words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Phoebe, Rachel and Monica are there. Ross walks in with a magazine in his hand.]
(Rachel is looking at the magazine and laughing.)
Rachel: Im sorry, I was just reading the joke below it. Man, that one is funny. (Ross grabs the magazine away from her.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Rachel are on the couch looking at the Playboy magazine. When they hear someone coming, Monica goes to hide it under the sofa cushions.]
Rachel: We are looking at a Playboy.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure. I mean, like in the case of this young woman, she has lost her clothes, so she rides naked on the horse, shes crying out, Where are they, where are they?
Rachel and Monica: Yeah.
Rachel: You see, now, I would date this girl. Shes cute, shes outdoorsy, you know, and she knows how to build a fire. I mean, thats got to come in handy
Rachel: (thinks) I dont know.
Phoebe: Rachel.
Gunther: Okay, but the moneys good, plus you get to stare at Rachel as much as you want.
Monica: (visibly upset) She picked Rachel. I mean, she tried to back out of it, but it was obvious. She picked Rachel.
Monica: Its wrong. You know what else is wrong? Phoebe picking Rachel.
Chandler: You know who else picked Rachel? Ross, and you know what else Ross did? He stole my joke. You know what? Im going to get a joke journal. Yknow? And document the date and time of every single one of my jokes.
Chandler: Picking Rachel.
[Scene, Phoebe and Rachels, theyre sitting together on the couch.]
Phoebe and Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: Monica, what are you doing?
Monica: (laughing harder) Nothing, Im just trying to recreate some of the fun that we had at my place the other day. (To Phoebe) Remember, when you picked Rachel over me? That was funny.
Phoebe: Fine. The reason that I was leaning a little bit more toward Rachel than you is just that youre just kinda high maintenanceOkay lets go to lunch!
Phoebe: No, okay, youre right. Youre easy-going. Youre just not as easy-going as Rachel. Shes just more flexible and-and mellow. Thats all.
Rachel: (To Monica) Well, people are different.
Phoebe: Ya, you know, Rachel shell do whatever you want. Yknow, you can just walk all over her.
Rachel: What? Wait a minute. What are you saying, that Im a pushover? Im not a pushover.
Rachel: Oh my you think Im a pushover. Well wait, watch this, you know what? Youre not invited to lunch. What do you think of that? I think thats pretty strong, thats what I think. Come on, Monica, lets go to lunch. (She leaves)
Rachel: I cannot believe her.
Rachel: Oh, oh, I love that Japanese place.
Rachel: All right, wherever you wanna go is cool.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, and Chandler are there as Ross enters and sees Gunther.]
Joey: Sure. (To Monica and Rachel) Coffee? Cause Im going up there.
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Joey, honey, I dont think youre supposed to go back there.
Rachel: Come on, Joey, I did it and it was fine.
Rachel: Well, you know what? This is great. Finally, I have someone I can pass on my wisdom too. Let me tell you about a couple of things I learned while working at the coffeehouse. First of all, the customer is always right. (Joey nods.) A smile goes a long way. (Joey smiles) And if anyone is ever rude to you? Sneeze muffin.
(He looks at Rachel and winks, she gives him the thumbs-up sign.)
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachels, Phoebe is sitting on the couch as Rachel and Monica enter.]
Rachel: Phoebe. We would like to talk to you for a second.
Monica: So, maybe I am a little high maintenance. And maybe Rachel is a little bit of a pushover. But you know what we decided you are?
Rachel: Yes, we are very sorry to tell you this, but you, Phoebe, are flaky.
Rachel: So, what, youre just, youre just okay with being flaky?
Rachel: Yeah, and I am okay with being a pushover.
Rachel: I am not a pushover!
Monica and Rachel: You did!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is sitting at a table and Phoebe is on the couch. Chandler and Monica can be seen outside, shes lecturing him, and pushes him inside. He then nods to Rachel, and is obviously counting off the seconds in his head and then Monica makes a grand enterance.]
Monica: Hey, its Phoebe and Rachel. Um, why dont you tell them what you were telling me earlier about me not being high maintenance?
(Rachel and Phoebe exchange looks.)
Rachel: Wow, you know what? That is the best fake speech I think Ive ever heard.
Monica: (embarrassed) (To Phoebe and Rachel) I didnt even tell him to say that. (They hug). All right youre off my list.
Rachel: How-how did you lose your job here?
Rachel: He left work in the middle of the day to do a personal errand and left you in charge when youve been working here two days? Thats not, thats not right.
Rachel: Joey, you cant let him get away with that. Ya know what, Im not going to let him get away with that. Im going to say something to himNo, I really shouldnt say anythingNo, I should say something to him. (Goes to the counter) Gunther, I want you to give Joey his job back. That is really not fair that you have to fire him
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Thats right, he can have his job back. Im glad we got that all straightened out. There you go, Joey, you got your job back.
Rachel: Yeah, pretty nice, huh? Now whos a pushover?
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry. (Gets up and moves.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting at the kitchen table, talking.]
Rachel: Oh, yeah. Definitely you, Pheebs.
(Phoebe gets up from the table, and while her back is turned, Rachel and Monica indicate via sign language that they each would have picked the other.)
Rachel: Hey. Oh, I have a question. If-if-if one of you had to pick one of the other two guys to go out with, who would you pick?
[Scene: The casino, Ross and Rachel are entering.]
(A young boy sees Rachel, points, and starts laughing.)
Rachel: Hi! (Hugs Phoebe)
Rachel: Well excuse me, my fashion-impaired friends, I am here to tell you that hats are back.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Rachel are there, as Phoebe enters with her date.]
Rachel: Hi!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is working as Monica enters.]
RACHEL: And she's not crazy?
Rachel: Oh, umm, I was just yknow working out and umm Oh, thats it.
Rachel: Well, Ross, we were worried about you. We didn't know how you were going to react.
Rachel: What?! What else did he say?
Rachel: What's the big deal? Why don't you wanna see Janice?
Rachel: Hm-mmm! (Opens the container)
Rachel: Oh boy, I just can't watch. It's too scary!
Rachel: Me either. Umm, all right, first thing I need you to do is go downstairs and find a women named Hilda and tell her to go home.
Rachel: I bet 20.
Rachel: Hit me!
Rachel: She spit up. Judy! She spi�Judy! Look alive, Judy! (they sit down) Thank you.
Rachel: No, it's okay, you didn't know.
RACHEL: Yeah, I love that story. Um, I got a question for you guys. Why do people keep is saying that is good to see me up and about?
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: (trying to divert his attention from the window by jumping up and down) HI!! Hi!
Rachel: Ohhh!!
Rachel: Oh, terrific! That'll be $2,000.
Rachel: Ross, I don't, I just don't think it's going to fit.
Rachel: I'm doin' good, baby. How you doin'?
Rachel: Good luck to ya!
Rachel: (miserably) No, no, that's not what we ordered... We ordered a fat-free crust with extra cheese.
Rachel: Wow!
Rachel: Okay, y'know what? There's only one way I'm leaving this hotel room.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Monica are in pajamas and Monica is making something in the blender as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: What-what, wait a minute, you don't think that's why he wants me back?
Rachel: No! Phoebe just because I'm alone doesnt mean I wanna walk around naked. I mean, you live alone, you don't walk around naked.
Rachel: Well, y'know, possibly. (pause) You didnt tell him that, though? Right?
Monica: (on phone) Hi, umm I know this is last minute, but weve decided to throw an impromptu baby shower for Rachel today.
Rachel: Thank you. (They hug.) Oh Joey and look at this crib! Its so cute!
Rachel: Monica, nothing has even happened yet, and you're already so...
Rachel: Okay, just a little scared. What's going on Ross?
(The door opens. Rachel is standing there. Her coat is muddy and torn, her hair is dishevelled and her face is bruised. Everyone turns to look)
Rachel: All right, okay, look, what if you could keep the apartment and get the tickets?
Rachel: Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! (Throws some more rice.)
Rachel: Yeah, I know, I know, I know he does. But I have to tell him how I feel! He deserves to have all the information and then he can make an informed decision.
Rachel: Really?!
Rachel: Because I knew you were lying!
Rachel: Hi, Pheebs? Okay, so just spoke to the nurse and the reason that your doctor is late is because uh, she's not coming.
Monica: Here. Ben, do you wanna play the airplane game, do you wanna show Rachel? Come here. (takes Ben) Were gonna do something fun. Okay. (throws Ben up in the air a little bit and catches him) Weee!! (moves into the living room and does it again) Weee!! (starts to walk back into the kitchen as she does it again, and hits Bens head on that wooden beam across the ceiling.)
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: You and your stupid fear. I hate your fear. I would like to take you and your fear....
Rachel: Pancho Vila?
Rachel: (under her breath) Sucker!
(Rachel turns to Ross stunned.)
(Ross and Rachel enter.)
Rachel: Oh my God.
Rachel: No!
Rachel: Well, just because it happened that way for them doesn't mean it has to happen that way for us.
Rachel: Whoa-oh, what's-what's that? (Points.)
Rachel: SSSHHHHTTT!!He's asking her a question!!
Rachel: Yeah, all right. All right! Just keep walkin'! All right?
Emily: But, we cant go now. It looks like Rachels gonna put on a skit.
[Scene: Central Perk - Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Ross and Rachel are sitting on the sofas. Joey enters]
Joey: Who's your friend? He's hot! (Ross laughs and Rachel smacks him with her purse.)
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: Okay! So, well just stay married.
(Rachel stops fast forwarding.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is returning from her interview attempt.]
Rachel: You are asking me to be your wife!
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Ross? Look, whatever this relationship stuff that Emily wants, just give it to her. Come on, the bottom line here is that you love her. So just fix whatever she wants fixed. Just do it. (The phone starts ringing.) I mean, you're gonna have to try. You'll just gonna hate yourself if you don't. (The phone keeps ringing.) Oh come on answer it! It's driving me crazy!
Phoebe: There was a pregnancy test in the garbage, and its positive. Monicas pregnant. (Rachel covers her mouth.) So I guess she wont be totally alone.
Rachel: Oh! (She's trying to recover while still on the floor.)
Rachel: Hey, so did everything go all right with the annulment?
Rachel: Oh-oh, Pottery Barn! (Grabs the aforementioned catalog and holds the rest back out to Chandler.) You can throw the rest away.
RACHEL: Monica, let it go.
Rachel: Pheebs?
Ross: Well, y'know how I'm trying to work things out with Emily. Well, there's this one thing Okay, (Rachel has her back turned to the camera, and Ross isn't looking at her.) here goes. I made a promise that-(they cut to the other camera and Ross notices something coming out of Rachel's nose)-Oh hey!
Rachel: Phoebe, no! This is, this is insane.
Rachel: Okay, just give me the damn drops! (Grabs them and storms out.)
[Scene: The Virgin Atlantic flight to London that Rachel is on.]
Monica: (interrupting) The days and nights are hard! I get it! Okay? Look umm, Rachel Im sorry! I have to start getting ready! Im getting married today!
Rachel: I love him. Hes so pretty I wanna cry! I dont know what to do. Tell me what to do.
Rachel: For like a half an hour! Man, you can lie about Sweden!
Rachel: (bowing) Hello!
Rachel: What was that?!
Rachel: I havent seen it yet!
(Rachels cab backs up.)
RACHEL: You want me to just call him up and tell him that you're seeing him instead? That's what you want?
(She laughs and opens the door to reveal Rachel sitting on the bed.)
RACHEL: God, Ross, look, what you and I have is special, all Paolo and I ever had was...
Rachel: Hey, Pheebs, quick question for ya.
Rachel: (stopping a nurse who's coming out of a room) Oh, uhm, excuse me, I'm here to see my father. My name is Rachel Green.
Rachel: I mean, y'know I'm just gonna have to accept it (She grabs the rest of the pictures)
Rachel: (entering) Monica? You gonna be very proud of me. I just got us dates with two unbelievably cute nurses.
Rachel: We took our apartment back!! (Slams the door shut.)
(Rachel kisses him, and goes upstairs. After shes gone, Ross frantically tries to find and read the Does it? part.)
VAN DAMME: 'Cause Rachel told me uh, you were dying to have a threesome with me and uh, Drew Barrymore. By the way, Drew has some groundrules and...
Rachel: Hey!
Monica: Ugh, I thought you were Rachel!
Rachel: What?
Ross: I wanna go talk to Rachel for a minute, are you gonna be okay alone for a bit?
Rachel: Fine. Fine, but Ill have you know that once I taught him that stuff he called me Fun Aunt Rachel. And I loved being Fun Aunt Rachel but Ill go back to being Boring and Uncomfortable Aunt Rachel if thats what you want!