words in movies
(Suddenly the doors burst open, and ROSS AND RACHEL COME OUT ARM-IN-ARM!!!!! And Rachel's carrying a bouquet!!! THEY GOT MARRIED!!!!)
Ross: Well, hello, Mrs. Ross! (Throws some rice.)
Joey: Ross and Rachel left us a message saying they were getting married! Isnt that why you guys are here?
(Suddenly, theres movement beside her, startling her. Its Ross! He wakes up and they both start screaming in terror. Then they both grab their heads having aggravated their hangovers.)
Ross: Why are we in bed together?
Ross: (checks) Yeah.
Ross: No! But we-we didnt have sex-uh, did we? I mean, I dont remember much about last night, it was such a blur.
Ross: And we didnt have sex.
Ross: (getting up) Tell me about it. (He sits up on the edge of the bed and has "Just Married" written on his back.)
Joey: Oh my God! Thats huge! (Hugs him.) Wait a minute, why come I wasnt invited? And who was going to be your best man? Dont say, "Ross." Do not say, "Ross."
Chandler: Look, I just dont think Monica and I are ready to get married yet! Yknow? I mean, I love her and everything but seeing Ross and Rachel coming out of that chapel was like a, like a wake-up call that Monica and I are moving so fast. Yknow? And, how do I tell her without crushing her?
(Ross and Rachel enter.)
Ross: Hey!
Ross: What?
Rachel: (To Ross) I dont know. (To the gang.) What do you mean last night? Nothing, nothing uh, happened last night.
Ross: Yeah!
Phoebe: Uh-huh! Ross invited us all to watch.
(Rachel turns to Ross stunned.)
Rachel: (gasps) Who got married?! (Ross is as surprised to hear this as she is.)
Ross: What?! Hello! We didnt get married.
Ross: We-we-weI remember being in a chapel.
Ross: IThey would not let us get married when we were that drunk!
Rachel: Well, I guess we just find a divorce lawyer? (Looks at Ross.)
Chandler: Well, I think, I think, Ross already has one. Now, this ones free, right? Because you paid for the first two, so the third ones free.
Ross: Laugh it up, but the jokes on you. Because we dont need to get divorced, okay? We were just gonna get an annulment.
Joey: An annulment? Ross! I dont think surgerys the answer here.
Ross: What?
Ross: No-no, thats-thats not my thing! I do not love getting divorced!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is on the couch as Ross enters.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Yeah. Yeah, actually um, I wanted to talk to you about that whole annulment thing?
Ross: Im not going to do that. (Rachel glares at him.)
Ross: Yes, exactly!
Ross: Wow! This is so amazing. I uh, I really thought Id have to talk you into this more.
Ross: Im-Im not kidding. Look I-I, I cant have three failed marriages. I cant. Okay? I-I am not gonna be that guy!
Ross: Okay, look, how is this gonna affect you? Really? I mean you fill some form out once and a while and instead of checking the box that says Ms you check the box that says Mrs.! Its right next to it!
Ross: Im asking you to do me a favor.
{Note: Does anyone else want to smack Ross right about now? Raise your hands. Okay, put them down before you stink out the person next to you.}
Ross: And as my wife I think you should grant me this favor.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is entering.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Listen, I know you wanted to talk to me, but I have an idea that may make you want to stay married. (Rachel shakes her head.) We register, and you get to keep all the presents!
Rachel: (thinks about it for a second) No! Ross, come on! No! Listen, look I thought a lot about how to tell you this and the bottom line, Ross, is we can not stay married.
Ross: I dont know if its true.
Ross: Oh, okay, yknow what this is? This is a difference of opinion. And when that happens in a marriage...
Rachel: Oh Ross, come on! This is not, this is not a marriage!! This is the worlds worst hangover! Ross, listen, if you do not get this annulment, I will!
Ross: All right. All right, Ill do it.
(Ross turns and leaves.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are on the couch as Ross enters.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Oh, yeah, no problems. Its all taken care of.
Rachel: Ross, thank you. Hey, do you guys wanna go see a movie?
Ross: Oh yeah, why not?
Ross: Okay. (Sits down next to Phoebe.) You uh, you wanna hear something weird?
Ross: I didnt get the annulment.
Ross: Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. (He gets up leaving Phoebe in shock.)
Rachel: How's Ross doing? Y'know since all the Emily stuff.
ROSS: Scotch. Alright, I'll be back in 10 seconds with your scotch on the rocks in a glass.
Joey: Ross?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is trying to tell Rachel about Emily's ultimatum again.]
Ross: Pretty cool, huh?
(There's another pause as Ross gets angry again.)
PHOEBE: What? Is it - is this 'cause of what Ross said?
(Ross takes his suitcase and tries to get out but ends up falling on Prof. Sherman's laps, thereby waking him up)
Monica: Yeah. But of course we had to update it a little bit. (To Ross) Hey, by the way, great thinking about catching me!
Ross: Oh my God its just like I dreamed it!
Ross: I just, I hate this so much! I mean, every time I go pick her up at the airport, its-its so great. But at the same time Im thinking, "Well, Im gonna be right back there in a couple of days, dropping her off."
Ross: It would be so cool to live across from you guys!
Ross: Oh, come on, now you know you want em.
Ross: Let me ask you something, at your school was there a like uh a place on campus where students went to uh, fool around.
Ross: Umm (Rachel blows her nose.)
ROSS: Ohh. . . Thanks Rach, goodnight. [goes back in apartment]
Ross: (To Chandler) How about you?
Ross: You have no idea what a nightmare this has been. This is so hard.
Ross: But the good news is, no one in a two-block radius will ever know.
Ross: Oh no-no-no, it's my pleasure.
Chandler: About Ross!
ROSS: Rach, come on, open up. Rach, come on, come on, Rach. You got to give me another chance.
Joey: Cut it out Ross! I hate to have to save your life and kick your ass in the same day!
Ross: I'll take sports.
Ross: That was going to be my next argument.
Ross: It's just a fur ball.
Chandler: (entering) All right! Okay! I think I am making some progress with Joey, when I went into the apartment he went straight into his bedroom but he only slammed the door once! (Ross is pleased.) I mean yeah, he gave me the finger while doing it.
ROSS: OK sweetie, I'll see you later.
ROSS: It was ridiculous. Ya know, these guys, they were bullies, actual bullies, ya know. We're grown ups, this kinda stuff isn't supposed to happen anymore.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe enters to see Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel tearfully watching TV.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, and Chandler are there.]
Carol: (entering from the kitchen) Hey Ross!
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Why are they here?
Ross: Well, they're not mine!
Amy: H-Hi!!(to Ross) And you are...?
Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel: (turning to look at Joey) Ewwww!!
Ross: Well I-I-I, that kind of thing requires some serious thought. First, Ill divide my perspective canidates into catergories....
Ross: Well, I still think I was right about that whole Mark thing.
ROSS: No, no way. You've got it totally the other way around my friend. John Voit was...
(Phoebe mocks what Monica just said. Ross pulls Chandler aside.)
Ross: (entering, depressed) Hi.
Ross: Alright, you know what? You're right. I should at least tell her how I feel.
Ross: (quietly) That-that would be incredible. Thank you so much. I-I still can't believe someone ate it!! I mean, look, I left a note and everything.
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Ross are returning from working out.]
Ross: No, I-I-Im serious, okay? I mean, think about it. You move in, you start fighting over stupid game rooms, next thing yknow you break up!
Ross: (entering) Phoebe!
Ross: All right. Uhh, international.
Joey: Leetch spots Messier in the crease- there's the pass! (He kicks it to Ross, but Ross is staring into a shop window.)
Chandler: You got a man who's a nanny...? You got a manny...? (Monica starts laughing, but very exaggerated. Joey realises they also should laugh and punches Ross. Now all three of them laugh, but very fake. Chandler seems happy again.)
Ross: Well, but aren't you pissed at him?! I mean this guy abandoned you! I gotta tell you if this were me, this guy would be in some serious physical danger! (Getting worked up) I mean I-I-I'd walk in there and I'd be like, "Yo, dad! You and me outside right now!" (Calming down.) I kinda scared myself.
[Rachel comes out of her apartment, followed by Mark, and they leave on their date, without saying a word to Ross. Ross is stunned.]
Joey: Ohh, you're upset because you think I chose Ross over you! No! I knew you could take care of yourself. Y'know, I mean Ross, he need help. He's not street like us!
Ross: What?!
Ross: (tightening his tie) And so do I.
Ross: (Proudly) Yeah.
Ross: What?
Ross: You ate my sandwich?
Ross: Wow. Umm Huh I'm-I'm not sure what to do with that right now.
Ross: After one class? I dont think so.
Quartet: Your loyal loving boyfriend Ross..... Ross!
Monica: Ross, you were right before, it was just a stupid fight about a room.
Chandler: Ross?
Monica: Ross, are you okay?
(Phoebe tries to throw some quarters out the window, but she has forgotten to open the window, and she and Ross scream.)
Ross: Practical jokes.
Ross: (on phone) Uh, hello dad! Monica and I just saw the house in the paper! (Listens) Yes were surprised! (Listens) Who did you leave a message with?
Ross: Pheebs, did you want a cookie?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler are sitting at a table. Rachel is working. Monica and Phoebe enter.]
Rachel: Look! (Shows Ross the picture.)
Ross: You slept with my sister?
Ross: Yeah, what's going on?
Joey: They're so small! (Both he and Ross look at them with satisfied looks on their faces.)
Ross: I can't believe Chandler is missing this!
Ross: My God Monica!!
Ross: I love you. (goes to kiss her and she turns away.)
[The next one is from Episode 712: The One Where Theyre Up All Night, Joey and Ross are deciding how to climb down the final part of the fire escape.]
Rachel: (entering) Forgot my purse! (Sees them kissing.) Oh, you guys made up. (To Mona) Hes a good kisser isnt he? (Ross goes to close the door on her.) Im going! (Quickly leaves and Ross locks the door.)
Ross: Oh no, not yet.
Chandler: No, you kidding? The guy's a freak.. (Ross enters off camera)
Ross: Mmm-Unmm.
Ross: So what, we just sit?
Ross: You have a line down your face.
[Scene: Flight 1066 to Athens, Rachel is ordering a drink for Ross and herself.]
RACHEL: Hi. [Ross turns to Rachel and they hug]
Parker: (laughs) Classic Ross. Rachel, Rachel, oh how you glow. May I? (Puts hand on her stomach)
Phoebe: (answering the phone) (whispering) Ross, thank God.
Ross: The guy who took Rachel to the prom? Why is he calling you?
[Scene: Hallway, Ross and Rachel are returning from dinner.]
Ross: Or that.
Ross: Yeah!
Ross: And it can't be Joey.
Ross: Or Joseph.
Rachel: All right. Look. Gavin...I...I guess I felt guilty that you were here, which I shouldn't. You know Ross and I are not inany relationship but...he is the father of my child, and you know we do live together and plus there is just so muchhistory...you know it's just...I don't know, I'm sorry, I'm just all over the place.
Ross: Yeah. Look, you don't, you don't talk about like, you know, your girlfriend and the intimate stuff you, you do with her.
Monica: Ross didnt scare you?
Ross: No seriously. I have job security for life. You know, I never have to worry. (Rachel starts crying) Oh, look at you. Look how happy you are for me.
Ross: Oh.. you don't get it! (Passes out and slumps across her)
Ross: Oh-oh, yeah.
Ross: Yeah.