words in movies
Joey: That's right I am! (Opens drawer and rummages through it. Rachel enters)
Rachel: Hi you guys!
Rachel: Oh er... well you know Emma started crawling? I realised that this place, is very unsafe for a baby. So I went to the store and got some stuff to baby-proof the apartment.
Rachel: No. I was just going to do this myself. (Joey makes a sarcastic laugh.)
Rachel: Yeah, Why? You don't think a woman can do this?
Rachel: Monica...would you please tell Joey that he is a pig?
Rachel: Wha!? What!? Come on! I found the hardware store all by myself!
Rachel: There is a hardware store right down the street?
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Rachel is fiddling with the drawer.]
Rachel: This is easy...Can't do this! (Moves away...and finds her sweater sleeve stuck to the drawer) Oh! Wow! Seriously I can't do this. (Fiddles more)
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Rachel is flipping through magazines. Handyman is installing things. Monica enters.]
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Yeah, I don't know who I was kidding. I can barely use chopsticks.
Rachel: Oh thank you so much. (Picks up the guy's spirit level) Oh oh wait! You forgot your erm...Your game. (hands it to him)
Rachel: Don't look at me I never get his jokes.
Rachel: Just when you thought that dude couldn't get any wierder.
Rachel: I don't know! I mean, what brought that on?
Rachel: No you really think that's what it is?
Rachel: Yeah! If you don't I will! Of course your body's gonna change. Your breasts are gonna get bigger, your ass is gonna get bigger, you're gonna lose bladder control. (she starts sobbing) God! It's just such a magical time!
Joey: Rach?! (He walks over to the fridge to put it in, but it cannot be opened either) Rachel!!!!? (He walks to the bathroom and tries to lift the toilet seat cover. It won't come up.) So I can't do anything I like????
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Chandler enters. Rachel and monica are seated at the table.]
Rachel: Argh. fascist
Rachel: Man, don't be surprised if her hands and her feet get bigger too!
Rachel: Oh my god Chandler! If you can't handle this, what are you going to be like in the hospital? With the blood and the screaming and the little present that's shooting out of her!?
[Scene: Joey's apartment. He's prying open the drawer with a crowbar to no avail. Monica, Rachel and Chandler enter.]
Rachel: Joey! Why did you tell Chandler that Monica was getting a boob job?
Monica, Rachel, Chandler: It's over/Joe!
(Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are carrying a couch through the door)
Rachel: Yeah, seriously coz this is really heavy. (She suddenly lets go) I mean not for me because i'm only pretending to hold this, but for these guys.
Chandler/Joey/Rachel/Monica: Bye bye Mike!/Cya mike!/Bye mike!/Bye bye now!
Rachel: I'm so sorry Pheebs.
RACHEL: Um, everyone?
Rachel: Well, in my defense, you were not supposed to tell each other.
(Rachel stops dead in her tracks when she sees whom Joey is with.)
Rachel: That's not European!
RACHEL: Ok.
Rachel: Oh, Barry..! Come on, this is all way too..
RACHEL: That's 'cause you have it.
Rachel: Bye. (After Julie exits.) What a manipulative bitch.
[And with that we start off on a series of clips from the entire history of Ross and Rachel, from Rosss point of view. The first clip is from The Pilot.]
RACHEL: Thank you.
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
RACHEL: Ok, I will have the uh, (whispers) side salad.
RACHEL: Me neither.
Phoebe and Rachel: OOooooo!
RACHEL: Fine.
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah. Definitely, well it definitely took me by surprise, but Im okay.
RACHEL: Hey.
Rachel: OK, I'm guessing this is from...
Rachel: What are you doing?! Get in the front!
RACHEL: Happy birthday.
RACHEL: Oh!
RACHEL: What party?
RACHEL: Who gave you that hickey?
RACHEL: Oh!
Rachel: Okay, Phoebe, honey, you gotta be kidding. I mean, you know you cannot keep one of these babies!
Rachel: Oh! (Opens the door to reveal a ballerina) Well youre just the prettiest ballerina Ive ever seen.
Rachel: As I was saying I should probably have the first of the three kids by the time Im 35 which gives me five years. I love this plan! I wanna marry this plan!
Rachel: Now wait a minute thats not fair. He was married to me a hell of a lot longer than he was married to Emily, he just didnt tell me. (Everyone looks at her, Ross not happily.) Maybe I have to pee again. (Gets up to try to use the bathroom.)
Rachel: Well, because she loves you and because you love her.
RACHEL: Ok.
RACHEL: What's up?
Rachel: What? Oh, well then yknow what? I think Monica would be very interested to know that you called her cheesecake dry and mealy.
Rachel: Yknow what, I-I have to go talk to her, would you let me just get changed?
RACHEL: But what about Phoebe?
Rachel: I know. Okay. (Whispering and thinking.) Okay. Okay. All right. All right, this is what were gonna do, we are gonna go to the next highest bidder, and we are just gonna let them buy it, and then youre just gonna pay the difference.
RACHEL: Oh, no no no no. Oh no no no no. I have to do this to her?
Rachel: Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right? That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap! (Joey starts to get up.) No I take that back!
Rachel: Ok actually Mon, Matthew was just giving me his phone number.
Rachel: I didnt know you could get married here.
RACHEL: Honey, I'm sorry.
Rachel: (to Julie) Thank you. (under her breath to Chandler) What a bitch.
RACHEL: What?
RACHEL: Done.
Rachel: Oh thank you, Chandler, this is so great, shes gonna love me.
Rachel: (breaking the kiss) Oh God!
Rachel: Im not paying for half of that! Im only staying here until my apartment gets fixed.
RACHEL: Well, but Pheebs.
Rachel: Ahh, yes, I will have a glass of the Merlot and uh, (points to Rosss seat.) he will have a white wine spritzer. Woo! (Looks out the window.) Hey, look at that, the airports moving. (Realizes that thats not how it works.) Hey, are we moving?! Are we moving? Why are we moving? Hey, time-out, umm, yeah, does the captain know that were moving? (Sits back in defeat.) Oh my God. Oh, my gosh.
(Rachel rushes back and pulls Joey back onto the balcony, and takes him inside.)
Customer: (To Rachel) Ahh, miss? More coffee?
RACHEL: Oh God, Ross.� Ross is going to pick up the phone.� Oh, I have to get my number back.� (She turns to find Bill, but they have gone.)� Oh my God.� He's gone.
RACHEL: Uh, to Stephanie Schiffer.
Rachel: Well, come on, Steve; let's not rule out nervous laughter. Hey, now wait a minute. Phoebe told me that - that you owned your own restaurant. That's impressive.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is balancing an aluminum can on her stomach as Ross enters.]
RACHEL: Hey.
Rachel: Chandler and Monica?!! Oh, this is unbelievable!! How long have you known?
RACHEL: Do you?
RACHEL: You still think of it as your apartment, don't you?
Ross: Rachel says sharing's great and supposedly, you know, we outta be doing it. Do you wanna?
Rachel: What?! Wait! What are you talking about?! You love their Kung Pao Chicken!
Phoebe: Ok, you guys, I don’t mean to make things worse, but umm, I don’t want to live with Rachel anymore.
Rachel: Yeah, y'know what? I'm-I'm gonna meet you upstairs in a minute.
RACHEL: It'll never last, he's just a rebound roommate.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels apartment, Rachel is unpacking as the phone rings.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, time lapse, Ross is entering. Chandler and Monica are at the kitchen table. Rachel is on the couch reading.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is watching Joey pace nervously as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Well, my eye is a little itchy.
Rachel: Please. If she said to you, "Ross, I want you on this couch, right here, right now," what would you say?
Rachel: But I saved it. I put my basket on top.
Monica: (as Rachel) I am. I'm that stupid. (Little laugh.)
Rachel: Oh, yeah, check it. Definitely, I want some of that.
Rachel: Ross? All this time? Well, I've got to talk to him. (gets up to leave)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is drinking some Alka-Seltzer. The rest of the gang, minus Rachel is there as well.]
Rachel: We hate that guy.
Ross: One. (Rachel gives him the card.)
Rachel: Do you have any ice?
Rachel: See? I've even called Animal Control!
Ross: What? A dog? No! Rachel gets to choose.
Rachel: Cause I know hes gonna flip out and I hate it when hes angry.
RACHEL: You don't have birds.
Rachel: (as Ross enters with a present) But, but, Mona, I live here.
RACHEL: Come on, Terry, I'll even clean the cappuccino machine.
RACHEL: Terry is a jerk, ok? That's why we're always saying "Terry's a jerk!" That's where that came from.
Rachel: (coming from the bathroom) Hey Pheebs?
Rachel: Monica, what is so amazing? I gave up, like, everything. And for what?
Rachel: Okay honey, you can finish this later were gonna be late. We gotta go.
Chandler: (to Rachel) I love you. (Kisses her on the forehead)
Rachel: Hey, Mon, if you were hoping to sleep with Joshua the first time tonight, which one of these would you want to be wearing. (Shes holding two frilly, lace nighties.)
Monica: No! Rachel is meeting us here.
(Rachel, Monica, Ross and Chandler whip around for a second time, in formation.)
MNCA: We are talking about Rachel here. You and Rachel.
Rachel: Mindy, my maid of. Oh!
Ballerina: I love you! (Hugs Rachel.)
Rachel: I can see that. You look like you slept with a hanger in your mouth.
[Rachel enters.]
Rachel: No its okay, this is whats gonna happen. Im gonna wait a couple years and then the baby will tell him.
Rachel: Oh, but look how straight those noodles are!
[Rachel takes a bite.]
Rachel: And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnt happen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
[Rachel enters.]