words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Joey, and Monica are sitting on the couch as Ross is up getting some coffee.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is kneeling at the coffee table and has a bunch of pictures laid out in front of her as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Ohh, thank God! Finally!
Rachel: Ohh, it's me and La Poo! Wow! I miss that dog.
Rachel: Great! Thanks!
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Oops. Sorry! Well, good thing you number all of them, huh?
Rachel: Ohhhh. Honey, honey, honey, it's okay, it's okay honey. I'm gonna fix you a drink, huh? Maybe a margarita?
Rachel: No honey, it's okay! Listen, I'll got to Ross's and get the blender, you get all the margarita stuff ready.
Rachel: Okay, you want me to stop at the ATM?
Rachel: What?!
(Rachel slowly leaves the apartment.)
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Rachel is just entering. She takes off her coat and heads for the kitchen. As she does, she knocks something off of a bookcase next to the kitchen door with her coat and it breaks.]
Rachel: Ohh please don't be from a real dinosaur! Please! Please! Please! Please! Please! Please! Please! Please! (She picks up the 2 pieces and looks at the stand.) Made in Mexico! Yes!! Ugh, who would buy this?! (Looks for a place to hide it and finds a wall sconce and drops the pieces into it and heads into the kitchen as the phone rings.)
(Rachel runs over and answers the phone with the blender in hand.)
Rachel: Hey! What's up?!
Rachel: So all we have is ice?
Rachel: Okay.
Emily: (on answering machine) Hello Ross? It's Emily. (Rachel runs back into the room with the tequila.) I know this is out of the blue but uh, I'm getting married tomorrow. Well, maybe I am. I keep thinking about you and I'm wondering if-if we made a mistake giving up so fast. Are you thinking about me? Of course you're not, but if you are, call me tonight. Okay, bye.
Rachel: Oh. Oh! (Takes a slug of tequila.)
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Rachel is playing Emily's message to Monica.]
Rachel: (does Monica's) I know!
Rachel: What?! We can't do that!
Rachel: Noo! Oh no! No! God no! He should not get back together with her. I know that! You know that! Even Ross knows that! But that still doesnt give us the right to erase his message!
Rachel: I don't think he's the one who needs help.
Monica: No, look, she's obviously unstable, okay? I mean she's thinking about running out on her wedding day. (Rachel slowly turns and glares at her.) (Realizing what she just said.) Okay, fine! But I mean, look at the position she's putting him in! What's he gonna do? Ross is gonna run over there on the wedding day and break up the marriage?! I mean, who would do that?! (Rachel again turns and glares at her in disgust.) Okay, fine, all right, but that's y'know, it's different! Although it did involve a lot of the same people.
Rachel: Ugh!
Rachel: Okay, you are crazy! I'm sorry, but she sounded generally upset! I mean, listen! (She hits a button on the machine.)
Rachel: Noooooooo!
Rachel: No, wait. Wait.
Rachel: No, Monica! Monica! We have to fix this!
Rachel: Yeah well unless we tell him.
Rachel: Oh, maybe that's Emily calling back to leave the exact same message.
Rachel: Right?
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Rachel is trying to repair the thing she broke earlier, but gets interrupted by hearing Ross at the door. She panics and throws the thing into the kitchen. And runs to the couch as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Hey! Hi!
Rachel: Hey! Y'know what? You are in our apartment all the time! Okay? This is, this is just a drop in the bucket mister!
Rachel: Okay, just a little scared. What's going on Ross?
Rachel: What?! What? What happened?!
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: (gasps) Really?!
Ross: No, a car backfired, but (Rachel suddenly calms down) I thought somebody was taking a shot at me. And Rach, I I survived! And I was filled with this-this great respect for life. Y'know? I-I want to experience every moment. I want to seize every opportunity. I-I am seeing everything so-so clearly now.
Rachel: Because a car backfired?
Rachel: Well, I-I-I don't know how this fits into your whole "seizing" thing but um, Emily called you today.
Rachel: No, she left a message. (He starts for the machine.) (Stopping him.) But it-it kinda got erased. There's just (Pause) something wrong with your machine.
Rachel: Well, uh something about having second thoughts about the wedding and did you guys make a mistake breaking up and uh, she wants you to call her.
Rachel: Now, that-that was a good thing that I told you, right?
Rachel: Okay. Thank you! Thank you! BecauseI'm sorry, all right. Because y'know what? She didn't want menot important. The point is, I was right. Your decision. Okay? I was right. (She starts for the door.) (Stops) Your decision.
Rachel: Okay, no, that's not the right decision. That's not, that's not right, no Ross-Ross, come on! I mean, that woman made you miserable! Okay, Ross, do you really want to get back into that?
Rachel: Ugh, Ross! That was not a near death experience! That was barely an experience!
Rachel: Okay, y'know what? Maybe, this is not about seizing stuff. Maybe this is about escaping stuff.
Rachel: I mean, look-look today you escaped (Pause) (Not believing it) death, y'know? And maybe this is a chance for you to escape getting back together with Emily?
Rachel: Well, there you go!
Rachel: (laughing) Close call day.
Rachel: Ohh, honey no problem. Okay. (Gets up.)
Rachel: Oh?
Rachel: No. (She heads for the door again.)
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: (going out the door) Yeah, uh you-you probably need that for stamps, right?
Rachel: What-wh-what so well just stay married forever?!
Rachel: (to Monica) I mean is that woman capable of talking about anything else but sex?
[Rachel, in her bridesmaid dress, complete with hat, which makes her look like Little Bo Peep, and Ross enter]
Rachel: Seriously Pheebs, it's not gonna be that kind of a party.
Russell: And well need you and Rachel to testify before a judge.
Rachel: Because it is too damn hard Ross. I can't even begin to explain to you how much I'm gonna miss you. When I think about not seeing you every day, it makes me not want to go... Okay, so if you think that I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. It's because you mean more to me. So there, all right, there's your goodbye... Oh!
RACHEL: OK, here we go. Honey, I'm sorry, they were all out of apple pie, someone just got the last piece.
Rachel: Ross, it just wouldnt have been feasible.
Ross: Yeah, I'm a friend of Rachel Green's. Uhm, actually we met at the Christmas party about two years ago.
Rachel: Alright. Well then how about I call your supervisor, and I tell her that you shot my friend in the ass with a dart?
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are about to go inside.]
Rachel: No! Im not! I-I-I just think its wrong! Its-its that ImHere I am about to pop and hes out picking up some shop girl at Sluts R Us!
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
Rachel: Yeah. Thought I'd give it a shot. I'm still on the first chapter. Now, do you think his 'love stick can be liberated from its denim prison'?
Rachel: Och, god. (seeing Emma) Oh, thank god, you�re okay. I�m so sorry we left you. Mom never gonna leave you again. Never ever ever again. Uch.
Rachel: You know the book says that whenever shes sleeping I should be sleeping so (She gives Monica thumbs and goes to lay down)
Rachel: Pheebs, I dont know what to say. I guess the flea market was just better last time.
Rachel: Okay. Its okay. Were gonna be okay. Yknow what? Its okay. Im gonna, Im gonna, Im gonna boil some water and just rip up some sheets!
Rachel: So wh..? He's smart, he's qualified. Give me one good reason we shouldn't try him out.
Ross: This is crazy. I mean, six years? And because of me you guys aren't gonna be together? Can I ask you something? Really, what is this thing with you and Rachel?
Rachel: Oh we justwe drove each other crazy!
Rachel: Oh okay, Ill fix that to. Whats her e-mail address?
Ross: Everyone? I would like to make a toast to Rachel and Joey.
Rachel: Okay, come onJoey, Ill buy you a new one! All right? Well go down to the store right now and well-well get you a new chair.
(Phoebe and Rachel both pause, look at each other, and go press their breasts against him. Which Joey doesnt mind, of course.)
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, its actually Joey and Rachels. Phoebe is trying to convince Rachel to switch with her and live with Monica as Joey looks on.]
Ross: You should've seen the look on her face. I don't want Rachel to hate me! I don't know what to do.
Rachel: Okay please tell me that this is just one of your jokes that you do that I dont get.
Rachel: (sarcastic) No, no, that's ok. You won fair and square. I'm so sad!
Rachel: Ross, I swear, I dont know.
Phoebe: Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!! Hey!!! (they all stop fighting, Chandler continues to dance.) Look what youre doing to Chandler!! (Chandler finally stops) (to Ross and Rachel) Yeah, look, we know this is really, really hard for you guys. Okay? (Ross starts to leave) You dont, all right you dont have to love each other, okay? You dont, you dont even have to like each other much right now. But please, you have to figure out a way to be around each other.
Rachel: Oh, I know, I know, its-its so, its so totally like, "Whoa! Can we do this?" Yknow, I mean, but I mean it just feels right! Dont you think? It does! I mean, it just feels right, dont you think?
Rachel: Oh God I just can not imagine what is gonna happen if Chandler doesnt show up!
Rachel: Oh hell, hes done this three times! He knows what its about!
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are sitting at their table.]
Rachel: Hey! Joey, would you mind giving me and Ross a hand moving his couch?
Rachel: Well, wait a minute! The puss is good! It means it's healing! (Runs after him.)
Monica: Nice work everybody! So much for the yknow, "You can drive it, but dont tell Rachel" plan!
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, Chandler slowly closes the door, and we hear Rachel from the living room.]
Rachel: I mean its the end of an era!
Rachel: You are so just doing this out of spite.
Ross: Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. (He gets up leaving Phoebe in shock.)
Rachel: Okay, well, that's one less thing we have to do on Monday.
(Rachel enters the room and checks the answering machine)
Rachel: I mean, you know... Ross and I haven't dated in like... six years...
Rachel: (on phone) I've got magic beans. (Listens) Never-never mind.
Rachel: I dont know, I dont know, werent you the guy that told me to quit my job when I had absolutely nothing else to do. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!!
Rachel: No honey, okay, okay, you wanna know why Ross canceled the date? Because I asked him to.
Rachel: Does anybody need more coffee?
Chandler: Hey, by any chance did either of pick uh Rachel for your secret Santa, cause I wanna trade for her.
Monica: Yes there is! He's black and white and shaggy and [Cut to Monicas apartment] he's sitting next to Rachel and licking Rachel's hand.
Rachel: In Human Resources!!!!!!
Rachel: Oh wait! Yknow what? I cant, I cant look at it. I cant. Somebody else tell me, somebody tell me.
[Another series of flashbacks begins with Episode 413: The One With Rachels Crush, Joey is telling Rachel and Phoebe how he picks up women.]
(An 80's Rachel and fat Monica walk into the party room. Both with funny hair-do's and clothes)
Rachel: (gasps) Oh! Oh my God! I thought she was on Atkins.
Amy: Oh! It's Ross... Hey Ross! (She says hey to the guy at the falafel stand, whose only similarity with Ross would be his black hair.) Hello-oo Ross! (to Rachel) He's rude!
Rachel: So, like, you guys all have jobs?
(Rachel and Joey hug, and Rachel turns to enter the apartment through the side window again. At that moment Joey tries to climb over the edge of the balcony.)
[Scene: The Anniversary Party, Ross and Rachel have just gotten another wedding present.]
Joey: Yes, now is when you swoop! You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks out of there, the first guy Rachel sees is you, She's gotta know that you're everything he's not! You're like, like the anti-Paolo!
Rachel: Well, believe it or not, it's true. When Joey and I were together, he was wonderful. He was thoughtful and mature. And for the one week that we went out, he didn't sleep with anybody else!
Rachel: Yes, I did. Thank you very much, it was excellent. (Disembarks)
Rachel: (Sighing) Well I-I think your wrong.
Rachel: Yeah-yeah, did-didnt you use to have a pair? They were really round, burgundy, and they made you look kind of umm
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Rachel: Chandler!! (He turns around quickly) Promise me, you will end it.
All (except Rachel): Congratulations! (Rachel looks devastated)
RACHEL: Uh, I don't know. Why don't you put it right here next to my water?
[cut to Ross who walks up to Rachel who is eating a baked pretzel.]
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
Rachel: Oh Joey, I cant believe you brought my boss into this! Im gonna get fired!
Rachel: Thank you. (He goes to leave.) Hey-hey umm, uh, is there, is there any such thing as an annulment shower?
Rachel: Yeah, just give me a minute! (Thinking) Oh well, yes, I can think of one good thing.
(Rachel sticks a marshmallow into Monica’s nose. Monica takes it out of her nose by closing one nostril, and blowing.)
Rachel: Ross, look, I know that some of this stuff is out there, but I mean, come on, look at this, look at this sweater! (she picks up a blue sweater). I mean, this is just beautiful!
Rachel: Were not gonna do this, all right? Shes just gonna think that were doin it.
Rachel: Yeah, Rachel. And this (points to Monica) is Ross' sister, Monica. We met at Thanksgiving. (looks around the room as if searching for something more interesting to do).
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are there, discussing the night before.]
Rachel: No, everythings fine. I just gotta go back
Rachel: Okay. All right. (Gets up.) Honey listen. When I tell you what Im about to tell you, I need you to remember that we are all here for you and that we love you.
Rachel: Its not dumb. But, maybe its okay that youre not a part of it. Y'know what I mean? (Ross looks confused) I mean its like, I-I-I like that youre not involved in that part of my life.
Ross: Look, Rachel, this is poker. I play to win, alright? In order for me to win, other people have to lose. So if you're gonna play poker with me, don't expect me to be a 'nice guy,' OK? Cause once those cards are dealt... (claps hands three times)
Rachel: Oh, I can't. Because I-I've seen them.
Rachel: I am! I am a woman who spent a lot of money on a dress and she wants to wear it, because soon she wont be able to fit into it.
RACH: Yeah, we're gonna... we're gonna get some cake. [Phoebe and Rachel go to counter.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, and Chandler are there as Ross enters and sees Gunther.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is eating dinner, Monica and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
Rachel: Oh, thank you for doing that. I just cant deal with this just quite yet.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is getting ready for her date and Joey is reading a magazine.]
[The door opens and Chandler comes in. Rachel covers the door with a blanket]
Rachel: Oooohh that’s interesting.
Ross: No! Come on letsOne more time! One final push! Ready? 1 2 3! (Rachel pushes so hard her head snaps up head-butting Ross and knocking him down.)
Rachel: Joey, youre such an amazing actor! (He smiles.) How do you know where Dr. Drake Remoray leaves off and Joey Tribbiani begins?
Monica: And Rachel. (Chandler clears his voice loudly) And thats Chandler.
Rachel: Im Monicas maid of honor. Okay? Dont try to blue pin me!
Rachel: Yeah? Okay! Good, good, because he's coming. He's coming. (To Chandler) Hey, what's up? (She leaves and closes the door behind her.)
Rachel: I know, that old lady at the end was ready to take you home.
(Monica closes the door and slowly walks into Rachels old and now empty room.)
Rachel: So what are you saying; I should run him under hot water and bang his head against a table?