words in movies
Rachel: Yeah but yknow what they say Mon, "Theres no such thing as bad press."
Rachel: I didnt write it.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, its late at night, Rachel is sitting on the couch in the dark wide-awake as Ross walks to the bathroom.]
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: I am freaking out!
Rachel: My due date is in one week!
Rachel: That is seven days!
Rachel: (interrupting him) No-no-no-no-no Ross! Please, come on we do not have any of the big stuff we need! We do not a changing table! We do not have a crib! We do not have a diaper service!
Rachel: Im serious.
Rachel: Okay. Thank you. Thats great. Thank you. Wait-wait! Where on west 10th? Because theres this really cute shoe store that has like this little
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh, wait Ross! Im sorry, one more thing!
Rachel: Umm, our situation. Yknow umm, what we mean to each other. And I mean we-were having this baby together, and we live together. Isnt that, isnt that weird?
Rachel: Im just kidding! You can go pee! (He does so in a hurry.)
[Scene: The Baby Furniture Store, Ross and Rachel are checking out.]
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: No-no-no! No, no, no, were not married.
Ross: We are having a baby together, but were not involved. (The cashier, a very beautiful woman, looks confused) I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a while ago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night. (Rachel looks at him angrily) Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Actually, thats one of the reasons why were not a couple.
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Rachel: Oh my God! Im standing at a cash register, holding a credit card, and Im bored.
Cashier: I can tell you work out. (Ross is please and Rachel looks at him confused.) A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. (Rachel has a disbelieving look on her face.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Hi Pheebs!
Rachel: Oh, it was great! We got everything that we needed! Oh and Ross, almost got something that wasnt on the list. A whore.
Rachel: Well, we were paying for our stuff and this saleswoman just started flirting with him.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
Rachel: No! Im not! I-I-I just think its wrong! Its-its that ImHere I am about to pop and hes out picking up some shop girl at Sluts R Us!
Phoebe: Is that a real place? (Rachels stunned) Are they hiring?
Chandler: (entering) Hey Phoebe! (To Rachel) Fatty!
Rachel: Oh yeah! You reallyYou look great.
Chandler: (To Rachel) Did you like me when we first met?
Rachel: Chandler, Im not gonna lie to ya, but I am gonna run away from you. (Gets up and hurries out.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are unpacking and setting up their new purchases.]
Rachel: All this stuff takes up a lot of room. Hey how uh, how serious are you about keeping Ben in your life?
Ross: Oh. (Reaches into his pocket for some money as Rachel enters the living room and watches holding two stuffed dinosaurs.)
Rachel: Horny bitch. (They both look at her, pretending that the dinosaurs shes holding are arguing.) No! Youre a horny bitch! Noooo! Youre the horny bitch! No! Youre a horny bitch!
Rachel: So you guys go, have a really good time.
Ross: (To Katie) Yeah, Im just gonna grab my coat. And uh, and my whip. (Katie looks worried.) Yknow because of the Indiana Jones? (Katie laughs) Not-not because Im-Im into S&M. (Katies worried again.) Im not-Im not into anything weird. Yknow? Just-just normal sex. (Katie is uncomfortable.) So, Im gonna grab my coat. (Does so, leaving Katie and Rachel alone.)
Rachel: So, you had a good day huh? Big commission; picked up a daddy.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Yeah please, you guys have fun.
Rachel: Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although you missed a button.
Rachel: Oh okay, I see what youre doing there.
Rachel: Hi! Youre back from your date!
Rachel: Im fine, but thats not important. Whats important is how was she?
Rachel: Oh uh-huh, uh-huh, coffee, a little rub-rub-rub under the table.
Rachel: No! No, shesShe was nice. I mean, shes a little slutty, but who isnt?
Rachel: Of course you did Ross, you would date a gorilla if it called you Indiana Jones!
Rachel: No! Its just that, Kate bothered me.
Rachel: There was nothing wrong with her! All right? She was perfectly lovely!
Rachel: I dont want you to date her!
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Really? But Im being so unreasonable.
Rachel: (starting to cry) Oh Ross, thank you. Thank you. (They hug.)
Rachel: No, not really. Youre pressing the baby into my bladder and now I have to pee. Sorry. (She gets up and starts for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Yeah. (Stops and starts doing the I-have-to-go-to-the-bathroom dance.)
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: (pause) Wow! I dont know, maybe. Im
Rachel: (laughs) I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no, no!
Rachel: No thats just(Laughs)Thats just cause Im such a good messer!
(They both laugh. Ross sits down, but Rachel doesnt move and is lost in thought.)
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Right! (Heads for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Well, it was a little extravagant, but I a pretty good deal.
[Scene: Central Perk, I'm sure you've guessed, it's the famous fight scene between Ross and Rachel.]
Rachel: Ohh
Rachel: So, does this (The dress) come in another color or (The store owner walks away.)
Rachel: (entering) Hey!
Rachel: Oh my God, Im so sorry.
Rachel: I think so.
Rachel: (to Monica and Phoebe) Have I been living with him for too long, or did that all just make sense?
Rachel: See? Now, he could date her.
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, are you still on hold? I was supposed to call my Dad back like two hours ago.
Rachel: You know, when two people have a connection, you know, that's... just seems like such a... waste.
Rachel: Oh, hi!
Rachel: Oh! Thank you!
Mr. Thompson: Nice to see you Rachel.
Rachel: Yeah.
(Rachels boss, Mr. Thompson walks up.)
Rachel: (on the phone) Mum, please!I know you love your new lips, but I can barely understand you! Would you, please, just let me say goodnight to my daughter?
Rachel: No Mon that's not the point. I'm out a thousand dollars, I'm all scratched up, and I'm stuck with this stupid cat that looks like a hand! (Storms out.)
Rachel: Oh my God. (starting to cry)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey is there. Rachel is looking out of the window and Ross is handing out some Chinese takeout. There's a small SAP in the corner of the screen.]
Rachel: (hanging up the phone) I got the job!
Phoebe: It's a tarantula! (Joey almost falls down from his drum-stool jumping up) Oh! God! Rachel, look, I'm sorry. What was I thinking giving Joey this big, gross, scary spider in such a poorly constructed cage?
Rachel: Ugh! So close!
[Scene, The Park: Phoebe and Rachel are getting ready to go running]
Rachel: I wanna say a disease.
Rachel: What?! What?! What?!
Rachel: Op, ice. I need ice.
Rachel: What are you doing?
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Emma is still crying.]
Rachel: Oh, okay. Will you take my place?
Rachel: (suddenly worried) Uh, wh-why?
[Scene: Central Perk, time lapse, Rachel is at the counter as Jill enters.]
[Cut back to the present, Rachel has made her decision.]
Rachel: Yeah! But I dont know what he looks like!
Rachel: What were you thinking?!
Rachel: Wh?!
Rachel: Ugh!
Rachel: How is you drinking helping the kids?
Rachel: Not great.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Wow that's uh, juicy. Umm, (checks watch) y'know what though Mon, I actually do have a lot of work to do so if-ifare you sure there's just not anything else?
(Ross and Joey urge Chandler to tell Rachel.)
Ross: Okay, okay. Uh, well uh, Rachel is going to need to yell sweet nothings (Paul enters) in his ear.
Rachel: Oh great!
Joey: Ahh, yes. (Pushes Rachel in front of himself so that she could do the talking.)
Rachel: Ohh
Rachel: (To Joey) Okay. Okay. (Shushes him.)
Rachel: (To Joey) What?! What?!
Rachel: But Joey you dont have $20,000!
Rachel: Well first, for forgetting to throw you a bridal shower.
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel and Phoebe are sitting at the table as Joey approaches.]
Rachel: Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go running before it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!
CHAN: [through gritted teeth] Alright. [clears his throat] "It was summer, and it was hot. Rachel was there. A lonely gray couch. 'Oh, look,' cried Ned, and then the kingdom was his forever. The end."
Rachel: (still trapped under Ross) Pheebs, could you maybe hand me a cracker?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is sitting on couch and Rachel is getting some coffee. Phoebe keeps turning her head from to keep from looking at Rachel.]
Rachel: Yeah me too.
Rachel: Were gonna find love!
Rachel: Who?
Rachel: Joey?!
Rachel: You do?
Rachel: Exactly!
Rachel: Are you serious?!
Rachel: Yeah.
[Time Lapse, Rachel is breating into a paper bag.]
Rachel: Oh, seriously?
Rachel: Charming.
Rachel: Hey you!
Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe: Hey, Mon.
Rachel: What? Who?
Rachel: Exactly.
Rachel: (starts crying and speaking at the same time, making it almost impossible to understand what she's saying) I wouldn't know what I'm gonna do without you...
Monica: Hmm? (Rachel holds up the candlesticks.)
Rachel: Ive never lived like this before.
Mr. Geller: (entering) Hi Rachel.
Rachel: Well yknow, some people make deals with a friend, like if neither of them are married by the time theyre 40, they marry each other.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: Oh God, Phoebe!
Ross: Ooh, I wanna switch to Rachel too!
(Rachel gets all happy.)
Rachel: (She bends over to try and pick up the aspirin) Oww!
Rachel: Pick one.
Rachel: Youre welcome.
Rachel: (reading) Joey! (Pause) We should just switch.
Rachel: No, its Ross. Its Ross. You like Ross. (He just shakes his head.) Oh daddy, I hope youre okay with all of this. I mean think about it, this is a good thing. Youre gonnaThis is your first grandchild! Youre gonna be a poppy!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) So this is Brooklyn.
Rachel: So Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Sweety, I gotta tell ya... it sounds a little bit like you like the apartment more than you like...
Rachel: Is there room on that step for a pathetic loser?
Rachel: Ohhh, this is the least jealous Ive ever been!
Rachel: You know we were all alone and he was being really nice to me and, oh and he gave me this scarf...
(Rachel just stands there staring at Joey and Charlie in silence. After a while, Ross turns around and sees them.)
Rachel: Oh no, no-no-no, that's not, not, not, what he is doing. He's just, he's just really romantic.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: (To Monica) Yeah, youre on your own.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Im talking about massages.
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Well thank you, you too.
Rachel: Hi!