words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are hosting a New Year's party. So the place is crowded and in a shameless promotion for NBC they're watching Jay Leno's coverage of New Year's from Time Square.]
Joey: Ross! Ross! Ross, listen! Who are you kissing at midnight, huh? Rachel or Phoebe?
Ross: Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: So?
Rachel: Oh, good point.
(And with that everyone starts playing tonsil hockey. Chandler with Monica, Ross with Phoebe, and Joey with Rachel.)
Rachel: (To Joey) Happy New Year, Joey!
(Rachel slowly walks away.)
Rachel: But your divorce isn't even final yet.
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Rachel: I don't gossip!
Rachel: Well, maybe sometimes I find out things or I hear something and I pass that information on y'know kinda like a public service, it doesn't mean I'm a gossip. I mean, would you call Ted Kopel a gossip?
Rachel: What? They were like this!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with Rachel.]
Phoebe: Hey everybody, Rachel was so good today. She didn't gossip at all.
Rachel: I didnt! Even when I found out umm, all right, well let's just say I found something out something about someone and let's just say she's gonna keep it. (Goes into her room.)
Rachel: I think they're very nice.
Rachel: Awful, absolutely awful. (Plus other negative comments from Phoebe and Monica.)
Rachel: (entering, singing) "Baddest man in the whole damn town."
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Monica: (on phone) I can't wait to be with you! I'll sneak over as soon as Ross picks up Ben. I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
Chandler: (on phone) Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname? (Rachel is absolutely stunned, she opens her mouth in absolute amazement.)
Rachel: Arghh!! (She quickly hangs up the phone and starts to pace around wondering what to do.)
Rachel: (entering) Joey, do you have a minute?
Rachel: Oh, Joey, I have such a problem!
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Okay. Joey, I have got to tell you something!
Rachel: Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannot tell anyone.
Rachel: Yes! Yes! Yes, you do want to know! This is unbelievable!
Rachel: What? What secrets? You know secrets? What are they?
Rachel: I know, I know! I just can't keep this one in, so I pick up the phone (Joey in a childish attempt to not hear what Rachel is about to say, puts his fingers in his ears and starts to scream loudly. Rachel turns and walks out upon seeing that Joey's not gonna listen, and as she exits Chandler walks in and sees Joey in his current state.)
Rachel: That really is something; that's really cool.
Rachel: Good luck, honey!
Phoebe: Bye! (She exits, leaving Rachel and Joey alone.)
Rachel: Hey, uh, Joey?
Rachel: Remember that big thing I was gonna tell you about?
Joey: Oh, no! (Starts that screaming thing again. Rachel stops him by pulling his fingers out of his ears.)
Rachel: I'm not gonna tell you, but if you found out on your own, that would be okay and then we could talk about it. Right?
Rachel: (quietly) Yeah. Well. (Pause.) Hey uh Joe, would mind going over to Chandler's bedroom and get that book back that he borrowed from me?
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Do you know something?
Rachel: I might know something too.
Rachel: Oh no, I can't tell you until you tell me what you know.
Rachel: Well then I can't tell you what I know.
Rachel: All right, how about I go over there and I will walk into Chandler's bedroom and I will see that thing that I think that I know is actually the thing that I think that I know! (Note: Kudos to Ms. Aniston on the delivery of that line. She said it very quickly and didn't screw up a word. Try it yourself, it ain't that easy.)
Rachel: AND YOU KNOW!!!
Rachel: Chandler and Monica?!! Oh, this is unbelievable!! How long have you known?
Joey and Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Ohhh, yeah, me too.
Rachel: But why, why not?
Rachel: Yeah, I said what was okay when I thought she was some weird bald chick. I mean, y'know, that girl has hair got all over head!
Rachel: (takes a sip from her drink, embarassed) No.
Rachel: Oh yes, of course, I remember him!
Rachel: But that wasn't gonna stop you before!
Rachel: Ok!
Rachel: Ok, I...
Rachel: It's so not a big deal!
Rachel: It's not a big deal!
(He starts chasing her around Rachel a couple of times before she runs into the living room and he tackles her on the couch where he starts tickling her.)
Mike: But Rachel I thought she just had a baby with Ross
Rachel: What?
[Cut to Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are sitting up by the window because two guys have their couch.]
Rachel: I know, I'm her!
Rachel: ooh...
Phoebe: (whispering) Rachel and Joey! It's Rachel and Joey!!!
(Rachel and Joey's)
Joey: Ooh... I can't believe I'm kissing you. I'm kissing Rachel!
Rachel: Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, lets talk about it!! How was she?
Joey: (in a funny voice) Yeah, so it turns out that it wasnt the hair straightener that started the fire. (Rachel prompts him on what to say next.) No-no, it was the candles. Its very not good leaving candles unattended. In fact, one of the first things they teach you in fire school is (Phoebe suddenly enters.) Uhh Uhh Okay. Well, I have to go now. (Phoebe leaves.)
[Time Lapse: Rachel is returning from chasing down the boy in the cape.]
(they rush to the wall to Rachel and Joey's, and we move to that room)
Rachel: Coming! Try under the bed, try under the bed!
[Sequence 4: Ross hikes the ball to Chandler, and the camera pans down to show Rachel standing deep in the end zone, playing with her gum. Something hits her on the head and she looks up to see where it came from.]
Rachel: Okay, I need a, I need a drink! (Makes a beeline for the mini-bar.)
Rachel: Hi...
Rachel: ...I really don't... (looks around again)
Rachel: You would think!
Rachel: Joey!
Phoebe: Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so...(back to Central Perk) ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
Rachel: Sure...
Rachel: Get out!
Rachel: Uh, thank you Phoebe. Umm, well, what struck me most when reading Jane Eyre was uh, how the book was so ahead of its time.
Rachel: No...
Rachel: Yeah...
Rachel: Are they right?
Rachel: (with high pitched voice) Nobody, forget it!
Rachel: Yeah... Yeah, we can wait, we don't have to do anything tonight.
Rachel: Forgotten.
Rachel: Nothing...
(They shake hands, he walks out and shuts the door, then seems to change his mind, moves to open the door, than changes his mind again and leans over the door. Just then, Rachel opens the door)
Rachel: That's right! 'Cause that would give him the control! So now he's all ooh, coming up with this whole I've got a party thing y'know, trying to get me to hint around for an invitation. Blew up in his face, didn't it?
Rachel: Nothing... It's really... It's nothing... Come here, come here...
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is getting Rachels muffin.]
Rachel: Sorry, I just uhm... I can't seem to get Ross out of my head...
[Scene: Rachels outer office, Tag has finished searching his desk and Rachel comes out to try to plant the folder on the desk.]
Rachel: Nooo! (She grabs the phone and Chandler takes her place on the mat.) (On phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh, yeah, no, I know, I-I haven't been using it much. (Listens) Oh, well, thanks, but, I'm okay, really.
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Still nervous?
Rachel: Ugh! Look honey yknow what? I havent told him yet, so until I do I dont think I should tell anybody else.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Suddenly laughing) Oh, god, I am so spoiled... That's it!
Rachel: Oh! That's great!
Rachel: So hi!
Rachel: So you eh, you talked to Joey?
Rachel: Really? Excited?
(Ross walks to the back of the plane, where Rachel is.)
Rachel: Ah... Well, obviously I think so too.
Joey: (sees Rachel) Oh, uh, hey Rach. I uh, I was just coming over here to uh Oh wait, I dont have to lie to you, you dont live here anymore. Uh, Im eating their food. What are you doing?
(Chandler looks dejected. Rachel picks up another gift.)
Rachel: Okay, uhm... alright, here's the deal.
Rachel: What? What is it?
Rachel: Well, yeah... Okay, look it's about me and...
[Scene: In the store. Rachel and Phoebe returning from the changing rooms]
Rachel: Because you took three hundred bottles of shampoo?
Rachel: Uh, look Ross, this really isn't easy.
Rachel: Wow! Well, clearly this is not a good time.
(Rachel runs up cluching an envelope.)
Rachel: Hi!
[Scene: Rachel and Joey's apartment. Joey enters.]
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Yeah, 'cause that's what we do.
Rachel: Seriously, good night!
Rachel: Shhh.
Rachel: We weren't doing anything!
Rachel: Oh, thank God I can't hear a word that you're saying!
Rachel: We feel so terrible about this, Ross.
Joey and Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: No, no, no!
(Rachel looks at him.)
Rachel: Ross, say something. Anything.
Rachel: No, but you know what I mean.
Rachel: Can I ask you a question?
Rachel: Calm ourselves?
Rachel: (now looking up at the ceiling) That is hard to say, Ross. That is hard to say.
Rachel: Well, what would we be doing?
Rachel: Feel me up?
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: Oh, you bet.
Rachel: Okay, well, we brought you some wine.
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Well, maybe the next batch, we could all get some.
Rachel: No awareness.
Monica: Go! I have it in my book. Go! (Rachel leaves and Monica calls Mrs. Green.) (To Phoebe) Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am I the one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.
Rachel: Yeah, you started it! I've got to chill.
Rachel: (speaking to herself and reading Cosmopolitan) Oh, lucky me! Coffee and a live sex show!
Rachel: O-kay!! See what you did, Im gonna be doing it by myself now. Okay?
Rachel: (entering from her bedroom) Well, I just called Joshua
RACHEL: I didn't know you guys hung out.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on her dinner date with Joshua.]
Rachel: Monica, last Saturday night, what happened on Walker: Texas Ranger?