words in movies
Chandler: Well the vet seems to think thats shes becoming a rooster. (The rooster crows.) Were getting a second opinion.
Ross: Now, how will they know if youre ready?
Phoebe: Oh, theyre just gonna umm, look to see if my endometria layer is thick.
Ross: (He does so, and finds a half-eaten box of cookies.) Youre good. (Tries a cookie.) These are not.
Ross: Yes. Yes. Yes. (Theyre perfect so far.)
Chandler: I got it! Scotch tape. (Theyre right.)
Alice: Umm, it costs $16,000 each time you do this. So, umm, were kinda using all the money we have to do it just this one time.
Ross: Gentlemen, youre pick.
Monica: I knew that! Rachel! Use youre head!
Phoebe: Hello, tiny embryos. Well, Im-Im Phoebe Buffay, hi! Im-Im-Im hoping to be your uterus for the next nine months. You should know, that were doing this for Frank and Alice, who you know, youve been there! Umm, yknow they want you so much, so when you guys get in there, really grab on. Okay, and-and I promise that Ill keep you safe and warm until youre ready to have them take you home, so Oh! And also, umm next time you see me, Im screaming, dont worry, thats whats supposed to happen.
Chandler: I majored in lightning rounds. All right, were gonna destroy you.
Monica: Youre doing it again.
Ross: All right, gentlemen, youre up first.
Ross: 11, unbelievable 11 is correct. (The guys celebrate.) All right, thats 4 for the guys. Ladies, youre up.
Phoebe: Umm, yeah, uh-huh, theyre implanted.
Rachel: (entering from Chandlers bedroom, I guess, and sees the foosball table.) Oh my God! I cant believe you guys are actually think youre moving in here!
Phoebe: You guys! You guys! Youre gonna have a baby! Theyre gonna have a baby!
Monica: I cant believe were living here!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, theyre both unpacked. The big ceramic dog has found a new home in front of the window. Joey screams and runs into the living room.]
Monica: Youre getting a crush on your sisters fianc�e.
The Vendor: (looks around) Theyre all tourists.
Rachel: No! Joey, oh youre so sweet. Youre so-so sweet, honey. But Im not, Im not looking for a husband.
Amy: We’re gonna be roomies! (she snaps her finger and points at Joey, snaps her fingers again and points to the bags) Come on!
Joey: Come on, you guys are more then that! I mean, youre gonna get together right?
Mark: Ive kinda of had this ah, this crush on you. (Rachel is shocked) But since you were with Ross, I-I didnt do anything about it. But, now that youre not, Id really like to ask you out sometime. So-so thats-thats what Im doing, now.
Chandler: Hey, relax I just need more time. Were going to dinner tonight.
Phoebe: Nuh-uh! Theyre maternity pants. They even came with a list of baby names. (Pulls out a sheet of paper which lists whos been naughty and whos been nice.) See, these names are good, and these names are bad. (Finally, she figures it out.) Ohh.
Ross: I mean youre not gonna give me a-a ticket for driving too slow are ya?
Ross: Well then well-well see you the day after tomorrow. (Walks away slowly, but notices something.) Mom?! Dad?! (Theyre sitting by the window.) What-what what you guys doing here?!
The Fan: I have no idea what youre talking about. But I, but I just got Phoebe Buffays autograph!
Monica: I know youre planning my surprise bridal shower.
Joey: Listen also were uh, were watching the game here Saturday night, if people want to come over.
Rachel: Oh, you’re not gonna believe what happened to me today! Ralph Lauren called, and gave me my job back!
Rachel: You think youre gonna get out of this on a technicality?
The Salesman: Actually, Im not buying. Im selling. Let me ask you one question. Do your friends ever have a conversation and you just nod along even though youre not really sure what theyre talking about?
Joey: Well, were fashioning a very long poking device.
Joey: Uh Rach, if youre gonna start another story, at least let me finish mine.
Mona: And the antennae Oh my God youre Spudnik!
Joey: All right, youre probably not gonna want to hear this but ah, if it was me, and this is just me, (Chandler gets ready to throw another dart) I would ah, I would bow out.
Joey: What theyre not invited?! Oh no, thats terrible! Theyre gonna be crushed!
Chandler: I think its great. Its great. Yknow, theyre thinking of changing the name of this place.
Joey: (to the dog) Cmere. Hey. Cmere. Thats Rachel. Shes the one who used to live here. Might as well be honest with youwe love her. But we cant have her. I really miss her. Well, hey, you understand, right? Youre a guy. (thinks about it and picks up the dog and looks) Well, you used to be.
Monica: (standing outside) Cute PJs! Youre really livin it up here in London huh?
[Later, Phoebe is on the phone, theyre all still trapped in Monicas bedroom.]
Ross: You know what, its, its better this way anyway. I mean I dont know what I was thinking, going down that road again with us. Its just much easier if were just friends who have a kid.
Parker: Were driving!?
Monica: Wow. Yknow it is so weird. I mean, youre gonna tell this guy today and he has no idea whats gonna happen.
Monica: Oh sure, now you�re Mister Sensitivity. But when you wanted to have sex right after my uncle�s funeral
Monica: And people will think you own a Porsche because youre wearing the clothes?
Rachel: Oh thats right. Youre the talker. (They both reflect on that briefly) Anyway uh, great idea! Umm, I gotta go to the store; I told him that I would buy him some more tissues.
Monica: Did you not hear where my head was? Come on! Come on were a team! Were in this together!
Ross: What? Come on Rach, tell me what youre thinking?
Joey: I thought I did! Oh hey guess what? The premiere is next week and youre all invited! (They all gasp.)
Chandler: (handing Monica the wax) Wax the door shut, were never leaving, ever.
Monica: Oh my God. Youre even dumber than I am!
Chandler: Yes, but I feel like Ive really gotten in touch with my feminine side enough today. You know. In fact I think were two sachets away from becoming a lesbian couple.
Phoebe: Theyre gonna get through this, arent they?
Chandler: Oh. Oh right! Right! Because youre still seeing him and uh, hes a good guy. I mean, I remember a time when (He fakes falling asleep.)
Phoebe: Well look, you dont really like the one from uptown and youre too exhausted from dating the one up in Poughkeepsie, so I say you just end them both. Okay? You take a train up to Poughkeepsie and break up with her, and on your way back you break up with uptown. And then by the time you get home tonight, youre done!
Joey: Hey, did you get to the part where theyre trapped in the car and Cujos throwin himself at the windshield?
Rachel: (reading what he wrote again) "Dear Rach, youre a great person. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." (Will laughs.)
Rachel: Oh, its so easy for you I mean, youre not married, you get to have sex with who ever you want!
Rachel: Wh So If neither of you are married by the time youre 40, youre gonna marry Joey.
Rachel: Oh but Phoebe, were gonna be late for the movie.
Phoebe: (To Joey) You ate meat! (Joey is shocked) (To Chandler and Monica) You had sex! (Theyre shocked.)
Monica: Yknow, I dont have an appointment, but I sure could use a physical. (He laughs halfheartedly) Are you sure youre okay?
Chandler: Hey, look, youre in trouble either way! Okay? If she comes back and sees me locked to this instead of the chair, shes gonna know you were in here. So you might as well just let me go.
Joey: No! No! No! Its different for you. Youre so strong and together. Youre not some dumb kid who doesnt know what shes doing.
Rachel: Well, yeah, right, yknow what? Yeah, youre right, I mean, we no, we have our fun. Yeah! But if (Grunts uncomprehensively) I mean, I mean like craaaazy! Yknow? Okay, all right. This is gonna, this is gonna sound yknow, a little umm, hasty, but uh, just go with it. Umm. Ugh. What if we got married?
Rachel: Oh, well, that shouldnt be so hard, now that youre dating. (Imitating men at their worst) "Sweetheart, youre fired, but how bout a quickie before I go to work?"
Monica: Dad, please dont pick your teeth out here! Alright, and if youre gonna put your feet up, why dont you sit on the-
Monica: Are you trying to tell me that were moving to Oklahoma, or that youre gay? All right, not that this matters, but did they at least offer you a huge raise?
Joey: Oh really? Well, maybe you and I go out for drinks? (Pause) Youre the other one right? (She thinks about it for a second and nods yes.)
The Director: (approaching) Okay! Were about an hour away from getting the scene lit. So uh, if you guys dont mind, can we run it a couple of times?
Whitney: Were so sorry. (They get up to leave.)
Joey: Yeah, were gonna be fine! Get out!
Joey: Oh, youre Phoebes fan!
Pete: (turns off the TV) Youre taking this all wrong. Because, if I didnt leave you that tip, you wouldnt of come down here, we wouldnt be having this argument, and there wouldnt be this ah, heat between us.
Joey: Chandler, look theyre actors. Theyre there to do a job, just cause they work together, doesnt mean theyre gonna get together. I mean just cause it happened with Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins, it doesnt mean its gonna happen with them.
Ross: You damn kids! You ring my bell one more time, I swear to (Opens the door to find Jill standing there.) Ohh, uh Jill. Umm, that-thats just a little game I play with the kids down the hall. Umm, theyve really taken a liking to me. (Quickly looks out to see if theyre watching.) Uhh whats-whats-whats the matter?
Friend No. 2: Youre so bad!
Phoebe: (to Monica, whos entering) Hey, youre early.
Nurse: Yes, I see that here. Unfortunately we cant guarantee a private room and currently theyre all unavailable.
Ross: Yeah, he-hes right, hes right. This is your time y'know, yeah, youre young, youre-youre weird, chicks dig that.
Monica: And yet, were still poking him.
Chandler: Youre building a post office?
Joey: Whoa, ah!! Were you just gonna give me some lemonade?
Joey: Pretty cool, huh? But if youre thinking you can put a fish in there and it wouldnt get sucked up into the mechanism, well youd be wrong.
Mr. Kaplan: (opening the closet door revealing that its full of tangled up hangers.) I need these hangers separated ASAP. (she is stunned) Youre welcome.
Monica: (embarrassed) (To Phoebe and Rachel) I didnt even tell him to say that. (They hug). All right youre off my list.
Monica: No were not.
Chandler: Yeah, well, youre wrong! Okay, youre wrong.
Chandler: Look you have to realize I dont think of you as a thin, beautiful woman. (Monica glares at him.) See this is one of things that I can apologize for later! Look, what I mean is youre Monica! Okay? And I am in love with Monica.
Monica: (to Ben) Whos so brave, youre so brave, yes you are, youre so brave.
Rachel: I hope its still funny when youre in hell.
Ross: All right, were gonna play.
Rachel: You dont pick me! Youre stuck with me!
Ross: Fine, fine, Rachel your with Monica, Joey youre with me.
Director: Heres whats gonna happen. The musics gonna start, youre gonna dance, were gonna tape, you dont look at the camera. Any questions?
Phoebe: I know no, no, y'know you dont deserve this, you dont Ross. Youre, youre really, youre so good. (kisses him on the cheek)
Phoebe: I know! You see it is stuff like this which is why (Looking down) youre burning in hell!!
Monica: Were sorry honey.
Chandler: Wait a minute, hold the phone! Youre not Elizabeths dad?!
Chandler: Hey, yknow what, if youre gonna do that, if youre gonna name him Joey, you should name him Chandler. (Phoebe doesnt think so.) Oh, come on! Chandlers funny, sophisticated, and hes very loveable, once you get to know him.
Chandler: Eh, theyre both good. I generally just go with, Monicas drunk again. (Monica glares at him.)
Joey: Because! Cause Cause youre my baby sister!
Ross: So, you’re saying, uh, if I wear these pants I might be getting into hers?
Chandler: (to Joey) Does this mean were gonna have to start paying for coffee? (Joey shrugs his shoulders.)
Joey: I cant hear a word youre saying, my ears are ringing so bad.
Joey: Youre smoking again?!
Phoebe: (rushing in) Okay. If youre alive you answer your phone!
Supervisor: Theyre always going to tell you they dont need toner, but thats okay because whatever they say, you can find the answer to it here in this script.
Rachel: Chandler! Youre smoking? What are you doing?!
Girl: Im not gonna tell you! Youre the bad man who broke Sarahs leg.
Rachel: No Ross!! (stands up and moves away from him) Dont! You cant just kiss me and think youre gonna make it all go away, okay? It doesnt work that way. It doesnt just make it better. Okay?
Erica: We’re great, I think I may have asked all my questions.
Phoebe: Monica, if you get five cool points, you get to make somebody take off one item of clothing. It hasnt happened yet, but were all very excited.
Ross: When you put a D at the end of Fine youre not fine.
{Transcibers note: Ill finish that one for those of you who dont know what theyre talking about. Where the towels are Hers and Hers and His, Threes Company too! Yeah, thats the theme song for Threes Company.}