words in movies
(She throws them into the kitchen and Rachel picks them up with the handle of a large spoon. Chandler and Monica have horrified looks on their faces.)
Rachel: All right! Who's are they? Who's are they?
(Rachel turns and stares at him.)
Rachel: Well, get 'em out of here! What's wrong with you?
Rachel: (waving them in his face) Take 'em! (Joey makes a noise and jumps out of the way.) Joey, you can touch them! They're your underwear.
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Rachel: Hey, Pheebs!
Rachel: What are you reading?
Rachel: Honey that sounds like fun.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Oh, I read that in high school.
[Scene: Phoebe's class, the class has already started and Rachel walks in late.]
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Sorry I'm late, but I left late.
Rachel: So Pheebs, what is the book about?
Rachel: Well yeah, but then I remembered I started it and there was this pep rally and I was, I was on top of the pyramid but anywayumm, what is this book about?
The Teacher: How would you characterize the theme of this book, uh let's see here (looks at his attendance sheet), Rachel Green?
Rachel: Umm, well I would have to say that it's a, it's tragic love story.
Rachel: Oh-oh-oh, symbolism! And uh, the-the uh, wildness of the mores, which I think is-is mirrored in the wildness of Heathcliff's character.
The Teacher: Excellent! What Rachel has shrewdly observed here
Phoebe: (To Rachel) You completely stole my answer!
Rachel: Well, honey that was pretty obvious.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Rachel: Be-because I didn't want him to think I was stupid! I mean, that was really embarrassing what happened to you!
Cynthia: Oh, candles! (Notices something.) What is that? A blanket? A video camera? Oh my God! (As she storms out, Rachel returns and overhears the conversation.)
Cynthia: I can't believe you thought that you were going to video tape us having sex on the first date! (She storms away and Rachel enters to confront Joey.)
Rachel: Joey, is what she just said ummOh my God. (Looks around the room.) You were actually gonna (Chandler picks this moment to return to the living room.) (Rachel stares in shock.)
Rachel: And with Chandler in the next room. What are you, what are you sick?
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's; continued from earlier. Joey is closing the door after Rachel leaves and is about to confront Chandler and Monica.]
Joey: Yeah, I like that. But no-no, how does that explain why Rachel found my underwear at your place?
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's class; Rachel walks in, on time this time.]
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: (sitting down) So umm, what's this book about?
Rachel: Well, I was gonna, but I accidentally read something else.
Rachel: Vogue! Hey, so tell me about this Jane Eyre woman.
Rachel: Come on Phoebe! Dont be such a goodie-goodie!
Rachel: A cyborg?! Isn't that like a robot?!
Phoebe: Umm, Rachel and I were just discussing it and she had some very interesting insights.
The Teacher: Well, go ahead Rachel.
Rachel: Uh, thank you Phoebe. Umm, well, what struck me most when reading Jane Eyre was uh, how the book was so ahead of its time.
Rachel: Yeah, well, feminism yes, but also the robots.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are returning from class.]
Rachel: (entering, angrily) Ugh, that was so embarrassing! I can't believe you let me go on and on like that!
Rachel: That was not funny!
Rachel: Phoebe, come on! What is the big deal? I thought this was going to be something we could do together! Y'know, I thought it would be fun!
Rachel: Ohh. Oh, so you really wanted to learn. Yeah, y'know, Pheebs I just wanted to have fun. Ohh, you know who you should go with?
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's; Joey returns carrying a bucket of chicken, and starts going through the mail. While doing this, Monica's picture falls out. He bends over to pick it up and gasps. While he's staring at the picture, Rachel decides to come over and sees him looking at the picture.]
Rachel: (sees the picture) Oh my God! That's Monica!!
Rachel: You get away from me!! You sick, sick, sick, sick-o!!
Rachel: Joey has got a secret peephole!
Rachel: Yes! He has a naked picture of Monica! He takes naked pictures of us! And then he eats chicken and looks at them!
Rachel: Look! (Shows Ross the picture.)
Rachel: Well, what is the truth?
Rachel: Monica, is this true?
Rachel: Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found your underwear in our apartment the other day?
Rachel: And the video camera?
Rachel: Oh honey, I'm so sorry, you were right, this feels great!
Rachel: Ohh, out, oh God, I don't know why we didn't think to check there!
Monica: (upon seeing Rachel she points) Oh.
Rachel: No, Monica! Monica! We have to fix this!
[Scene, Central Perk: Rachel, Ross and Monica are there]
Phoebe: Oh yeah, okay. I'm uptight. Yeah, that's why I don't want to watch a middle aged guy dance around in what I can only assume is a child halloween costume! (turns to look at Monica and Rachel who look like they feel very sorry for the stripper)
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Hey.
Phoebe: Rachel?
Phoebe: Uh-huh. You've met your match Rachel Green.
Rachel: Sure.
Rachel: Wh-what do you mean?
Rachel: Oh my God. Did you talk to him?
Rachel: Phoebe
Rachel: This one's from Joey... feels like a book. Thinks it's a book... feels like a book. And...(opens it)...it's a book!
Rachel: Ok, well this is like that...in no way. I had a...I had a dream last night that I wanted to kiss Joey.
Rachel: What? What!?! You kissed him?
Rachel: Ohh, okay, Im sorry. Youre right. Yknow what? We absolutely can stay married, because I was under the impression that the boxes were far away from each other. All right, look, just please, take a moment here and think about what youre asking of me.
Rachel: Yeah. Your teeth? Yes, I saw them from outside. (Sitting down on the couch.) You guys are never going to believe this. But, Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren.
Chandler: Yeah. (Rachel walks in.)
Rachel: Yeah! I dont think youre going to need it though. Okay, check this out. If its a girl, Rain.
[Scene: The hall, full of paleontologists. Rachel and Joey are walking around]
Rachel: Will you stop calling it your apartment!
Rachel: Well, okay, look. I don't know, listen, I don't know what's going on here but let's
Rachel: What?
Rachel: To get you to make out with him!!!
Ross: Gimmie! (Takes the ring and puts it in his coat pocket as Rachel enters the hallway.)
Rachel: Oh my God! You really are freakishly strong!
Rachel: Ross, honey, is there anything we can do?
Rachel: Ohh, well I'm not totally back yet, but thank you.
Rachel: Come on, this isnt funny. She thinks its my fault that you havent called her. You have to call her!
[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier. Rachel starts laughing.]
Kim: Hi Rachel.
Rachel: Ohh, hi, Kim.
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Oh no, no, no. Oh God, you think I made out with him.
Rachel: No, theres nothing to make up, shes gonna know that I have a key to her office, Ive got to get you locked up back the way you were! (She tries to drag him over to the chair, but Chandler stops her.)
Joey: Thats right! Cause Im a Tribbiani! (To Rachel) And this is what we do! I mean we may not be great thinkers or world leaders, we dont read a lot or run very fast, but damnit! We can eat!
Rachel: What the... DIAL IT DOWN! (Joey goes to sit on the bed) Listen, ok, and maybe they're crazy thoughts, but sometimes I do, I have, I've been thinking about... you know, us! (looks at Joey, who's totally distraught) Ok, dial it up a little!
Rachel: Monica and Chandler are really moving in here and I have to move out and everything is changing.
RACHEL: Yeah, who's gonna eat all our food, and tie up our phone lines, and - is that my bra? What the hell you doin' with my bra?
Rachel: You-you're not wearing a jacket.
Rachel: No, it was a stupid bet! We were just playing a game!
Rachel: Well, y'know, a little of this, a little of that. Got myself a date tomorrow night.
Rachel: You were with Kenny today, werent you?
Rachel: (entering) Hey roomie!
Rachel: Okay, two things didnt happen. Remember I told you that someone made out with Ralph Lauren in the copy room? Well, it turns out thats not true.
Rachel: That wouldnt help me.
Rachel: Ohh, Phoebe, what am I going to do?
Emily: Oh, no-no, yknow I absolutely adore Rachel its just that, well it might be a awkward for you. But its absolutely your decision. (Gets up.) More tea?
Rachel: (softly) Oh my God.
Rachel: Kim, hi.
Rachel: You and Ralph?
(He goes into his room and closes the door. Rachel goes to pick it up and )
Rachel: No-no, Im staying put.
Rachel: But honey, I think shes moving in with Chandler.
Chandler: (entering, sees Rachels throw) Ni-hi-ice!
Rachel: No-no-no, no, honey please, Ive got, Ive just have so much to deal with.
Joey: (to Monica and Rachel) He's talking to London!
Rachel: Oh my God, I cannot believe this. You know I actually came in here hoping to have a mature conversation with youAbout us! But I can�t do that with someone who hides my messages and brings crazy women back to my apartment!
Rachel: But your divorce isn't even final yet.
Rachel: (worried) Nothing?
Rachel: You're right, you're right. I should just tell her the truth.
Rachel: Okay then! (She starts rummaging through the trash to find Kim's lighter.)
Rachel: Her dancer friends?
Rachel: (looking at the bill) Uhh, we still need a tip.
Rachel: Really?!
Rachel: Well and clearly not a minute sooner.
(They turn back around to see the baby Monica's carrying, but then they realise what the surprise is. Ross, Mike, Phoebe and Rachel gasp and stare at Chandler and his baby. Joey hasn't figured it out yet.)
[Ross and Rachel are in Rachel's bedroom]
Rachel: Well, first of all, Paulo and I are not back together. It was just a stupid thing I did, and if I could go back in time and do it again, well, I wouldn't. Um, second of all (Ross is laughing), what?
Monica: Hey, have you seen Rachel?
[Cut to the casino, a very drunk and doodled on Rachel is walking arm in arm with an equally drunk and doodled on Ross are walking through the casino and greeting people on their way through. Ross has some whiskers and his nose colored in, along with his name on his forehead.]
(Monica goes into Rachels room.)
Rachel: I loved the moment when you first saw the giant dog shadow all over the park.
[Rachel leaves]
Rachel: Op! Youre peeping!
Rachel: No!
Phoebe: Rachel?
Rachel: Yeah?
[Rachel enters]
[Phoebe walks over to talk to Rachel.]
Rachel: Well, I told him I would think about it, but Im gonna tell him no.
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, Monica, I'm really happy you got promoted, but cold cucumber mush for thirty-something bucks? No! Rachel just had that, that, that salad, and, and Joey with his like teeny pizza! It's just...
Rachel: (seeing his new table) Ohh! Oh my God!
Rachel: Really! God Ross, what were you thinking? (To Phoebe, quietly) I know its really shallow, but a part of me wants him again.
Rachel: I a not gonna lie to you, I'm pretty sick
Rachel: Now that youre on youre own, youre free to look as stupid as you like.
Rachel: Oh... sit down, sit down. Oh, honey, you know, I once also almost married somebody that I didn’t love. Do you remember Barry?
Rachel: No-no, they just had a big blowout over what to do with my room.
Dr. Franzblau: It really was. There was this great little pastry shop right by my hotel. (Carol sits up in pain, Rachel and Dr. Franzblau casually lay her back down) There you go, dear.
[Monica and Chandler make What was that? gestures. Joey and Ross go into Rachels old room.]
Rachel: Okay...
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Oh no. No Ross, dont do this.
Rachel: Yeah honey you dont believe her do you?
Joey: Okay, look, I think we have to tell Rachel she messed up her dessert.
[Ross and Rachel re-enter.]
Rachel: It sure is.
Rachel: Well?