words in movies
Rachel: Yeah but yknow what they say Mon, "Theres no such thing as bad press."
Rachel: I didnt write it.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, its late at night, Rachel is sitting on the couch in the dark wide-awake as Ross walks to the bathroom.]
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: I am freaking out!
Rachel: My due date is in one week!
Rachel: That is seven days!
Rachel: (interrupting him) No-no-no-no-no Ross! Please, come on we do not have any of the big stuff we need! We do not a changing table! We do not have a crib! We do not have a diaper service!
Rachel: Im serious.
Rachel: Okay. Thank you. Thats great. Thank you. Wait-wait! Where on west 10th? Because theres this really cute shoe store that has like this little
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh, wait Ross! Im sorry, one more thing!
Rachel: Umm, our situation. Yknow umm, what we mean to each other. And I mean we-were having this baby together, and we live together. Isnt that, isnt that weird?
Rachel: Im just kidding! You can go pee! (He does so in a hurry.)
[Scene: The Baby Furniture Store, Ross and Rachel are checking out.]
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: No-no-no! No, no, no, were not married.
Ross: We are having a baby together, but were not involved. (The cashier, a very beautiful woman, looks confused) I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a while ago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night. (Rachel looks at him angrily) Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Actually, thats one of the reasons why were not a couple.
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Rachel: Oh my God! Im standing at a cash register, holding a credit card, and Im bored.
Cashier: I can tell you work out. (Ross is please and Rachel looks at him confused.) A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. (Rachel has a disbelieving look on her face.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Hi Pheebs!
Rachel: Oh, it was great! We got everything that we needed! Oh and Ross, almost got something that wasnt on the list. A whore.
Rachel: Well, we were paying for our stuff and this saleswoman just started flirting with him.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
Rachel: No! Im not! I-I-I just think its wrong! Its-its that ImHere I am about to pop and hes out picking up some shop girl at Sluts R Us!
Phoebe: Is that a real place? (Rachels stunned) Are they hiring?
Chandler: (entering) Hey Phoebe! (To Rachel) Fatty!
Rachel: Oh yeah! You reallyYou look great.
Chandler: (To Rachel) Did you like me when we first met?
Rachel: Chandler, Im not gonna lie to ya, but I am gonna run away from you. (Gets up and hurries out.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are unpacking and setting up their new purchases.]
Rachel: All this stuff takes up a lot of room. Hey how uh, how serious are you about keeping Ben in your life?
Ross: Oh. (Reaches into his pocket for some money as Rachel enters the living room and watches holding two stuffed dinosaurs.)
Rachel: Horny bitch. (They both look at her, pretending that the dinosaurs shes holding are arguing.) No! Youre a horny bitch! Noooo! Youre the horny bitch! No! Youre a horny bitch!
Rachel: So you guys go, have a really good time.
Ross: (To Katie) Yeah, Im just gonna grab my coat. And uh, and my whip. (Katie looks worried.) Yknow because of the Indiana Jones? (Katie laughs) Not-not because Im-Im into S&M. (Katies worried again.) Im not-Im not into anything weird. Yknow? Just-just normal sex. (Katie is uncomfortable.) So, Im gonna grab my coat. (Does so, leaving Katie and Rachel alone.)
Rachel: So, you had a good day huh? Big commission; picked up a daddy.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Yeah please, you guys have fun.
Rachel: Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although you missed a button.
Rachel: Oh okay, I see what youre doing there.
Rachel: Hi! Youre back from your date!
Rachel: Im fine, but thats not important. Whats important is how was she?
Rachel: Oh uh-huh, uh-huh, coffee, a little rub-rub-rub under the table.
Rachel: No! No, shesShe was nice. I mean, shes a little slutty, but who isnt?
Rachel: Of course you did Ross, you would date a gorilla if it called you Indiana Jones!
Rachel: No! Its just that, Kate bothered me.
Rachel: There was nothing wrong with her! All right? She was perfectly lovely!
Rachel: I dont want you to date her!
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Really? But Im being so unreasonable.
Rachel: (starting to cry) Oh Ross, thank you. Thank you. (They hug.)
Rachel: No, not really. Youre pressing the baby into my bladder and now I have to pee. Sorry. (She gets up and starts for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Yeah. (Stops and starts doing the I-have-to-go-to-the-bathroom dance.)
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: (pause) Wow! I dont know, maybe. Im
Rachel: (laughs) I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no, no!
Rachel: No thats just(Laughs)Thats just cause Im such a good messer!
(They both laugh. Ross sits down, but Rachel doesnt move and is lost in thought.)
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Right! (Heads for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Were having a girl?
Rachel: Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon, so nothing!
Chandler: You like Rachel?!
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
Rachel: No, I was waiting for you!
Rachel: Were having a girl.
Rachel: (entering) Hi, sweetie.
Rachel: Oh my God! (Rachel, Leslie, Kiki, and Joanne all scream and hug each other.
Rachel: I cant. Im busy. Im apartment hunting.
RACHEL: I'm sorry, what did you just say? Did you just say hi? Oh my God, Ross, Ross, Ben just said 'Hi'.
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: (looking down) Oh-oh!! One hand on the sheet Joe!
Rachel: I cannot believe you.
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up as her boss, Mr. Waltham, walks in.) Oh! Mr. Waltham, I ah really need to talk to you.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Wow! I cant believe you lied to me.
Ross: (happily) My best friend and my sister! I cannot believe this. (He hugs them both.) (To Joey and Rachel) You guys probably wanna get some hugs in too, huh? Big news!
Rachel: Phoebe, you were right. I should've never gone to London, and from now on you make all of my decisions for me.
RACHEL: Oh honey, I'm so proud of you, Min.
Rachel: Who is it?
Ross and Rachel while looking at each other surprised and shocked: Jill?
Woman at door: Hello? Rachel?
Rachel: Really?
(Rachel runs over and answers the phone with the blender in hand.)
Rachel: Yeah, everythings fine!
Rachel: Oh, I gotta go back in there.
Rachel: Okay, no uterus, no opinion.
Ross: Really?! (To Rachel) Hey, yknow what? Since you have such a great sense of what I need, uh ooh, heres-heres 60 bucks, why dont you take Phoebe down to that Colonial flea market of yours and get me some stuff.
Rachel: All right, now dont judge me. I normally wait until my date leaves, but you live here. Im ripping into this swan.
Rachel: Hide my rings.
Rachel: You are not. You have never been able to break up with her.
Rachel: Oh. <opens door preparing herself and then happily says> Amy! Happy Thanksgiving.
Rachel: Hey Ross! Check it out! I learned a new trick!
Joey: (To Rachel) Its like me when I was born.
Rachel: Oh Ross!! (Runs to the bathroom and closes the door.)
Rachel: Whats up?
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: (Gasps) Are you breaking up with us?
Rachel: Are you asking me to move out? Do you not want me here?
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: But Ross, its you and me!
Rachel: Um... hi.
Rachel: Okay, you gotta give me some of your piece.
Amy: oh... hi.. <goes to Rachel with open arms>
Rachel: Aw.
Rachel: I haven't seen you in like.. a year.
(Rachel exits with coffee)
Rachel: (Emma starts crying in the other room) Oh sorry, hold on. Let me just check on the baby!
Joey: (notices something in the mail that Rachel brought in) Oh my God!
Rachel: Oh well yeah me too. Um.. I had a baby.
Phoebe: All right. Oh! Shoot! Oh shoot! Uh, Rachel wanted to see this tape!
Rachel: (entering) Hi.
Rachel: I accidentally packed these with my stuff. (looks at the dog and gasps) Who is this?
Rachel: Uh.... its Emma.
Chandler: Yeah, I heard you and Rachel talking.
Rachel: Okay, let me just get a cup of coffee.
Phoebe: How could you not tell Mona that Rachel is living with you?
Rachel: Oh Amy, you remember Ross.
Joey: Rachel stuff.
Rachel: What?! No! Im not gonna move out!
(Joey goes to get coffee and Rachel exits as the camera pans to Phoebe and Ross on the couch.)
Rachel: (entering) Oh, hey, Mona!
Mona: Hi! Hi. Hi, Rachel! (to Ross) Whats she doing here?
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving me crazy!
Rachel: No Phoebe! I just need you there for support. I havent told him Im pregnant yet.
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry! Do you need the phone?
Joey: Yeah-eh-eah! (Rachel glares at him) Oh-oh, sorry, I-I knew what he meant.
Rachel: Why? You saw it? Is it scary?
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, Joey and Rachel are there to give Jessica her award.]
Rachel: Yeah! Yeah. Theyre theyre-theyre my friends, uh, Monica Stephanopolus and uh, and Chandler Acidofolus.
Rachel: Uh! Its horrible!
Rachel: Oh, my God!
[Scene: Joeys in the front entrance watching for Rachel. The bridesmaid he met at the rehearsal dinner come in.)
Joey: Its Rachel.
Ross: I was really upset about Rachel and Paolo, and I think I had too much tequila, and Nora- um, Mrs. Mom- your Bing- was just being nice, y'know, and- But nothing happened, nothing- Ask Joey, Joey, uh, came in-
[Scene: Ross and Rachels. Rachel is standing in front of the TV holding a video.]
Rachel: Yeah. (She goes out to join her in the hall and starts looking for the dropped socks.)
Joey: Its Rachel.
Ross: Rachel?!
Joey: Yes. I like Rachel.
RACH: And ya know what, now I've got closure. [Rachel slams the door and locks it. She sits down, visibly upset. She puts her head in her hands and begins to cry. Ross comes back and is standing outside the window. When Rachel regroups and gets back up to finish closing, she sees him. She smiles. She goes to open the door and can't get the lock undone.] ROSS: Try the bottom one. [She opens the door and they kiss.] [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler answers the door to find Monica.] CLOSING CREDITS CHAN: Monica, it's 6:30 in the morning. We're not working out, it's over. MNCA: No way, with one pound to go, c'mon. We're workin', we're movin', we're in the zone we're groovin'. CHAN: OK, I don't, I don't mind the last pound. OK, in fact I kind of like the last pound. OK, so don't make me do anything that I'll regret. MNCA: Ooh, what'cha gonna do, fat boy, huh? What? CHAN: Nothing, except tell you, uh, I think it's wonderful how much energy you have. MNCA: Well, thanks. CHAN: I mean, especially considering how tough it's been for you to find work. MNCA: Well, you know. CHAN: You know, I mean, you can't tell your parents you were fired because they'd be disappointed. MNCA: [sad] Uh-huh. CHAN: And it's not as if you have a boyfriend's shoulder to cry on. MNCA: Well no, but um. CHAN: I mean, if it were me, I think I'd have difficulty just getting out of bed at all. MNCA: Y'know, I try to stay positive. . . CHAN: So, you feel like goin' for a run? MNCA: Alright. CHAN: Because, you know, you don't have to. If you want, you could just take a nap right here. MNCA: OK. Just for a little while. CHAN: OK. [Puts an afghan over her and dances into his room]
Ross: Um, you you like Rachel?
Gunther: Rachel?!!
Rachel: Whoa!!
Rachel: Okay. (The nurse exits.) Oh man, I swear if they sold these at Pottery Barn
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Wow that was a big one.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Chandler are on the couch.]
Ross: Rachel whos carrying my baby? Rachel?
Rachel: Oh-oh! Okay, shes kicking!
Rachel: Oh, its so sad they never had a chance to meet.
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Well, whats he like?!
Rachel: Oh, I was just gonna ask!
Rachel: Oh sure. Older?
Rachel: Of course, of course.
Rachel: ...is something I'm very interested in! Oh please, do not tell Ross. He still believes that (in a deep voice, mocking Ross) what's in the inside is important...
CHANDLER and JOEY: Woah, hey, yo. [Rachel and Ross move]
Phoebe: Hmm, something bad to tell Rachel Bad news for Rachel, what could that be?!
Rachel: (going through the mail) Oh look! A letter from my mom.