pause... David turns to the door) In New York... it's... (and then David grabs her by her neck and kisses her full on the lips... They kiss passionately and cannot seem to stop.)
Phoebe: Hmmm... No, no... No, I can't do this. It's bad.
Phoebe: No, no. No.
Phoebe: Look David, if... if you had never left, then... yeah, we'd probably still be together right now, but... you did leave, and I-I'm with Mike and I really care about him...
Phoebe: (points to David) And you thanks for the face massage. Thank you.
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no... It's not... it's not... i'ts not as bad as it looks... really. I was just saying goodbye to an old friend.
Phoebe: No, uhm... David and I did use to go out... but years ago, and he lives in Minsk. He's only... he's only in town for a couple of days.
Phoebe: No, no...
Phoebe: Oh, well, yeah...
Phoebe: Stop it! Stop it, before someone gets really hurt! (they stop and Phoebe gets David's jacket and gives it to him) Here David, you should just go.
Phoebe: Okay, well... guys?
David: Right... Goodbye Phoebe. (Makes a move to kiss her.)
Phoebe: I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. If you... If you want your key back, I totally understand.
Phoebe: Right! Never! Never! I swear! (They kiss... The door opens and David comes in again.)
Phoebe: You should! How is she?
Phoebe: Remember, a virgin for me please.
Phoebe: You guys, why didnt you tell me you were eloping?
Phoebe: Yeah... And that physique! You must work out all the time...
Phoebe: Oh did youwhat did youdid you work for two days straight?
PHOEBE: I sense these things. It was either but or butter.
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Oh! What is that? What is that?
Joey: And-and you wont blame us for any damage? (Gives Phoebe a thumbs up.)
PHOEBE: Ok so will he be back soon?
Phoebe: Heyooh so, how was Vermont?
Phoebe Sr.: No, Im not done. I-I-I just want you to know that I, the reason I didnt look you up was, well I was afraid that youd react, just well like, the way, the way youre reacting right now, and cant we just, y'know, start from here?
[Cut back to the living room. Chandler slowly exits the bathroom and gets pushed from behind by Monica and sees Phoebe closing the apartment door.]
Phoebe: No its not great. No, shes coming to tell Ross that she loves him.
Phoebe: No, you can't go there! You know how I feel about these "big massage places"! They're putting people like me out of business!
Phoebe: Ohhh, wow.
Phoebe: What?! I thought you were crazy about her!
Phoebe: (laughs) Okay, quit down. (they start to kiss again)
Phoebe: It's a baby chick and duck!
Phoebe: Yep!
Phoebe: (doing the same) I really, really enjoyed it. Very exotic.
Phoebe: Yes, and Im sorry. I-I know things worked out for Chandler and Monica, but thats very rare.
Phoebe: (whispering to Ross) Janice.
Phoebe: Youre kidding! And he plays rugby?! Thats so funny. (Realises) Ohh! I see how you did that. All right.
Phoebe: It's amazing! You better hurry up and fill out an application or I'm gonna beat you to it.
Phoebe: Well, why are you doing this anyway?
Phoebe: Does anyone wanna watch TV?
Phoebe: What are you guys talking about, I loved it! It was soo moving. Oh, plus its just, its so different from the stuff you usually hear.
Phoebe: Hell, Im drunk right now! (They all turn and look at her.) What? I cant have a mimosa with breakfast?! Im on vacation!
Phoebe: Shes right! You have to stop!
Phoebe: Oh, poor baby.
Phoebe: Nope, not knocked up yet.
Phoebe: I dont know, I hardly ever say that about people.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. There should be Gold Man!
Phoebe: (In a strange heavy accent) Hello "ja", it's time for your massage, ja! Put your face in the hole.
Phoebe: Oh. (She goes to work, and her head slowly drops out of view.)
Rachel: Phoebe the father is not here okay? I havent told him yet and I dont think I can tell him at all now!
Phoebe: Im, Im freaking out! Monica kinda trusted me with something and she shouldnt have! All right, I havent lived here in a while, so I have to ask you something. Does Monica still turn on the lights in her bedroom?
Phoebe: God! Ooh! What is that smell? Its coming from the bathroom. Ooh! (She goes to the bathroom.)
Phoebe: This is so cool, til Monica gets back, its like Im head chef and I get to make all the decisions. (She looks at the remaining butter, and then decides to add it to the dish.)
Phoebe: Well, are any of those people here?!
(Phoebe grimaces at the smell.)
Phoebe: Oh, he-he cant talk right now.
Phoebe: All right, wait! Just wait. Everybody just calm down. Okay? Let's give our friend Joey a chance to explain why he's such a big pervert!
(Phoebe enters.)
Rachel: No! No! No! No its not! No its not! Come on! Phoebe, ours is totally different! I mean we dont have the (Looks desperately for something different.) We dont have the that lamp! And-and that screen is yknow, on the other side.
Phoebe: Being pregnant is tough on your tummy.
Phoebe: Thats sweat. You throw up all morning, youll have that glow too.
Mike: Phoebe, I love you. There's no-one else in the world I would ask to marry me... three times. But I wanna take care of you, have babies with you, and grow old with you... Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
Phoebe: Ooh, I cant do this. My mom was right. If I cant-if I cant give him up, then theres no way I can give up a baby. Ohh, God, Frank and Alice are gonna be so crushed. What-what else, what else can I give ema kidney!
Phoebe: I sang. (To Monica) Hah!
Phoebe: We were out of Doritos.
Phoebe: No! Think about it okay? This isnt even my regular job! Okay? And my first day on the job, youre my first call! And-and somebody else mightve hung up on you, but I wouldnt do that because I know about this stuff. My mom killed herself.
Phoebe: (pushing Monica back onto the couch) Its so inspired! Look at him! Look at him go!
(They start singing, and Phoebe covers her mouth at the American part.)
(Phoebe takes a bite and spits it out and screams.)
Phoebe: Who, Josh?
Phoebe: Yeah, totally!
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Yeah.
Joey: Phoebe, what-what are you doing?!
Chandler: Theres a Phoebe on my sandwich! (He walks away, giving the sandwich to Phoebe.)
ROSS: You know, I might have expected this of you Phoebe, but Ryan, you're a military man.
Phoebe: So, I need to write some depressing stuff to go along with my new floozy voice, but nothing that sad has ever really happened to me.
Joey: Hey Monica its Joey. Listen uh, Phoebe and I smell gas comin from your apartment.
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, it's gonna be even worse for you... God... Ross, get ready to do some serious crying.
Phoebe: Oh my God, hes lost it. Hes totally lost it.
Phoebe: Yes, I do! Today is Mike and my one-year anniversary.
Phoebe: Okay.
Monica: Run, Marcel, run! Run, Marcel! (Marcel runs off and Luisa runs after him. Monica goes to check up on Phoebe) Are you okay?
Phoebe: Six months.
Phoebe: Not if I get there first.
PHOEBE: Well you know, you juist, you eat them and you can tell.
Phoebe: Hey, maybe they meant to write, Quiet, bitch.
Phoebe: Because, I'm just, I'm incredibly anal and an unbelievable control freak.
Roy: Ok, ok, ladies! Can I have your attention, please? (pause) Did someone call for the long arm of the law? (He extends his arm from around his crotch and then upward and outward, towards Phoebe) I should warn you, I have a concealed weapon! (Puts his hands over his crotch) I hope you're familiar with the States penal code, ok, ok, enough teasing. Now for some pleasing!
Phoebe: Okay Ive got one for you, if you had too which one would you rather eat, a seeing eye dog or a talking gorilla?
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Then why are you answering? Do you at least know what route were on?
PHOEBE: Oh no, ooh, ooh, did somebody forget to use a coaster?
PHOEBE: I, I don't, I don't understand, how can you be straight? I mean, you're, you're so smart and funny and you throw such great Academy Award parties.
[Scene: A Street, Phoebe is walking with her second date, Jason.]
Monica: (entering) Did I miss it? (Phoebe nods no.) Rachel, I-I want you to know that, if its positive, were gonna
Phoebe: Oh I know, Ive been there. I remember toward the end
Phoebe: Well, yeah.
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Phoebe: I got me some drinks!
Phoebe: What do you know?!
Phoebe: Ooh! Hi!
Phoebe: No, back to happy. Back to happy!
Party Guests: (chanting) Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! (Ross goes to investigate the noise) Howard! Howard! Howard! (They're holding Howard above their heads.) Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! (He sees Phoebe chanting along with them.) Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Yay!!
PHOEBE: Oh yes. Oh and, the part about how they're always like drinking from out pool of inner power, but God forbid we should take a sip.
Phoebe: I'll have one, please. Plus my money.
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: Ohh, Monica, I am so excited for you.
Phoebe: No, just a barrel.
Phoebe: No!
Phoebe: No!
Phoebe: It does! How would you feel if you couldnt share your cooking? Or-or imagine how Ross would feel if he couldnt teach us about dragons.
Phoebe: Hi!