words in movies
[cut to a montage of scenes involving Bonnie, Ross, and Rachel from the last episode.]
Joey: (voice-over) Oh-oh! And then Rosss new girlfriend, Bonnie, shows up and Rachel convinced her to save her head. And then Ross and Rachel kiss, and now Ross has to choose between Rachel and the bald girl and I dont know what happened there either...
[Scene: The beach house, its the same scene from the end of last year, with Ross in front of the two doors of Rachels and Bonnies rooms, trying to decide which door to choose. He finally chooses the one his right and goes in.]
Ross: (surprised) Hi!
Ross: Awww.
Bonnie: (getting up and leaving) (to Ross) Okay, Ill see you in our room.
Ross: Yeah. (closes the door, and goes over and kisses Rachel.)
Ross: I know.
Ross: (stopping suddenly and getting up) Okay, I gotta go.
Ross: Well, I-I gotta go break up with Bonnie.
Ross: Well, yeah. I cant-I cant stay here all night, and if I go in there shes-shes gonna wanna... do stuff.
Ross: No, she likes that. Yeah. Faking sleep doesnt work either, I cant tell you how many mornings I woke up with her...
Ross: Whoa-oh, okay! Yeah, why am I telling you that?
Ross: Yeah, yeah. (opens the door) It wasnt every morning.
Ross: Okay.
[Scene: The beach house, Rachels bedroom. She is finishing up writing something as Ross walks through the door.]
Ross: Its over.
Ross: Well, it was loong. I didnt even realise how late it was, until I noticed the 5 oclock shadow on her head. (They both start to laugh, then stop themselves quickly.) Anyway, she didnt want to stay. I called a cab; she just left.
Ross: Ohh! Thank you! I like mail. (He goes to kiss her again, but she turns away.)
Ross: Okay. (He leans in to kiss her again, but she leans back preventing him from making contact.) Wow, its-its 5:30 in the morning. (Rachel laughs) So, Id better get cracking on this baby.
Ross: Okay, Ill be up in, (looks at the letter) 18 pages. Front and back. Very exciting.
[Scene: The beach house, the next morning. Ross is passed out on the kitchen counter. He wakes up with a start and has one of the pages of the letter stuck to his face.]
Ross: Oh. (looks at his watch) Oh-oh. (takes a drink of coffee and resumes reading the letter)
Rachel: (coming down the stairs) Hey! (Ross jumps up, and quickly puts the letter back together, pretending like he has just finished it.) What happened to you? Why didnt you come up?
Ross: Done!
Ross: Well, I wanted to be thorough. I mean this-this is clearly very, very important to you, to us! And so I wanted to read every word carefully, twice!
Ross: Im sorry.
Ross: Does it? Does it? Yeah, I wanted to give that whole Does it? part just another glance.
Rachel: What are you talking about, Ross, you just said that you read it twice! Look, y'know what, either it does or it doesnt, and if you have to even think about it...
Ross: (interrupting) No, Rach, no. I dont, I dont, I dont have to think about it, in fact, Ive decided, Ive decided that, that it.......does.
(Rachel stands there for a moment, starting to cry. Then gasps and runs over and hugs him. While hugging her, Ross tries to find the Does it? part in the letter.)
Ross: Oh, sure! Im sure.
Phoebe: Well, Im ready to get the hell out of here! (Sees Ross and Rachel cuddling on the couch.) Oh. Are you? Are you?!! (they nod Yes.) Ohh! Thats so great!! Ooh, not for Bonnie. (they nod No.) But for you, yay! Ohh.
Ross: Hey!
Ross: What happened?
Ross: It does. It really and truly does.
(Rachel kisses him, and goes upstairs. After shes gone, Ross frantically tries to find and read the Does it? part.)
Ross: (finding the part) (looks up in disgust) It so does not!!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is telling Joey and Chandler about the letter.]
Ross: She wants me to take responsibility for everything that went wrong in our relationship. I mean she goes on for five pages about, about how I was unfaithful to her! (Both Joey and Chandler shrug their shoulders as to say Well...) (yelling) WE WERE ON A BREAK!!!!!
Ross: Fine! Fine! But this break-up was not all my fault, and she, she says here, (reading from the letter) If you accept full responsibility... (to Chandler and Joey) Full responsibility! ...I can begin to trust you again. Does that seem like something you can do. (yells at Joey) Does it?!!
Chandler: Look, Ross, you have what you want, youre back with Rachel. If you bring this up now youre gonna wreck the best thing that even happened to you.
Ross: (calming down) Yeah, I know. I mean, no, youre right. Yeah I guess Ill let it go. But you-you understand how-how hard it is to forget about this.
Ross: What the hell happened on that beach?!
Joey: Its between us and the sea, Ross!
(Ross laughs and has a Come on... look on his face as he looks and Chandler who nods his head in agreement with Joey. Ross is stunned.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are sitting at the table eating dinner and not talking. Ross and Rachel are outside cuddling on the balcony.]
Ross: (coming back in with Rachel) Hey, you guys! What do you, what do you think about making that beach trip an annual thing?
Ross and Rachel: Come on!
Ross: What happened? Joey?
Ross: Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah! About jellyfish and how if you... (stops suddenly and turns to look at Monica) Ewwww!! You peed on yourself?!
Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel: (turning to look at Joey) Ewwww!!
[Scene: Rachels bedroom. Ross and Rachel have just finished consummating the new relationship.]
Ross: I missed you too.
Ross: (getting miffed) I suppose.
Rachel: You have! Ross, you should give yourself credit. I mean my Mom never thought this would work out. It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater.
Ross: (getting angry) Umm-hmm.
Ross: (yelling from the bedroom) WE WERE ON A BREAK!!!!!!!
Ross: And for the record, it took two people to break up this relationship!!
Ross: I didnt know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! I didnt finish the whole letter!
Ross: I fell asleep!
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Ross: (starts to cry) FINE BY ME!! (he opens the door and traps Chandler behind it)
Rachel: (to Monica) Sorry!! (to Ross) I just feel bad about all that sleep youre gonna miss wishing you were with me!
Ross: Oh, no-no-no dont you worry about me falling asleep. I still have your letter!!!
Rachel: (to Ross) Yes! Did you see that?
Ross: No.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: What a beautiful story. Hey, I'm fine by the way.
Ross: He's in! Oh, did you hear that, Marcel? San Diego. San Diego!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is getting coffee at the counter. Chandler walks in.]
Ross: What?
Ross: Okay, flight 421 to Paris. I don't see it, do you see it?
Will: Me and Ross. (Points at Ross.)
Rachel: Even so, I think I'm gonna pick Ross.
Rachel: I think shes checking out your beehive Ross.
Ross: C'mon! C'mon!
Rachel: Whoa, wait, listen, I think Im just gonna talk to Ross about what he think it meant.
Paul: Ross, look, I know Ive been giving you a lot of jabs and its partly because Im very protective of Lizzie, and partly because well, they just keep coming to me. But I have to admit that after all the wonderful things that Lizzie has told me and the many, many, (pause) many stories that Rachel has told me that, well (pause) youre not (pause) all bad.
[Joey and Ross make confused faces.]
Ross: Must pee. (Goes to pee.)
Rachel: I didnt have to, because I was wearing my I heart Ross sandwich board and ringing my bell.
Ross: I can't believe that didn't work!
Ross: (in a deep voice) I'll have whatever Christine is having.
Phoebe: Rach, look! (she holds two buns up to her ears to make her hair look like the Princess Leia 'do.) Oh, hi! Where is my strong Ross Skywalker to come rescue me. (Ross stands up horrified) There he is.
[Scene: The Porsche, cars are whizzing by and honking their horns on both sides very quickly as Ross creeps along.]
Ross: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight.
Ross: Well ah, Aunt Silvia was, well not a nice person.
Ross: Okay, okay, we were on the ride along with Gary, right?
Ross: Yeah. Do that for another two hours, you might be where I am right about now. (He enters.)
Ross: Monica? You're Mom.
Ross: Of course not, I'm... suggesting Geller-Willick-Bunch.
Ross: You're right, you're right, it is...So you gonna invite us all to the big opening?
Ross: Actually, do you guys mind staying here for a while?
Carol: Ross, you remember Susan.
(After she's left, Ross gets really happy and starts kissing the card. Suddenly, she returns.)
Ross: Over here. (You can see Ross sitting at the far wall.)
Rachel: Well, Ross, we were worried about you. We didn't know how you were going to react.
Ross: Yeah! I know! It was. Oh the only sad thing is I wasnt around when it happened for the first time.
Ross: Oh, shhh, shh. Magic is about to happen.
Ross: No? What happened, big guy?
Ross: (to Gary) He told you everything! I mean you totally cracked him!
Ross: Oh whats the big deal?! I wasnt even invited to the ceremony, just the reception. And-and yknow what? If it makes you feel any better, Joan and I will just make an appearance and then, and then well-well leave early as a sign of protest.
Ross: Doesn't sound as crazy as paying a thousand dollars for a cat.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
Ross: The word you're looking for is 'Anyway'...
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is showing Ross, Rachel, Joey, and Phoebe his engagement ring again.]
Rachel: Its a truffle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch, [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef sauteed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
Ross: Okay. I think it's time to change somebody's nicotine patch. (Does so.)
[Cut to inside the apartment, Ross decides to let Monica in and goes over and opens the door in mid-pound.]
Ross: Some can sing, some can dance. I apparently can turn phallic cakes into woodland creatures.
Rachel: Um... Ross?
Ross: That's my sister.
Ross: Pheebs, what about you?
Ross: Well, it was the only thing to do there that didn't have a line.
Ross: Step back.
Ross: Come on.
(Chandler laughs, turns, and sees that Ross and Joey arent happy.)
Ross: You won an adult Thanksgiving day spelling bee.
Ross: Mmmm.
Ross: I do.
(Ross gets up, pleased with himself.)
Ross: Wow, how many have you got?
Ross: Shhhh!
Chandler: Y'know what this is like? This is like when my parents got divorced. Man, I hope Ross doesnt try to kidnap me after Cub Scouts.
Joey: Okay, if Ross and Rachel ask, I've been here the whole time. THE WHOLE TIME!
Ross: Oh. Hel-lo!
Ross: See?
Joey: Uh hey look uh Ross, look I think we need to talk about before.
Ross: I'm going to do it.
Ross: Gimmie! (Takes the ring and puts it in his coat pocket as Rachel enters the hallway.)
Ross: Yes, yes, that's right...
(Ross flinches in pain.)
Rachel: All right Monica, do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?!
Ross: (nonchalantly) Yeah?
Ross: But is it technically a date if the other person doesn't show up?
Ross: How come? Everybody else does.
Ross: It's not that easy, there's still a lot of relationship stuff.
Rachel: And Ross.
Ross: Kay, first of all, this attitude is not helping.
Ross: I dont know, I-I was all high.
Ross: No no no, go-
(Suddenly, theres movement beside her, startling her. Its Ross! He wakes up and they both start screaming in terror. Then they both grab their heads having aggravated their hangovers.)
Ross: Okay. Um is he a good guy?
Mrs. Green: With another woman. Have you no control Ross?
Ross: Wha-What did he say that was so funny?
Ross: Carol was wearing boots just like those the night that we- we first- y'know. Fact, she, uh- she never took'em off, 'cause we-we- (off Chandler's look) Sorry. Sorry.
Joey: Look, Ross look, Im on board about this totally honesty thing, I am, just not about stuff thats gonna get you in trouble.
Ross: That's... that's classic.
(Ross looks at Joey.)
Ross: Thing, yes. Thing.
Paolo: Ross!
Ross: Paolo. Hi.
Ross: Yeah! Se vice?
Ross: Well umm, oh! I might be teaching another class this semester!
Ross: I dont know, aheh, yours was the first name that-that popped into my head, Im Im sorry. I-I didnt think it would matter.
Ross: Thank you.
Ross: Great! Great. Then I mustve left it at Monas. I knew it!
Ross: Oh.. oh... oh.
Ross: That guy, he burns me up.
Ross: No you didn't. You said you would, but you never did!
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Ross, and Julie are sitting on the couch.]
Ross: Kinda... spooky without any lights.
Ross: (rolling) Lucky sixes....