words in movies
[Scene: The hospital, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are in the waiting room, waiting for Carol and Susan to arrive.]
Rachel: Oh, Ross, relax. It's probably like two dollars for the first contraction, and then fifty cents for each additional contraction.
(Everyone looks at Rachel as though she made a tasteless comment.)
Rachel: What, it's ok when Chandler does it?
Chandler: (to Rachel) You see what I mean.
(They both leave just as Rachel enters the room, holding a cup.)
Rachel: Hi, I thought you might like some ice chips.
Rachel: And if you need anything else, I(notices the handsome Dr. Franzblau)do not believe we've met. Hi. I'm, uh, Rachel Green. I'm Carol's... ex-husband's... sister's roommate.
Rachel: Oh, that's funny!
(Rachel enters, in a formal dress.)
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: Yeah, well, it's an important day. I wanna look nice. Um, has uh Dr. Franzblau been by?
Rachel: Well, where is he? He is supposed to be here. (Pause) What if the baby needs him?
Chandler: Rachel, what is the deal with you and doctors, anyway? Was, like, your father a doctor?
Rachel: Yeah, why?
[Scene: Carol's room, Rachel and Dr. Franzblau are there with her.]
Rachel: No, honey, they're not, but don't worry, because we are going to find them, and until we do, we are all here for you, ok?
Rachel: Ok?
Rachel: (to Dr. Franzblau) Ok, so anyway, you were telling me about Paris, it sounds fascinating.
Dr. Franzblau: It really was. There was this great little pastry shop right by my hotel. (Carol sits up in pain, Rachel and Dr. Franzblau casually lay her back down) There you go, dear.
[Scene: The Waiting Room, Rachel and Dr. Franzblau have gone to get coffee.]
Rachel: (anxiously) No, no, not at the moment, no, I'm not. Are you?
Rachel: Right, yeah, I've heard that about cute doctors.
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: I'm a waitress.
Rachel: (getting the point) Yeah. Gotcha.
Rachel: Ok. That's fine. (takes her earrings out)
Rachel: Yeah, honey, they wouldn't miss this.
Rachel: Oh, god, I can't believe one of us actually has one of these.
Rachel: Oh, I know. Look at him.
Rachel: You guys wanna get some coffee?
Chandler: Well, this was great. Ill give you a call. We should do it again sometime. (Rachel is disappointed)
Rachel: (takes off her robe) Oh! Look what happened! {Don't get your hopes up guys, we only get to see her from the back or from the neck up. Its times like these I wish that the networks would broadcast some nudity other than Denis Franz's butt.} (In her head.) Huh, check me out! I'm in my kitchen naked! I'm picking up an orange. (Does so) I'm naked! (Goes into the living room) Lighting the candles, naked, and carefully. (She backs anything that might have a point like a candle on her body away.)
Rachel: How long?
Rachel: Okay, I need a date! (runs to her bedroom)
Rachel: He is so cute!
(As Barry exits Robbie stares at Rachel.)
Rachel: I, I didn't say any... I sw... I did not say anything, I swear. He stopped by.
Rachel: Yeah. So don't move, okay? Just stay here and... (nods towards Ross) maybe close your blinds at night.
Rachel: (worried and shocked) Yeah, sure Mr. Zelner, for you anythingminute. Okay. Fine. (To Tag) Abort the plan, abort the plan. (She start to usher Tag out.)
Rachel: Oh, not much. I-I got a job.
Rachel: Okay well Ross! Stop it please! Wait a minute! (Motions for him to follow her lead, but he angrily shakes his head no. So she pokes him.)
Rachel: Uh, Pheebs? Who's George Snuffalopagus?
Rachel: I already fed her.
Rachel: Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight with you Ross! Look, urrgh, maybe we should take a break.
Phoebe: (to Rachel) What's the matter? Why so scrunchy?
Rachel: Not even with your best friend.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Rachel is trying to repair the thing she broke earlier, but gets interrupted by hearing Ross at the door. She panics and throws the thing into the kitchen. And runs to the couch as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Who?
Rachel: Don't you have a laundry room in your building?
(Cut to Ross and Rachel, talking next to one of the tables.)
Rachel: Sure.
Rachel: (bursts into the room) Joey! Joey!
Rachel: Hello? Who are we spying on?
Ross: Okay. (Ben enters) Ben? Come here. All right, Im gonna leave you here with Aunt Rachel for about an hour. Okay? Are you gonna be okay?
Rachel: Yeah, love. Its a tricky business isnt it?
Ross: I uhm... Well, I sang... (Rachel gasps) well actually I rapped... Baby Got Back... (Rachel's face changes from excited to angry)
Rachel: Ohh, I mean its just so realistic!
Rachel: Okay, wow, wow, wow. Watch the tongue people, we've got a baby over here.
Rachel: What?
Rachel: What's that?
Rachel: So c'mon, you guys, tell me all the dirt!
Frank: Yeah! Hey, do Monica and Rachel work there?
(Rachel throws some of hers down.)
(Rachel starts to load her clothes.)
Rachel: So what should we do? Should we start looking for a new place?
Rachel: Yeah. (Stops and starts doing the I-have-to-go-to-the-bathroom dance.)
Rachel: Yeah, but, there were no suds.
Rachel: Absolutely! Absolutely. I d... it’s just a little weird, it’s you, and it’s me, it's just gonna take some getting used to.
Rachel: Yes! Id love to! Have her come by the office.
Rachel: What uh-oh?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachels, Monica is reading a book as Rachel returns.]
Rachel: Ross, what's the matter?
Rachel: Im funny? Oh thank God! Well hey, Ive got a ton of these! Umm, oh hearDo you want a good one? Heres a good one. Umm, you uh, you take a quarter, take a quarter and, and you blacken the edge. Right? (Does so.) And then you say to person, I bet you cant roll this quarter from your forehead to your chin without it leaving your face. And then when they do it, theyre left with a big black pencil line right down the center of their face.
Rachel: Come on, show me.
Rachel: ah ha ha. ah ha ha. <evil meancing laughter> It's forty five.
[Scene: The Hallway, Rachel walks up the stairs and knocks on Joeys door.]
Rachel: But I haven't used my card in weeks!
RACHEL: Well that sounds kinda cool, kinda like The Hobbit.
Rachel: (to Ross) Yes! Did you see that?
Ross: (coming back in with Rachel) Hey, you guys! What do you, what do you think about making that beach trip an annual thing?
Rachel: Are you sure?
Rachel: Oh, are you sure you're ok?
Rachel: Where's Chandler?
Rachel: Honey, hes about to go hit on Isabella Rosselini. Im just sorry we dont got popcorn.
Rachel: Just stop it! Come on!
Rachel: No!! You are getting married! This is all I have.
[Scene: Rachels Office, Joey is knocking on the door holding a hand over a spot on his shirt.]
Jill: (To Rachel) Daddy cut me off.
Rachel: Even so, I think I'm gonna pick Ross.
Rachel: Please, no, go, that'd be fine!
Paul: Ross, look, I know Ive been giving you a lot of jabs and its partly because Im very protective of Lizzie, and partly because well, they just keep coming to me. But I have to admit that after all the wonderful things that Lizzie has told me and the many, many, (pause) many stories that Rachel has told me that, well (pause) youre not (pause) all bad.
Rachel: Whoa, wait, listen, I think Im just gonna talk to Ross about what he think it meant.
Rachel: What is it?
Rachel: I didnt have to, because I was wearing my I heart Ross sandwich board and ringing my bell.
Joey: (drinking a beer) Look at this clown! Just because hes got a bigger boat he thinks he can take up the whole river. (Yelling) Get out of the way jackass! (To Rachel) Who names his boat Coast Guard anyway?
Rachel: Tah-daaah!
Rachel: Well, whaddya think?
Rachel: Oh, yeah, yeah. Actually, I got the extended disco version, with three choruses of "You'll never make it on your own".
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is sitting the now heeled Rosita as Rachel is sitting in the newly arrived Francette. Francette is one of those new chairs from La-Z-Boy that has and does everything except cook and go to the bathroom for you. Its got a small refrigerator under one armrest it has phone jacks for the Internet and regular phone, and so much more.]
Rachel: Ubb.
Rachel: That was amazing. I can't even send back soup.
(They hug. And quickly that hug turns into a heated make out session, right there on the waiting room couch. Chandler, Rachel, and Monica quickly make their exits.)
(Rachel enters from her room.)
Rachel: Honey, someday you are gonna make some man the luckiest guy in the world.
Rachel: Who is being loud?
(Rachel yanks on his legs again and he groans in pain.)
Phoebe: Goodie! Thanks. So, how is it living with Rachel again? I mean, apart from the great food.
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Phoebe is eating breakfast with Monica while Frank is playing with num-chucks on the balcony]
Rachel: Well, you know, no suds, no save.
Rachel: Y'know I cant believe I even thought about getting back together again! We are so over!!
Rachel: Are you drunk?!
Monica: I don't know. Rachel I'm-I'm sorry that I hurt your ankles.
[Phoebe turns back around but Rachel is gone. Ross enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
Rachel: Wow, you guys, this is big.
Rachel: (on phone) Yeah, oh my God, tomorrow! That, no, its perfect. Oh God, thank you soo much. Great! Bye! (hangs up phone) I got the interview!
[We then go into another set of flashbacks of famous fights. The first is the second breakup of Ross and Rachel from The One With The Jellyfish.]
Rachel: That had to hurt!
Rachel: (on phone) Hi, Mindy. Hi, it-it's Rachel. Yeah, I'm fine. I-I saw Barry today. Oh, yeah, yeah he-he told me. No, no, it's okay. I hope you two are very happy, I really do. Oh, oh, and Mind, y'know, if-if everything works out, and you guys end up getting married and having kids- and everything- I just hope they have his old hairline and your old nose. (Slams the phone down.) (To everyone) Okay, I know it was a cheap shot, but I feel so much better now.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Shhh! Im on a call! (On phone) Umm well yeah, you can pick it up tonight, say 8:30? At-at my apartment. Its umm, its umm 5 Morton Street, Apartment 14, umm and then maybe yknow after we can grab a bite to eat or whatever. (Listens) Okay, well okay Ill see you then. (Listens) Bye. (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo, I mean he had already named both my breasts! ...Ooh. Did I just share too much?
(Ross sadly hangs up the phone, while Phoebe looks at him. Cut to Rachel at the gate. She gives her boarding pass to the gate attendant, and she goes onboard. The gate attendant closes the door and locks it.)
Rachel: Um... Ross?
Phoebe: Oh, Rachel.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering the living room from her bedroom.]
Rachel: Yeah right.
Rachel: You don't.
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: You do?
Rachel: If you hold a spider.