words in movies
[Scene: Joeys Bedroom, Joey is having a dream about Rachel giving birth with him as the father.]
Rachel: Oh Joey, Im so happy things worked out for us that were having this baby together. I love you so much.
Rachel: And I hope its not an inappropriate time to say this but, youre the best sex I ever had.
Rachel: (bursts into the room) Joey! Joey!
Rachel: Come feel this! Come feel my belly!
Rachel: Joey! The baby is kicking for the first time! Will you please come feel this?!
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: Oh, okay! (She goes over to him and he feels her belly.)
Rachel: Aw, its unbelievable! Wow! She is kicking so much! Oh, shes like umm oh whos that kind of annoying girl soccer player?
Rachel: Mia Hamm!
Rachel: (looking down) Oh-oh!! One hand on the sheet Joe!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: What?! It is?! (He tries to quickly remove his gloves, but runs into trouble and finally throws them off of his hands like a hockey player in a fight and grabs Rachels belly.)
Rachel: Its not kicking right now. Although we would love to see you do (Mimics him) that again.
Rachel: Last night! I just felt it and I went into Joeys room and he was sleeping
Rachel: Joey. Joey, something feels weird and not good weird. I dontWhoa!! (Winces in pain.)
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: Okay. Oh GodOw!Oo!
Joey: Okay Rach-Rach-Rach look at me, look at me, everythings gonna be fine, trust me. Okay. Take my hand. Here we go. (Rachel grabs his hand.) Oww crushing bones!
[Scene: The Hospital, Joey is in the waiting room as Rachel comes back out with the doctor.]
Rachel: Hmm, mild discomfort. So I take it youve had one of these Braxton thingies?
Rachel: Thank you doctor. (Dr. Long exits.) (To Joey) Oh thank you for being so nice and calm.
Rachel: But wait you said everything was gonna be okay.
Rachel: But IBut everything is okay. Im fine!
Rachel: Yes! Yes! I got half a mind to contract that doctors uterus though. Mild discomfort, whats he talking about?
Rachel: Yeah, everythings fine!
Rachel: Okay, no uterus, no opinion.
Rachel: Oh you went to the movies by yourself?
Rachel: Oh, I gotta go back in there.
Rachel: No, everythings fine. I just gotta go back
Rachel: I-I forgot my underwear. (Ross lets her go.)
Chandler: So, hows the hideously inappropriate crush on Rachel coming?
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is balancing an aluminum can on her stomach as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Hey Ross! Check it out! I learned a new trick!
Rachel: Ohh! Thats so sweet of you! Oh yum! (Takes a bite out of the sandwich and starts to get sick.) Did you put pickles on this?
Rachel: Oh Ross!! (Runs to the bathroom and closes the door.)
Ross: (to Rachel) I-Im sorry Rach, I didnt know. Are you gonna be okay?
Rachel: Yeah, Ill be fine. But could someone please make sure that sandwich is gone when I get out there?
Rachel: (entering) Well, if anyone is keeping score, I no longer eat tuna.
Rachel: Whats up?
Rachel: (Gasps) Are you breaking up with us?
Joey: The thing is cause I live with Rachel Im here for a lot of the stuff, okay? (To Rachel) And Ross Ross is missing everything. So
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Are you asking me to move out? Do you not want me here?
Rachel: But Joey, I dont think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. I mean(Ross turns to her with wishful eyes.)Or he does.
Rachel: But Ross, its you and me!
Rachel: I dont know. Is it crazy?
Rachel: Okay, lets do it. Ill move in.
Rachel: Yeah.
Chandler: So Rachels all moved out huh? How are you taking it?
Joey: Well uh, I wanted to have a few beers, but uh, I got rid of those because Rachel couldnt stand the smell of them. But I have thrown back a lot of orange juice with calcium though. And uh, its a couple weeks past its expiration date, so its got a bit of a kick.
Rachel: (entering) Joey, what are you doing with the bag? You're audition is not until tomorrow.
MONICA: Yeah, well you promised Barry, you'd marry him. (Rachel glares at her, and she retreats to safety between Richard's legs)
Terry: Rachel, Rachel, sweetheart. You're a terrible, terrible waitress. Really, really awful.
[Scene: Chandler's apartment. Chandler is sitting between Rachel and Ross.]
[Scene: Monica's eye doctor's office, Monica and Rachel are waiting in an exam room and looking at this big white thing used to check eyes. I have no idea what it is, and if an ophthalmologist happens to know what that is, let me know.]
Rachel: Okay, you look in the kitchen, I will look in the back closet.
Rachel: Yeah, well it was. I, I broke a cup.
Monica: (turns his back to the stairs) Oh, it's a great party! Great food. Y'know, most parties it's all chips and salsa, chips and salsa. (As she's saying this Rachel tries to head downstairs but is blocked by people coming upstairs. She quickly retreats back up the stairs.) (Sees that she has to keep him distracted longer.) So umm, what's this? (Points to his plate.)
Rachel: Thanks, you can just put it on the table.
RACHEL: So wait, this guy goes down for like two years at a time?
(Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Yeah! Ive been sailing my whole life. When I was fifteen my dad bought me my own boat.
Rachel: Oh my god.
Rachel: Thank you. Thank you so much!
Rachel: Saw what?
(Rachel enters, excited.)
Rachel: Ok, I'm gonna get my stuff.
Monica: Hello? Hello? Oh! Rachel, it's Paolo calling from Rome.
Rachel: Ok.
Rachel: I can't, I gotta go.
Rachel: Oh? Yeah! Sure!
Rachel: Noo!! No! You thought, you actually thought I wanted to have sex with you?!
(Amy looks at Ross, angrily. Rachel clearly doesn't understand what he meant and looks at Ross who gestures "later".)
Rachel: Because!
Rachel: Because!
Rachel: Well, you should have.
Rachel: No! No! Seriously, whats wrong with the dog?! Wait a minute, what are you doing home so early? What happened to your date?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: By all means.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, the whole gang is there, except for Ross and Rachel. Joey is trying to eat Chinese with chopsticks and fails miserably. Theres a knock on the door, and Chandler answers it to reveal Rachel]
Rachel: Oh my God! Yes, I would love that, oh, that is soo sweet, Joey.
[Cut to later, the party is in full swing. Rachel is in the kitchen and Chandler goes over to talk to her.]
Rachel: (as Monica) Aahh, I'm a... chef at a restaurant uptown.
Rachel: (pretends to be stunned) Oh! Wi... in the dres... in the dressing room!? Well, that's so weird! Phoebe and I were just trying on clothes in the dressing room. God it's just such a small world!
Rachel: Yeah, when were in the audience he doesnt talk to us, but he does wave.
Rachel: I know. Joey: I don't get it. I mean, I was so sure this was what I wanted.
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Ross, I am telling you that she is using you to get back at me!
Joey: (hearing Rachel and jumping up with his plate) Oh God! Thats Rachel!
(Rachel is looking at the magazine and laughing.)
Rachel: Well, Phoebe that’s fine because I’m not moving.
Rachel: Oh, Monica, you think Skippy liked you? Honey, all those buys had a bet to see if he can knock you over.
Rachel: Five.
Rachel: There's no room under the bed. (looks around because she can't find Joey anymore)
Rachel: Thats all right. (to her friends) I mean hard is it to get a couple drinks right, huh?
Rachel: Ok... I got a spider. There were two, I picked the bigger one.
Rachel: Come on you gotta have one!
Rachel: Great! Now he's gonna know it was me!
Ross: Uh-ha, what about someone who looks like Rachel? (Russell glares at him.) I will think about the therapy.
Monica: No youre fine. (Joey checks anyway.) All right well, do you think I could take Rachel?
Rachel: Can you come here with me for a minute?
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is bringing Phoebe some coffee.]
(Rachel and Monica look at each other, and agree on something without saying anything.)
Rachel: Hi mum, put her back on!
Rachel: I know. Im sorry. Look, Ill make a deal with you all right? Okay?
(Rachel walks away from Paolo, laughing.)
Rachel: Oh! I have your key. Here you go. (Hands it to Monica.)
Rachel: No way, forget it.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Ross is just hanging up the phone as Rachel and Phoebe enter.]
Rachel: Oh, she's coming up! She's coming up! (Turns on the TV)
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
(He takes her hands in his and kisses each one, then kisses her on the lips. When the break the kiss, Rachel starts to get nauseous and throw up. Joey backs away in horror.)
Rachel: And, Ill be nice.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are at the counter as Ross enters.]
Ross: Umm, candles, champagne, yeah anniversaries are great. Cause you know love lasts forever, y'know. Nothing like it in this lifetime, money in the bank, so Rachel and I broke up.
Rachel: Okay. Wow! So I get to see what Joey Tribbiani is like on a date. So do you have any moves?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica carries a box out of Rachels room.]
Rachel: I dont care, Im not going anywhere.
Rachel: Ok, ok, ok. I promise, I promise, I promise, I won’t do it again. I really do. I promise. This is gonna be great.
RACHEL: So uh, Ryan, were you shipping off to?
Rachel: Well,sounds like you two have issues.
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: ...I think that bitch cracked my tooth.
Rachel: What're you guys doing out here?
Rachel: Goodbye, baby.
Rachel: WellReally? I thought Chandler was your best friend.
Rachel: Oh my God, Le Poo, our dog!
Rachel: Y'know, I figure if I can make coffee, there isn't anything I can't do.
Rachel: Hey.
[Scene: Joey's room: Joey is sitting on his bed reading DooL transcript when Rachel walks in]
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: (taking a bite) Oh my God! That is so good!
Rachel: (Brings Marcel a teddy bear) Marcel, this is for you. It's, uh, just, y'know, something to, um, do on the plane.
Rachel: No? Yknow, I can tie one of these into a knot using just my tongue.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Rachel is having drinks with her date, Carl.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is on the phone, everyone else is there except Joey.]
Rachel: Oh. (She tries to walk away from Josh, by he keeps holding her) Stop it!
Rachel: Oh, I guess. Except everything looks like jammies now.
Rachel: Yeah! (She puts on her coat and turns around and sees Ross is expecting her to help.) (Laughing.) Are you kiddin'?
Rachel: Alright, that's it! Give it back! That's it!
RACHEL: Uhh, let's just stay clear of 'I'm the guy that's doing you daughter' and you should be ok.
(Rachel enters in a wet wedding dress and starts to search the room.)
Rachel: I know...
Rachel: Hi! Sorry- sorry we're late, we, uh, kinda just, y'know, lost track of time.
Rachel: Oh please. Okay, anyone in this room think that I would send Ross begging symbols, please show of hands. (Ross raises his hand and no one else.)
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Wait! Maybe, maybe youre overreacting! You do that yknow.
Rachel: (through wall) Ooh... I love Barbados!
Rachel: I wanna sleep, I wanna eat, I wanna take a shower, I mean before she wakes up and we gotta do this all over again.
Rachel: Come on! I dont want you thinking of me like that any more!
Rachel: Okay... Let me put it this way. Anything from Crabtree and Evelyn?