words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are hosting a New Year's party. So the place is crowded and in a shameless promotion for NBC they're watching Jay Leno's coverage of New Year's from Time Square.]
Joey: Ross! Ross! Ross, listen! Who are you kissing at midnight, huh? Rachel or Phoebe?
Ross: Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: So?
Rachel: Oh, good point.
(And with that everyone starts playing tonsil hockey. Chandler with Monica, Ross with Phoebe, and Joey with Rachel.)
Rachel: (To Joey) Happy New Year, Joey!
(Rachel slowly walks away.)
Rachel: But your divorce isn't even final yet.
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Rachel: I don't gossip!
Rachel: Well, maybe sometimes I find out things or I hear something and I pass that information on y'know kinda like a public service, it doesn't mean I'm a gossip. I mean, would you call Ted Kopel a gossip?
Rachel: What? They were like this!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with Rachel.]
Phoebe: Hey everybody, Rachel was so good today. She didn't gossip at all.
Rachel: I didnt! Even when I found out umm, all right, well let's just say I found something out something about someone and let's just say she's gonna keep it. (Goes into her room.)
Rachel: I think they're very nice.
Rachel: Awful, absolutely awful. (Plus other negative comments from Phoebe and Monica.)
Rachel: (entering, singing) "Baddest man in the whole damn town."
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Monica: (on phone) I can't wait to be with you! I'll sneak over as soon as Ross picks up Ben. I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
Chandler: (on phone) Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname? (Rachel is absolutely stunned, she opens her mouth in absolute amazement.)
Rachel: Arghh!! (She quickly hangs up the phone and starts to pace around wondering what to do.)
Rachel: (entering) Joey, do you have a minute?
Rachel: Oh, Joey, I have such a problem!
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Okay. Joey, I have got to tell you something!
Rachel: Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannot tell anyone.
Rachel: Yes! Yes! Yes, you do want to know! This is unbelievable!
Rachel: What? What secrets? You know secrets? What are they?
Rachel: I know, I know! I just can't keep this one in, so I pick up the phone (Joey in a childish attempt to not hear what Rachel is about to say, puts his fingers in his ears and starts to scream loudly. Rachel turns and walks out upon seeing that Joey's not gonna listen, and as she exits Chandler walks in and sees Joey in his current state.)
Rachel: That really is something; that's really cool.
Rachel: Good luck, honey!
Phoebe: Bye! (She exits, leaving Rachel and Joey alone.)
Rachel: Hey, uh, Joey?
Rachel: Remember that big thing I was gonna tell you about?
Joey: Oh, no! (Starts that screaming thing again. Rachel stops him by pulling his fingers out of his ears.)
Rachel: I'm not gonna tell you, but if you found out on your own, that would be okay and then we could talk about it. Right?
Rachel: (quietly) Yeah. Well. (Pause.) Hey uh Joe, would mind going over to Chandler's bedroom and get that book back that he borrowed from me?
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Do you know something?
Rachel: I might know something too.
Rachel: Oh no, I can't tell you until you tell me what you know.
Rachel: Well then I can't tell you what I know.
Rachel: All right, how about I go over there and I will walk into Chandler's bedroom and I will see that thing that I think that I know is actually the thing that I think that I know! (Note: Kudos to Ms. Aniston on the delivery of that line. She said it very quickly and didn't screw up a word. Try it yourself, it ain't that easy.)
Rachel: AND YOU KNOW!!!
Rachel: Chandler and Monica?!! Oh, this is unbelievable!! How long have you known?
Joey and Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Ohhh, yeah, me too.
Phoebe: Okay Rachel, I cant wait to live with you! And you know what we should do? Bring Monica and then we could all live there together! Well have so much fun!!
Rachel: Ohh! And Im one of them!! Wow! Oh, I just cannot believe this! I mean, Joey Tribbiani!
Rachel: What?! Why?!
Ross: Of course! It all adds up! I mean you youre obsessed with her. Its always, "Ross, what are you gonna do about Rachel?" "Ross, why-why are you moving in with Rachel?" "When are you gonna confess your secret marriage to Rachel?" You want her!
Rachel: It's not a purse! It's a shoulder bag.
Rachel: Well honey, Im late for a meeting. So can you just make it quick?
Ross: Yeah, sure, right! Like I've ever been in Rachel Green's room.
[Rachel closes the drapes over the window, goes into her bedroom and closes the door.]
Big Nosed Rachel: Well, you know that my parents are out of town and Chip was going to come over
Rachel: Oh. Listen, I'm so sorry. I would, I would've never fogged you if y'know if you hadn't looked so . Y'know.
Rachel: I know!
Rachel: Wh-what?!
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: No-no, I bought those.
Rachel: O-okay!
Rachel: Hi.
Rachel: Oh! What a great way to earn some extra pocket money.
Rachel: Yeah. (Rachel walks away.)
[Scene: The Launderama. Rachel is sorting her now-pink clothes.]
Rachel: (to Ross): So basically, you get your ya-yas by taking money from all of your friends.
Rachel: And that crazy party animal will be your brother-in-law.
[Cut to Ross's apartment. Ross and Rachel are there. It's another scene from 1016 TOW Rachel's Going Away Party.]
Rachel: No!
Rachel: Thanks Chandler.
Rachel: Mon you definitely have to make it a theme wedding, and the theme could be, Look how much money weve got! Y'know, I mean you could put, you could put money in-in the invitations! You-you could have like little money place settings. And ah, you could start with a money salad! I mean itll be dry, but people will like it.
Rachel: Ive got some bad news.
Rachel: Wow, oh my God, our child will be beaten to death in the schoolyard.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: What?
Mr. Zelner: Hi Rachel!
Rachel: Thank you.
Rachel: Excuse me?
Rachel: (Running back out the door with her passport.) Bye, Pheebs.
Rachel: Oh, okay! (She goes to answer the door.)
Rachel: Okay uh, but before you do that. I-I, I need you to talk to me.
Rachel: Pheebs, I have to ask you
Rachel: Whoa! (Laughs) Y'know what Katie? I gotta tell ya I-I-I-I think you are the one who is too much. (She punches Katie back.)
Rachel: (to Monica) Ok, ok, ok. How did this happen to me? How did this happen to me? A week ago, two weeks ago, I was fine. Ross was just Ross, just this guy. Now he's Rrrooossss, oh, this really great guy that I can't have.
Rachel: Come on Ross give me the keys! Monica does not know what shes talking about! I am an excellent driver!
Rachel: Youre just staring into space.
Rachel: Alright-y then.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the phone rings and Monica answers it as Rachel and Phoebe move a box into the living room.]
(Rachel runs into the airport, trying to catch Ross, moving people out of the way.)
Rachel: Oh wow, you didnt even try to unhook my bra!
Rachel: This one? (Picks it up.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Ross and Rachel are entering with the rest of the gang already inside.]
Rachel: Oh Ross, honey you gotta stop torturing yourself!
[Scene: A beauty parlour, Rachel is getting a manicure while Chandler, yes Chandler, is getting a petticure (Does that scare you that I know those terms? Well, it scares me.).]
Rachel: Pheebs, this whole apartment thing is just a nightmare! Every place I can afford comes with a roommate who is a freak. I mean, look at this; (Points to one and starts to read it.) "Wanted. Female roommate, non-smoker, non-ugly." Its just, there is nothing! The citys full!
Rachel: Okay guys, way to wish me luck!
[Scene: Bloomingdale's, Rachel is fixing Joey up with some new clothes.]
Rachel: All right, you know what? I am not leaving here, until you call that plane back!! (She pounds her hand on the counter twice. The ticket agent counters by placing the closed sign on the counter and tapping it twice.)
Rachel: Hi, Im sorry Im late but I am ready, ready to talk you up! When does Lizs father get here?
Rachel: Hi. What are you doing here? Isn't this against the rules?
Rachel: A mistake?! What were you trying to put it in? Her purse?!
(Ross and Rachel look into each others eyes and kiss.)
Kim: (at the door) Rachel? Do you smoke?
Rachel: Chandler, theres a guy right over there. (Points to the counter)
Amy: This might be my one chance to have a baby Rachel. I mean, you know that I have been so busy focusing on my carrer.
Monica: Rachel, you can go down there, you don't have to smoke. Just say you wanna get some fresh air.
Rachel: (angrily) GIVE ME THE BOOK! (she takes it and start reading) Pablo Diaz, Brady Smith, huh, "Guy-in-van"?
Rachel: Yeah, I can do that.
Rachel: No! No! No! Im not yelling at you, Im just yelling near you. Oh God Joey, ohh Im my father. Oh my God, this is horrible! Ive been trying so hard not to be my mother I did not see this comin. Oh, Joey, Im sorry. Im so sorry. I just wanted you to learn.
Rachel: Oh great!
Rachel: Oh that's okay.
Phoebe: No! No, we have an emergency. Okay? Rachels coming to London.
Rachel: Oh, me too.
Rachel: (Laughs) Oh, me too.
Frank: Yeah, I love you. Okay, bye! (To Rachel) Hi!
Rachel: No. But I was showing him some cufflinks and I felt his pulse.
Monica: (To Rachel) How did work go?
Rachel: Thanks!
Rachel: I did not!
(The phone rings and Rachel answers it.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is greeting her Father for their brunch.]
Rachel: Well no, I dont smell anything.
(Rachel starts going through her mail, and come across her invitation.)
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: Please, Ross, you-you got hurt playing badminton with my dad.
Rachel: Ross, things aren't gonna be weird between us, right? I mean was that just the stupidest thing, me telling you that?
Rachel: Yeah! Why?
Rachel: Yknow I cant even worry about that right now, cause I got the cutie little baby, oh I cant believe how much I love her, I cant get enough of her, like right now I miss her. I actually miss her.
Rachel: And with Chandler in the next room. What are you, what are you sick?
Chandler: Yes! (Rachel walks towards door) You're never gonna make it!
Rachel: Hey! Hey-hey-hey!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Phoebe is watching a Spanish version of The Waltons. At a nearby table sit Monica knitting, Rachel winding a ball of wool, and Chandler supplying them both from a skein which is spread between his hands.]
Rachel: (hearing that) Oh man!
Joey: Rach?! (He walks over to the fridge to put it in, but it cannot be opened either) Rachel!!!!? (He walks to the bathroom and tries to lift the toilet seat cover. It won't come up.) So I can't do anything I like????
Rachel: Okay. (Starts to walk away.)
(Rachel enters.)
Rachel: It wouldn't have mattered anyway, Phoebe, you and I are, are gonna live together, we're roommates; that's the deal.
Rachel: Why, how much is this gonna cost?
Rachel: Oh, okay, not so weird.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, Im not, Im not hungry.
Rachel: Im fine! Im fine! Im just losing a tooth, its no big deal. I have a dentist! Yknow. Im gonna go put some ice on it. Excuse me. (She goes over to the ice and Joey and Monica follow her.) What do I do now? What do I do now?
(Joey starts wiping lint off of her back, but goes at little too far and Rachel just glares at him. He stops, gives her the okay symbol and walks away.)
Rachel: I would love to!
Rachel: Come on, I don't really want to be doing this right now. I am carrying a very heavy couch.
Rachel: Yeah, sure. Umm, they didnt have poppy seed bagels, so I (Enters Joannas office and sees her handcuffed to her chair wearing nothing but a slip) Oh my word!
RACHEL: Wow. Is it, is it 'cause she's so cold in bed. Or, or is it 'cause she's like, kinda bossy, makes it feel like school?