words in movies
(The whole gang is helping Rachel mail out resumes while whistling the theme from The Bridge on the River Kwai.)
Rachel: Hey, look, you guys, I'm going for anything here, OK? I cannot be a waitress anymore, I mean it. I'm sick of the lousy tips, I'm sick of being called 'Excuse me...'
Rachel: Uh... yeah, why?
Rachel: (upset) Oh my Goood! Oh, do you think it's on all of them?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler are sitting at a table. Rachel is working. Monica and Phoebe enter.]
Rachel: Hey... hi, ladies... uh, can I get you anything? (to Monica, quietly): Did you bring the mail?
Rachel: (to Monica): Really? (out loud): Sure, we have scones left! (to Monica): OK, read them to me.
Rachel: (out loud): We have apple cinnamon...
Rachel: What?
Rachel: (grabs the bill) Give me that!
Ross: No, it's not just that. It's justI want someone who... who does something for me, y'know? Who gets my heart pounding, who... who makes me, uh... (begins to stare lovingly at Rachel)
Ross: Look, I am totally, totally over her, OK, I just... (Rachel comes over, Ross lays head on table): Hiiii!
Rachel: Hi! How are you?
Rachel: OK. (walks away)
Rachel: Well, now, how come you guys have never played poker with us?
Rachel: Really.
Rachel: But you could teach us.
Rachel: Oh, good for you!
Rachel: Oh wait, I have the ten of spades! Here! (gives it to Phoebe)
Rachel: Oh, no-no-no-no-no-no, that's OK, I don't need them. I'm going for fours.
Phoebe and Rachel: OOooooo!
Rachel: OK, sorry to break up this party, but I've got resumes to fax before work tomorrow... (gets up to leave)
Rachel: Settle what?
Ross: The game, Rachel, the game. You owe us money for the game.
Rachel: Oh. Right.
Rachel: (to Ross): So basically, you get your ya-yas by taking money from all of your friends.
Ross: Look, Rachel, this is poker. I play to win, alright? In order for me to win, other people have to lose. So if you're gonna play poker with me, don't expect me to be a 'nice guy,' OK? Cause once those cards are dealt... (claps hands three times)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe are there.]
Rachel: (opening mail) Can you believe what a jerk Ross was being?
Rachel: Oh, I beg to differ. The Pictionary incident?
Rachel: Oooooh. (reads letter) (surprised): Oh! I got an interview! I got an interview!
Rachel: (in disbelief): Sak's... Fifth... Avenue.
Monica: Oh, Rachel!
Rachel: Assistant buyer. Oh! I would be shopping... for a living!
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Why?
Rachel: Oh my God!
Monica: Uh, Aunt Iris? This is Phoebe, and that's Rachel...
[Scene: Ross's apartment, everyone but Rachel is seated around his table. The Lion Sleep Tonight plays in the background.]
(Knock on door. Ross opens it. Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Guys! Guess what, guess what, guess what, guess what!
Rachel: Noooo... the interview! She loved me! She absolutely loved me. We talked for like two and a half hours, we have the same taste in clothes, andoh, I went to camp with her cousin... And, oh, the job is perfect. I can do this. I can do this well!
Rachel: Oh God, oh, and then she told the funniest story...
Phoebe and Rachel: Yes, we should. I think we should.
Rachel: No, no, thats OK. Y'know, I think I'm gonna give it a go.
Rachel: Alright... (shuffles cards expertly, all the guys stare in amazement)
Ross: So, Phoebs owes $7.50, Monica, you owe $10, and Rachel, you owe fifteen big ones.
Rachel: Mmm-hmmm. Oh, so typical. Ooo, I'm a man. Ooo, I have a penis. Ooo, I have to win money to exert my power over women. (hands over her money)
Rachel: Hmm. Kinda stepped on my point there, Mon.
Rachel: Ooooh, that's fine. We'll see who has the last laugh there, monkey boy.
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no-no, I'm still waiting to hear from that job and the store closes at nine, so you can eat then.
Ross: Alright. (to Rachel): Your money's mine, Green.
Rachel: Your fly is open, Geller. (he checks it, and zips up)
Rachel: I'm in.
Rachel: Well, well, well, hop back in bucko, cause I got four sixes! (lays down cards) I won! I actually won! Oh my God! Y'know what? (collects chips) I think I'm gonna make a little Ross pile. (holds up a chip) I think that one was Ross's, and I thinkohthat one was Ross's. Yes! (Starts singing): Well, I have got your money, and you'll never see it...
Rachel: And your fly's still open...
Rachel: Ha, I made you look....
Rachel: I couldn't be inner. Monica?
Phoebe: Me too. Rachel.
Rachel: Uh, I will see you... and I'll raise you. (throws chips in pot) What do you say... want to waste another buck?
Rachel: I'm not telling. (collects chips)
Ross: Come on, show them to me. (reaches for her cards, Rachel covers them up)
Rachel: No..!
Rachel: Get your hands out of there! No!
Rachel: (deals new hand) Boy, you really can't stand to lose, can you? Your whole face is getting red... little veins popping out on your temple...
Rachel: Oh, you are losing. Definitely losing. (phone rings)
Rachel: (answering phone) Hel-lo, Rachel Green.
Ross: (mimicking Rachel) Mee mee, mee-mee mee.
Rachel: (on phone) Excuse me. (covers up phone; to Ross) It's about the job.
(Rachel walks into kitchen to talk on the phone.)
Rachel: Barbara! Hi, how are you? (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) No, I understand. Yeah. Oh, oh, come on, no, I'm fine. Don't be silly. Yeah... oh, but you know, if-if anything else opens up, pleaHello? Hello? (hangs up phone, very depressed)
(Rachel goes back and sits down. The rest don't know what to say.)
Rachel: Yeah...(sigh)....OK. Where were we? Oh, OK... five card draw, uh... jacks or better... nothing wild, everybody ante.
Joey: Look, Rachel, we don't have to do this.
Rachel: Yes, we do. (pause)
Rachel: I see your fifty cents... and I raise you... five dollars. (throws it in)
Rachel: Well, I just lost a job, and I'd like to raise the bet five bucks. Does anybody have a problem with that?
Rachel: (to Ross): Loser?
Rachel: What do you mean, you fold? Hey, come on! What is this? I thought that 'once the cards were dealt, I'm not a nice guy.' I mean, what, were you just full of it?
Rachel: How many you want?
Ross: One. (Rachel gives him the card.)
Rachel: Dealer takes two. (she deals herself two cards) What do you bet?
Rachel: OK... see your two... and I raise you twenty. (throws it in)
Rachel: See your twenty-five...and...uh, Monica, get my purse.
Monica: Rachel, there's nothing in it.
Rachel: OK, then get me your purse.
(Monica gets Rachel her purse.)
Rachel: (to Monica): Thank you. (to Ross): I saw your twenty-five, and I raise you... seven.
Ross: (to Rachel): OK, I am calling your seventeen. What do you got?
Rachel: (lays down cards) Full house.
(Monica and Phoebe get up and start celebrating in the kitchen, pouring wine and singing. Rachel, shocked, goes to join them.)
Ross: Oh, well, when you don't have the cards, you don't have the cards, you know. (looks at Rachel) But, uh... look how happy she is. (smiles)
Rachel: Oh, time's up.
(Monica sits, Rachel gets up.)
Rachel: OK, OK, it's my turn. (reads the answer)
(Rachel starts drawing what looks like a bean.)
(Rachel begins tapping the picture of the bean frantically.)
Rachel: Yes!
Jill: No! Yknow what Rachel? Youre right, yknow he has been really nice to me.
Rachel: Hey, you guys! Guess what? Barry and Mindy are getting a divorce!
Amy turns to Ross and Rachel: Why does she keep making that noise?
Chandler: (in a serious, businesslike tone) Rachel, could I see you for a moment?
Rachel: Yeah it was.
Rachel: Oh! Ive got a lot of those too!
Rachel: Come on, its not a big deal! We stayed up all night coming up with a plan so that us dating will not be a problem.
Rachel: No, forget it! No way! I am not sending anymore Ralph Lauren clothes to prison. It is a waste.
Rachel: Oh! Im sorry! Are we having an 89-year-old? How about Dayton?
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Dr. Long is checking on Rachel again.]
Rachel: Oh for the love of God!
Rachel: Oh come on!!
Monica: I am going I'm going--Turn it over! (Rachel rolled onto her stomach and Monica rolls her back.) I'm I am going to get these drops in your eyes. (She is holding Rachel down with both hands and has the eyedropper in her mouth.)
<Rachel and Amy 'fighting'.. They're really just trying to slap each other and just keep slapping their hands>
Ross: (To Rachel) Squeeze your legs together and cover the babys ears!
Rachel: I-I am not uptightHey-hey-hey-oh-oh! Listen, I am not uptight, man.
Rachel: Oh no-no, no! Its good! Its all good! I-I actually work at Ralph Lauren!
Rachel: Go get back on that case honey!
(Ross shrugs his shoulders to Rachel and Sick Bastard closes the screen all the way.)
Rachel: Okay, well then bring her in.
Ross: Hi roomie! (Hugs her and looks at Rachel.)
Rachel: I get it!
Rachel: Just tell me how.
Rachel: Oh we-we didnt.
Rachel: Okay. (Rachel lies back.)
Rachel: But I hired you!
Chandler: Should we tell Rachel theres an empty private room right next door to hers?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Oh hi.
Rachel: Oh, its a tattoo! Thats weird, Phoebe doesnt Wait thats Ursula! Thats not Phoebe that is Ursula!
Rachel: Hi Dr. Long, how are you?
Rachel: Oh. Look at you making up crap for me. Oh God! (Starts another contraction as Dr. Long enters.)
Rachel: What?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are unpacking and setting up their new purchases.]
Rachel: Oh yeah? Another night of birdogging the chickas?
Rachel: 3-2-1 oh!!
Rachel: Im sorry, I cant!
Rachel: I cant!
Rachel: Dont say, "Oh my God!" Oh my God what?
Rachel: I cant. I cant push anymore, I cant.
Rachel: Are you okay?
Rachel: Oh, shes so tiny. (Starts crying) Whered she go?
Rachel: I cant. Please, you do it for me.
Rachel: Oh God!
(Rachel motions for Ross to close the privacy screen, which he does.)
(Dr. Long hands her to Rachel.)
Rachel: No, not yet.
Rachel: Hello baby girl.
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Here. (Hands her to Monica.)
(Everyone except Ross and Rachel leave.)
(Rachel starts crying again.)
Rachel: I was reliving it.
Rachel: Well what are we going to do?
Rachel: Oh honey, but you love that name.
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Oh, just tell us! Were not gonna want it!
Rachel: Well tell us! What are they?
Rachel: Oh, Im not doing it alone. I have Ross.
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: (pause) Right.
Rachel: Nothing.
The Teacher: How would you characterize the theme of this book, uh let's see here (looks at his attendance sheet), Rachel Green?
Ross: Yeah! I dont know. I mean, last year Elizabeth now-now this kid. What-what-what-what is it?! Am I giving out some kind of sexy professor vibe? (Rachel and Joey both look at him.)
Rachel: Really its nothing. Im just
Rachel: (quietly) Yeah. Well. (Pause.) Hey uh Joe, would mind going over to Chandler's bedroom and get that book back that he borrowed from me?
Rachel: Eh, just a tad.
Rachel: Oh please, hell be with his real family, the twins and little miss new boobs.
Rachel: Joey. Honey what would I do without you?
Rachel: Joey.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Joey.
Rachel: Okay, you guys, just relax. (She goes over to open the door, and as she does, she says.) I doooo. (Sees that its Joshua, not Chandler that knocked on the door.)
Rachel: Hes perfect, hes never been better.
Rachel: (seeing the ring) Oh my God. (Pause) Okay.
[Cut back into Rachels room.]
Ross: Hey Joey. (To Rachel) Hey you.
Rachel: Hey you.
Rachel: Uh yeah, actually I kinda need to talk to you too.
Rachel: (seeing the ring) Oh my God. (Pause) Okay.
Rachel: I know, I still need to talk to you.
RACHEL: Well, that doesn't sound like a very merry Christmas.
[Scene: The Anniversary Party, Ross and Rachel are arriving and see his parents.]
Rachel: Hi.
[Scene: Rachels Room, Phoebe is entering.]
Rachel: Really?! Even Ross?
Rachel: I cant say that Im surprised.
Rachel: Well did you know he was gonna ask me?
Rachel: I guess so.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: I mean I think Id say no to anybody right now. (Hearing this Gunther swoops back to cleaning tables.) Oh, but it was so strange. I mean Im standing there with this charming, cute guy, whos asking me to go out with him, which Im allowed to do, and I felt guilty. Y'know, like Id be cheating on Ross or something.
Rachel: Oh look, shes pulling away again! Do you think my nipples are too big for her mouth? (Joey gets embarrassed.) She looks scared. Doesnt she look scared?
Rachel: Im sorry honey, what were you saying?
Rachel: Yknow youre-youre probably wondering about the old date on there.
Rachel: Oh my God! Im standing at a cash register, holding a credit card, and Im bored.
Rachel: (laughs) I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
Phoebe: And so engaged. (Points to the ring that Rachel is wearing.)
Rachel: No! No-no, I love it. Thank you. (Kisses him.)
Rachel: Hey. I need to tell you something.