words in movies
[Scene: A Restaurant, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are having brunch.]
Rachel: Oh my God! This is it! (She and Phoebe hold hands.) (To Phoebe) I really hope its you!
Rachel: Me too!
Rachel: Okay, bla-bla-bla-bla!! Who is it?!
Rachel: Hypothetically!
Rachel: Uh-hmm.
Monica: Rachel would be Phoebes, I would be Rachels, that way we all get to do it once and no one would get upset.
Rachel: Yeah thats actually a pretty good idea.
Rachel: Well of course we will help you decide! We will do anything we can to help you! Now, I would like to make a toast, to the future Mrs. Chandler Bing (A woman at the table behind them overhears Chandlers name and starts listening closer), my best friend, and truly one of the nicest people that
Rachel: Fine!
Phoebe: Aww, and good luck to you too! (To Monica and Rachel) What a nice lady!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is bringing Rachel some coffee.]
Phoebe: Hey Rachel?
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Really?!
Rachel: Oh my God Phoebe! I mean Im justWait a minute. If Im your maid of honor that means you are Monicas.
Rachel: Ohh! No way Phoebe! I want to be Monicas!
Rachel: Why does it matter so much to you?!
Rachel: What-what if I marry RossOr Joey?
Phoebe: (gasps) You wouldnt! Okay look, Rachel I know you really want to do this, but I-Ive never been maid of honor to anyone before! And I know youve done it at least twice!
Rachel: Yeah but Phoebe
Phoebe: And no, oh please, oh please let me finish. (Rachel stops talking.) Oh I guess that was it.
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Itssince youve never done it before you can be Monicas made of honor.
Rachel: Im gonna marry someone good yknow.
Rachel: Better than Chandler. (Phoebe exhales as if to say, "Like what isnt?")
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is entering, Rachel and Phoebe are already there.]
Rachel: Phoebe is gonna be Monicas maid of honor!
Rachel: (shocked) You have been maid of honor before?!!
Rachel: All right thats it! I am maid of honor!
Rachel: How come you are?!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Well, its better than us deciding.
Rachel: Oh, come on! This is crazy! Cant we just flip a coin?!
Rachel: Okay. Okay fine, yknow what? We will let Ross and Joey decide. (Ross enters.) (In a sexy voice.) Hiiiii, Ross! Sweetie.
Phoebe: Hey there, you handsome thing. (Rachel and Phoebe exit.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are laying out the ground rules for the maid of honor auditions to Rachel and Phoebe.]
Ross: Because its the highest. (Joey shrugs his shoulders) Okay, Rachel youre up first. (Rachel stands up and gets ready.) Situation No. 1: Youre with Monica, the wedding is about to start when Monica gets cold feet. Go! (Joey is playing the part of Monica.)
Rachel: Okay, uh
Rachel: its gonna be okay!
Rachel: Look Monica, getting cold feet is very common. Yknow, its-its just because of all the anticipation and you just have to remember that you love Chandler. And also, I ran out on a wedding. You dont get to keep the gifts.
Rachel: Thanks!
Ross: Yes, very nice Rachel.
Rachel: Thank you judges.
Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: Wait a minute! She just made a scene in the middle of the ceremony!
Rachel: Ohh, wait a minute, we havent pre
Rachel: Okay! Okay! Umm, Websters Dictionary defines marriage as (Ross and Joey start writing.) Okay!! Forget that! That sucks!! Okay, never mind! Forget it! Umm, umm, okay, uh I met, I-I met, I met Monica when we were just a couple of six year olds and I became friends with Chandler when he was 25, although he seemed like a six year old.
Rachel: Thank you. Thank you very much. Umm, Ive known them separately and Ive known them together and-and to know them as a couple is to know that you are truly in the presence of love. So I would like to raise my glass (Grabs a glass and holds it up) to Monica and Chandler and the beautiful adventure they are about to embark upon together. I can think of no two people better prepared for the journey.
Rachel: Aw, thanks!
Phoebe: Okay, I cant believe that Monica and Chandler are getting married. I remember talking about this day with Rachel while we were showering together, naked. (Raises her glass and drinks.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are giving Phoebe and Rachel the results of their election. Somewhat faster than Florida I might add.]
Joey: All right, well first of all I would like to say that you both performed very well. Okay? You should be proud of yourselves. And-and I would also like to say that in this competition there are no losers. Well, except for RachelDamnit!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Well then I demand a recount! (Hmm, I wonder where Ive heard that before.)
Rachel: No! Yknow what? No! No! You thing was so stupid anyway, this was ridiculousWere gonna flip a coin! (Phoebe gasps.) All right?! (She flips the coin.) Heads! (Looks at the coin and grunts in disgust.)
Rachel: Well yknow what? I hope Monica forgives you after you throw her, her vegetarian, voodoo, goddess circley shower! (Runs out.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Rachel enters carrying a shopping bag.]
Rachel: Hi Pheebs.
Rachel: Hi! I just want to apologize. Im really sorry I was a baby.
Phoebe: Thats ridiculous Rachel, we were all babies once. (Rachel looks at her.) Oh, you mean today.
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah, and yknow you-you deserve to win. And-and yknow I was thinking about it, if-if youre Monicas maid of honor that means I get to be yours.
Rachel: Yeah! Oh, umm when-when Monica and Chandler got engaged I started putting some stuff together, yknow just in case
Rachel: Here is a book of poetry that I know Monica loves. And-and ohh God this is funny, look, this is a picture of one Halloween where she dressed up as a bride. (Shows Phoebe the picture.) And look, she made me carry her train, which was weird because I was Wonder Woman. Oh and heres a little purse that I found. (Hands her the purse) Yknow I just thought that maybe they could hold the rings in there.
Rachel: And umm, vintage handkerchiefs yknow cause, people cry at weddings. (Starting to cry.) Im just gonna grab a couple of these.
Rachel: Oh, I forgot this was in here. Umm, this was the uh garter that I was saving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monicas something borrowed and its blue. (Starts to cry again.) Yeah
Rachel: You do? Why?
Rachel: But Pheebs, yknow you earned it.
Rachel: No, I was ten. I just developed early.
Rachel: Hey!
Phoebe: Well, we just decided that Rachel is gonna be your maid of honor.
Monica: (gasps) Ohh, wow! Thats great! (Rachel and Monica hug.) Oh wow! We really have to start planning! I have, I have a lot of really specific ideas! We should probably get together like four times per week. You can come over to my place; well get together before work! What do you say, 6:30, my place? Im so excited! (Runs out leaving Rachel completely stunned and Phoebe laughing.)
Rachel: Yeah okay, you laugh now, but shes gonna be yours. (Phoebe gets suddenly scared.)
(Suddenly Rachel clears her throat and the camera cuts to the rest of the gang staring at them. Needless to say Joey and Ross are shocked and slowly turn their heads to see the gang.)
Rachel: Okay. Well be careful with her, shes really tiny.
Rachel: What?
Rachel: No. I was just going to do this myself. (Joey makes a sarcastic laugh.)
Rachel: Ross, this is not how we wanted you to find out about this. You have every right to go nuts.
Rachel: What? What?!
Rachel: Oh!!
Ross: Now, hold on! Hold on! (Stops him) Look, look, your daughter and I are supposed to leave tonight for our honeymoon, now-now you-you tell her that Im gonna be at that airport and I hope that shell be there too! Oh yeah, I said Rachels name, but it didnt mean anything, Okay? Shes-shes just a friend and thats all! (Rachel sits down, depressed.) Thats all! Now just tell Emily that I love her and that I cant imagine spending my life with anyone else. Please, promise me that youll tell her that.
Rachel: No, you wait! This is ridiculous!
Chandler: Rachel, wait, wait.
Rachel: (holding the phone out to Chandler) Chandler? It's Alan, he wants to speak to you.
[Camera pans to the Geller family table. Ross, Rachel, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there.]
Rachel: Rome. Jerk missed his flight.
Rachel: No.
[Scene, A Restaurant, Rachel is on her date, drunk, and is leaving that answering machine message.]
Rachel: Shut up!
Joey: Yeah! All rightLook, I know sometimes itll be hard, okay? But, itll also be really really great. Please Rachel! I-I-I really want you to stay.
(Cut to later. Rachel is in tears)
RACHEL: Ohh, I'm gonna have to get over it. God, see I didn't know that's I had to do, I just have to get over it.
Rachel: Thats right Joey, the chair angel came in and heeled your chair. (She sits down in the chair.)
Rachel: Ohh were not sailing.
Rachel: Phoebe you cant have both of them! You have to pick one!
Rachel: Hi, I'm Rachel.
Rachel: Yes, my sister's giving us her place for the weekend.
Rachel: Chandler Bing? It's time to see your thing.
Rachel: All right, all right, all right. Last night, I had a dream that, uh, you and I, were...
Rachel: I thought it was Chandler!
Monica: Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (To Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
(Rachel goes up to the door of their bathroom)
Rachel: We're sorry.
RACHEL: That's not the end.
Rachel: I could not have done this without you.
Rachel: You were supposed to be in there so I could see your thing!
Ross: Hey Pheebs, could you please not put your feet up on my new (On Rachels glare) old sheet?
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel and Phoebe are looking at some photos and they're sitting next to the window.]
Rachel: Monica! I couldnt find him for two hours! He was having sex with Amy Welch!
Rachel: Wow.
Rachel: Kinda hurtin my hand though.
Rachel: Sorry. Paolo's catching an earlier flight.
Rachel: Oh, God, he's such a pig,
Rachel: Wait a minute! What are you gonna tell Joanna?
Rachel: What happened?
RACHEL: God, oh God Monica, I forgot. This is our first date.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is on the phone.]
Rachel: Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, it was really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, but um, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um, Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right.
Rachel: Do what, do what?
Rachel: Alright, c'mon! (Miserably) Let's play Twister!
Rachel: Well, you were pretty damn good.
RACHEL: I can't believe this is happening.
Rachel: Oh really? Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I taped it? (Joey smiles luridly) Oh forget it! (Ross enters.) Oh there he is now, the father of my child, the porn king of the west village.
(Cut to inside Central Perk where Rachel is helping Phoebe. Chandler and Monica enter.)
Rachel: (On the phone) Okay, he's a, he's a black capuchian monkey with a white face... (Enter Ross) ...with, with Russian dressing and, and pickles on the side. Okay. Thanks.
Rachel: Well, last night you seemed to know your way around the table.
Rachel: Or?
Rachel: Tommyyyy! Say, whats your favourite thing about summer?
Rachel: Yeah. Just to be sure I'm gonna call Dr. Wiener.
(Monica and Rachel look at Phoebe strangely.)
Rachel: "Indeed there isn't"... I should really get back to work.
Rachel: This is so awesome! College guys are so cute!
Rachel: Thats your whole name, okay of course it is! Okay, well lets-lets just have a look-see here. (Looking at his resume)
Rachel: Oh God, oh. Great, Monica, y'know what, you could've called, I have been up here, I've been worried...
Rachel: Okay now Joey, y'know that since you're returning all of this stuff right after the audition you're gonna have to wear underwear?
Rachel: (to Chandler) Well, there's a kiss that he won't forget for a couple of hours, y'know.
Rachel: Yeah, well, it's an important day. I wanna look nice. Um, has uh Dr. Franzblau been by?
Rachel: Yeah, it is amazing it lasted that long.
Rachel: Burning's good. Yeah, I got stuff to burn.
Rachel: Okay, let me just change.
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh, that is so hot. She walks around him to the other side)
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross is working on his laptop when Rachel enters with Emma.]
Rachel: Okay, okay, could we change the subject, please?
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
Rachel: Hey Mon, lets give Pete a chance Come on, he was funny, he seems really nice, and that check thing was adorable.
Rachel: Oh, my god.
Rachel: So, um, will you bring the truck?
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Get off.
Chandler: Hello Rachel.
Rachel: ... the WENUS?
(She goes to look out the window at Rosss apartment and sees Jill staring at her and closing the drapes with an evil look on her face. Rachel is stunned into silence.)
Rachel: I don't!
Rachel: Oh...see... but Joanne loved Chachi! That's the difference!
Rachel: The meeting with the guy went great?
Rachel: What are you going to make?
Rachel: Oh..Go..Oh..and I told my boss that someone made out with Ralph Lauren. If she finds out that I lied to her, she is going to hate me even more. Phoebe!!
Rachel: I know! It's like I'm being punished for not having this disgusting, poisoning habit!
Rachel: My God! What happened to you?
Rachel: (entering) Hey Ross! I brought reinforcements.
Rachel: Oh, I gotta get my ticket!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is holding a book as she, Rachel, and Monica drink some tea as Chandler looks on.]
Rachel: (hurt) Waitressing?
Rachel: But, but?
Rachel: I love how he cares so much about stuff. If I squint I can pretend hes Alan Alda.
Rachel: Okay, uh, you let me go grocery shopping, and I buy laundry detergent, but it's not the one with the easy-pour spout.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross are there, Rachel is serving brownies.]
(Rachel gets up and ushers them into the hall, as they pass Joshua, he leaps onto the counter to avoid them. Rachel drops them off in the hall, and knocks on Joeys door.)
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is closing up and Ross comes in. Get your Kleenex.]
Monica: Chandler, please dont think I was trying to pressure you. Phoebe and Rachel
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Rachel is in bed, Ross is fooling around, and Dr. Long is checking on Rachel.]
Rachel: Who was that?
Rachel: No.