words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Phoebe enters with a paper turkey.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachels dessert is...[about to say bad] so good that I eat all of it. Theres none left for anybody else!
[Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel laugh]
Phoebe: And who else is going to be there?
Phoebe: Yeah, and-and leaving us to go see hot dancer girls is not very Thanksgivingy.
[Time lapse. The gang is sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is at the head of the table, Mr and Mrs Geller are to his right. Joey and Ross are to his left. Monica is serving things. Phoebe is in the living room and Rachel is at the sink.]
[Phoebe walks from the living room to the kitchen and talks quietly to Rachel.]
Phoebe: Rach, Rach, I just remembered. I had a dream about Mr. Geller last night.
Phoebe: Yeah, I dreamt that he saved me from a burning building and he was so brave and so strong! And its making me look at him totally differently. Yknow, I mean he used to be just, yknow Jack Geller Monica and Rosss dad and now hes hes Jack Geller, dream hunk."
[Time lapse. Ross and Joey are cleaning the table while Judy and Phoebe talk by the window. Jack and Chandler are sitting on the couch while Monica sits on the coffee table.]
[Phoebe walks over to talk to Rachel.]
Phoebe: Rachel?
Phoebe: Okay, look at him. Look at those strong hands. Oh what I wouldnt give to be that can of (looks closer to see what Jack is drinking) condensed milk.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Time lapse. Jack is still on the couch, picking his teeth with his feet on the table. Phoebe and Judy are sitting on the table looking at him. Ross and Chandler are sitting by the window talking. Rachel and Joey are in the kitchen fooling with Rachels trifle. Monica walks into the living room from the kitchen.]
Phoebe: Monica, leave him alone!
[Monica gives Phoebe a surprised expression and goes over to Ross and Chandler.]
Rachel: No, I-I live with Phoebe. I mean youre [pity-tone] alone, alone. And I just-its just not the time for us. Im sorry.
Phoebe: So, now, Rach, this is a traditional English trifle, isnt it?
Phoebe: Wow. So then did you make it with beef or Eggplant?
Phoebe: I cant have any. You know I dont eat meat. (Faking dissapointment.) Ohhh no.
[Phoebe gets up and goes into Rachels old room, a smile on her face.]
[Phoebe comes back from Rachels old room.]
Phoebe: Rachel, come here. (Rachel walks over to Phoebe. Chandler sits down on the lounge-chair.) Okay, I was just starting to take my Thanksgiving nap, and I had another dream about Jack.
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, do I wanna hear this?
Phoebe: I dunno, lets see! So, okay, I dreamt that we were gonna get married, and he left, becuz he had to go fight a fire. And, um, so okay, I went to a night club, and I saw him making out with a girl.
Rachel: (humoring Phoebe) Oh my God, he dream-cheated on you!
Phoebe: Yeah, but then Jacques Cousteau came and he kicked his ass for betraying me! It was soo cool! Then, he took me diving and he introduced me to his pet seahorse, who, by the way, was totally coming on to me, and please, that is not gonna happen.
Phoebe: Five minutes ago, a line like that wouldve floored me. Now nothing. Well, not nothing, I am still a woman.
[Rachel and Phoebe walk into the kitchen. Monica comes out of the bathroom and goes over to Ross.]
[Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting at the table, looking at the Geller siblings like theyre weirdos.]
Phoebe: (joining in) I love Jacques Cousteau!
Mrs. Geller: (rubbing her temples) Thats alot of information to get in in thirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werent supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. (Phoebe makes a sad face.) Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
Phoebe: Uh-huh.
Phoebe: Does anyone want the rest of this Pop-Tart?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Phoebe are talking.]
Phoebe: There he is! There he is!
Phoebe: A couple hours.
Phoebe: You'd already broken up.
Phoebe: ...Flame Boy.
Phoebe: Well, the only thing you can do. Sleep with Ralph Lauren.
Rachel: No! No! Phoebe, come on! I dont want to switch! Please come on! I can throw wet paper towels here!
Phoebe: You know, if you want, I'll do it with you.
Rachel: Oh thank god, if Phoebe�s going, can we please take Emma home?
Phoebe: Umm, look we dont, we dont really know each other so it would be really easy to just forget about this, but there seems to be something between us. And I dont know about you but that doesnt happen to me a lot.
Phoebe: Wow, Mike Hannigan...You sure know how to make a girl say "Hell yeah!"
Phoebe: Well, just buy the damn boat! (Shes still working her way through her tray of booze.)
PHOEBE: I'm so sorry honey, but, okay, Rachel gave this guy her number and, um, she doesn't want Ross to answer the phone.� So, you have to intercept all his calls.
Phoebe: (to Rachel) What's the matter? Why so scrunchy?
Phoebe: Are you gonna go over there?
Phoebe: Okay, I think I need to do some shopping. (Gets up and leaves.)
Joey: Oh yeah? (To Phoebe) Hi, Ken Adams, nice to meet you.
Phoebe: Eww, I don't wanna do that.
Phoebe: Ooh. Oh. It looks like, like a tiny little person drowning in your cereal. (Ross gives her this look, like 'Yeah, doesn't it', and gets up to dump it down the drain.)
Phoebe: No! Look-look! Theres the coffee table they stole from us!
Phoebe: Ok, you weren't there.
Phoebe: Yeah, it was really hard.
[Scene: Madison Square Garden. Phoebe and Mike are watching the game. There's cheering, but Phoebe seems distracted.]
Rachel: Yeah, yknow what? Dont look at it. (Realizes the display is their living room) Seriously, dont look at it. (Tries to pull Phoebe away.)
Phoebe: Yes. Yes! Fine! I am someone! You want me to say it? I have doubts! (Pause) I'm sorry! (Puts her head down.)
Phoebe: Hey! It's raining. I don't want to fly in the rain. So
Frank Jr.: Oh, I think you're right. Oh, wow. Phoebe, I don't think I can give one of them up. I mean, you know, they drive me crazy, but they're my babies.
Phoebe: I dont know why I was so nervous about this. And I dont know why Frank and Alice are always complaining. This is so easy.
Ross: Phoebe, are you, are you mad at me, or something? 'Cause if are please, tell me what it is I did!
Monica: Ok, Mike, enough is enough, now you love Phoebe and she loves you, so you need to get over your whole "I never want to get married" thing and step up!
Phoebe: All right.
Phoebe: Chandler, easy, easy. Go to your happy place. La la la la la la la.
Phoebe: Oh, I'd like that.
Phoebe: It's like a gift.
[Scene: A restaurant, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Gary are on a double date. Chandler is yawning.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are in the kitchen, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the living room, and Phoebe is, you guessed it, still on hold.]
Phoebe: Oh! okay. Wait, are we in Joey's imagination?
Monica: Y'know what? You're right Phoebe. You're right. Thank you! (Gets up to find Chandler.)
Phoebe: Based on this play? ...Based on this play!
Phoebe: I got it for your wedding and I ordered it weeks ago, and it finally got here!
[Scene: Central Perk, time lapse. Phoebe is now looking at the covers of two different books.]
Phoebe: Oh, no wonder I don't feel full.
Phoebe: Okay, time to bring up the rest of the cups. (She goes and opens the door to Joey.) Oh, hi Joey!
Phoebe: Ree! Ree! Ree! Ree! Ree!
PHOEBE: And he's going to be paying this woman? Why doesn't he just give her like a throne, and a crown, and like a, you know, gold stick with a ball on top.
Monica: Hey, come on Phoebe, you can understand why this would be weird for me.
Phoebe: Yes. Yes I am. Oh my God, Im gonna have a baby! (Joey and Phoebe hug.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there.]
Phoebe: Yeah, my mom used to put her head in the oven. Well, actually, she only did it the one time. But it was pretty weird.
Phoebe: Yes, when I first met you, you were like, "Blah, blah, blah." I was like, shhh!
Phoebe: - and there's five hundred extra dollars in my account.
Phoebe: God, they thought they can mess with us! They're trying to mess with us?! They don't know that we know they know we know! (Joey just shakes his head.) Joey, you can't say anything!
Phoebe Sr: I really dont think its a very good idea, Phoebe.
Phoebe: Okay. (Hands him a napkin.) So, what are you?
Monica and Phoebe: Shut up!
Rachel: Everybody? Shh, shhh. Uhhh... Central Perk is proud to present the music of Miss Phoebe Buffay.
(Phoebe hides her eyes in shame. Rachel is starring at them wide-eyed and open-mouthed. Joey and Ross are stunned to temporary silence.)
Phoebe: Ok, good! (pause) You guys were so scared! There was no way I was gonna dump this...(a pigeon swoops down, scaring Phoebe who drops the bowl on the street) Oh God, no! (pause) I think I broke your bowl.
[Phoebe turns back around but Rachel is gone. Ross enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
[Cut to Phoebe in another part of the store.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone's sitting on the couch and Phoebe enters.]
PHOEBE: It's not that bad.
Phoebe: Oh, Rachel.
Monica: Phoebe, you get the bear, uhm, Joey, you get the robot, and Chandler and I get the dog. Ok, and the race is going to go (Takes two cups and marks the start and finish lines with them) from here to here. Now the one who comes in last, stays!
Phoebe: Nothing, you just have to be cool with it.
Phoebe: (entering, with Gary) Hey!
[Scene: Monicas childhood bedroom (which has been turned into a gym), Monica is lying on the treadmill as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: All right, we'll se you and Mike at the restaurant in a couple hours.
Phoebe: Yeah. Except for, y'know when youre on a date and youre getting along really great but the guys translator keeps getting in the way.
Phoebe: That doesnt lock does it?
Chandler: Let me see this guy. (Phoebe hands him the picture.) W-H-Wow! Dont show this to Monica! And dont tell her about the W-H-Wow!
[Scene: Monica's apartment, Phoebe is singing.]
Phoebe: About what?
Phoebe: Well, he didn't tell me.
Phoebe: What surprise party?
Phoebe: Yeah, and theyve been coming by all day. They love it!
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Phoebe is talking at the phone, Monica is listening amused.]
Phoebe: Okay, fine! Fine! (Takes the oyster and pretends to eat it while dropping it on the floor) Mmm hmmmmm .
David: Bye Phoebe. (He gets in and the cab drives off. Joey walks up and witnesses that event.)
Phoebe: (in a sexy voice) Oh? (Takes the phone from Rachel.) Hello you.
Joey: Phoebe. Whaddyou think a good stage name for me would be?
Phoebe: Maybe we can like go to a movie or something.
(Phoebe enters.)
Phoebe: Oh hey you guys, I couldn�t get a reservation for the night of my birthday, so we have to do dinner Thursday night instead.
Phoebe: Ohh, they gave me a great spot. Right by Macys. Yeah, they hardly ever give such a good spot to a rookie, but Im the only one who can sing "Merry Christmas" in 25 languages. (She smirks.) I lied.
Phoebe: (walking over) Hey. Ursulas fianc�e is really sweet! Hes a teacher, he does all this volunteer work. Yknow normally yknow, I dont like really sweaty guys. But this one? I could just mop him up!
Phoebe: Well, he wants to do some ecclectic, so he's looking for someone who can, you know, create the entire menu.
Phoebe: Okay, Im sorry. Ill stop.
PHOEBE: Well, I'm not gonna be the only one who's not getting paid.
Phoebe: Yeah, and you have nothing to worry about 'cos they're all crap!
Phoebe: Thanks.
Phoebe: Oh... Milwaukee.
Phoebe: Seriously, what-what's the part?
Phoebe: Yeah, I think so, yeah.
Phoebe: (smiling) You betcha!
Phoebe: Yes, and it is my dying wish to have that ring. See, if Im not buried with that ring then my spirit is going to wander the nether world for all eternity
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Phoebe, Joey, and Rachel are there.]