words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel are eating breakfast.]
Rachel: Oh! Good thing Chandlers not here, he always wins at this game.
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Umm, do you guys have any juice?
Rachel: My boss, Joanna? Wow, that mustve been awkward.
Rachel: (laughs) You ah, you didnt say Yes to that did you?
Joanna: (Coming out of the shower wearing nothing but a towel) Hello, Rachel. (She goes into Chandlers bedroom)
Rachel: What is she doing here?
Rachel: I dont understand! Last time you went out with her you said she was a big, dull dud.
Rachel: Well, last time I almost got fired. You must end it, you must end it now!
Rachel: Chandler!! (He turns around quickly) Promise me, you will end it.
Rachel: Thank you.
Joey: Yeah-eh-eah! (Rachel glares at him) Oh-oh, sorry, I-I knew what he meant.
[Cut to Monica and Rachels apartment, all are there.]
Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Rachel: Oh yeah, I totally agree.
[Cut to Monica and Rachels, theyre all there playing cards.]
[Cut to Joannas outer office, where Rachel and Sophie work. They are both coming back from lunch.]
Rachel: Thats weird, she locked the door.
Rachel: Okay, swear you wont tell, but when Mark left he gave me a key to Joannas office. Do you wanna see the list?
(Rachel unlocks and opens the door to reveal a half-naked Chandler handcuffed to the chair. They both gasp and Chandler stares at them in shock and surprise.)
(Rachel and Sophie both back out and close the door without saying anything.
[Cut to Rachels office as her intercom buzzes.]
Rachel: (answering it) (angrily) What?!
Chandler: (in a serious, businesslike tone) Rachel, could I see you for a moment?
(Rachel goes into talk to Chandler.)
Rachel: You promised you would break up with her!
Rachel: And the fact that you were jeopardising my career never entered your mind?!
Rachel: Y'know what Chandler, you got yourself into those cuffs, you get yourself out of them.
Rachel: Oh, Chandler!! All right, this is it! (Grabs the key) You never see Joanna again!
Rachel: You never come into this office again!
Rachel: You give me back my Walkman!
Rachel: Well, then I lost it. You buy me one!
Chandler: You got it! Here we go! Come on! This is great! (Rachel goes over and unlocks the handcuffs) Ahhh! (He starts rubbing his wrist)
Rachel: Does it hurt?
Rachel: Wait a minute! What are you gonna tell Joanna?
Rachel: When she sees that youre gone, shes gonna know that I let you out, and that I was in here, and Im gonna get fired!
Rachel: No, theres nothing to make up, shes gonna know that I have a key to her office, Ive got to get you locked up back the way you were! (She tries to drag him over to the chair, but Chandler stops her.)
(He starts to put his pants on, but Rachel manages to drag him to the chair. When they get to the chair, Chandler drops his pants and knocks the chair away. Rachel then backs him up and locks him to the top drawer of a filing cabinet.)
[Scene: Joannas office, Rachel and Chandler are having a little tug-of-war with his pants.]
Rachel: Chandler! Chandler, please, I have to get you locked up back the way you were, I am sooo gonna lose my job, shes very private about her office. Now I know why.
Rachel: What if I clean your bathroom for a month?
Chandler: It still wouldnt be clean. (Rachel makes an Eww, disgusting! face) All I want is my freedom.
Rachel: Foot rubs for a month!
Rachel: Ill take all of your photos and put them into photo albums!
Rachel: Sophie sit!!
Rachel: No! God, would you just calm down!
[Scene: Joannas office, Rachel and Chandler are still negotiating.]
Rachel: I ah, will buy and wrap all of your Christmas gifts.
Rachel: I ah Oh! Ill squeeze you fresh orange juice every morning!
Rachel: (happily) Yeah!!
Rachel: Doh!! (pause) Ive got it!
Rachel: I have so got it. Theres gonna be rumours about this, theres no way to stop it. Sophie knows, Monica and Phoebe know.
Rachel: Oh, I called them. And when they ask me what I saw, I can be very generous (Holds her hands far apart) or very (In a high pitched voice) stingy.
Rachel: I can make you a legend. I can make you this generations Milton Berle.
Rachel: Ohh, not compared to you. (Chandler nods in agreement)
Joey, Rachel, and Ross: Hey!
Chandler: (to Rachel) I love you. (Kisses her on the forehead)
(She motions for them to come closer, they lean in and she whispers what Rachel told her. The guys both lean back laughing.]
Rachel: So did you break up with Joanna?
Rachel: What?!
[Scene: Rachels office, Rachel is coming in for the day.]
Rachel: Its me! Good morning!
Joanna: Rachel, could you come in here for a moment, please?
Rachel: Yeah, sure. Umm, they didnt have poppy seed bagels, so I (Enters Joannas office and sees her handcuffed to her chair wearing nothing but a slip) Oh my word!
Rachel: Oh, yeah! Yeah!
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Barbara! Hi, how are you? (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) No, I understand. Yeah. Oh, oh, come on, no, I'm fine. Don't be silly. Yeah... oh, but you know, if-if anything else opens up, pleaHello? Hello? (hangs up phone, very depressed)
Rachel: (thinks) Yknow, I dont-I dont know. Let me, let me check. (As she heads for her office, she stops glances over her should at Tag, looks into her office, and finds the folder on her desk.)
Rachel: Well, Joey probably thinks Ill just embarrass him. Yknow, he thinks Im some kind of a soap opera nutWhich Im not! Im not. Although I do know that your uh, your favorite ice cream flavor is butter pecan. (Starts stroking his arm) And uh, and that your-your dogs name is Wally. Well look at that, Im just stroking your arm.
Phoebe: Probably? Yeah, I don't like that word. (Chandler and Monica look surprised) Kind of what probably really means. Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, oh, "Your mom probably won't kill herself," yknow? I'm sorry, but I'm not hanging all my hopes of Rachel and I living together on-on "Probably!" Yknow? You gotta take care of yourselves! (She starts to walk out) In this world history teaches us nothing! (Exits)
Joey: Rachel, there you are! Come on, lets serve that dessert already!
Rachel: Well yknow what they say, the 23rd times the charm. (Chandler enters.) Aww, look at you all handsome!
Rachel: Well (At a loss for words, she grabs some of Monica's laundry and throws it on the floor as a diversion to allow Rachel to run back inside and close the door. Monica chases her to find that Rachel had locked the door.)
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is preparing to slip Joshua the note.]
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Rachel, Joey and Charlie are eating fajitas when Ross enters from the kitchen.]
Rachel: Joey, y'know you get any mustard on that bag, you can't return it.
Rachel: (looking into one of her shopping bags) Oh no! I took one of Ross' bags by mistake, and one of mine is missing.
Rachel: Ohh! Its so nice to meet you. (She goes over and shakes their hands.) Hello.
Rachel: (humouring him) Oh, well you know who I love the most?
Rachel: OH MY GOD!!! (She holds her hands up in triumph and the gang all look at her.) Sorry, I was just imagining what itd be like to catch the money bouquet.
Ross: Take thee, Rachel...(All his friends have looks of shock on their faces. He realizes what he said. Quickly he says.) Emily. (A slight chuckle.) Emily.
Rachel turns to Ross: Oh whose side are you on? <back to Amy> I'm not giving you Emma because there is no way you could handle the responibility of a child.
Rachel: What-wh-what so well just stay married forever?!
Rachel: (to Monica) I mean is that woman capable of talking about anything else but sex?
[Rachel, in her bridesmaid dress, complete with hat, which makes her look like Little Bo Peep, and Ross enter]
Rachel: Seriously Pheebs, it's not gonna be that kind of a party.
Russell: And well need you and Rachel to testify before a judge.
Rachel: Because it is too damn hard Ross. I can't even begin to explain to you how much I'm gonna miss you. When I think about not seeing you every day, it makes me not want to go... Okay, so if you think that I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. It's because you mean more to me. So there, all right, there's your goodbye... Oh!
RACHEL: OK, here we go. Honey, I'm sorry, they were all out of apple pie, someone just got the last piece.
Rachel: Ross, it just wouldnt have been feasible.
Ross: Yeah, I'm a friend of Rachel Green's. Uhm, actually we met at the Christmas party about two years ago.
Rachel: Alright. Well then how about I call your supervisor, and I tell her that you shot my friend in the ass with a dart?
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are about to go inside.]
Rachel: No! Im not! I-I-I just think its wrong! Its-its that ImHere I am about to pop and hes out picking up some shop girl at Sluts R Us!
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
Rachel: Yeah. Thought I'd give it a shot. I'm still on the first chapter. Now, do you think his 'love stick can be liberated from its denim prison'?
Rachel: Och, god. (seeing Emma) Oh, thank god, you�re okay. I�m so sorry we left you. Mom never gonna leave you again. Never ever ever again. Uch.
Rachel: You know the book says that whenever shes sleeping I should be sleeping so (She gives Monica thumbs and goes to lay down)
Rachel: Pheebs, I dont know what to say. I guess the flea market was just better last time.
Rachel: Okay. Its okay. Were gonna be okay. Yknow what? Its okay. Im gonna, Im gonna, Im gonna boil some water and just rip up some sheets!
Rachel: So wh..? He's smart, he's qualified. Give me one good reason we shouldn't try him out.
Ross: This is crazy. I mean, six years? And because of me you guys aren't gonna be together? Can I ask you something? Really, what is this thing with you and Rachel?
Rachel: Oh we justwe drove each other crazy!
Rachel: Oh okay, Ill fix that to. Whats her e-mail address?
Ross: Everyone? I would like to make a toast to Rachel and Joey.
Rachel: Okay, come onJoey, Ill buy you a new one! All right? Well go down to the store right now and well-well get you a new chair.
(Phoebe and Rachel both pause, look at each other, and go press their breasts against him. Which Joey doesnt mind, of course.)
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, its actually Joey and Rachels. Phoebe is trying to convince Rachel to switch with her and live with Monica as Joey looks on.]
Ross: You should've seen the look on her face. I don't want Rachel to hate me! I don't know what to do.
Rachel: Okay please tell me that this is just one of your jokes that you do that I dont get.
Rachel: (sarcastic) No, no, that's ok. You won fair and square. I'm so sad!
Rachel: Ross, I swear, I dont know.
Phoebe: Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!! Hey!!! (they all stop fighting, Chandler continues to dance.) Look what youre doing to Chandler!! (Chandler finally stops) (to Ross and Rachel) Yeah, look, we know this is really, really hard for you guys. Okay? (Ross starts to leave) You dont, all right you dont have to love each other, okay? You dont, you dont even have to like each other much right now. But please, you have to figure out a way to be around each other.
Rachel: Oh, I know, I know, its-its so, its so totally like, "Whoa! Can we do this?" Yknow, I mean, but I mean it just feels right! Dont you think? It does! I mean, it just feels right, dont you think?
Rachel: Oh God I just can not imagine what is gonna happen if Chandler doesnt show up!
Rachel: Oh hell, hes done this three times! He knows what its about!
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are sitting at their table.]
Rachel: Hey! Joey, would you mind giving me and Ross a hand moving his couch?
Rachel: Well, wait a minute! The puss is good! It means it's healing! (Runs after him.)
Monica: Nice work everybody! So much for the yknow, "You can drive it, but dont tell Rachel" plan!
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, Chandler slowly closes the door, and we hear Rachel from the living room.]
Rachel: I mean its the end of an era!
Rachel: You are so just doing this out of spite.
Ross: Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. (He gets up leaving Phoebe in shock.)
Rachel: Okay, well, that's one less thing we have to do on Monday.
(Rachel enters the room and checks the answering machine)
Rachel: I mean, you know... Ross and I haven't dated in like... six years...
Rachel: (on phone) I've got magic beans. (Listens) Never-never mind.
Rachel: I dont know, I dont know, werent you the guy that told me to quit my job when I had absolutely nothing else to do. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!!
Rachel: No honey, okay, okay, you wanna know why Ross canceled the date? Because I asked him to.
Rachel: Does anybody need more coffee?
Chandler: Hey, by any chance did either of pick uh Rachel for your secret Santa, cause I wanna trade for her.
Monica: Yes there is! He's black and white and shaggy and [Cut to Monicas apartment] he's sitting next to Rachel and licking Rachel's hand.
Rachel: In Human Resources!!!!!!
Rachel: Oh wait! Yknow what? I cant, I cant look at it. I cant. Somebody else tell me, somebody tell me.
[Another series of flashbacks begins with Episode 413: The One With Rachels Crush, Joey is telling Rachel and Phoebe how he picks up women.]
(An 80's Rachel and fat Monica walk into the party room. Both with funny hair-do's and clothes)
Rachel: (gasps) Oh! Oh my God! I thought she was on Atkins.
Amy: Oh! It's Ross... Hey Ross! (She says hey to the guy at the falafel stand, whose only similarity with Ross would be his black hair.) Hello-oo Ross! (to Rachel) He's rude!
Rachel: So, like, you guys all have jobs?
(Rachel and Joey hug, and Rachel turns to enter the apartment through the side window again. At that moment Joey tries to climb over the edge of the balcony.)
[Scene: The Anniversary Party, Ross and Rachel have just gotten another wedding present.]
Joey: Yes, now is when you swoop! You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks out of there, the first guy Rachel sees is you, She's gotta know that you're everything he's not! You're like, like the anti-Paolo!
Rachel: Well, believe it or not, it's true. When Joey and I were together, he was wonderful. He was thoughtful and mature. And for the one week that we went out, he didn't sleep with anybody else!
Rachel: Yes, I did. Thank you very much, it was excellent. (Disembarks)
Rachel: (Sighing) Well I-I think your wrong.
Rachel: Yeah-yeah, did-didnt you use to have a pair? They were really round, burgundy, and they made you look kind of umm
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
All (except Rachel): Congratulations! (Rachel looks devastated)
RACHEL: Uh, I don't know. Why don't you put it right here next to my water?
[cut to Ross who walks up to Rachel who is eating a baked pretzel.]
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
Rachel: Oh Joey, I cant believe you brought my boss into this! Im gonna get fired!
Rachel: Thank you. (He goes to leave.) Hey-hey umm, uh, is there, is there any such thing as an annulment shower?
Rachel: Yeah, just give me a minute! (Thinking) Oh well, yes, I can think of one good thing.
(Rachel sticks a marshmallow into Monica’s nose. Monica takes it out of her nose by closing one nostril, and blowing.)
Rachel: Ross, look, I know that some of this stuff is out there, but I mean, come on, look at this, look at this sweater! (she picks up a blue sweater). I mean, this is just beautiful!
Rachel: Were not gonna do this, all right? Shes just gonna think that were doin it.
Rachel: Yeah, Rachel. And this (points to Monica) is Ross' sister, Monica. We met at Thanksgiving. (looks around the room as if searching for something more interesting to do).
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are there, discussing the night before.]
Rachel: No, everythings fine. I just gotta go back
Rachel: Okay. All right. (Gets up.) Honey listen. When I tell you what Im about to tell you, I need you to remember that we are all here for you and that we love you.
Rachel: Its not dumb. But, maybe its okay that youre not a part of it. Y'know what I mean? (Ross looks confused) I mean its like, I-I-I like that youre not involved in that part of my life.
Ross: Look, Rachel, this is poker. I play to win, alright? In order for me to win, other people have to lose. So if you're gonna play poker with me, don't expect me to be a 'nice guy,' OK? Cause once those cards are dealt... (claps hands three times)
Rachel: Oh, I can't. Because I-I've seen them.
Rachel: I am! I am a woman who spent a lot of money on a dress and she wants to wear it, because soon she wont be able to fit into it.