words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are hosting a New Year's party. So the place is crowded and in a shameless promotion for NBC they're watching Jay Leno's coverage of New Year's from Time Square.]
Joey: Ross! Ross! Ross, listen! Who are you kissing at midnight, huh? Rachel or Phoebe?
Ross: Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: So?
Rachel: Oh, good point.
(And with that everyone starts playing tonsil hockey. Chandler with Monica, Ross with Phoebe, and Joey with Rachel.)
Rachel: (To Joey) Happy New Year, Joey!
(Rachel slowly walks away.)
Rachel: But your divorce isn't even final yet.
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Rachel: I don't gossip!
Rachel: Well, maybe sometimes I find out things or I hear something and I pass that information on y'know kinda like a public service, it doesn't mean I'm a gossip. I mean, would you call Ted Kopel a gossip?
Rachel: What? They were like this!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with Rachel.]
Phoebe: Hey everybody, Rachel was so good today. She didn't gossip at all.
Rachel: I didnt! Even when I found out umm, all right, well let's just say I found something out something about someone and let's just say she's gonna keep it. (Goes into her room.)
Rachel: I think they're very nice.
Rachel: Awful, absolutely awful. (Plus other negative comments from Phoebe and Monica.)
Rachel: (entering, singing) "Baddest man in the whole damn town."
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Monica: (on phone) I can't wait to be with you! I'll sneak over as soon as Ross picks up Ben. I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
Chandler: (on phone) Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname? (Rachel is absolutely stunned, she opens her mouth in absolute amazement.)
Rachel: Arghh!! (She quickly hangs up the phone and starts to pace around wondering what to do.)
Rachel: (entering) Joey, do you have a minute?
Rachel: Oh, Joey, I have such a problem!
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Okay. Joey, I have got to tell you something!
Rachel: Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannot tell anyone.
Rachel: Yes! Yes! Yes, you do want to know! This is unbelievable!
Rachel: What? What secrets? You know secrets? What are they?
Rachel: I know, I know! I just can't keep this one in, so I pick up the phone (Joey in a childish attempt to not hear what Rachel is about to say, puts his fingers in his ears and starts to scream loudly. Rachel turns and walks out upon seeing that Joey's not gonna listen, and as she exits Chandler walks in and sees Joey in his current state.)
Rachel: That really is something; that's really cool.
Rachel: Good luck, honey!
Phoebe: Bye! (She exits, leaving Rachel and Joey alone.)
Rachel: Hey, uh, Joey?
Rachel: Remember that big thing I was gonna tell you about?
Joey: Oh, no! (Starts that screaming thing again. Rachel stops him by pulling his fingers out of his ears.)
Rachel: I'm not gonna tell you, but if you found out on your own, that would be okay and then we could talk about it. Right?
Rachel: (quietly) Yeah. Well. (Pause.) Hey uh Joe, would mind going over to Chandler's bedroom and get that book back that he borrowed from me?
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Do you know something?
Rachel: I might know something too.
Rachel: Oh no, I can't tell you until you tell me what you know.
Rachel: Well then I can't tell you what I know.
Rachel: All right, how about I go over there and I will walk into Chandler's bedroom and I will see that thing that I think that I know is actually the thing that I think that I know! (Note: Kudos to Ms. Aniston on the delivery of that line. She said it very quickly and didn't screw up a word. Try it yourself, it ain't that easy.)
Rachel: AND YOU KNOW!!!
Rachel: Chandler and Monica?!! Oh, this is unbelievable!! How long have you known?
Joey and Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Ohhh, yeah, me too.
Rachel: You know we were all alone and he was being really nice to me and, oh and he gave me this scarf...
(Rachel just stands there staring at Joey and Charlie in silence. After a while, Ross turns around and sees them.)
Rachel: Oh no, no-no-no, that's not, not, not, what he is doing. He's just, he's just really romantic.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: (To Monica) Yeah, youre on your own.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Im talking about massages.
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Well thank you, you too.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Hey, do you believe this? Do you believe they are actually getting married?
Rachel: (quietly) Oh, thanks.
Rachel: Ohh
Rachel: Oh, uh, Joanna I was wondering if I could ask you something. Theres an opening for an assistant buyer in Junior Miss
[Scene: The hospital, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are in the waiting room, waiting for Carol and Susan to arrive.]
Rachel: Shake it off.
Rachel: Because, I cant! Ross, I told you, no. I cant.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Uh-hmm, uh-hmm, yeah, yeah, I really liked your hands.
Rachel: Well you uh, you were always really good at the uh, at the uh the stuff.
Rachel: Yeah-yeah, we never had that,
Monica: (entering and interrupting the guys escape attempt) Okay! The movers will be here in 11 hours. Rachel has not packed. Now, everybody has to help! Chandler, were gonna start with
Monica: (To Rachel) Hey! Dont be a baby!
Rachel: Oh it does, it does! It is a room separating apparatus from Colonial times.
Rachel: Ross!! Oh my--ugh!! You kept count?! You are such a loser!
Rachel: Well I
(Rachel heads for the door but is intercepted by the doctor.)
Rachel: No-no! Dont dance for me! Please? Dont! (She gets up to yell at her friends.) What is the matter with you guys?
Rachel: What?
[Scene: A Restaurant, Rachel is still trying to talk up Ross, not to much success.]
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: I dont know. Do-do you have any clothes on?
Rachel: Well, someone that has his own tux, or has the ability to rent a tux.
Rachel: Okay come on Phoebe, its nothing! Monica, come on!
Rachel: Honey I swear it we just kissed.
(Rachel blasts an air horn in his ear.)
Rachel: No!
Rachel: Yeah, dont push it though.
Rachel: No-no, its really not huge.
Phoebe: (coming back out) Hey! Rachel! Come on!!!!
Rachel: Joey, you are not! Youre 31.
Rachel: Come on, Joey, I did it and it was fine.
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: Honey, Monica, this is ridiculous! Look
Rachel: I care!
[Scene: Rachels Old Bedroom, Continued from earlier. Monica enters the room.]
Rachel: (chasing after him) Oh, wait! Sorry, Mr. Paul? Mr. Paul?
Rachel: What?!
Ross: (To Rachel) Hey, heres a thought.
Rachel: Monica, what are you talking about?
Rachel: Oh!!
Rachel: Oh wow. Thatyknow what? That is so unfair. Yknow what? Now I want to steal your thunder! Come on Ross, lets go have sex!
Rachel: Ohh, whoa God! Storage rooms give me the creeps! Monica, come on please hurry up honey! Please?
[Cut to Rachels bedroom.]
Rachel: No, we decided that I would go ahead and set up first, and then my mom would bring Emma to Paris on Sunday.
Rachel: Who is it?
Rachel: Joey! Sit down! (Pulls him down.)
Chandler: Tickets please! (Rachel hands over the tickets) Thats courtside baby!
[The next flashback is from The One After The Superbowl, Part II. Monica and Rachel are fighting over who gets to see Jean-Claude Van Damme.]
Sebastian: Actually, I uh, I gotta get going. (To Rachel) Give me a call sometime.
Rachel: Because! Because I was sad.
Rachel: All right Monica, do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?!
Rachel: No you dont know why!
Ross: (at the door) And uh, Rachel.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Monica. Youve, youve done it right?
Rachel: Yeah, so lets get started on the wedding plans!
Rachel: What are you talking about Pheebs? (Takes out her compact) I don't (She gasps when she looks in the mirror and sees her face.) (To Ross) Oh my God, you drew on me?!
Rachel: Ok, not that you need it but good...GOD!Is that Chase Lassiter?He's straight, right?
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: A cyborg?! Isn't that like a robot?!
Rachel: Aw.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Rachel and Monica are pretty much telling Chandler what the wedding plans are.]
Rachel: What?!
(Rachel enters with the cat, wearing the oven mitt, and startles Phoebe.)
Rachel: Whoa, that Diet Coke just went straight to my head! Woo!
Rachel: No.
Rachel: No Yeah, all the time, constantly. It's terrifying. But you know that I figure it it has to work out.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is on the couch as Ross enters.]
Rachel: (laughs) Well okayWell dont ruin it! Just play along at least!
Rachel: All right honey, we'd better go if we wanna catch that movie.
Rachel: You bought boobs?
Rachel: Whats up, Ross?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Chandler are returning from dinner, Rachel is already there.]
Rachel: Well what happened at dinner?
Monica: Rachel! Rachel! You havent touched Eldads hair!
Rachel: Yeah, I know. I had the greatest day though, I got to sit in on the meeting with the reps from Calvin Klien. I told my boss I liked this line of lingerie, she ordered a ton of it. How was your day?
Rachel: (yelling) So youre gonna be in the car, I will be upstairs, and thats where everybodys gonna be!
Rachel: Ohh! (Whispers.) Really?!
Ross: I dont know Rachel, why?
Rachel: Well what?! How-how much is it?!
Rachel and Monica: Ah, yeah!
Rachel: Oh but look! Thats gonna leave a stain!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are there as Rachel enters and sees Joey sitting there.]
Rachel: Nothing!
Rachel: (quietly) Joey.
Rachel: He's not having an affair!
Rachel: (stands up as well) What?! Me?! What about you and your consummated like bunnies nonsense!
RACHEL: [enters from her room] OK, ready when you are.
Rachel: I dont know. I know I dont work late tomorrow night.
Rachel: Oh, youre welcome a million.