words in movies
[Scene: Joeys Bedroom, Joey is having a dream about Rachel giving birth with him as the father.]
Rachel: Oh Joey, Im so happy things worked out for us that were having this baby together. I love you so much.
Rachel: And I hope its not an inappropriate time to say this but, youre the best sex I ever had.
Rachel: (bursts into the room) Joey! Joey!
Rachel: Come feel this! Come feel my belly!
Rachel: Joey! The baby is kicking for the first time! Will you please come feel this?!
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: Oh, okay! (She goes over to him and he feels her belly.)
Rachel: Aw, its unbelievable! Wow! She is kicking so much! Oh, shes like umm oh whos that kind of annoying girl soccer player?
Rachel: Mia Hamm!
Rachel: (looking down) Oh-oh!! One hand on the sheet Joe!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: What?! It is?! (He tries to quickly remove his gloves, but runs into trouble and finally throws them off of his hands like a hockey player in a fight and grabs Rachels belly.)
Rachel: Its not kicking right now. Although we would love to see you do (Mimics him) that again.
Rachel: Last night! I just felt it and I went into Joeys room and he was sleeping
Rachel: Joey. Joey, something feels weird and not good weird. I dontWhoa!! (Winces in pain.)
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: Okay. Oh GodOw!Oo!
Joey: Okay Rach-Rach-Rach look at me, look at me, everythings gonna be fine, trust me. Okay. Take my hand. Here we go. (Rachel grabs his hand.) Oww crushing bones!
[Scene: The Hospital, Joey is in the waiting room as Rachel comes back out with the doctor.]
Rachel: Hmm, mild discomfort. So I take it youve had one of these Braxton thingies?
Rachel: Thank you doctor. (Dr. Long exits.) (To Joey) Oh thank you for being so nice and calm.
Rachel: But wait you said everything was gonna be okay.
Rachel: But IBut everything is okay. Im fine!
Rachel: Yes! Yes! I got half a mind to contract that doctors uterus though. Mild discomfort, whats he talking about?
Rachel: Yeah, everythings fine!
Rachel: Okay, no uterus, no opinion.
Rachel: Oh you went to the movies by yourself?
Rachel: Oh, I gotta go back in there.
Rachel: No, everythings fine. I just gotta go back
Rachel: I-I forgot my underwear. (Ross lets her go.)
Chandler: So, hows the hideously inappropriate crush on Rachel coming?
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is balancing an aluminum can on her stomach as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Hey Ross! Check it out! I learned a new trick!
Rachel: Ohh! Thats so sweet of you! Oh yum! (Takes a bite out of the sandwich and starts to get sick.) Did you put pickles on this?
Rachel: Oh Ross!! (Runs to the bathroom and closes the door.)
Ross: (to Rachel) I-Im sorry Rach, I didnt know. Are you gonna be okay?
Rachel: Yeah, Ill be fine. But could someone please make sure that sandwich is gone when I get out there?
Rachel: (entering) Well, if anyone is keeping score, I no longer eat tuna.
Rachel: Whats up?
Rachel: (Gasps) Are you breaking up with us?
Joey: The thing is cause I live with Rachel Im here for a lot of the stuff, okay? (To Rachel) And Ross Ross is missing everything. So
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Are you asking me to move out? Do you not want me here?
Rachel: But Joey, I dont think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. I mean(Ross turns to her with wishful eyes.)Or he does.
Rachel: But Ross, its you and me!
Rachel: I dont know. Is it crazy?
Rachel: Okay, lets do it. Ill move in.
Rachel: Yeah.
Chandler: So Rachels all moved out huh? How are you taking it?
Joey: Well uh, I wanted to have a few beers, but uh, I got rid of those because Rachel couldnt stand the smell of them. But I have thrown back a lot of orange juice with calcium though. And uh, its a couple weeks past its expiration date, so its got a bit of a kick.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Joey, and Monica are sitting on the couch as Ross is up getting some coffee.]
ROSS: A tattoo? Why, why would you want to do that? [to Rachel] Hi.
RACHEL: No, no no no, don't need to know the details.
Rachel: (returning with her purse covering her face) All right, it won't come off!
Rachel: I-I-I don't know.
Rachel: Its good. Except he makes us watch the Discovery Channel all day long. Did you know that something really boring happened to someone really ugly in the Middle Ages? (to the waitress handing her a cup of coffee) Oh, thank you. Ill see you guys later.
Rachel: (proud of herself) Yeah, I-I-I just pulled the tab and I just fogged his yeti ass!
Rachel: Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, lets talk about it!! How was she?
Rachel: No, not really. Youre pressing the baby into my bladder and now I have to pee. Sorry. (She gets up and starts for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Oh no wait Pheebs, I think for something like that you just ask them to move in with you. But I'm not sure, Chandler?
Phoebe: (gasps) You wouldnt! Okay look, Rachel I know you really want to do this, but I-Ive never been maid of honor to anyone before! And I know youve done it at least twice!
Rachel: (entering, excitedly) Oh! Hi you guys, oh my God! Youll never gonna believe happened to me today! I am sitting in my office and
RACHEL: Well I. . .
Ross: Alright, ok, let's do it. (Ross sits down at the desk and they all gather around him) Uhm, I know we start by discussing the shortcomings of carbon dating... uhm, and then, then I move on to what is clearly the defining moment of the Mesozoic era, the breakup of Pangea, hello! (Rachel and Joey look confused) And then, there's the... eh... there's the overview of the Triassic.
RACHEL: [reluctantly] Uh-huh.
RACHEL: No. Well, yeah, maybe.
RACHEL: Yes I do, it's just that Ross is. . .
RACHEL: Uh-huh.
RACHEL: What's 1922?
RACHEL: No.
RACHEL: You?
Rachel: Hi! Phoebe. (Both Monica and her try to move out of Phoebes way.)
RACHEL: Ok, Ross, Ross, ok listen, what we have is amazing.
RACHEL: What was the book?
Monica: It is so weird, I know what I said, but uh, this morning, I was lying in bed I was, I was imagining what it would be like to say yes. (Rachel slams the magazine shut in amazement.) I know its a little sudden, and its a little rushed, and its totally not like me to do something like this, but that doesnt mean I cant. Right? I mean Im-Im crazy about Pete, and I know that we want the same things, and when I thought about saying yes, it made me really happy.
Rachel: Oh, hi sweetie. (They kiss)
Man: For God's sake, will you let it go? There's no Rachel!
Rachel: Oh God, come on you guys, is this really necessary? I mean, I can stop charging anytime I want.
Rachel: You dont even have cats.
Joey: Monica what're you doin'? You can't go shopping with her? What about Rachel?
RACHEL: Ok, we never shoulda talked about this.
RACHEL: You didn't get it?
RACHEL: Why didn't you get it?
(Sick Bastard sits down in a chair that enables him to look around the screen and stare at Rachel.)
Rachel: No, you know what, I think you should go.
RACHEL: Oh.
RACHEL: Is Ross here?
Rachel: Oh, wait, Joshua! Joshua! (Pause) (Comes back inside) Yeah, well, that oughta do it.
RACHEL: Oh, well, you know, they're just separated so, you know, never know, we'll see.
RACHEL: What? You didn't get one.
Joey says "Ichiban". It displays a few girls dancing around and Joey fills most of the screen, he puts something blue on his lips and smacks them saying "Lipstick For Men!" It goes on to show him playing a guitar and putting on more blue lipstick. In the end he says seductively "Ichiban... Lipstick For Men" and "Sahiko" and it ends. Chandler and Rachel are speechless.)
Rachel: And my veil was lace, made by blind, Belgium nuns.
RACHEL: Not at all inappropriate!
RACHEL: Really?
Rachel: Yeah! If you don't I will! Of course your body's gonna change. Your breasts are gonna get bigger, your ass is gonna get bigger, you're gonna lose bladder control. (she starts sobbing) God! It's just such a magical time!
RACHEL: Well?
RACHEL: I guess.
Rachel: Oh my God! How long has she been crying?
Rachel: Dealer takes two. (she deals herself two cards) What do you bet?
Rachel: whhh wait, you're gonna leave my party to take care of a box of rats?
RACHEL: What are you, what are you doin'?
RACHEL: Thank you.
RACHEL: I didn't know that.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone except Phoebe is there as Rachel enters carrying a magazine.]
Rachel: Ugh, Monica I dont want to steal your stupid thunder!
Rachel: All right let me see. (grabs the card) Uma Thurman, Winona Ryder, Elizabeth Hurely, Michelle Pfieffer, and Dorothy Hammel?
RACHEL: Hey, nice toilet.
RACHEL: Oh, well, it pretty much sucked. How was yours?
Pete: Well, if that were true, Id dating my Aunt Ruth. And the two times we went out were just plain awkward. (to Rachel) Come on, you think she should go out with me, dont you?
Rachel: Oh, y'know what? That was a complete misunderstanding! (Ross puts his arms around her and they act all sweetness and light)
Rachel: Okay, now what was that all about? Is it-does it not taste good? Let me try it.
[ Scene: The freeway. Rachel is driving Monica's Porsche, while using her mobile phone. Ross is sitting next to her.]
Mindy: (to Rachel) You did it twice?
RACHEL: What's goin' on?
Rachel: Well, dont look at me! My hairs straight! Straight! Straight! Straight!
RACHEL: [sarcastically] I've never wanted you more.
Rachel: Okay, very cute braces. Anyway yknow what, the point is Tag, start looking because you are going to find those contracts on your desk. (She goes into her office.)
TERRY: Uh, Rachel, sweetheart, could I see ya for a minute?
RACHEL: Fine, I will.
[Phoebe walks up to Rachel, cleaning tables.]
RACHEL: Oh yeah.
RACHEL: Well I love you too.
Rachel: Just get out! Now!!
Rachel: Yeah, I did, but y'know what? I am really, really trying to cut back, y'know? (Laughs) Good luck, Rach.
RACHEL: Yes it is.
Rachel: Oh yeah, really? Is it Ross? Yeah? Okay, well let me make this a just a little bit easier for you.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is siting on the couch as Ross and Chandler enter after playing basketball.]
Rachel: No! Joey, oh youre so sweet. Youre so-so sweet, honey. But Im not, Im not looking for a husband.
Rachel: What, what, wait a minute! You haven�t even told her you were a doctor, yet? How long have you known her, likean hour?
RACHEL: Well you better.
Rachel: Yknow what? No. Its not over until someone says, "I do." (Exits)
Rachel: Look, Charlie, I just want you to know. Ross is just having a little trouble adjusting to the thought of Joey and me. You know, he normally doesn't drink like this.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting at the kitchen counter and Ross enters from Rachel and Emma's room.]
Rachel: I will not! Im the divisional head of mens sportswear!
[Scene: Rachel and Joey's. Joey's home alone, reading a Sports Illustrated magazine when Chandler enters.]
RACHEL: Oh my God.
[Scene: Outside the beach house, Ross is telling Joey and Chandler what happened with Rachel.]
Rachel: Oh my God! Calling from Rome! (Takes phone) Bon giorno, caro mio.
RACHEL: Would you guys stop.
Rachel: No, so I dont have to get married until Im 33! Thats three years, thats three whole yearsOh, wait a minute though. Ill need a year and a half to plan the wedding, and Id like to know the guy for a year, year and a half before we get engaged Which means I need to meet the guy by the time Im thirty.
Rachel: OK... see your two... and I raise you twenty. (throws it in)
(Everyone follows Rachel to the living room. Monica pulls Joey aside.)
ROY: He'll be here OK, take a chill pill. [Chip pins Monica's corsage on, Monica then turns and whispers to Rachel]
PHOEBE: Rachel.
Rachel: (looking at picture) Hey he's wearing a sweater.
RACHEL, MONICA, ROY, and CHIP: Bye.
RACHEL: So what happens next?
Rachel: I still dont get how you know when its false labour.
RACHEL: Great set tonight Phoebs.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah. Could be Rachel asking if someone could baby-sit again.