words in movies
(The whole gang is helping Rachel mail out resumes while whistling the theme from The Bridge on the River Kwai.)
Rachel: Hey, look, you guys, I'm going for anything here, OK? I cannot be a waitress anymore, I mean it. I'm sick of the lousy tips, I'm sick of being called 'Excuse me...'
Rachel: Uh... yeah, why?
Rachel: (upset) Oh my Goood! Oh, do you think it's on all of them?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler are sitting at a table. Rachel is working. Monica and Phoebe enter.]
Rachel: Hey... hi, ladies... uh, can I get you anything? (to Monica, quietly): Did you bring the mail?
Rachel: (to Monica): Really? (out loud): Sure, we have scones left! (to Monica): OK, read them to me.
Rachel: (out loud): We have apple cinnamon...
Rachel: What?
Rachel: (grabs the bill) Give me that!
Ross: No, it's not just that. It's justI want someone who... who does something for me, y'know? Who gets my heart pounding, who... who makes me, uh... (begins to stare lovingly at Rachel)
Ross: Look, I am totally, totally over her, OK, I just... (Rachel comes over, Ross lays head on table): Hiiii!
Rachel: Hi! How are you?
Rachel: OK. (walks away)
Rachel: Well, now, how come you guys have never played poker with us?
Rachel: Really.
Rachel: But you could teach us.
Rachel: Oh, good for you!
Rachel: Oh wait, I have the ten of spades! Here! (gives it to Phoebe)
Rachel: Oh, no-no-no-no-no-no, that's OK, I don't need them. I'm going for fours.
Phoebe and Rachel: OOooooo!
Rachel: OK, sorry to break up this party, but I've got resumes to fax before work tomorrow... (gets up to leave)
Rachel: Settle what?
Ross: The game, Rachel, the game. You owe us money for the game.
Rachel: Oh. Right.
Rachel: (to Ross): So basically, you get your ya-yas by taking money from all of your friends.
Ross: Look, Rachel, this is poker. I play to win, alright? In order for me to win, other people have to lose. So if you're gonna play poker with me, don't expect me to be a 'nice guy,' OK? Cause once those cards are dealt... (claps hands three times)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe are there.]
Rachel: (opening mail) Can you believe what a jerk Ross was being?
Rachel: Oh, I beg to differ. The Pictionary incident?
Rachel: Oooooh. (reads letter) (surprised): Oh! I got an interview! I got an interview!
Rachel: (in disbelief): Sak's... Fifth... Avenue.
Monica: Oh, Rachel!
Rachel: Assistant buyer. Oh! I would be shopping... for a living!
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Why?
Rachel: Oh my God!
Monica: Uh, Aunt Iris? This is Phoebe, and that's Rachel...
[Scene: Ross's apartment, everyone but Rachel is seated around his table. The Lion Sleep Tonight plays in the background.]
(Knock on door. Ross opens it. Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Guys! Guess what, guess what, guess what, guess what!
Rachel: Noooo... the interview! She loved me! She absolutely loved me. We talked for like two and a half hours, we have the same taste in clothes, andoh, I went to camp with her cousin... And, oh, the job is perfect. I can do this. I can do this well!
Rachel: Oh God, oh, and then she told the funniest story...
Phoebe and Rachel: Yes, we should. I think we should.
Rachel: No, no, thats OK. Y'know, I think I'm gonna give it a go.
Rachel: Alright... (shuffles cards expertly, all the guys stare in amazement)
Ross: So, Phoebs owes $7.50, Monica, you owe $10, and Rachel, you owe fifteen big ones.
Rachel: Mmm-hmmm. Oh, so typical. Ooo, I'm a man. Ooo, I have a penis. Ooo, I have to win money to exert my power over women. (hands over her money)
Rachel: Hmm. Kinda stepped on my point there, Mon.
Rachel: Ooooh, that's fine. We'll see who has the last laugh there, monkey boy.
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no-no, I'm still waiting to hear from that job and the store closes at nine, so you can eat then.
Ross: Alright. (to Rachel): Your money's mine, Green.
Rachel: Your fly is open, Geller. (he checks it, and zips up)
Rachel: I'm in.
Rachel: Well, well, well, hop back in bucko, cause I got four sixes! (lays down cards) I won! I actually won! Oh my God! Y'know what? (collects chips) I think I'm gonna make a little Ross pile. (holds up a chip) I think that one was Ross's, and I thinkohthat one was Ross's. Yes! (Starts singing): Well, I have got your money, and you'll never see it...
Rachel: And your fly's still open...
Rachel: Ha, I made you look....
Rachel: I couldn't be inner. Monica?
Phoebe: Me too. Rachel.
Rachel: Uh, I will see you... and I'll raise you. (throws chips in pot) What do you say... want to waste another buck?
Rachel: I'm not telling. (collects chips)
Ross: Come on, show them to me. (reaches for her cards, Rachel covers them up)
Rachel: No..!
Rachel: Get your hands out of there! No!
Rachel: (deals new hand) Boy, you really can't stand to lose, can you? Your whole face is getting red... little veins popping out on your temple...
Rachel: Oh, you are losing. Definitely losing. (phone rings)
Rachel: (answering phone) Hel-lo, Rachel Green.
Ross: (mimicking Rachel) Mee mee, mee-mee mee.
Rachel: (on phone) Excuse me. (covers up phone; to Ross) It's about the job.
(Rachel walks into kitchen to talk on the phone.)
Rachel: Barbara! Hi, how are you? (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) No, I understand. Yeah. Oh, oh, come on, no, I'm fine. Don't be silly. Yeah... oh, but you know, if-if anything else opens up, pleaHello? Hello? (hangs up phone, very depressed)
(Rachel goes back and sits down. The rest don't know what to say.)
Rachel: Yeah...(sigh)....OK. Where were we? Oh, OK... five card draw, uh... jacks or better... nothing wild, everybody ante.
Joey: Look, Rachel, we don't have to do this.
Rachel: Yes, we do. (pause)
Rachel: I see your fifty cents... and I raise you... five dollars. (throws it in)
Rachel: Well, I just lost a job, and I'd like to raise the bet five bucks. Does anybody have a problem with that?
Rachel: (to Ross): Loser?
Rachel: What do you mean, you fold? Hey, come on! What is this? I thought that 'once the cards were dealt, I'm not a nice guy.' I mean, what, were you just full of it?
Rachel: How many you want?
Ross: One. (Rachel gives him the card.)
Rachel: Dealer takes two. (she deals herself two cards) What do you bet?
Rachel: OK... see your two... and I raise you twenty. (throws it in)
Rachel: See your twenty-five...and...uh, Monica, get my purse.
Monica: Rachel, there's nothing in it.
Rachel: OK, then get me your purse.
(Monica gets Rachel her purse.)
Rachel: (to Monica): Thank you. (to Ross): I saw your twenty-five, and I raise you... seven.
Ross: (to Rachel): OK, I am calling your seventeen. What do you got?
Rachel: (lays down cards) Full house.
(Monica and Phoebe get up and start celebrating in the kitchen, pouring wine and singing. Rachel, shocked, goes to join them.)
Ross: Oh, well, when you don't have the cards, you don't have the cards, you know. (looks at Rachel) But, uh... look how happy she is. (smiles)
Rachel: Oh, time's up.
(Monica sits, Rachel gets up.)
Rachel: OK, OK, it's my turn. (reads the answer)
(Rachel starts drawing what looks like a bean.)
(Rachel begins tapping the picture of the bean frantically.)
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: Oh, slides. (Laughs.) So really nothing happened.
Rachel: Im serious, I really, I think I need just to have some...meaningless, sex y'know, with the next guy that I see.
Rachel: I gotta go! (Runs out.)
Rachel: Thank you. I yeah.
Rachel: Ross thanks.
Rachel: Yeah-eah-ha!
Rachel: Yeah do it now, call right now.
[Scene: Rachels Room, she is taking the ring out of Rosss jacket, looks at it, and puts it on her finger as Joey enters.]
Rachel: Thats a good story, Grandpa.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are playing phone pranks on Ross.]
(Rachel get suspicious)
Rachel: (shocked) Oh my God.
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Phoebe hates Pottery Barn?!
Rachel: Hm-mmm.
Rachel: Ugh, she is a slut!
Rachel: Im not telling you what to do! I am telling you what not to do!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, Chandler and Rachel are there, and Phoebe enters with the Chick and the Duck.]
Rachel: No.
Rachel: I - I have to get on the plane.
Rachel: Oh my God!
Rachel: Umm, well I would have to say that it's a, it's tragic love story.
Rachel: Absolutely not.
Rachel: Probably just the first half.
Rachel: No, absolutely. Yknow like it was umm
Rachel: What?! You-you actually thought that basket was gonna get you the apartment?
Joey: (contemplates for a few moments what Rachel just said) NAH! I don't have another level!!
Rachel: (entering from bathroom) Hey-hey! Oh, look at you, all sexy.
Rachel: Oh-okay, but Pheebs?
Rachel: Aw what are you?! A detective?
[Scene: Rachels birthday, a time lapse has occurred. Rachel is coming back into the living room carrying a notepad.]
Rachel: Yeah, yeah and you know what, I know she's gonna wanna run again, I just don't know how to get out of it, I mean, I live with her.
Rachel: I mean, didn't you think you were just gonna meet somone, fall in love- and that'd be it? (Ross gazes at her.) ..Ross?
Rachel: Hey. (they all walk away from Chandler)
Ross: (To Rachel) You uh, you may have been right about Jill.
Monica: Listen Rachel, I feel really bad aboutWhat are you doing? (She sees that Rachel is unpacking.)
Rachel: What?! You kissed!
Ross: Uhm... Rachel and I hired a male nanny. (Joey makes a gesture and sound like "Can you believe that?")
Rachel: What?!
(Rachel discreetly coughs to warn her.)
Rachel: Yeah, I got that.
Rachel: It was only 500 bucks.
Rachel: Well its only different if he wants it to be. I mean, Im not gonna ask him for anything.
(He closes the door before Rachel can say anything.)
Rachel: Well, I dont know. I called all the people in Monicas phone book and these are the only ones who could show up on 24 hours notice.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe are there waiting for Chandler's cyberchick to arrive]
Rachel: (entering) Joey, do you have a minute?
Rachel: Merrill Lynch?
Rachel: Well why didnt you take the job?
Rachel: (noticing a bunch of pictures around the door that werent there originally.) What-what are-what are these?
Rachel: (gasps) Rob Tillman!
Rachel: Ohh! Okay!
Rachel: Wow! How are you?!
Rachel: Ohh! Me too!
Rachel: (laughs) Oh yeah? Okay.
Rachel: Ohh, I would love too.
Rachel: All right, wherever you wanna go is cool.
Rachel: But! Dont you have to give him his money back?
Rachel: (she's finished reliving the fridge of its entire alcohol content.) Macadamia nut?
(She hangs up as Ross and Rachel enter.)
Ross: Mon, look who I ran into! (Gestures towards Rachel.)
Rachel: That would be great! Wait, how long is Denise gone for?
Rachel: Oh yeah.
Rachel: Oh no! No! No-no-no-no! No, I mean come on thats-thats crazyI mean thats crazy. So whats-whats going on with you? What is going on with you?
Rachel: Hes coming over! Hes coming over!
Rachel: Ah!
Joey: (shaking Rachels hand) Hi!
Joey: (To Rachel) So uh, how you doin?
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, Rachel is putting away her new clothes as Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: Ross, didn't you ah, play soccer in High School? Oh no wait, that's right. You just organized their game schedules on your Commodore 64.
[Phoebe walks from the living room to the kitchen and talks quietly to Rachel.]
Rachel: Well, he didnt say, but it was a fire. Im guessing not very good. Come on, we gotta go!
Rachel: (really excited) Great!! It was very, very nice to meet you sir--Ow! Hey! What are you doing?! Are you crazy! (He took out that thing they use to look at people's retinas and looked at Rachel's when she was shaking his hand causing her to flinch and scream at him.)
(Ross and Rachel approach, theyre still yelling at each other.)
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Wow! This is so amazing! What else? What else?
Mrs. Geller: This is your grandmothers engagement ring, I want you to give it to Rachel.
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Whats goin on?
Rachel: You just dont look old enough to have a twenty-year-old daughter.
Rachel: She asked-asked you out again?
Ross: Yeah but uh Okay, okay look you guys know that Rachel and I slept together, but theres something else. (Pause) Rachels pregnant.
Rachel: Well, I have a job interview at Ralph Lauren tomorrow!
Rachel: Im going for a walk.
Rachel: Ross, I didn't think it would that big of a deal.
Rachel: Oh, Pheebs, baby, that's nice but, you know what, I think I'm ok. Why don't you give it to one of your other single girlfriends?
Rachel: (as Monica) I use my breasts to get other people's attention.
Rachel: Are you joking? Check out is not til noon and he has a good (checks her watch) eleven minutes left.
Rachel: Ohh, of course Monicas brother!
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Ohh! No way Phoebe! I want to be Monicas!
(All animosity forgotten, Rachel holds the receiver out as she limps quickly over to her friend, who stands up in concern.)
Rachel: Yeah, pretty nice, huh? Now whos a pushover?
Rachel: (crying) Do you guys have to go to the new house right away, or do you have some time?
Rachel: (laughs) Yknow when I locked myself in the bathroom at my wedding, it was because I was trying to pop the window out of the frame.
Joey: Well, you lied again! (Rachel comes out of her room and is observing the conversation)
Rachel: Yeah sure, iced tea would be great.
Rachel: Umm, can I use your bathroom?
Rachel: Yeah, it sure is!
(Rachel and Phoebe exchange looks.)