words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is reading What to Expect When Youre Expecting as Rachel enters from her bedroom.]
Rachel: (looking at her fingers) Oh my God! Let me see that! (Grabs the book from him.)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Oh Pheebs thats so sweet(Grabs a pair of pants)Ooh, those are so cute!
Monica: (entering) Oh good youre all here. Thanksgiving tomorrow, four oclock. (To Rachel) Oh, guess who I invited. Remember that guy Will Colbert from high school?
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Wow! I dont remember him. Honey, are you sure youre not talking about your imaginary boyfriend.
Rachel: Oh thats nice.
Monica: All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet, Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion to poultry.
Rachel: Remember I had to leave the room the other day when you had that roast chicken?
Joey: Thats right! Cause Im a Tribbiani! (To Rachel) And this is what we do! I mean we may not be great thinkers or world leaders, we dont read a lot or run very fast, but damnit! We can eat!
Monica: Hey, isnt weird to think about how next year at this time theyll be a little baby at the table? (Chandler turns around in horror.) (Seeing him) Rachels! But good to know where youre at!
Monica: Good. And Rachel Green too. (Will stops suddenly.)
Rachel: (entering, carrying a baking dish) Hi!
Will: (glaring at Rachel) Rachel Green.
Will: Look at her standing there with those yams! My two greatest enemies Ross: Rachel Green and complex carbohydrates.
Rachel: (sees Will) Oh my God Monica, who is that?
Rachel: Oh! I do not remember him! Wow! He's really got that sexy, smoldering thing going on. (We see Will angrily staring at Rachel.) Oh my God, hes Look at the way hes just staring at me. I think hes trying to mouth something to me, but I cant make it out. (Will mouths, "I hate you.")
(They sit down at the table and Will goes to talk to Rachel.)
Rachel: Hi! Will, right?
Rachel: Hi! Im Rachel Green.
Rachel: Really?! Arent you sweet! I gotta tell you though, I am, I am having the hardest time placing you. Oh-oh hang on! Did we umm, did we fool around at Lance Davis graduation party?
Rachel: Thank you!
Monica: (breaking it up) Uh Rachel? Rachel, why dont you sit here? (Next to Joey) And Will you sit way over there. (The other side of the table.)
Joey: (To Rachel) Its like me when I was born.
Rachel: All right, who would uh, like some yams? Will?
Rachel: What? (Joey starts offering Ross some turkey.) Oh yknow what? Can we please keep the chicken and the turkey and everything on the other side of the table? The smell is just yuck!
Rachel: Im sorry. What?
Will: I said it was typical. Typical of you, Rachel Green, Queen Rachel does whatever she wants in little Rachel land. (Does a fake hair flip.)
Rachel: Umm, Im sorry. Do you-do you have a problem with me?
Monica: (To Rachel) Apparently you were umm, a little mean to him in high school.
Rachel: Im-ImI had no idea. Im sorry. I
Rachel: Uh Will umm, I just want to say that Im real sorry for whatever I-I did to you in high school
Rachel: You had a club?!
Will: Thats right, The I Hate Rachel Green Club!
Rachel: Whoa! My God! So what, you all just joined together to hate me?! Who else was in this club?
Rachel: (To Ross) So you were in an I Hate Rachel club?
Rachel: So who else was in this club?
Rachel: So Ross, we went out for two years, and you never told me you were in an I Hate Rachel club.
Rachel: Okay Monica, did you know about this?!
Ross: co-founded. Co-founded the club was because I was insanely in love with you. Obviously I didnt handle it very well. But if you think about it the I Hate Rachel Club was really the I Love Rachel Club.
Will: Uh, except that it was really the I Hate Rachel Club.
Rachel: Okay. So what? You guys would just like get together and like just say mean things about me?
Rachel: What rumor?
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: (shocked) Oh my God!
Rachel: What?! You heard that?! (Goes and stands behind Joey.)
Rachel: Oh no!!!! Oh my God!! This is all making so much sense to me now! This is why Adam Carter wouldnt go out with me! This is why Billy Tratt would just stay in this region! (Motions to her breasts.) (Joey has turned around.)
Rachel: Monica, how come you never told me this?!
(Joey is now looking at Rachel, and since Rachels standing and hes sitting down and hes not looking at her face You get the picture.)
Rachel: Joey stop staring! Theres nothing there! Its not true!
Rachel: Oh! (Hits him and storms out.)
Rachel: (entering carrying a book) Okay! Okay! Listen to what Sean McMahon wrote in my yearbook senior year, "Dear Rach, youre such a good person." Not girl! Person!
Rachel: (reading what he wrote again) "Dear Rach, youre a great person. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." (Will laughs.)
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was half and half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school.
Rachel: What?
Ross: (shocked) (To Rachel) How did you know that?!!!!
Rachel: Yes it is! I saw you guys going at it behind the card catalog!
Rachel: Ohh, theres a picture of her in the yearbook actually.
Ross: Only when it was damp!! (To Rachel) I cant believe you-you told people about this?! Everybody knew?! Yknow what? (To Will) Im back in the club!
Rachel: WhPhoebe!!
Rachel: All right, yknowFine! You guys have your stupid little club, but I would just like to say is what you did to me is way worse than what I did to you! You gave me a tiney-wienie! (Will laughs.)
Monica: All right, listen youre just being silly. Rachel, even with that rumor you were one of the most popular girls in school and everyone wanted to be like you. One girl wanted to be like you so much she stuffed her pants with a Tootsie Roll!
Rachel: Wow
Monica: And Ross, if it werent for Rachels rumor I mean no one in high school would even know who you were. She put you on the map!
Rachel: Shes right.
Rachel: You can keep those pants by the way.
Ross: (sees how strangely Monica, Chandler and Rachel are looking at him) What?
Rachel: (shouting) Babies don't care if they're slim.
Rachel: (looks at Ross and then at Amy again in disbelief) What?
(Rachel and Amy enter)
Rachel: Excuse me?
Rachel: Hips or thighs?
Rachel: (doesn't believe what she's hearing) Seriously?
Rachel: (yelling) Joey, where are those bags?
Joey: Get back in there! (Rachel re-enters her room and closes the door.)
Rachel: Did you just say Emma?
Rachel: Are you kidding?! With the, with the lilies, and-and the song, and the stars! It was really wonderful! Did you just make that up?
Rachel: (To the woman sitting in front of her) He-he said Rachel, right? Do you think I should go up there?
Rachel: That's shocking!
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: My God!
Phoebe: Thank you! (to Rachel) Oh, and I have something for you!
[Cut to Joannas outer office, where Rachel and Sophie work. They are both coming back from lunch.]
Joey: Hey! Rachel: Congratulations! Wow!!
Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: Hey, that was an honest mistake!
Rachel: Mmh-mmh!
Joey: Hey! You hold on pal! Now you made my friend, Rachel, cry. So now, youre gonna go up there and apologize to her, unless you want me to call the landlord.
The Salesman: Ohh, okay. (Laughs.) Something didn't quite add up there. (Ross stops, walks back to talk to the salesman, and in the process pushes Rachel up against a wall.)
[The next flashback is from The One With The Dozen Lasagnas, Phoebe is telling everyone but Rachel about the pass Paulo made on her.]
Rachel: Did I say I was done guessing? Okay, thank you for that. Oh wow! Whats this?
Joey: You mean how they're friends and nothing more? (Glares at Rachel.)
Rachel: Hi!
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel, Joey and Emma are there.]
Rachel: No! It didnt! Thats what I want to talk to you about. (starts to break up) Now, just to brief you (starts to cry) I may cry, but they are not tears of sadness or of anger, but just of me having this discussion with you.
Chandler (to Rachel): What am I gonna do now?
[Scene: Shop, Phoebe and Rachel are talking in front of the dressing room]
Rachel: But I don't want you to.
Rachel: Who's Gladys?
Rachel: Aaah... Ross, actually there's something that I really need to talk to you about.
Rachel: Did you watch the tape?
Rachel: Ok, good-bye you guys. Thanks for everything. (she starts to leave, and hits everyone with her skis) Oh, sorry! Oh, sorry!
Monica: Rachel! Im never gonna think its okay for you to cheat on your husband!
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont (Joeys boat), shes shown to be in one of the waterways around New York, but in reality shes in a sound stage on the Warner Bros. lot and we see New York from the water in some rather poor green screen shots. Rachel and Joey are on board.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Chandler and Rachel are talking.]
Rachel: Hey Pheebs, I'm-I'm taking Charlie shopping, why don't you come and I'll help you find something.
Rachel: Well, this is going well. (Chandler looks worried)
Rachel: Well, actually Gunther sent me. Youre not allowed to have cups out here, its a thing. (takes her cup and goes back inside)
Rachel: Joey, what... is... this...thing... doing here?
Rachel: Well, why I told him it's haunted. Two can play at this game. (gives Gladys to Monica)
Rachel: Joey, we're not keeping this!
Rachel: Oh, it's a gift certificate to this new SPA in SOHO.
Rachel: Yeah, sure... (looks outside into the corridor if Joey is there)
Rachel: She's yours!
Rachel: She's yours!
Rachel: She's mine!
Rachel: Yes I can! (pushes her back again)
Rachel: She's mine!
Rachel: Now, now the one in the feather boa, that's Dr. Francis. Now, she used to be a man. Okay, now look, see, there's Raven. We hate her. We're glad she's dying. Okay- (Marcel pushes down a cushion to reveal a shoe) Wh- wh- Marcel, are you playing with Monica's shoes? You know you're not supposed to pl- whoah. Marcel, did you poo in the shoe? (Takes the shoe into the kitchen) Marcel, bad monkey! Oh! Oh! (She notices the newsletter and taps the contents of the shoes onto it, then folds it shut) Sorry, Barry. Little engagement gift. I'm sure you didn't register for that. (She leaves the apartment holding the newsletter at arm's length. However, she leaves the door open. Marcel runs out in the opposite direction. There is a shot from the TV and Rachel runs back in) Who died? Who died? Roll him over! Oh, c'mon, roll him over! Oh...! Well, we know it wasn't Dexter, right Marcel? Because- (Looks down and notices he is missing) Marcel? Marc- (Notices the open door)
Rachel: She's mine!
Rachel: I want Gladys!
Rachel: Excellent!
Rachel: She's mine!
Rachel: Not Joey, no, I was just lusting after Chandler.
Rachel: You pierced her ears? How could you do this without telling me?
Phoebe: Okay. Rachel, the hottest babies in the Tri-State Area are in this room right now! I overheard one of the judges say that not one of them holds a candle to Emma!
Rachel: Oh, don't be such a baby!
Rachel: (laughs) Oh, I'm sure gonna miss pretending to laugh at your weird jokes that I don't get.
(He turns to face Rachel on one knee with the box open.)
[Scene: The hallway between the apartments, Monica is lugging one of those floor polishing machines through the hallway. Rachel comes up the steps and stops when she sees Monica.]
Joey: (realizes what he said) Street noise drowned any of that out? (Rachel moves madly towards him) No, all right, I see you later, okay... (Turns away embarrassed)
Sandy: Like in my last job, I met Daniel when he was three weeks old. And I got to watch him grow into this awesome person... When I left, I said: I'll see you soon... And he said to me: Skdandy... (Ross and Rachel look puzzled) That was his name for me... I'll see you every day... right in... (points at his heart, but starts to cry before he can finish his sentence. Rachel tries to comfort him, but Ross has this "you've got to be kidding me" look all over him)
Rachel: Well, I was going to, but then I figured, you know... you're food is so delicious and perfect, you can never have too many of those pumpkin things.
Rachel: Well, I like the pretty little drawing of you in the wedding dress.
Rachel: So, uhm... what are you gonna do today?
Rachel: Oh my God, what!?
Rachel: Absolutely.
Rachel: Hi! Emma will be up in a minute!
Phoebe: .and I said Vicrum you can't just call every time you get lonely you know, you, you gave up that right when you slept with Rachel.
Rachel: Ok, look, Ross. I do not want Emma going to the playground.
Rachel: Ross, those things go like 40 miles an hour! Ok? When you're... and there is that moment when you are at the top, when you just don't know if you're gonna return back to earth!
Rachel: All right!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, another time lapse, Monica is seeking advice from Rachel and Phoebe about possible replacement earrings.]
Rachel: That was one time, Ross, and they were only like 5 milligrams.
Rachel: Well, I did my best to convince him that Im not some crazy girl who is dying to get marriedIm just going through a hard time.
RACHEL: What, so you go over there, you tell him you think he's cute, what's the worst that could happen?
Rachel: Ok.
Rachel: Ok.
Rachel: Ok, careful.
Rachel: Careful, watch her hair. WATCH HER HAIR!
Rachel: You gave her a key to your apartment?!
(Rachel stands up and kisses Ross. He is stunned. A moment of silence follows.)
Janice: (entering and singing) Monica and Rachel had syrup, now I can get my man to cheer up. (laughs hysterically) Good morning Joey.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is there except for Rachel and Ross, who both come storming in. Rachel is still going off about Rosss secret marriage.]
Rachel: Oh, oh Ross, oh my God, are you okay?
Rachel: Well when I talk to her I almost feel like she understands what I'm saying.
Ross and Rachel: Hmmmm .
Rachel: (breaking up) Were just really very excited about this charity event that we have to go to.
Rachel: Alright fine. I'll do it.
Rachel: IF you hold a spider.
Rachel: and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?
Rachel: And umm, vintage handkerchiefs yknow cause, people cry at weddings. (Starting to cry.) Im just gonna grab a couple of these.
Rachel: (after a pause) Phoebe, Shania Twain is still alive!
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: ROSS!
Rachel: whoo... ok... wow... ok... OH!