words in movies
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is showing Ross, Rachel, Joey, and Phoebe his engagement ring again.]
Rachel: Yeah? Well, you should know. Youve bought like a billion of em.
Rachel: Ohh
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey are there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: (entering) Hey!
Rachel: Are any of you guys free tonight? My boss is hosting this charity event for underprivileged kids and the more people I bring, the better I look. So, Monica? Chandler?
Rachel: Oh my God, Im so sorry.
Chandler: I just get mad when Rachel doesnt remember where were going.
Rachel: How about you guys? (Points to Phoebe and Joey.)
Rachel: I think so.
Rachel: Hey! Ross, listen can you come to a charity event tonight?
Rachel: See? Now, he could date her.
Chandler: Will you marry me? Will you marry me? (Makes like a gun with his fingers.) Hey, you marry me! (He gives up as Joey, Rachel, Phoebe, and Ross slink in all excited.) Whats going on little elves?
Rachel: (breaking up) Were just really very excited about this charity event that we have to go to.
[Scene: The Charity Event, theyre holding a silent auction, Rachel is looking at one of the items and Phoebe walks up and hands her a glass of wine.]
Rachel: Oh! Thank you!
Rachel: Uh well, uh this is a silent auction. They lay out all the stuff here and then you write down your offer and then the highest bid gets it.
Rachel: (suddenly worried) Uh, wh-why?
(Rachels boss, Mr. Thompson walks up.)
Mr. Thompson: Nice to see you Rachel.
Rachel: Oh, hi!
Rachel: Someone? I brought people. Mr. Thompson, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, this is Mr. Thompson. (She introduces them.) Hes the head of my department.
Rachel: And I also brought my friend Joey
Rachel: Well, yknow I-I dont know where he is.
Mr. Thompson: Well, I hope youre gonna bid on some things Rachel.
Rachel: Well, yknow what? Actually, I was about to bid on this lovely trip to Paris.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Thank you. (Mr. Thompson walks away and after hes left.) Okay, (writing her bid down) twenty dollars.
Rachel: Ugh! So close!
Rachel: What are you doing?
Rachel: Well now its an empty bar.
Rachel: What?! What?! What?!
Rachel: Joey! It is an auction! You dont guess, you buy!
Rachel: Joey! Sit down! (Pulls him down.)
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are sitting at their table.]
Rachel: What were you thinking?!
Rachel: Wh?!
Rachel: Why would a charity give away a free boat?!
Rachel: Ugh!
Rachel: Phoebe, dont you think youve had enough to drink?
Rachel: How is you drinking helping the kids?
Joey: (To Rachel) Hey, I was pretty close. (She just glares at him.) Uhh, so bad news. Umm, I cant buy the boat, I dont have any money.
(Mr. Thompson looks shocked and at Rachel, she suddenly starts laughing.)
Rachel: Joey! Joey, good one! (Mr. Thompson starts to laugh.)
(After hes left, Rachel stops laughing and glares at Joey again.)
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey! You cant leave Joey! You agreed to buy that boat, all right?! That is a contract! And plus if you leave, my boss is gonna kill me!
Rachel: I know. Okay. (Whispering and thinking.) Okay. Okay. All right. All right, this is what were gonna do, we are gonna go to the next highest bidder, and we are just gonna let them buy it, and then youre just gonna pay the difference.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Not great.
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel and Phoebe are sitting at the table as Joey approaches.]
Joey: Rach! Rachel! Okay, the next highest bidder is at table one.
Rachel: Oh great!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Why do you care about the guy who won the Paris trip?
[Cut to Joey and Rachel approaching table one.]
Joey: Ahh, yes. (Pushes Rachel in front of himself so that she could do the talking.)
Rachel: Oh well, hello. This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman day sailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of $18,000.
Rachel: (To Joey) Okay. Okay. (Shushes him.)
Rachel: Ohh
Rachel: Y-Yeah! What-what is your wifes name?
Rachel: Pam! Oh God okay, just imagine this, "The Pam."
Rachel: Okay, uh-uh imagine this, "The Mr. Bowmont."
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Rachel: (To Joey) What?! What?!
Rachel: But Joey you dont have $20,000!
Rachel: (entering) Hey! (Sees Monica, gasps, and runs over to her.) Oh my God youre here, let me see your hand!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is bringing Phoebe some coffee.]
Rachel: Isnt it incredible?! Monica and Chandler, gettin married.
Rachel: Ohh I mean two best friends falling in love, how often does that happen?
Rachel: No! Im so happy for them!
Rachel: Im so happy and not at all jealous.
Rachel: I mean Im probably 98% happy, maybe 2% jealous. And I mean whats 2%? Thats nothing.
Rachel: Yeah me too.
Rachel: (staring at him) Whno, but yknow who did stop in here looking for ya, Tennille.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are still talking.]
Rachel: Were gonna find love!
Rachel: Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a little guarantee though.
Rachel: Well yknow, some people make deals with a friend, like if neither of them are married by the time theyre 40, they marry each other.
Rachel: Exactly!
Rachel: You do?
Rachel: Who?
Rachel: Joey?!
Rachel: Are you serious?!
Rachel: Wh So If neither of you are married by the time youre 40, youre gonna marry Joey.
Rachel: Oh, seriously?
Rachel: Charming.
Rachel: Yeah.
Monica: Have you seen Rachel? Or a mirror?
Rachel: Hey you!
Rachel: Oh thank you. Hey yknow, Im so sorry to hear about you and Elizabeth.
Rachel: Yeah, love. Its a tricky business isnt it?
Rachel: So what do you say we make a pact? If you and I are both single by the time were 40, we get married. I mean, we know each other, we like each other, and weve-weve already slept together so yknow therell be no surprises there! You know what I mean? No like, "Whats that?!"
Rachel: Exactly.
Rachel: What? Who?
Rachel: Phoebe?! Wait abut-but she just, she said that Joey was her backup.
Rachel: Ross! I just had a conversation with her, and she said that she and Joey made a deal!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is reading as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Phoebe! You picked Joey and Ross?! You can not have two backups!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Phoebe you cant have both of them! You have to pick one!
Joey: This is crazy! Hey look, I wanna switch to Rachel!
Ross: Ooh, I wanna switch to Rachel too!
(Rachel gets all happy.)
Rachel: Oh God, Phoebe!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Im talking about massages.
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: Okay, yknow what?! I know-I know how to settle this! All right here, this is what were gonna do! Im gonna write Joey on one napkin (does so) and Im gonna right Ross on the other napkin (does so) and we are going to pick one! And that person is going to be our backup! Okay?
(Rachel mixes them up in her hands, moves them all around, and puts her hands behind her back.)
Rachel: Pick one.
Phoebe: Left! (Rachel hands her the napkin in her left hand and they both unfold and read them.) Thank you.
Rachel: Youre welcome.
Rachel: (reading) Joey! (Pause) We should just switch.
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
Rachel: Ohhh, this is the least jealous Ive ever been!
Rachel: Oh hell, hes done this three times! He knows what its about!
Rachel: Okay. Well be careful with her, shes really tiny.
Rachel: What?
Rachel: No. I was just going to do this myself. (Joey makes a sarcastic laugh.)
Rachel: Ross, this is not how we wanted you to find out about this. You have every right to go nuts.
Rachel: What? What?!
Rachel: Oh!!
Ross: Now, hold on! Hold on! (Stops him) Look, look, your daughter and I are supposed to leave tonight for our honeymoon, now-now you-you tell her that Im gonna be at that airport and I hope that shell be there too! Oh yeah, I said Rachels name, but it didnt mean anything, Okay? Shes-shes just a friend and thats all! (Rachel sits down, depressed.) Thats all! Now just tell Emily that I love her and that I cant imagine spending my life with anyone else. Please, promise me that youll tell her that.
Rachel: No, you wait! This is ridiculous!
Chandler: Rachel, wait, wait.
Rachel: (holding the phone out to Chandler) Chandler? It's Alan, he wants to speak to you.
[Camera pans to the Geller family table. Ross, Rachel, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there.]
Rachel: Rome. Jerk missed his flight.
Rachel: No.
[Scene, A Restaurant, Rachel is on her date, drunk, and is leaving that answering machine message.]
Rachel: Shut up!
Joey: Yeah! All rightLook, I know sometimes itll be hard, okay? But, itll also be really really great. Please Rachel! I-I-I really want you to stay.
(Cut to later. Rachel is in tears)
RACHEL: Ohh, I'm gonna have to get over it. God, see I didn't know that's I had to do, I just have to get over it.
Rachel: Thats right Joey, the chair angel came in and heeled your chair. (She sits down in the chair.)
Rachel: Ohh were not sailing.
Rachel: Hi, I'm Rachel.
Rachel: Yes, my sister's giving us her place for the weekend.
Rachel: Chandler Bing? It's time to see your thing.
Rachel: All right, all right, all right. Last night, I had a dream that, uh, you and I, were...
Rachel: I thought it was Chandler!
Monica: Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (To Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
(Rachel goes up to the door of their bathroom)
Rachel: We're sorry.
RACHEL: That's not the end.
Rachel: I could not have done this without you.
Rachel: You were supposed to be in there so I could see your thing!
Ross: Hey Pheebs, could you please not put your feet up on my new (On Rachels glare) old sheet?
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel and Phoebe are looking at some photos and they're sitting next to the window.]
Rachel: Monica! I couldnt find him for two hours! He was having sex with Amy Welch!
Rachel: Wow.
Rachel: Kinda hurtin my hand though.
Rachel: Sorry. Paolo's catching an earlier flight.
Rachel: Oh, God, he's such a pig,
Rachel: Wait a minute! What are you gonna tell Joanna?
Rachel: What happened?
RACHEL: God, oh God Monica, I forgot. This is our first date.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is on the phone.]
Rachel: Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, it was really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, but um, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um, Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right.
Rachel: Do what, do what?
Rachel: Alright, c'mon! (Miserably) Let's play Twister!
Rachel: Well, you were pretty damn good.
RACHEL: I can't believe this is happening.
Rachel: Oh really? Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I taped it? (Joey smiles luridly) Oh forget it! (Ross enters.) Oh there he is now, the father of my child, the porn king of the west village.
(Cut to inside Central Perk where Rachel is helping Phoebe. Chandler and Monica enter.)
Rachel: (On the phone) Okay, he's a, he's a black capuchian monkey with a white face... (Enter Ross) ...with, with Russian dressing and, and pickles on the side. Okay. Thanks.
Rachel: Well, last night you seemed to know your way around the table.
Rachel: Or?
Rachel: Tommyyyy! Say, whats your favourite thing about summer?
Rachel: Yeah. Just to be sure I'm gonna call Dr. Wiener.
(Monica and Rachel look at Phoebe strangely.)
Rachel: "Indeed there isn't"... I should really get back to work.
Rachel: This is so awesome! College guys are so cute!
Rachel: Thats your whole name, okay of course it is! Okay, well lets-lets just have a look-see here. (Looking at his resume)
Rachel: Oh God, oh. Great, Monica, y'know what, you could've called, I have been up here, I've been worried...
Rachel: Okay now Joey, y'know that since you're returning all of this stuff right after the audition you're gonna have to wear underwear?
Rachel: (to Chandler) Well, there's a kiss that he won't forget for a couple of hours, y'know.
Rachel: Yeah, well, it's an important day. I wanna look nice. Um, has uh Dr. Franzblau been by?
Rachel: Yeah, it is amazing it lasted that long.
Rachel: Burning's good. Yeah, I got stuff to burn.
Rachel: Okay, let me just change.
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh, that is so hot. She walks around him to the other side)
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross is working on his laptop when Rachel enters with Emma.]
Rachel: Okay, okay, could we change the subject, please?
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
Rachel: Hey Mon, lets give Pete a chance Come on, he was funny, he seems really nice, and that check thing was adorable.
Rachel: Oh, my god.
Rachel: So, um, will you bring the truck?
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Get off.
Chandler: Hello Rachel.
Rachel: ... the WENUS?
(She goes to look out the window at Rosss apartment and sees Jill staring at her and closing the drapes with an evil look on her face. Rachel is stunned into silence.)
Rachel: I don't!
Rachel: Oh...see... but Joanne loved Chachi! That's the difference!
Rachel: The meeting with the guy went great?
Rachel: What are you going to make?
Rachel: Oh..Go..Oh..and I told my boss that someone made out with Ralph Lauren. If she finds out that I lied to her, she is going to hate me even more. Phoebe!!
Rachel: I know! It's like I'm being punished for not having this disgusting, poisoning habit!
Rachel: My God! What happened to you?
Rachel: (entering) Hey Ross! I brought reinforcements.
Rachel: Oh, I gotta get my ticket!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is holding a book as she, Rachel, and Monica drink some tea as Chandler looks on.]
Rachel: (hurt) Waitressing?
Rachel: But, but?
Rachel: I love how he cares so much about stuff. If I squint I can pretend hes Alan Alda.
Rachel: Okay, uh, you let me go grocery shopping, and I buy laundry detergent, but it's not the one with the easy-pour spout.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross are there, Rachel is serving brownies.]
(Rachel gets up and ushers them into the hall, as they pass Joshua, he leaps onto the counter to avoid them. Rachel drops them off in the hall, and knocks on Joeys door.)
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is closing up and Ross comes in. Get your Kleenex.]
Monica: Chandler, please dont think I was trying to pressure you. Phoebe and Rachel
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Rachel is in bed, Ross is fooling around, and Dr. Long is checking on Rachel.]
Rachel: Who was that?
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Done.