words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Phoebe enters with a paper turkey.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachels dessert is...[about to say bad] so good that I eat all of it. Theres none left for anybody else!
[Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel laugh]
Phoebe: And who else is going to be there?
Phoebe: Yeah, and-and leaving us to go see hot dancer girls is not very Thanksgivingy.
[Time lapse. The gang is sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is at the head of the table, Mr and Mrs Geller are to his right. Joey and Ross are to his left. Monica is serving things. Phoebe is in the living room and Rachel is at the sink.]
[Phoebe walks from the living room to the kitchen and talks quietly to Rachel.]
Phoebe: Rach, Rach, I just remembered. I had a dream about Mr. Geller last night.
Phoebe: Yeah, I dreamt that he saved me from a burning building and he was so brave and so strong! And its making me look at him totally differently. Yknow, I mean he used to be just, yknow Jack Geller Monica and Rosss dad and now hes hes Jack Geller, dream hunk."
[Time lapse. Ross and Joey are cleaning the table while Judy and Phoebe talk by the window. Jack and Chandler are sitting on the couch while Monica sits on the coffee table.]
[Phoebe walks over to talk to Rachel.]
Phoebe: Rachel?
Phoebe: Okay, look at him. Look at those strong hands. Oh what I wouldnt give to be that can of (looks closer to see what Jack is drinking) condensed milk.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Time lapse. Jack is still on the couch, picking his teeth with his feet on the table. Phoebe and Judy are sitting on the table looking at him. Ross and Chandler are sitting by the window talking. Rachel and Joey are in the kitchen fooling with Rachels trifle. Monica walks into the living room from the kitchen.]
Phoebe: Monica, leave him alone!
[Monica gives Phoebe a surprised expression and goes over to Ross and Chandler.]
Rachel: No, I-I live with Phoebe. I mean youre [pity-tone] alone, alone. And I just-its just not the time for us. Im sorry.
Phoebe: So, now, Rach, this is a traditional English trifle, isnt it?
Phoebe: Wow. So then did you make it with beef or Eggplant?
Phoebe: I cant have any. You know I dont eat meat. (Faking dissapointment.) Ohhh no.
[Phoebe gets up and goes into Rachels old room, a smile on her face.]
[Phoebe comes back from Rachels old room.]
Phoebe: Rachel, come here. (Rachel walks over to Phoebe. Chandler sits down on the lounge-chair.) Okay, I was just starting to take my Thanksgiving nap, and I had another dream about Jack.
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, do I wanna hear this?
Phoebe: I dunno, lets see! So, okay, I dreamt that we were gonna get married, and he left, becuz he had to go fight a fire. And, um, so okay, I went to a night club, and I saw him making out with a girl.
Rachel: (humoring Phoebe) Oh my God, he dream-cheated on you!
Phoebe: Yeah, but then Jacques Cousteau came and he kicked his ass for betraying me! It was soo cool! Then, he took me diving and he introduced me to his pet seahorse, who, by the way, was totally coming on to me, and please, that is not gonna happen.
Phoebe: Five minutes ago, a line like that wouldve floored me. Now nothing. Well, not nothing, I am still a woman.
[Rachel and Phoebe walk into the kitchen. Monica comes out of the bathroom and goes over to Ross.]
[Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting at the table, looking at the Geller siblings like theyre weirdos.]
Phoebe: (joining in) I love Jacques Cousteau!
Mrs. Geller: (rubbing her temples) Thats alot of information to get in in thirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werent supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. (Phoebe makes a sad face.) Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, its later that morning, everybody has gotten up and Ross and Phoebe has joined them for breakfast. Rachel is returning from shopping.]
Phoebe: Lets see. (Looking at the picture) Oh my God! Oh But no! No! You cant-you cant hire him, because thatits not professional. Umm, this is for me (The picture) yes? Thanks. (Puts it in her pocket.)
Phoebe: Please, I think you know why.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is looking at her beeper still in the pot. She takes it out, shakes it, and puts it back in.]
Phoebe: Im just helping the kids!
Guest #1: See ya Phoebe! Oh and hey, thanks for chipping in!
PHOEBE: It's not even that. I used to do my songs because it made me happy, but now it's like, it's just all about the money.
Phoebe: Heh?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is working on a new song.]
Phoebe: You are useless! Freaking out about commitment is the one thing you can do! The one thing! And you can't even do that right! God!
Phoebe: Oh, okay.
Phoebe: So, youre like a zillionaire? (Pete smiles and nods)
Phoebe: Who's day just got better? CHANDLER!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Why do you care about the guy who won the Paris trip?
Phoebe: Oh no! Not that guy! He does look like him though.
Phoebe: Wait a minute. What's his name?
[Cut to Phoebes room, Phoebe has put her helmet on one of her teddy bears and is playing around with it. Ross knocks and pokes his head in the door.]
Phoebe: Good one! Yeah.
Phoebe: What happened?
Phoebe: I wanna see whats in your hand. I wanna see the trash.
Monica: Phoebe, stop writing about us!
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel and Phoebe are sitting at the table as Joey approaches.]
Rachel: Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go running before it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!
Phoebe: (shes strumming something) Yeah? (Joey nods yes.) Okay, I think Ill play it at the wedding.
Phoebe: (Angrily.) Hey, were the hell have you been?!
Phoebe: Yeah. Not looking for dates. (Monica turns in horror.)
[Scene: A Street, Phoebe is walking along with the diplomat (Sergei) and his translator (Mischa).]
Phoebe: Not that often!
Phoebe: I know, theyre gonna be so happy together.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is bringing Phoebe some coffee.]
Phoebe: Me too! So happy for them!
Phoebe: Yeah, do you want to break a dying womans heart?
Monica: (grabs a bag of those Styrofoam peanuts) Ill be coordinator! Oh my God! Im so sorry, I didnt get you anything! Okay, look everybody has to help! Okay? You can help, cant you Phoebe?
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Joey.
Phoebe: Definitely!
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah I got that.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is saying good-bye to her boyfriend Jake at the door to Central Perk.]
Phoebe: Hm-mmm.
Phoebe: Yeah, I locked him years ago!
Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe: Hey, Mon.
[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone exept Phoebe and Chandler is there. Ross's beeper goes off and everyone exept him react.]
Ross: Phoebe.
Rachel: Phoebe?! Wait abut-but she just, she said that Joey was her backup.
Phoebe: I know but its so hard! Nothing rhymes with your stupid name!
[Scene: The casino, Phoebe is playing on a slot machine. Suddenly the lurker sticks her head around the aisle of slot machines.]
Phoebe: Awww! Now you're just my annoying friend Chandler.
Phoebe: Yeah, and maybe that youre a real (She says something in Italian, and it doesnt matter what she said. Its not important so I dont need everyone who speaks Italian telling me what she said.)
Phoebe: All right well lets see, Ross is a good father, but Joey has a boatThis is hard!
Ross: Phoebe, how could you do this to me?!
Rachel: Oh God, Phoebe!
Phoebe: Good!
Phoebe: Well you certainly cant give her that stupid gumball ring.
Phoebe: (reading) Ross!
Phoebe: Yeah absolutely! (They both switch.)
Monica: This is so typical. Y'know, we give, and we give, and we give. And then- we just get nothing back! And then one day, y'know, it's just, you wake up, and "See you around!" Let's go, Phoebe.
Rachel: (To Phoebe) So this is Brooklyn.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is reading a map as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: (Thinks for a moment.) Aw, dammit! (Slams the phone down.)
[Scene: Healing Hands, Inc., Phoebe is giving Rick a massage.]
Rachel: Phoebe, his music could not get any worse. There are rats in the basement that are hanging themselves.
PHOEBE: [singing] Sometimes men love women, sometimes men love men, and then there are bisexuals, though some just say they're kidding themselves. la la-la-la la-la-la-la-la-la-la...
Phoebe: Got it.
Phoebe: Oh no wait no, this is wrong! Ross isnt here!
Monica: Phoebe knows and she's just trying to freak us out! That's the only explanation for it!
Phoebe: Eh, better her than me! Hey, lets bake cookies!
Phoebe: Oh, 19! We thought you said 90!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Thank you Rachel but, look at Monica!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Im talking about massages.
Monica: Phoebe!
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang is there, Phoebe is returning from the bathroom.]
PHOEBE: I can see that. A plate of brownies once told me a limerick.
Phoebe: Yeah! Yeah! Convince her that-that youre scared of commitment! Convince her that youre a little coward!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is in the living room and Phoebe is in her room.]
Phoebe: Okay. (She goes to get ready.)
Rachel: Okay come on Phoebe, its nothing! Monica, come on!
PHOEBE: But, but this is my gig. This is where I play. My, my name is written out there in chalk. You know, you can't just erase chalk.
Phoebe: (coming back out) Hey! Rachel! Come on!!!!
Phoebe: Well yeah, that and Chandlers problem.
Phoebe: Why?!
Phoebe: Would she?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They're still watching TV. Phoebe stands in front of the TV.]
Phoebe: yeah well (pause) yeah you know Emma's birth certificate might say Geller but her eyes say Mookurgee.
Phoebe: Yknow, I dont really their permission.
Phoebe: Maybe just 10 minutes for you.
Phoebe: (singing, angrily)
Phoebe: Oh, so this is all about money! Yknow its bad enough thatOw! Oh, you have got to be kidding!
Phoebe: Yeah, I think I told it wrong. Y'know, we should talk about that because I don't totally understand what happened there.
Phoebe: (singing)
Phoebe: Yknow what Joey left on my pillow?
Phoebe: Oh thank you.
Phoebe: It starts?
[Scene: Phoebes, Frank and her, are sitting on the counh, watching TV]
Phoebe: Oh, we killed them all.
Phoebe: Hey! Ross!
Ross: Phoebe, you said it was urgent!
Phoebe: No-no, we do it every year!
Phoebe: NothingWhy?!