words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is talking to a customer.]
Rachel: Okay, okay, I checked. We have: Earl Grey, English Breakfast, Cinnamon Stick, Camomile, Mint Medley, Blackberry, and.. oh, wait, there's one more, um.. Lemon Soother. You're not the guy that asked for the tea, are you? (Guy shakes his head) Okay.
Monica: Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.
Rachel: Thank you. (Examines it) Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!
Rachel: Oh. Right. ...Oh great.
Rachel: Country club newsletter. My mother sends me the engagement notices for 'inspiration.' Oh my God! Oh my God, it's Barry and Mindy!
Rachel: Barry who I almost.
Rachel: Mindy, my maid of. Oh!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Ross are eating Chinese.]
Ross: Marcel. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Good boy. Good boy. C'mere, gimme the rice. (Marcel brings the rice) Thank you, good boy. Well, I see he's finally mastered the difference between 'bring me the' and 'pee in the'. (Rachel ignores him) 'Bring me the' and- Rach?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, this is so stupid! I mean, I gave Barry up, right? I should be happy for them! I am, I'm happy for them.
Rachel: No. Oh, oh, I guess it would be different if I were- with somebody.
Rachel: Oh, I don't know. I guess it's not about no guys, it's about the right guy, y'know? I mean, with Barry, it was safe and it was easy, but there was no heat. With Paolo, that's all there was, was heat! And it was just this raw, animal, sexual...
Rachel: Well, I mean, do you think you can ever have both? Y'know? Someone who's like, who's like your best friend, but then also can make your toes curl?
Rachel: Hi, how was the movie?
Rachel: (To Marcel) And I will see you tomorrow!
Chandler: I mean, don't you think if things were gonna happen with Rachel, they would've happened already?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is taking care of Marcel and they are watching a soap opera.]
Rachel: Now, now the one in the feather boa, that's Dr. Francis. Now, she used to be a man. Okay, now look, see, there's Raven. We hate her. We're glad she's dying. Okay- (Marcel pushes down a cushion to reveal a shoe) Wh- wh- Marcel, are you playing with Monica's shoes? You know you're not supposed to pl- whoah. Marcel, did you poo in the shoe? (Takes the shoe into the kitchen) Marcel, bad monkey! Oh! Oh! (She notices the newsletter and taps the contents of the shoes onto it, then folds it shut) Sorry, Barry. Little engagement gift. I'm sure you didn't register for that. (She leaves the apartment holding the newsletter at arm's length. However, she leaves the door open. Marcel runs out in the opposite direction. There is a shot from the TV and Rachel runs back in) Who died? Who died? Roll him over! Oh, c'mon, roll him over! Oh...! Well, we know it wasn't Dexter, right Marcel? Because- (Looks down and notices he is missing) Marcel? Marc- (Notices the open door)
Rachel: I don't know. We were watching TV, and then he pooped in Monica's shoe-
Rachel: I don't know. The left one.
Rachel: Oh. Oh, those little clunky Amish things you think go with everything.
Chandler: Rachel lost Marcel.
Rachel: C'mon, you guys, what're we gonna do, what're we gonna do?
Rachel: Oh, my, God, c'mon, you guys! He's gonna be home any minute! He's gonna kill me!
Rachel: Well, what'm I gonna do? What'm I gonna do?
Rachel: Anybody wanna trade? Oh...
Rachel: (On the phone) Okay, he's a, he's a black capuchian monkey with a white face... (Enter Ross) ...with, with Russian dressing and, and pickles on the side. Okay. Thanks.
Rachel: Great! It went great. Really great. Hey, is that wine?
Rachel: Oh, I would love some. But y'know what? Y'know what? Let's not drink it here. I'm feeling kinda crazy. You wanna go to Newark?
Rachel: Oh God, Ross, I cannot do this.
Rachel: Oh God... Okay. Alright. Alright. Okay. Ross, please don't hate me.
Rachel: Y'know Marcel?
Rachel: Well, I kind of... I kind of lost him.
Rachel: I know, I know, I'm sorry-
Rachel: (Tearfully) Ross, I'm doing everything that I can, I've got everybody looking for him, and I- (Door buzzer goes and she runs to get it) Oh! Who is it?
Rachel: See? I've even called Animal Control!
Rachel: Uh-huh... why... do you not like them?
Rachel: O-okay, now see, you never ever ever told us that...
(A knock on the door. Rachel swiftly opens it)
Rachel: Hi, thanks for coming.
Rachel: Oh, y'know what? That was a complete misunderstanding! (Ross puts his arms around her and they act all sweetness and light)
Rachel: Turned out it was a hat.
Rachel: Cat! What'm I saying? Cat!
Luisa: Oh my God, you are! And you're Rachel Green!
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Luisa? Oh my God! Monica! It's Luisa!
Rachel: Yes!!
Rachel: None.
Luisa: Ah, it's not so much you, you were fat, you had your own problems. (To Rachel) But you? What a bitch!
Rachel: What?!
[Cut to Marcel walking along a hallway. He notices a banana on the floor and picks it up. The hand of an unseen person grabs him and carries him away. Then cut to Ross and Rachel on the street outside.]
Rachel: Marcel?
Rachel: Ross, you don't know that.
Rachel: Ross, I said I'm sorry like a million times. What do you want me to do? You want me to break my foot too? Okay, I'm gonna break my foot, right here. (Kicks the sign) Ow!! Oh! Oh my God, oh my God! There, are you happy now?!
Rachel: Y'know, it is not like I did this on purpose.
Ross: Oh, no no no. Nono, this is just vintage Rachel. I mean, things just sort of happen around you. I mean, you're off in Rachel-land, doing your Rachel-thing, totally oblivious to people's monkeys, or to people's feelings...
Rachel: Ross.
Rachel: Ross.
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: Then what's with all the bananas?
Rachel: Oh, c'mon, Luisa!
Ross: (To Rachel) You had to be a bitch in high school, you couldn't've been fat.
Rachel: Alright. In high school I was the prom queen and I was the homecoming queen and the class president and you... were also there! But if you take this monkey, I will lose one of the most important people in my life. You can hate me if you want, but please do not punish him. C'mon, Luisa, you have a chance to be the bigger person here! Take it!
Rachel: Alright. Well then how about I call your supervisor, and I tell her that you shot my friend in the ass with a dart?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Rachel and Ross are there. Ross is trying to get the dress off Marcel.]
Rachel: Y'know, with the right pair of pumps, that would be a great little outfit.
Rachel: Oh, Ross, c'mon. It's my fault, I almost lost your...
Rachel: That'd be good.
Ross: Alright. (He goes to get the glasses. Then he hesitates and turns off the main light. Rachel looks round and he acts surprised) The, uh, the neighbours must be vacuuming. (He sits down and starts to pour the wine) Well, so long as we're here and, uh, not on the subject, I was thinking about, uh, how mad we got at each other before, and, um, I was thinking maybe it was partially because of how we, um...
Barry: Rachel.
Rachel: Barry?!
Ross and Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: Hi! Emma will be up in a minute!
Phoebe: .and I said Vicrum you can't just call every time you get lonely you know, you, you gave up that right when you slept with Rachel.
Rachel: Ok, look, Ross. I do not want Emma going to the playground.
Rachel: Ross, those things go like 40 miles an hour! Ok? When you're... and there is that moment when you are at the top, when you just don't know if you're gonna return back to earth!
Rachel: All right!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, another time lapse, Monica is seeking advice from Rachel and Phoebe about possible replacement earrings.]
Rachel: That was one time, Ross, and they were only like 5 milligrams.
Rachel: Well, I did my best to convince him that Im not some crazy girl who is dying to get marriedIm just going through a hard time.
RACHEL: What, so you go over there, you tell him you think he's cute, what's the worst that could happen?
Rachel: Ok.
Rachel: Ok.
Rachel: Ok, careful.
Rachel: Careful, watch her hair. WATCH HER HAIR!
Rachel: You gave her a key to your apartment?!
(Rachel stands up and kisses Ross. He is stunned. A moment of silence follows.)
Janice: (entering and singing) Monica and Rachel had syrup, now I can get my man to cheer up. (laughs hysterically) Good morning Joey.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is there except for Rachel and Ross, who both come storming in. Rachel is still going off about Rosss secret marriage.]
Rachel: Oh, oh Ross, oh my God, are you okay?
Rachel: Well when I talk to her I almost feel like she understands what I'm saying.
Ross and Rachel: Hmmmm .
Rachel: (breaking up) Were just really very excited about this charity event that we have to go to.
Rachel: Alright fine. I'll do it.
Rachel: IF you hold a spider.
Rachel: and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?
Rachel: And umm, vintage handkerchiefs yknow cause, people cry at weddings. (Starting to cry.) Im just gonna grab a couple of these.
Rachel: (after a pause) Phoebe, Shania Twain is still alive!
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: ROSS!
Rachel: whoo... ok... wow... ok... OH!
Rachel: (more confident) Ok...
Rachel: That's because he's on your neck.
Rachel: I can't believe this! This is Emma's first Thanksgiving!
Rachel: It's not? (whispering to Ross) When was she born?
Rachel: Can't wait!
Rachel: Yeah.
Phoebe: (singing) Happy Chanukah, Monica! May your Christmas be snowy, Joey! Happy New Year, Chandler and Ross. Spin the draddle, Rachel!
Rachel: Oh, big glamour night. Me and Monica at Laundorama.
Rachel: So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon?! Or should I say Mrs. Monica Becker?
Rachel: And a thousand dollars.
Rachel: No! Put that box down! We are not going anywhere! This is my apartment and I like it! This is a girls apartment! That is a boys apartment, its dirty and it smells. This is pretty. Its-its so pretty! And look, and its-its purple! And Im telling you, you with the steady hand, I am not moving, and now I have got the steady hand. (She holds out her hand, which is shaking uncontrollably.)
Rachel: Okay, that's gonna take them a minute. Do you have anything else you wanna get off your chest?
Rachel: Phoebe, I think... It's just too weird, I just saw a one year old running around with pantyhose on!
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: No, what?
Rachel: You heard them say that?
Rachel: So shake it! (Rachel slaps Ross's butt on the beat)
Rachel: Phoebe, you have to calm down.
Rachel: Because I already did!
Rachel: No...
Rachel: Oh, why do you even bother? I already ruined her first birthday... And do you know how important these early experiences are Ross? Very! According to the back cover of that book that you gave me.
Rachel: What are you doing here!
RACHEL: My parents happened. All they had to do was sit in the same stadium, smile proudly, and not talk about the divorce. But nooo, they got into a huge fight in the middle of the commencement address. Bishop Tutu actually had to stop and shush them. But you know what, you know what the good news is? I get to serve coffee for the next 8 hours.
Ross: We're late too! (Rachel screams)
(Rachel, Phoebe and Emma arrive)
Rachel: And I won!
Rachel: Yeah. That's me!
Rachel: She won a thousand dollars!
Ross: (to Rachel) Uh, how long until they announce the numbers, Mommy?
Rachel: Ill be watching TV if anybody needs me. (exits to her room)
(Rachel comes out of her apartment}
Rachel: Yes, I'm sorry. Do you have any extra pants? Umm, my friend seems to have had a little accident.
Rachel: Oh, God. This is bad. This is so bad.
Ross: (Reading the note) We know you're out there. (Rachel gasps)
Rachel: Ross, there is no pressure on you. Okay? I mean you can as involved as you want. (Ross nods.)
Rachel: Yeah, we got a lot to do! We gotta think about the flowers, the caterers, the music
Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: Yknow, you-you also couldve used uh, lamps and then followed the light.
Ross: (Staring back, and then breaks off) (To Phoebe and Rachel) Yeah, he can do it!
Phoebe and Rachel: So, so sorry.
Rachel: So bad.
Rachel: Dessert?
Rachel: Okay, bla-bla-bla-bla!! Who is it?!
Rachel: No. Joey, she knows! We were at Ugly Naked Guy's apartment and we saw them doing it through the window. (Joey gasps) Actually, we saw them doing it up against the window.
Rachel: Well, it would be easier to move just right across the hall. Wait a minute, unless youre thinking about Naked Wednesdays.
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Ewww, is that what that is?
Rachel: (staring at him) Whno, but yknow who did stop in here looking for ya, Tennille.
Rachel: Joey, Im really sorry that I lied to you. I was just trying to make things
Monica: I do, but Rachel borrowed them.
Rachel: Whats-whats going on? Phils really pissed!
[Scene: Central Perk. Charlie, Joey and Rachel are on the couches]
(Rachel enters, checking the mail, then looks up and sees Gladys placed on the barcalounger.)
Rachel: To Monica and Chandler... and that knocked up girl in Ohio.
Rachel: I'm so happy for you!
Rachel: No! Ross, no! It is not fine! Eh-eh-according to my plan I should already be with the guy I wanna marry!
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: You know what? I don't want to be with them either, but it's Thanksgiving and we should not want to be together, together. (Goes to unlock the door)
(The front entrance. Joey and the bridesmaid are up against the wall kissing. Rachel comes in the door and walks by Joey unnoticed. She walks into the chapel and sees Ross and Emily kissing. She looks as though she wants to cry. Emily walks away and Ross turns and sees Rachel standing there.)
Rachel: Yeah, he did! (smiling) Oh, see, this is what I'm talking about!
Rachel: Do you think I'm someone else?
Rachel: (to Joey) Hey, who's Phoebe with?
Rachel: Well, it's a little low... pick up a little... (Ross picks it up) a little bit more... (he picks it up again) a little bit more... (he takes it off) There you go! (pause) Now throw it away!
Rachel: Ha ha ha, third time this week. Man, this does not get old.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: (To Ross) Great, shoot, what are we gonna do?
Rachel: Ohh! Oh God! (Laughs her way into the living room.)
Rachel: what?
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Oh
Rachel: Hi