words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is talking to a customer.]
Rachel: Okay, okay, I checked. We have: Earl Grey, English Breakfast, Cinnamon Stick, Camomile, Mint Medley, Blackberry, and.. oh, wait, there's one more, um.. Lemon Soother. You're not the guy that asked for the tea, are you? (Guy shakes his head) Okay.
Monica: Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.
Rachel: Thank you. (Examines it) Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!
Rachel: Oh. Right. ...Oh great.
Rachel: Country club newsletter. My mother sends me the engagement notices for 'inspiration.' Oh my God! Oh my God, it's Barry and Mindy!
Rachel: Barry who I almost.
Rachel: Mindy, my maid of. Oh!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Ross are eating Chinese.]
Ross: Marcel. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Good boy. Good boy. C'mere, gimme the rice. (Marcel brings the rice) Thank you, good boy. Well, I see he's finally mastered the difference between 'bring me the' and 'pee in the'. (Rachel ignores him) 'Bring me the' and- Rach?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, this is so stupid! I mean, I gave Barry up, right? I should be happy for them! I am, I'm happy for them.
Rachel: No. Oh, oh, I guess it would be different if I were- with somebody.
Rachel: Oh, I don't know. I guess it's not about no guys, it's about the right guy, y'know? I mean, with Barry, it was safe and it was easy, but there was no heat. With Paolo, that's all there was, was heat! And it was just this raw, animal, sexual...
Rachel: Well, I mean, do you think you can ever have both? Y'know? Someone who's like, who's like your best friend, but then also can make your toes curl?
Rachel: Hi, how was the movie?
Rachel: (To Marcel) And I will see you tomorrow!
Chandler: I mean, don't you think if things were gonna happen with Rachel, they would've happened already?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is taking care of Marcel and they are watching a soap opera.]
Rachel: Now, now the one in the feather boa, that's Dr. Francis. Now, she used to be a man. Okay, now look, see, there's Raven. We hate her. We're glad she's dying. Okay- (Marcel pushes down a cushion to reveal a shoe) Wh- wh- Marcel, are you playing with Monica's shoes? You know you're not supposed to pl- whoah. Marcel, did you poo in the shoe? (Takes the shoe into the kitchen) Marcel, bad monkey! Oh! Oh! (She notices the newsletter and taps the contents of the shoes onto it, then folds it shut) Sorry, Barry. Little engagement gift. I'm sure you didn't register for that. (She leaves the apartment holding the newsletter at arm's length. However, she leaves the door open. Marcel runs out in the opposite direction. There is a shot from the TV and Rachel runs back in) Who died? Who died? Roll him over! Oh, c'mon, roll him over! Oh...! Well, we know it wasn't Dexter, right Marcel? Because- (Looks down and notices he is missing) Marcel? Marc- (Notices the open door)
Rachel: I don't know. We were watching TV, and then he pooped in Monica's shoe-
Rachel: I don't know. The left one.
Rachel: Oh. Oh, those little clunky Amish things you think go with everything.
Chandler: Rachel lost Marcel.
Rachel: C'mon, you guys, what're we gonna do, what're we gonna do?
Rachel: Oh, my, God, c'mon, you guys! He's gonna be home any minute! He's gonna kill me!
Rachel: Well, what'm I gonna do? What'm I gonna do?
Rachel: Anybody wanna trade? Oh...
Rachel: (On the phone) Okay, he's a, he's a black capuchian monkey with a white face... (Enter Ross) ...with, with Russian dressing and, and pickles on the side. Okay. Thanks.
Rachel: Great! It went great. Really great. Hey, is that wine?
Rachel: Oh, I would love some. But y'know what? Y'know what? Let's not drink it here. I'm feeling kinda crazy. You wanna go to Newark?
Rachel: Oh God, Ross, I cannot do this.
Rachel: Oh God... Okay. Alright. Alright. Okay. Ross, please don't hate me.
Rachel: Y'know Marcel?
Rachel: Well, I kind of... I kind of lost him.
Rachel: I know, I know, I'm sorry-
Rachel: (Tearfully) Ross, I'm doing everything that I can, I've got everybody looking for him, and I- (Door buzzer goes and she runs to get it) Oh! Who is it?
Rachel: See? I've even called Animal Control!
Rachel: Uh-huh... why... do you not like them?
Rachel: O-okay, now see, you never ever ever told us that...
(A knock on the door. Rachel swiftly opens it)
Rachel: Hi, thanks for coming.
Rachel: Oh, y'know what? That was a complete misunderstanding! (Ross puts his arms around her and they act all sweetness and light)
Rachel: Turned out it was a hat.
Rachel: Cat! What'm I saying? Cat!
Luisa: Oh my God, you are! And you're Rachel Green!
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Luisa? Oh my God! Monica! It's Luisa!
Rachel: Yes!!
Rachel: None.
Luisa: Ah, it's not so much you, you were fat, you had your own problems. (To Rachel) But you? What a bitch!
Rachel: What?!
[Cut to Marcel walking along a hallway. He notices a banana on the floor and picks it up. The hand of an unseen person grabs him and carries him away. Then cut to Ross and Rachel on the street outside.]
Rachel: Marcel?
Rachel: Ross, you don't know that.
Rachel: Ross, I said I'm sorry like a million times. What do you want me to do? You want me to break my foot too? Okay, I'm gonna break my foot, right here. (Kicks the sign) Ow!! Oh! Oh my God, oh my God! There, are you happy now?!
Rachel: Y'know, it is not like I did this on purpose.
Ross: Oh, no no no. Nono, this is just vintage Rachel. I mean, things just sort of happen around you. I mean, you're off in Rachel-land, doing your Rachel-thing, totally oblivious to people's monkeys, or to people's feelings...
Rachel: Ross.
Rachel: Ross.
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: Then what's with all the bananas?
Rachel: Oh, c'mon, Luisa!
Ross: (To Rachel) You had to be a bitch in high school, you couldn't've been fat.
Rachel: Alright. In high school I was the prom queen and I was the homecoming queen and the class president and you... were also there! But if you take this monkey, I will lose one of the most important people in my life. You can hate me if you want, but please do not punish him. C'mon, Luisa, you have a chance to be the bigger person here! Take it!
Rachel: Alright. Well then how about I call your supervisor, and I tell her that you shot my friend in the ass with a dart?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Rachel and Ross are there. Ross is trying to get the dress off Marcel.]
Rachel: Y'know, with the right pair of pumps, that would be a great little outfit.
Rachel: Oh, Ross, c'mon. It's my fault, I almost lost your...
Rachel: That'd be good.
Ross: Alright. (He goes to get the glasses. Then he hesitates and turns off the main light. Rachel looks round and he acts surprised) The, uh, the neighbours must be vacuuming. (He sits down and starts to pour the wine) Well, so long as we're here and, uh, not on the subject, I was thinking about, uh, how mad we got at each other before, and, um, I was thinking maybe it was partially because of how we, um...
Barry: Rachel.
Rachel: Barry?!
Ross and Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: Oh! Hey, Mr. Treeger.
Rachel: (entering) Hey!
Rachel: Hey, Monica!
Rachel: No! Help me!
Rachel: Phoebe?
Rachel: Oh-oh, sorry, its this way, its this way. (Motions to the correct way.)
Rachel: Yeah, and could you please chop some up and just put it right there in the sauce?
Rachel: Ugh!
Rachel: So .
Rachel: Im Rachel Green.
Rachel: Oh well, no I
Rachel: Ohhhh, come on!!!
Rachel: Ohh, youve waited soo long.
Rachel: Ill get her.
[Scene: Rosss bedroom, Rachel getting into bed while Ross is reading and laughs.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Ross is telling Rachel and Monica about yet another mistake hes made with a woman.]
Rachel: Uh- which one of us are you talking to there, Barr?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to move Joeys chair and not having much luck at it as Joey enters.]
Rachel: This is such a great party! 35 years. Very impressive, do you guys have any pearls of wisdom?
Rachel: Honey, thats youre name.
Rachel: Oh, yknow, would you just for once, not remember every little thing!! (Storms out.)
Rachel: Ohh, he's married! Ross is married. I can'tI still can't believe it. (Rachel grabs the picture from Monica)
Rachel: Fancy soap? I thought we were savin that for the Pope!
Julie: (To Rachel) Oh, you're losin' your apron here, let me get it. There you go. (Ties it back up for her)
Rachel: I'm sorry, you know, maybe I wasn't being clear. Uh, this is our cart.
Rachel: Sophisticated like a hooker?
RACHEL: And then Jean-Claude took me to that place Crossroads and that's where we hung out with Drew Barrymore.
(He gets up and gives Monica a rather passionate kiss as Rachel and Phoebe look on in amazement. After the kiss ends, Chandler suddenly realizes what he just did, so he decides to do something rather rash.)
Rachel: No, I dont.
Rachel: Its Joshua.
Rachel: (taking the brush back) Okay. Lets use this brush. (Hands him another one.)
Rachel: Oh, hey!
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Yeah, I
Rachel: Joshua.
Rachel: Yes, Joey, I remember, she's annoying, but you know what she's-she's his girlfriend now. I mean what can we do?
Rachel: Basketball!
Rachel: No! Not at all!
Rachel: Hmm.
Rachel: Guess who we ran into today?!
Rachel: I don't know, I just kinda ran into him last night.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Sandy sit on the couch. Sandy holds Emma. Ross enters the apartment. Sandy and Rachel wipe their tears away with handkerchiefs]
[Scene: Rachels Bedroom, Ross is finishing up her make-up.]
Rachel: What? Ross and Charlie? (Joey nods) Wow! She's really making her way through the group, huh? Ah, who am I to talk?
RACHEL: I know. And Mom, I realize you and Daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything, but this is just so much better for me, you know?
Ross: What, now youre not even taking to me? (moves over to the coffee table) Look Rachel, I-Im sorry, okay, Im sorry, I was out of my mind. I thought Id lost you, I didnt know what to do. Come on! Come on, how insane must I have been to do something like this? Huh? I-I dont cheat right, I, thats not me, Im not Joey!
Mark: Sure, sure. (To Ross) What's with the chair. (Rachel signals him not to mention she's been fired)
RACHEL: Monica, what are you talking about? You don't know the first thing about the stock market.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure, it's umm... (she picks up this bug and it starts to play the theme from Love Story)
Rachel: Well, wait a minute, youre the boss! Why dont you just yell at them? Or, fire them?
Rachel: (on tape) (Ross hands her a glass of wine) I cannot believe that I did this. Especially after Monica just went on and on and on about it! (Mimicking Monica) "Okay Rachel! Here are the invitations Rachel! Now be very careful Rachel! Please, drinking no liquids around the invitations Rachel!" (She tilts her wine glass above and moves it back and forth across the invitations) Whoa oh! Oh-oh-oh! Oh oh-oh-oh
(Rachel laughs hysterically for no reason.)
Rachel: (grabbing the magazine out of his hands) Call her! Call her now!
MONICA: No, no, not a party. Just a surprise gathering of some people Rachel knows. Um, this is Phoebe and Chandler and Joey.
Rachel: Okay, see, see, you guys, what if we don't get magic beans? I mean, what if all we've got are.. beans?
RACHEL: Oh, what a load of crap. That is a dot. Your mother is up in heaven going, 'Where the hell is my lily, you wuss?' OK, Phoebe, that is not a tattoo, this is a tattoo. [she bends over and bears her tattoo right when Ross returns]
Rachel: Oh, thank goodness!
[Scene: Garbage room: Mr. Treeger is unclogging the trash chute as Rachel enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Rachel are there.]
Rachel: Oh Monica that was the best Thanksgiving dinner ever! I think you killed us.
(Rachel comes out from their apartment with a mirror and a lipstick in her hands)
Rachel: Chandler, Im not gonna lie to ya, but I am gonna run away from you. (Gets up and hurries out.)
RACHEL: Ok honey, you really need a job.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
Rachel: Oh, I beg to differ. The Pictionary incident?
Phoebe: Ooh that is definitely Chandler, Joey, or Ross. (Thinks) Or-or Rachel!
Rachel: But you-you said black. Why would he want his blue blazer black?
Rachel: Well honey, then why don't you break up with one of them?
Rachel: Okay, okay, okay should I be scared?
Phoebe and Rachel: Yes, we should. I think we should.
Rachel: (refers to the table) What are these?
Rachel: Because he's stealing from me!
[Scene: Rachel and Monica's, everyone is getting ready to go to a banquet]
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: And did you?!
RACHEL: I just can't believe this is happening. I mean, when I was little, everybody's parents were getting divorced. I just figured as a grownup I wouldn't have to worry about this.
Rachel: Oh my God.
Rachel: Phoebe the father is not here okay? I havent told him yet and I dont think I can tell him at all now!
Rachel: Uh-uh-uh, right now? Because Ive kinda got an el fresco situation going on over here.
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Rachel: Thank God.
Rachel: And you know which one we should see? The 1996 Tony award winner. Do you happen to know the name of that one?
Rachel: Amy! Hi! Oh-oh-hoh! (they hug) Wow! You remember Joey?
Rachel: Thanks for lunch, Chandler. Y'know, you didnt have to walk me all the way back up here.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is watching TV, but turns it off, and Rachel is sleeping on the couch. Ross puts a blanket over her.]
Rachel: Yeah, I-I heard. (Pause, everyone looks at each other, waiting for Rachels reaction.) I think its great! (Hugs Ross.) Ohh, Im so happy for you!
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Oh wait, dont you have to pay for your, (looks at his magazine) Busty Ladies?
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh no-no, no-no, they dont want you to put your hands in the pockets until you are out of the store.
Rachel: Oh?
Rachel: I know!
Rachel: Okay, first of all, if you keep calling it that, no one's gonna ever take it. Then, second of all you're not actually gonna have sex with him! You're just gonna make him think that you are.
Rachel: Okay, my boss, Joanna, when you left, she started asking questions about you...
Rachel: Surprise!!!
Rachel: Well, it was all Rosss idea.
Rachel: Up!
Rachel: What?
Rachel: What? Youre leaving?!
Rachel: Hes not 11!
Rachel: Okay, my turn!!