words in movies
Ross: C'mon, Chandler, I love your mom. I think she's a blast.
Ross: Oh, please...
Ross: When did Rigatoni get back from Rome?
Ross: Ah, so then his plane didn't explode in a big ball of fire?... Just a dream I had- but, phew.
Ross: (Entering) What is this dive? Only you could've picked this place.
Mrs. Bing: There y'go. Ross?
Ross: Uh, I'm not really a shot drinking kinda guy.
Ross: ...But a man can change. (Downs a shot)
[Time lapse. Ross is now clearly drunk. He is holding up a shot glass to his eye like a jeweller's eye.]
Ross: Anyone want me to appraise anything?
(Ross emerges from a toilet marked 'Chicas')
Ross: Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine. (A woman emerges from the toilet behind him and he tries to pretend he was in the other one)
Ross: Nothing. Nothing nothing nothing.
Mrs. Bing: (To phone) Okay, thank you. (To Ross) It's the Italian Hand-Licker, isn't it.
Ross: No. It's the one he's licking.
Ross: You're good.
Mrs. Bing: Oh, Ross, listen to me. I have sold a hundred million copies of my books, and y'know why?
Ross: The girl on the cover with her nipples showing?
Ross: When?
Ross: The guy on the cover with his nipples showing?
Ross: Please.
Ross: Right.
Ross: Uh-oh...
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, the next morning. Joey is getting the door in his dressing gownit's Ross.]
Ross: Hey, is Chandler here?
(Ross drags Joey into the hall and slams the door)
Ross: Okay, uh, about last night, um, Chandler.. you didn't tell... (Joey shakes his head) Okay, 'cause I'm thinking- we don't need to tell Chandler, I mean, it was just a kiss, right? One kiss? No big deal? Right?
Ross: Okay.
Ross: What code?
Ross: Uh.. uh.. Well, Joey and I had discussed getting in an early morning racquetball game. But, um, apparently, somebody overslept.
Ross: No, no I don't, because it's being restrung, somebody was supposed to bring me one.
Ross: Okay, I'm scum, I'm scum.
Joey: Ross, how could you let this happen?
Ross: I don't know, God, I... well, it's not like she's a regular mom, y'know? She's, she's sexy, she's...
Ross: Well... not in the same way...
Ross: Okay, I think we're getting into a weird area here...
Ross: Hey.
Ross: Well, not playing raquetball!
Ross: He didn't get the goggles!
(They kiss. Ross is watching them)
Ross: Do they wait for me to do this?
(Joey and Ross go into Monica and Rachel's apartment)
Ross: Why would I tell him?
Ross: Oh...
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross is talking to Chandler. Joey is making a snack at the bar.]
Ross: You're my friend. I-I had to tell you.
Ross: Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and you know how he gets when he's drun..uh... (He has caught sight of Joey scowling at him) I can't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.
Ross: I was really upset about Rachel and Paolo, and I think I had too much tequila, and Nora- um, Mrs. Mom- your Bing- was just being nice, y'know, and- But nothing happened, nothing- Ask Joey, Joey, uh, came in-
Ross: Thanks, man, big help.
Chandler: (To Ross) I can't believe this! What the hell were you thinking?
Ross: I wasn't- I mean, I-
Ross: I know-
Ross: Chandler-
Ross: Chandler-
Joey: (Shouting after him) Chandler, I didn't kiss her, he did! (To Ross) See what happens when you break the code?
Ross: Joey-
Joey: (To Ross, on the couch) Now, here's a picture of my mother and father on their wedding day. Now you tell me she's not a knockout.
Ross: I cannot believe we're having this conversation.
Ross: Oh, uh, Phoebe just started a...
Ross: Chandler, can I just say something? I-I know you're still mad at me, I just wanna say that there were two people there that night. Okay? Two sets of lips.
Ross: Okay, well, if she always behaves like this, why don't you say something?
Ross: (To the rest of Central Perk) We're rehearsing a Greek play.
Ross: No! Okay, you mean, you're not gonna talk to her, you're not gonna tell her how you feel?
Ross: Okay, 'you' can't, or (Points to Chandler) you can't? (Chandler grabs his finger) Okay, that's my finger. (Chandler twists it and Ross goes down on one knee) That's, that's my knee. (To Central Perk) Still doing the play. Aaah!
Chandler: You kissed my best Ross! ...Or something to that effect.
[Cut to the hallway, Joey is listening to Chandler and his mom's conversation through the door as Ross walks up.]
Ross: Ah, the forbidden love of a man and his door.
Ross: You're kidding.
Ross: Wow!
Ross: 'Kay, wait a minute, are you sure she didn't say "When are you gonna grow up and realise I am your mom?"
Ross: So, what's going on now?
Ross: Whaddya see?
(Joey runs off down the hall. Ross tries Monica and Rachel's apartment, but it is locked so he has to stand in the hall and pretend he wasn't listening. Chandler and his mom come out)
Ross: (Very politely) Mrs. Bing.
(Ross knocks on Monica and Rachel's door)
Ross: You mean that?
Ross: Yeah? How'd it go?
Ross: Well, howdya feel?
Ross: Well, see? So, maybe it wasn't such a bad idea, y'know, me kissing your mom, uh? Huh? (Wags his finger at Chandler, then puts it down) But.. we don't have to go down that road.
Ross: Wait, did you get to the part about his 'huge throbbing pens'? Tell ya, you don't wanna be around when he starts writing with those!
ROSS: Monica, Monica, you could come in straddling him, they still wouldn't believe it. [opens door] We're here.
Ross: So Pheebs, how long is your mom gonna be with us?
Ross: I do have a newfound respect for life.
Phoebe: Ross!!!
Ross: DANGER!!! DANGER!!!!!
Ross: Whats up?
Ross: Okay. Umm, for a while now, I've been wanting to, um....
Ross: Wait! No! Ben, come here! I am not kidding!
Ross: Oh, why dont you make her one of your little jokes.
Ross: Unagi. Im always aware.
Ross: And if you wait right here, Ill go get Ross. (Phoebe grabs his arm and prevents him from escaping.)
Ross: Why not?
Ross: Oh.
Ross: No, Susans gonna be there too. Weve got dads, weve got lesbians, the whole parenting team.
Ross: Okay, Ill see you later pal.
Ross: And the place looks so nice!
Ross: Im gonna get you to talk to Chandler.
Ross: Oh man! I want that place so much!! I was so sure that was gonna work! There's twelve bucks I'll never see again! (Exits.)
Ross: Or you can sit with him on the front porch and make sure no one steals the trash cans. He does that every week too.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Ross and Rachel are talking.]
Ross: Y'know, hey! Youre the one who ended it, remember?
Ross: Its not something you are! Its something you have!
The Flight Attendant: (To Ross) Hope you had a nice flight.
Ross: Look, is Rachel here? I really need to talk to her.
Ross: I played bad on purpose guys.
(Joey looks at Ross with a horrified look on his face.)
Ross: Yes thats right.
Ross: No. No-no. No. What would you do next?
Rachel: Ross, didn't you ah, play soccer in High School? Oh no wait, that's right. You just organized their game schedules on your Commodore 64.
Ross: Ah-ha, nowhere to run! (He starts to run towards them.)
Phoebe: Why is Ross doing that?
Ross: (glaring at Joey) This would be the place where you explain the hat.
Ross: Uh, no, no, see, because not...not all guys are going to be a Paolo.
Ross: DANGER!!!!
Ross: Well with Carol, I promised never to love another woman until the day I die. She made no such promise.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: No suds? Excuse me, hold on a second. (to woman) That's my friend's machine.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler, Rachel, and Joey are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: What?! No! No! Wait! Youre right, this is stupid. Who cares what people think? I mean, I mean we like each other right? Theres nothing wrong with that. Come on. (They get up and go over to the table where his colleagues are sitting.) Burt? Lydia? Mel? This is Elizabeth.
Ross: Hop in. (Phoebe hops in.) Get ready for the smoothest ride of your life.
ROSS: Will you hold Ben for a sec? Come here. Come here.
Ross: (answering it) Uh-oh, saved by the bell. (On phone) Hello?
Ross: You do appear right on the cusp of something. Come on man, I'm sure he'll lose interest in a week or two, but for now can you please just do this for me?
Ross: Why- why are you here, Carol?
Ross: That was you?
Ross: What time?
Ross: (startled) Yeah?
Ross: Hey, thanks Rach. (They hug.)
Ross: Gotcha. (Starts to leave.)
Ross: Oh! So-so seriously, what time?
Ross: Me either... (He pulls up a stool so that he doesn't have to move his hand.)
Chandler: I'll take that bet my friend. And you know what, paying me the 50 bucks could be the "new thing you do that day!" (Ross looks at him.) And it starts right now!
Ross: Yeah, yeah, itll be great! You can, you can lay on the beach and I can cry over my failed marriage. See-see how I make jokes?
Ross: Okay, bye-bye. (starts slamming the receiver down in anger.)
Ross: You're right! (Gives her the twenty she won.)
Chandler: Sure, and Joey; do not let Ross look at any of the maps or the globe in your apartment.
Ross: I have shown you everything we have. Unless you want your mother to spend eternity in a lemon yellow pant-suit, go with the burgundy.
Chandler and Ross: Hey! Hey Adrienne. (They move away from her)
[Scene: A street, Ross is walking with Elizabeth on their date.]
Ross: Umm, no. No.
Joey: Look weve got to find her. Phoebe just called!! Rachels coming to tell Ross she loves him!!
Mona: Id be happy to. (To Ross) You are very sweet.
Ross: Who would you rather be Simon or Garfunkle?
Ross: We had such a great time! Shes-shes incredible! I thought the-the age difference might be a problem, but it wasnt. It wasnt at all. Elizabeth is very mature for her age. (Joey makes the international sign for big boobies.) (To Monica) A concept lost on some people!
Ross: Yeah. What-what should I do?
Rachel: Okay. Phoebe, I-I think Ross is right. What are we gonna do?
Ross: Going out with who?
Ross: Okay, well be right in. (to Chandler) So ah, did your boss try to slap you again today?
Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel: (turning to look at Joey) Ewwww!!
Ross: (exiting the bathroom) That-that-thats all right, no honey, you take your time sweetie. Ill be right out here. (She slams the door in his face, to the gang) Shes just fixing her makeup.
Rachel: Ross, my father doesnt hate you.
Ross: Nothing, Im-Im just, Im so comfortable with you!
Ross: Oh, you have some studying to do?
Ross: What?
Ross: Why do they keep doing that?
Ross: What? No! Of course, of course I do! Are-are they gone?
Ross: (on the phone) Hi, this is Ross Geller in suite 206. It seems you forgot a couple of things. Could you have some complimentary toiletries sent up to my room? (pause) Thank you! Ok. Toothbrush, toothpaste, razor, mouthwash, deodorant, dental floss, band aids, shaving cream, after shave... and I feel like I am forgetting something... Is there anything else you have that I haven't asked for already? (pause) Yeah, go ahead, send up some tampons.
Ross: Ooh, somebody's getting a little fussy.
Ross: Slides are almost ready.
Ross: What?
Ross: Really?
ROSS: OK, see ya later, nice meeting you. [man leaves] You're welcome.
Ross: LookOkay, Im just gonnaIm gonna have to go find him and bring him back! Okay? You-you make sure Monica does not find out, okay?
Ross: Oh, whatever. (Laughs and gives Joey the thumbs up heading back to his apartment. Joey follows him)
Ross: Oh no-no-no, were just two people who happen to run into each other here at the coffee house. (He winks at her.)
Ross: Hey everybody!
Ross: (angrily) Ben! (Pause.) (Happily.) I mean, Ben! Ben!
Ross: Hey uh, this is Elizabeth.
Ross: Bye.
Ross: Well thanks!
Rachel: (starts to cry) Ross, please, I found the magazines!
Joey: Dahhhhh!! (Ross has a puzzled look on his face.) No! Noooo!! (Storms off.)
Ross: No, but it is frowned upon.
[Cut to Rosss second wedding reception, Joey has just told him the band is ready with Rachel looking on.]
Mrs. Geller: Here, sweetie, here. I took these when I had my golfing accident. (Hands Ross a bottle of pills. Then turns to Monica and pats her hair over her ears)
Ross: But, Elizabeth and I are-are both adults and so I dont think theres really anything you can do about it.
Ross: Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Were not 13 anymore.
Ross: Oh, okay. What-what about?
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa, ho, ho, ho, you did not win the game, the touchdown didnt count, because of the spectacularly illegal, oh and by the way savage nose breaking.
Ross: Oh-ooh!