words in movies
Monica: Oh my God, Richard. (Yep, Richards back.)
Chandler: What?! Im Chandler! (She nods towards the doorway, Chandler turns and looks) Oh, thats Richard!
Monica: Oh God, maybe he wont see us. Richard!
Richard: (approaching them with a woman in tow) Monica! Chandler!
Richard: You too, you let uh, your hair grow long.
Richard: Well, my nose got lonely.
Chandler: (to Richards date) And uh, you dont have a mustache which is good. (She just smiles.) Im Chandler; I make jokes when Im uncomfortable.
Richards Date: Hi, Im Lisa.
Richard: Oh, Im sorry. (Introduces them.) Lisa, (nodding at each) Monica, Chandler. We used to date.
Chandler: Richard! No one supposed to know about us! (Richard just smiles at him.) See I, did it again.
Monica: (to Richard) Its good to see you
Matire'd: (to Richard) Youre tables ready sir.
Richard: Oh. Good to see you guys.
Richard: That might be fun. (Richard and Lisa sit down.)
[Scene: The Restaurant, Monica and Chandlers and Richard and Lisas tables have been pushed together and theyre all eating and talking.]
Richard: And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
Richard: Its so great seeing you guys again. Id like to make a toast. (Everyone raises their glasses) Uh, as a poet once said, "In the sweetness of friendship, let there be laughter and sharing of pleasures for in the due of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed."
Chandler: Richard!
Ross: What? (Excited) A-ohh! (Realizes) Ohh. Oh thats right thats right. Thats Richards favorite place too.
Chandler: Richard was there so I couldnt do it!
Richard: Hi!
Monica: Richard!
Richard: Actually, Im not here to complement the chef.
Richard: Well, it was great seeing you the other night.
Richard: No! I came here to tell you something else. (Pause) I came here (Pause) to tell you I still love you.
Richard: I still love you. And I know I probably shouldnt even be here telling you this, I mean youre with Chandler a guy I really like, and if you say hes straight Ill believe you! After seeing ya the other night I knew if I didnt tell ya Id regret it for the rest of my life. Letting you go was the stupidest thing I ever did.
Richard: Well yeah, Im sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrong place but I had to tell ya! I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you. I wanna have kids with you.
Richard: I know this is crazy but am I too late?
Richard: Well I know I was an idiot! And I tried to forget you, I really did! Yknow after we had lunch last year I spent six months in Africa trying to get you out of my head!
Richard: Working with blind kids.
Richard: Okay thats fine, Ill walk away. And Ill never bother you again, but only if you tell me Chandlers willing to give you everything I am.
Richard: You are?
Richard: Why?
Monica: Yeah! Richard!
Joey: Richard told Monica he wants to marry her!
[Scene: Richards Apartment, hes smoking a cigar and reading a book as there is a knock on the door. He gets up and opens the door to reveal ]
Richard: Hi.
Richard: I didnt ask. You wanna come in?
Richard: Oh, okay. Well, Ill just leave the door open and go sit on the couch. (Does so.)
Richard: (standing up quickly) Drink?
Richard: on the rocks with a twist? I remember. (Goes to make her drink.)
Richard: Uh, no! No! Thats art! If it bothers you I can put my art out.
Richard: So Monica let me ask you a question. Yknow, since we broke up do you ever, think about me?
Richard: Oh really?
Richard: Who is it?
Richard: Yeah hes no good. Do you ever (pause) think about me in a (pause) non-eye doctor way?
Richard: Ahh.
(Richard mouths, "Wow!")
[Scene: Richards Apartment, Monica is looking around and notices an African mask hanging on the wall.]
Richard: Excuse me?
Richard: Oh. (Laughs.) Whew!
Richard: Yeah! Youre saying, you need to be with someone more mature. Maybe someone with, a license to practice medicine. Or a mustache.
Richard: I think thats fair.
Richard: Its okay! Shh! Hey. Hey. (Hugs her) Shhhh.
Richard: I know. (Backs away.)
Richard: Yeah, I understand. Take as much time as you want. (Pause) Ten, even twenty minutes if you need it. Ill be here. Not smoking. (Monica leaves.)
[Scene: Richards Apartment, time lapse. Richard is smoking as he hears a knock on the door. He quickly puts out his cigar and opens the door.]
Richard: Chandler.
Richard: Shes not here and please come in.
Richard: Okay, she was here, but she left.
Richard: Well she said she had to think things over.
Richard: Oh, hey look nothing happened.
Richard: Well all right, one thing happened?
Richard: Well Im sorry.
Richard: Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
Richard: Well if it helps, it worked very well.
Richard: You were gonna propose? (Sits on the arm of the couch.)
Richard: No I dont have a ring! (Pause) You go get her Chandler. (Pause) And can I give you a piece of advice? If you do get her, dont let her go. Trust me.
Chandler: Yknow Richard you are a good guy.
Richard: I know. (Pause) I hate that!
(Chandler gets up and runs out, but as soon as the door closes behind him he opens it, runs back in, picks up his ring Richard is holding up for him, and runs back out.)
Monica: I'm going into business people. I'm sick and tired of being depressed about Richard. I needed a plan, a plan to get over my man. What's the opposite of man? Jam. (sees Joey trying some jam from the pot) Oh Joey don't! It's way to hot. (Joey realizes this and spits what he had in his mouth back into the pot.)
RICHARD: Ok, I have to sleep on the west side because I grew up in California and otherwise the ocean would be on the wrong side.
RICHARD: Then, you're redoing it because...
Richard: Ill just throw them out.
RICHARD: But... he gets it back, pass to the middle, lines it up and... BAM! Yes! Could that shot BE any prettier?
Monica: (on machine) "Hi, uh, Richard it's Monica, um, listen I did something kind of crazy tonight, um, maybe I'm getting my period or something, I don't know." Nooo!!
Richard: The picture of my wife! In your pack!
JOEY: Ok, uh, hey Richard, if you had an extra ticket to the Knicks game and you had to choose between a friend who smells and one who bruises you who would you pick?
Richard: Absolutely, this will just be something we do, like racquetball.
Paul: And in fifth grade I got into a fight. Well, it wasnt really a fight. Richard Darinvel bit me on the nose and, and I feel down. I still have a little scare right here (points to it) you can see it.
RICHARD: Hey come on, you haven't heard my reason yet.
Richard: Im wearing two belts.
Richard: Oh, thank you. Youre welcome. (He stands up, staggers to the couch, and starts to lie down.)
[Scene: at Barry and Mindy's reception, Monica and Richard are sitting at a table, and Monica is trying to throw a piece of candy into his mouth.]
Monica: I mean, my feelings for Richard are certainly gone.
RICHARD: Boy I would just uh, I would freak out.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are there. Phoebe enters.]
Story by Mark J. Kunerth Teleplay by Richard Goodman Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
MONICA: Hi. Richard just told me he loves me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are setting the table.]
RICHARD: Monica's making us watch Old Yeller.
Richards Date: Well, I just wanted to see where you lived. Now, give me the tour.
Monica: Oh my God. Richard? (turns around) Hi!
Monica: This is crazy! I mean, it's such a stupid argument. I don't even wanna see Richard again.
RICHARD: Charlotte who?
Phoebe: (sitting down) Oh good! All right, so you decided to tell him about the Richard thing.
RICHARD: Yeah, if I have to. Monica, I don't wanna lose you, so if I have to do it all over again, then I will.
RICHARD: Yeah, just, I feel like I'm about a hundred. I thought I was just one of the guys.
MRS. GELLER: Richard. Richard. Your son isn't seeing anyone is he?
Phoebe: Richard Simmons?! Oh my God!
Richards Date: Yeah, but I didnt get to see it.
Chandler: No! Her boyfriend Richard!
Richard: That can be arranged.
(They hug, and Richard notices a stocking stuck to Monicas back, which he removes for her.)
RICHARD: Uh, in the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand...
RICHARD: Oh, hey. I love children, I have children. I just don't want to be 70 when our kids go off to college, and our lives can finally start.
Dedicated to the Memory of Richard L. Cox, Sr.
MONICA: Ok. [Richard walks in] Hey, why don't you ask Richard?
RICHARD: Hey, be right there.
Richard: Wow. Y'know were back where we were. Honey, I would love to do all that, but nothings changed.
Ross: Well, this is ironic. Of your last two boyfriends, Richard didnt want to have kids, and from the looks of it, now Pete cant.
RICHARD: Wow. Well being a huge Knicks fan myself, I think you should take someone who's a huge Knicks fan.
RICHARD: Uh, the guy was Lou Gehrig. Didn't you kinda see it coming?
Monica: No, my eye doctor is Richard! I cant go to him when I dont have a boyfriend!
MONICA: Hey. Where is he, where's Richard? Did you ditch him?
RICHARD: That's fine. Well, your other dad and I are gonna go have a romantic evening and I guess I'll just see you kids around.
RICHARD: Oh honey, I'm fine.
[Richard enters]
Richard: We may not have any weapons, but we still have food. In the basement I saw potatoes and some dry pasta, and a few tins of tuna! (Joey backs away and wipes his face again.)
RICHARD: Hey, you're gettin' better. I'm gonna keep this by the way.
JOEY: How come Richard looks so much cooler with one of these than me?
MONICA: You know what, I think it's cute, you trying to be more like Richard.
RICHARD: Hey Phoebs, what's happening?
MONICA: You're meeting Richard?
RICHARD: It's the basketball playoffs.
[Cut to that same kitchen, only this is The One With The Proposal, Richard is telling Monica something.]
CHANDLER: Hey listen, we've gotta go, I promised Richard we'd meet him downstairs.
RICHARD: I know, I know. Just hang in there, OK. OK, I'll go out first, alright.
Richard: Is that my ass? (Hes looking at Joeys.)
Monica: Me going out with Richards son.
RICHARD: Ok. [leaves]
RICHARD: What?
PHOEBE: What, what's about to happen? [starts watching] I've never seen this part before. Hey, Travis, watcha doin' with that gun? Oh no, no no Travis, put down the gun. No no no no, he he's your buddy, he's your Yeller, no, no no, the end, THE END. [hear the gunshot from the TV] [Scene:Monica and Rachel's apartment. Richard is on the balcony smoking and Monica is on the phone.]
RICHARD: Guys. Seriously, it is not like that.
RICHARD: Jack, would you let it go?
RICHARD: Happy birthday.
RICHARD: How ya doin'?
RICHARD: Really?
RICHARD: She's not a twinkie.
RICHARD: Oh?
RICHARD: Uh, Phoebe, I don't think your mom would want you to see what's about to happen.
RICHARD: Two.
RICHARD: Oh, thank you Phoebs. That's very sweet.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are playing Richard at foosball.]
RICHARD: Right, and...
RICHARD: Right.
RICHARD: No.
RICHARD: Hey.
RICHARD: Monica.
RICHARD: Well, we had a table in college.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Monica is in the bathroom and Richard comes in.]
RICHARD: Shall we?
RICHARD: Is everything all right?
RICHARD: Ok, just one more point.
RICHARD: Uh-oh.
RICHARD: No. You have got it completely wrong. John Savage was deerhunter, no legs, John Voit was coming home, couldn't feel his legs.
RICHARD: Well.
RICHARD: Uh-huh, yeah.
RICHARD: Uh, you guys see me as a dad?
RICHARD: Ohh, brisk tonight.
Richard: Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
RICHARD: Well, that's not bad at all. I mean, you had me thinkin it was like a fleet.
Richard: Youve got panties stuck to your leg.
[Cut to into the bedroom, with Monica still hiding under the covers. Richard enters and sits down next to her.]
RICHARD: Oh, alright.
RICHARD: Oh, well that's not so crazy.
RICHARD: What're you doing?
RICHARD: Uh, it's the college playoffs.
RICHARD: Thank you.
RICHARD: You're strict.