words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is talking to a customer.]
Rachel: Okay, okay, I checked. We have: Earl Grey, English Breakfast, Cinnamon Stick, Camomile, Mint Medley, Blackberry, and.. oh, wait, there's one more, um.. Lemon Soother. You're not the guy that asked for the tea, are you? (Guy shakes his head) Okay.
Monica: Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.
Rachel: Thank you. (Examines it) Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!
Rachel: Oh. Right. ...Oh great.
Rachel: Country club newsletter. My mother sends me the engagement notices for 'inspiration.' Oh my God! Oh my God, it's Barry and Mindy!
Rachel: Barry who I almost.
Rachel: Mindy, my maid of. Oh!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Ross are eating Chinese.]
Ross: Marcel. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Good boy. Good boy. C'mere, gimme the rice. (Marcel brings the rice) Thank you, good boy. Well, I see he's finally mastered the difference between 'bring me the' and 'pee in the'. (Rachel ignores him) 'Bring me the' and- Rach?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, this is so stupid! I mean, I gave Barry up, right? I should be happy for them! I am, I'm happy for them.
Rachel: No. Oh, oh, I guess it would be different if I were- with somebody.
Rachel: Oh, I don't know. I guess it's not about no guys, it's about the right guy, y'know? I mean, with Barry, it was safe and it was easy, but there was no heat. With Paolo, that's all there was, was heat! And it was just this raw, animal, sexual...
Rachel: Well, I mean, do you think you can ever have both? Y'know? Someone who's like, who's like your best friend, but then also can make your toes curl?
Rachel: Hi, how was the movie?
Rachel: (To Marcel) And I will see you tomorrow!
Chandler: I mean, don't you think if things were gonna happen with Rachel, they would've happened already?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is taking care of Marcel and they are watching a soap opera.]
Rachel: Now, now the one in the feather boa, that's Dr. Francis. Now, she used to be a man. Okay, now look, see, there's Raven. We hate her. We're glad she's dying. Okay- (Marcel pushes down a cushion to reveal a shoe) Wh- wh- Marcel, are you playing with Monica's shoes? You know you're not supposed to pl- whoah. Marcel, did you poo in the shoe? (Takes the shoe into the kitchen) Marcel, bad monkey! Oh! Oh! (She notices the newsletter and taps the contents of the shoes onto it, then folds it shut) Sorry, Barry. Little engagement gift. I'm sure you didn't register for that. (She leaves the apartment holding the newsletter at arm's length. However, she leaves the door open. Marcel runs out in the opposite direction. There is a shot from the TV and Rachel runs back in) Who died? Who died? Roll him over! Oh, c'mon, roll him over! Oh...! Well, we know it wasn't Dexter, right Marcel? Because- (Looks down and notices he is missing) Marcel? Marc- (Notices the open door)
Rachel: I don't know. We were watching TV, and then he pooped in Monica's shoe-
Rachel: I don't know. The left one.
Rachel: Oh. Oh, those little clunky Amish things you think go with everything.
Chandler: Rachel lost Marcel.
Rachel: C'mon, you guys, what're we gonna do, what're we gonna do?
Rachel: Oh, my, God, c'mon, you guys! He's gonna be home any minute! He's gonna kill me!
Rachel: Well, what'm I gonna do? What'm I gonna do?
Rachel: Anybody wanna trade? Oh...
Rachel: (On the phone) Okay, he's a, he's a black capuchian monkey with a white face... (Enter Ross) ...with, with Russian dressing and, and pickles on the side. Okay. Thanks.
Rachel: Great! It went great. Really great. Hey, is that wine?
Rachel: Oh, I would love some. But y'know what? Y'know what? Let's not drink it here. I'm feeling kinda crazy. You wanna go to Newark?
Rachel: Oh God, Ross, I cannot do this.
Rachel: Oh God... Okay. Alright. Alright. Okay. Ross, please don't hate me.
Rachel: Y'know Marcel?
Rachel: Well, I kind of... I kind of lost him.
Rachel: I know, I know, I'm sorry-
Rachel: (Tearfully) Ross, I'm doing everything that I can, I've got everybody looking for him, and I- (Door buzzer goes and she runs to get it) Oh! Who is it?
Rachel: See? I've even called Animal Control!
Rachel: Uh-huh... why... do you not like them?
Rachel: O-okay, now see, you never ever ever told us that...
(A knock on the door. Rachel swiftly opens it)
Rachel: Hi, thanks for coming.
Rachel: Oh, y'know what? That was a complete misunderstanding! (Ross puts his arms around her and they act all sweetness and light)
Rachel: Turned out it was a hat.
Rachel: Cat! What'm I saying? Cat!
Luisa: Oh my God, you are! And you're Rachel Green!
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Luisa? Oh my God! Monica! It's Luisa!
Rachel: Yes!!
Rachel: None.
Luisa: Ah, it's not so much you, you were fat, you had your own problems. (To Rachel) But you? What a bitch!
Rachel: What?!
[Cut to Marcel walking along a hallway. He notices a banana on the floor and picks it up. The hand of an unseen person grabs him and carries him away. Then cut to Ross and Rachel on the street outside.]
Rachel: Marcel?
Rachel: Ross, you don't know that.
Rachel: Ross, I said I'm sorry like a million times. What do you want me to do? You want me to break my foot too? Okay, I'm gonna break my foot, right here. (Kicks the sign) Ow!! Oh! Oh my God, oh my God! There, are you happy now?!
Rachel: Y'know, it is not like I did this on purpose.
Ross: Oh, no no no. Nono, this is just vintage Rachel. I mean, things just sort of happen around you. I mean, you're off in Rachel-land, doing your Rachel-thing, totally oblivious to people's monkeys, or to people's feelings...
Rachel: Ross.
Rachel: Ross.
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: Then what's with all the bananas?
Rachel: Oh, c'mon, Luisa!
Ross: (To Rachel) You had to be a bitch in high school, you couldn't've been fat.
Rachel: Alright. In high school I was the prom queen and I was the homecoming queen and the class president and you... were also there! But if you take this monkey, I will lose one of the most important people in my life. You can hate me if you want, but please do not punish him. C'mon, Luisa, you have a chance to be the bigger person here! Take it!
Rachel: Alright. Well then how about I call your supervisor, and I tell her that you shot my friend in the ass with a dart?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Rachel and Ross are there. Ross is trying to get the dress off Marcel.]
Rachel: Y'know, with the right pair of pumps, that would be a great little outfit.
Rachel: Oh, Ross, c'mon. It's my fault, I almost lost your...
Rachel: That'd be good.
Ross: Alright. (He goes to get the glasses. Then he hesitates and turns off the main light. Rachel looks round and he acts surprised) The, uh, the neighbours must be vacuuming. (He sits down and starts to pour the wine) Well, so long as we're here and, uh, not on the subject, I was thinking about, uh, how mad we got at each other before, and, um, I was thinking maybe it was partially because of how we, um...
Barry: Rachel.
Rachel: Barry?!
Ross and Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: But it was beautiful. I mean it was small, but kind of spectacular.
Rachel: Joey, honey, I dont think youre supposed to go back there.
Rachel: Should I be concerned that a button fell off the old Hugsy and I can't find it?
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Joey, it's okay. Settle down.
Rachel: Okay, hold on just a second. (She grabs a camera out of the desk and takes his picture.) Im sorry, its for human resources, everybody has to do it. Could you just stand up please?
[Cut to Ross getting of an elevator carrying a bouquet of flowers and walking down the hall to Rachels room.]
Rachel: But honey he calls everybody by a nickname! Okay, look, I know, all right, just one dinner, please, just one night for me, please. I just want him to love you like I do. (Ross looks at her) All right, well not exactly like I do, but, but, if you do come to dinner, Ill love you like I do in that black thing that you like.
Chandler: Oh-ho-ho-ho-no! No! No switching! No sharing, and dont come crying to me! Ha-ha-ha! I may just sit here and have my cake all day! Just sit here in the hallway and eat my (Rachel knocks the plate from his hand and it falls on the floor. That process leaves just the forkful Chandler has, Rachel starts to go after that little bit and Chandler retreats into his apartment.)
Chandler: (to Kim and Nancy) Oh, hi! Excuse me, is uh Rachel Green here? I was supposed to meet her for lunch.
[Scene: The Hotel Lobby, Rachel and Phoebe are at the front desk checking out.]
[Scene: Rachels outer office, shes returning with two coffee cups in hand to find Tag sitting there.]
[Scene: The Recovery Room, Rachel is putting Emma down for a nap.]
Rachel: Ross, shes not weird, she just wants her stuff to be one of a kind.
Rachel: I've never given her a cookie. Have you?
[Scene: The smoker's balcony, Rachel is out to join Kim and Nancy.]
Rachel: Well, he's coming from Jersey, he said he would get here as fast as he could!
Rachel: (whispering) Why? (Monica gesticulates mumbling something that starts with "because") Seriously I did not understand a word that you said.
(Ross, Rachel and Joey come back from the bathroom. They discover that Monica and Ethan aren't finished talking to each other yet.)
Rachel: Oh you did, there are twenty in here.
Estelle: How do you do. (to Rachel and Monica) Ooh, you two girls were outstanding! (to Joey) Did they have representation?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, breakfast is finished but Rachels still down.]
Rachel: Okay! Okay wait! You listen to me! You listen to me! Since I have been waiting four women, thats four, one higher than the number of centimeters that I am dilated, have come and gone with their babies! Im next! Its my turn! Its only fair! And if you bring in one woman and she has her baby before me Im going to sue you! Not this hospital, Im going to sue you! And my husband (Points at Ross) hes a lawyer!
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Joey and Rachel are eating spaghetti in the living room while watching TV and Rachel drops some on the floor.]
Rachel: You're right! I mean you're right! It wasn't just the Weebles, but it was the Weeble Play Palace, and and the Weebles' Cruise Ship. Oh, which had this little lifeboat for the Weebles to wobble in.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang, except Rachel, is watching a new singer.]
Rachel: Yeah, they were very y'know wrestley. But, I guess that's normal?
Ross: No, of course, Um Um, everybody? Um, I-I just wanted to say on behalf of my new bride, Rachel (She turns around and smiles), and myself. Umm, that if if in 35 years, were half as happy as you guys are, well count ourselves the luckiest people in the world.
Rachel: Ooooh! Honey, well we'll find you something. Do you wanna wear my black jacket?
Rachel: Yeah, and none of these stupid grocery questions, real personal questions.
Rachel: (on tape) I-I knowI had put them in in-in my desk at work and I completely forgot about them until today.
Rachel: Well, does a good student drink seven beers during his first lesson?
Rachel: Jealous of what? Of your lack of responsiblity? You, your immaturity? Your total disregard of other people's feelings?
RACHEL: Oh they're in the top drawer. Hurry.
Rachel: All right. We figured you might respond this way, so we have a backup offer.
[Scene: Restaurant, Rachel and Ross and Dr. Green are having dinner.]
Rachel: It's not! I'm defrosting a chicken. (Pause) Oh, I uh sold Mrs. Whiskerson.
Rachel: Hey, how are those tapes working out for ya?
RACHEL: (singing) "...marenge, thank you honey, and do the cha-cha. And while she like to be a star, Tony always tended bar. At the, wait, wait, everybody.."
Rachel: Oh, that�s what this is all about? Did you bring her up here to get back at me?
Rachel: It's open! (Joey walks in) Hi, Joe!
Rachel: Okay. Uh, want something-want something to drink?
Rachel: (interrupting) I bet he sensed that I was ready to have sex with another guy.
Rachel: (gets up from the sofa and moves to the kitchen but Joey blocks her way) Oh, sorry... Oops, sorry.
Monica: All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4, (Rachel starts getting worked up) 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7, 7.. 7 7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7 (mouths 7)! (They both lean back on the couch satisfied.)
Rachel: Just give us our apartment back!
[Scene: The porch, Bonnie is coming back from swimming, Rachel is reading.]
Rachel: Oh, I have to go tell Monica what a wonderful brother she has! (Kisses him on the cheek and exits.)
Mr. Waltham: Rachel, one of your customers seems to have left his billfold. A Joshua Bergen.
Rachel: Ahh .So Wow The spring line, its really going to be great this year, huh?
Rachel: And you just get to be cool Aunt Phoebe!
Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
Rachel: Better than Chandler. (Phoebe exhales as if to say, "Like what isnt?")
RACHEL: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late.
Rachel: She didn't hang up either!
[Flashback scene from last week, Monica and Chandler's kitchen, Rachel, Ross, Monica and Chandler are there.]
Rachel: Yknow, bonus night. Yknow, when two people break up but they get back together for just one night.
Rachel: I know you did! I bought the same one! And if she sees your table shes gonna know that I lied to her. I told her ours was an original.
Rachel: And I hope Barry doesn't kill you and eat you in Aruba.
Rachel: Man in the black dress (Monica walks away and Rachel looks around to find a woman in a black dress.) (To her) Hi! Im Rachel! Im a friend of Monica and Chandlers!
Ross: (entering) Hey is Rachel here? We have a doctors appointment.
Rachel: So that there will be a decent place for me to sit.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, The Halloween party has started. Monica is setting out some food as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Um, excuse me Gavin, I have a question I need to ask you.
Rachel: Well, it wasn't just me, alright? He freaked out too! He couldn't even undo my bra!
Rachel: Well, sure! Come in! (He enters) Well, what-what happened to your girlfriend?
Rachel: Phoebe, come on! What is the big deal? I thought this was going to be something we could do together! Y'know, I thought it would be fun!
Rachel: Its a truffle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch, [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef sauteed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Chandler are eating the cheesecake right out of the box.]
Rachel: Hi! (He hands her, her mail) Thanks, hey so uh whatd you do last night?
Joey: Hey-hey, Pheebs, check it out, we already learned a song. (To Rachel) Ready? One, two, three, four...
Rachel: Hi! So Im out having lunch at Monicas and this guy starts talking to me, and it turns out he works for a buyer at Bloomingdales and there happens to be an opening in his department. So I gave him my phone number and hes gonna call me this weekend to see if he can get me an interview!
Phoebe: Ok, so this is pretty much what's happened so far. Ross was in love with Rachel since, you know, forever, but every time he tried to tell her, something kind of got in the way, like cats, and Italian guys. Finally Chandler was like "forget about her" but when Ross was in China on his dig, Chandler let it slip that Ross was in love with Rachel. She was like, "Oh my god." So she went to the airport to meet him when he came back, but what she didn't know was, that Ross was getting off the plane with another woman. Uh-Oh! So, that's pretty much everything you need to know. But, enough about us. So, how've you been?
Rachel: Yeah! You know, ever since I had that dream about him, and can't get it out of my head! And what's the big deal, people do it all the time!
Rachel: Okay, umm, Im gonna get my sweater. (Walks away.)
Rachel: Shoot. Oh, I can't believe I did this!
Rachel: Oh no Dr. Long, please come in. This is Ross, he is the father.
Phoebe: Oh, just look at her... (girls move toward Rachel on the balcony)
Rachel: (on the couch) Oh hi! Yknow, I just wanted to see if there were any leads on the old job front.
Rachel: I'm not crazy, right? I mean, it was never like that.
Rachel: Yeah? I'm sorry about your girlfriend.
Rachel: Yeah, I just get a little bummed when my birthday's over.
RACHEL: Well, you have been in our lives for nearly two months now and we don't really know you. I mean, who is Julie? I mean, what do you like, what don't you like? We wanna hear everything.
[Scene: Rachel and Joey's apartment. It's just Ross and Rachel. They put the camera on a tripod in the kitchen and they are standing in front of the camera.]
Rachel: Joey relax! My mother picked her up two hours ago. You were there!
RACHEL: Look you guys, I have to go, I'm the Maid-of-Honor. And besides you know what I just need to be in a room again with these people and feel good about myself.
Rachel: I know, I mean, why can't parents just stay parents? (She walks over near Chandler and his gaze stays very obviously on her chest) Why do they have to become people? Why do they have... (Notices Chandler) Why can't you stop staring at my breasts?
Ross: Oh, yeah, last week you had a wonderful, nutty, chocolatey kind of a cakey pie thing. (Rachel gives him a dirty look) Nothing, just, just, I'm fine.
Phoebe and Rachel: DANGER!!!!!
Phoebe: Ok. Do we have to talk like that then they're not around? (She sees Rachel) Oh, no, no! Listen, is there someone who can fill in for me?
RACHEL: Agh, what a jerk. I kept talking about you and he kept asking me out. I mean, naturally, you know, I said no.
Rachel: Oh my God, look-look hes taking off her clothes!
Rachel: Hi. Sorry, things arent working out so well.
Rachel: This is the worst date ever. How could you set me up with this creep?
Rachel: Oh, wow thanks! (Reading the card) Oh youre in real estate!
Rachel: (gets it) Oh. Yes! I would so move out!
Rachel: Oh, come on Joey! You will totally keep it in check this time, and plus yknow the publicity would be really good for your career! And you deserve that! And if you do the interview you can mention, oh I dont know, gal pal Rachel Green?
(Phoebe scoots her chair over to Rachel and hugs her)
Rachel: Oh, I dont know. I guess we have to eat.
Rachel: Oh, you are losing. Definitely losing. (phone rings)