words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking and Rachel is getting ready for a date with Joshua.]
Rachel: Hey, Mon, if you were hoping to sleep with Joshua the first time tonight, which one of these would you want to be wearing. (Shes holding two frilly, lace nighties.)
Rachel: Sorry. Im so exited! Ive been waiting for this for months! I got my hair coloured! I got new sheets! Im making him a very fancy meal.
Rachel: What am I making him by the way?
Rachel: I thought I was making him filet mignon?
Monica: Yeah, you were, but you decided to make salmon because you had some left over at the restaurant. And then you realised if you (Points at Rachel) bitched about it, then you (Points to herself) would stop cooking, and you (Points at Rachel) would have to make your famous baked potato and Diet Coke.
Rachel: Wow, I really get crabby when I cook.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on her dinner date with Joshua.]
Rachel: Ohh, please! Cooking soothes me. (They kiss.) Ahh. So, dig in!
Rachel: (taking a bite) Hmmm!
Rachel: Oh I know, my God, this is sothis rice is soI am so good.
Rachel: (sees the chick and the duck) Oh, yeah, Im sorry. They used to live here; sometimes they migrate back over.
Rachel: Yeah, sure, okay. Okay.
(Rachel gets up and ushers them into the hall, as they pass Joshua, he leaps onto the counter to avoid them. Rachel drops them off in the hall, and knocks on Joeys door.)
[Cut back to Rachels date.]
Rachel: All gone! So, farm birds, huh?
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: Okay. So, can I serve you a little ofWhat? What? What? (She sees that Joshua isnt relaxed.)
Rachel: But, theyre across the hall! I mean thats two doors away, it would take them a long time to peck their way back over here.
Rachel: Okay, yknow, would you feel better if we went someplace else? I mean we could pack all this stuff up and yknow go to your apartment.
Rachel: Your parents?
Rachel: Ohh.
Rachel: Yeah that works.
[Scene: Joshuas parents apartment, Rachel and Joshua are entering.]
Rachel: Wow! This place is fabulous!
Rachel: Whoa-whoa, theres two living rooms? God, growing up here, this place mustve been a real babe magnet.
Rachel: Ohh, you should know, this place is a real babe magnet. Wanna make out?
Rachel: That sounds like a plan. Umm, is there a place I can go freshen up?
Rachel: Ah.
(They all go into the kitchen. Just then, Rachel comes back from the bathroom; she had removed her dress and is wearing nothing but a lace nightie. She tries to find someplace seductive to wait for Joshua. She tries to sit on the piano, but it makes too much noise. So she goes over to the couch and kinda half lays down to wait for Joshua. Joshua comes in from the kitchen, sees Rachel, and freezes.)
Rachel: Hi you!
Rachel: I know, I can do more than cook.
(Just then, his parents enter. Rachel gasps.)
Joshua: Uhh, Rachel, my parents
Rachel: Ohh! Its so nice to meet you. (She goes over and shakes their hands.) Hello.
Rachel: Hello.
Rachel: What? This-this, no, oh no, no-no-no, this is notthats-thats not what it is. See, see, okay, I work in fashion, see and-and, this is a real dress actually. Its-its, theyre-theyre wearing it in Milan, so part of my job is too wear the clothes, and then I see how people respond, and then I report back to my superiors at Bloomingdales, so And obviously in uh, in-in this case, (She grabs a pen and paper) I am going to report back, "USA not ready."
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: Well, we were going to do that afterI mean umm, next.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, well Yeah, no use wasting this baby, just lyin around the house.
Rachel: Yes.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is telling Phoebe and Monica of her date.]
Rachel: Oh, yeah. And uh, the best part though, when the uh, waiter spilled water down my back, I jumped up, and my boob popped out.
Rachel: No, its all right. I got nice boobs. (Phoebe and Monica nod there heads in agreement.)
Rachel: So?
Rachel: Huh.
Rachel: Shes totally right! When we were together, you got all freaked out about Mark and there was nothing going on.
Rachel: Absolutely! Absolutely!
Rachel: Whatyeahwhat, yknow what? I hope Emily is a lesbian.
Rachel: Okay! I was thinking if its a girl, how about Sandrine? Its French.
Rachel: (confidently) I did!
(Monica smiles to cover her embarrassment, but Rachel sadly looks away...)
Rachel: Jeez!
Rachel: Oh. (smiles) Heres your moisturiser. Hi!
Rachel: How do you think this suit would look on an assistant buyer at Bloomingdales?
Rachel: Its coming from Joey!
Rachel: But y'know, I never really had anything to worry about. Ross was never very good at the flirting thing.
Rachel: Oh, please tell me its not because Im going with Mark.
Rachel: I hope its still funny when youre in hell.
Rachel: No, no, no, wait! Okay, okay. Don't! I'll go, I'll go!
Rachel: Lets do it! Ross?
[Scene: The hallway of Monica's building. Phoebe and Rachel are trying to find the cat's owner.]
Monica: Y'know if its any consolation, he really did sound like he was having more fun with you. (Rachel nods in agreement)
Rachel: (surprised by how ugly it is) Wow! (sarcastic) Oh, she's so nice and big! Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys oh so proudly? (looks around for a spot)
Rachel: On Melanie Griffith in "Working girl". I think what you want is over here.
Rachel: So, I still have boxes here. I still have boxes at Rosss, and I have nowhere to live! Wow. I could so easily freak out right now.
Rachel: (To Ross) You know what? We should call my mum's house and say goodnight to Emma before she goes down.
Rachel: Um, there was a Geller Cup?
Monica: All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet, Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion to poultry.
Rachel: Oh, yes! Well have ourselves a little baby Ruth
Rachel: OK, alright, OK, um... then could you please, uh... just give him a message for me? Please? This is very important.
Rachel: Wait no, honey, honey throw it to me, throw it to me.
Rachel, Chandler, and Joey: What?
Rachel: You dont pick me! Youre stuck with me!
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: Oh, well okay. Well, there you go.
Rachel: (Running to her room.) Hi, Pheebs.
Rachel: (coming over to Ross, who is just getting up) Are you okay?
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Over here!
Rachel: Wait, how long?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are comforting Chandler]
Rachel: Wait, what am I gonna do?
Rachel: Good! I'm glad it's not a problem.
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Itssince youve never done it before you can be Monicas made of honor.
Monica: Uh, Aunt Iris? This is Phoebe, and that's Rachel...
Rachel: You had to do it, didnt you? You couldnt just leave it alone.
Rachel: Can I see that for second.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel are returning.]
Rachel: Ohh, I love Joey! Joey lives with a duck! (Goes and hugs Joey.)
Rachel: Now, does it really matter?
Rachel: You know what honey, you go ahead, well call her an alternate.
Rachel: Can you not look at me when I say this? (He turns around) I thought that if I could get you here, I could seduce you.
Rachel: Down at the docks again?
Rachel: Oh no, you guys, just stay here, Im gonna go check her diaper, Pheebs you wanna come?
Rachel: Ohh!
Rachel: I went really long.
Rachel: Oh, its okay. (starts to leave)
(Monica pushes him off of the sofa as Rachel enters with a shopping bag.)
Rachel: Hm-mm.
Rachel: Oh, good, good! We had this idea to make a birthday video for Emma and we'll give it to her when she is 18.
[Scene: after the wedding, Ross and Rachel are in the lobby]
Rachel: Yeah!!! Kill um!!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is writing a letter by the bay window as Rachel enters.]
RACHEL: Phoebe's dead.
Rachel: When did you go to a sperm bank?
Rachel: Im so sorry! Are you okay?
Rachel: Thank you! Break!
Rachel: And heels.
Rachel: Oh, I don't know. I guess it's not about no guys, it's about the right guy, y'know? I mean, with Barry, it was safe and it was easy, but there was no heat. With Paolo, that's all there was, was heat! And it was just this raw, animal, sexual...
Rachel: Thats not her name! Im sorry, she just doesnt feel like an Isabella.
Chandler: (in a manly voice) Yeah well, Im gonna go spit. (He goes into the bedroom. On his way out, Joey gives Rachel a wide berth.)
Rachel: (to Chandler) Eh, do you believe that?
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: What?
Gunther: Rachel?
Rachel: (entering) Hey Ross? Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-and uh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought.
Rachel: I know I had it this morning, and I know I had it when I was in the kitchen with...
Rachel: No, hey, come on, if he asked you first, thats only fair. (leaves)
Rachel: Well Phoebe, we gotta do something! (They turn the corner.) Well, yknow. I mean theres no way Joeys gonna make it in time. So Im gonna through the hotel and see if theres any other weddings going on.
RACHEL: Would you let me talk. [flicks Monica on the forehead]
Ross: Dude. Well done. You know what? If I die, and Rachel dies and Monica dies then you can totally take care of Emma.
Rachel: Well that works out good, because I'm not listening.
Phoebe: No! Because hes in love with the British chippy! Look, Rachel, if you go, youre just gonna mess with his head and ruin his wedding! Yknow, its too late! You missed youre chance! Im sorry, I know this must be really hard, its over.
Rachel: Oh. Oh, its beautiful. I see it now.
RACHEL: Only 'cause you took up half the circle.
[Scene: The hallway after the party. Rachel is sitting there.]
RACHEL: No no, 'cause mayo, that would make it gross.
RACHEL: Yeah, well just be glad he's not playing a smaller instrument.
Ross: No-no, Im Im sure no one was looking. Just want some privacy. (He closes the screen and stares wide-eyed at Rachel.)
[cut to Gunther retraining Rachel.]
Rachel: Well, it is, all right? When we were out there today, all I kept thinking was: I can't believe Chandler is screwing this woman, but MAN this would be a nice place to live!
Rachel: The fear?
Rachel: Yeah.
Gunther: Rachel?
Rachel: Fine! Im sorry for your loss! (Hands it back to her.)
Rachel: Gunther, I quit.
Rachel: Oh how can you possibly know? Look at this mess, Tag! I mean, this is what Im talking about! You have to be organized! Youve got newspapers! Youve got magazines! You gotOhh! (Finds a picture.) And who is this chippy? A little young for you Tag, but whatever.
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Thanks.
Ross: You never cooked since 1996. (Actually Rachel cooked in �609 - TOW Ross Got High�, first aired 1999-11-25.)
Rachel: (worried) Okay please, youre kidding right?! I wrote that one as a joke for you!
Rachel: Oh... okay, just hide!
[Cut to Living Room, Rachel is sleeping on the couch, Ross is gone, the rest of them can finally emerge from their cell. They all wave good bye, and start to walk quietly out, as Monica goes and puts a blanket on Rachel. Joey starts walking all hunched over and bobbing his shoulders as he goes.]
Monica: Hey, you better hope that we're pregnant, because one way or another, we're giving a baby back to Rachel.
Gavin: Thank god you finally said that, I saw you make a note on your pad three hours ago. (Rachel throws away that paper) Man, I really bug you, don't I?
Joey: (To Rachel) Well look, hey, it's all your fault!
Rachel: Oooh, honey, you're not a total loser.
Ross: Oh, thank you. (She goes to kiss him, but he holds her coat up between their faces to stop her.) Hey, hey. (opens the door, sees Rachel, and hides Chloe behind the door) Rachel!!!!