words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Ross: She barely knows me. We just live in the same building.
Ross: She lent me an egg once.
Ross: Aw, right.
Woman: Hi, Ross.
Ross: Hey. (stutters something incoherent)
Chandler: Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbianI don't think we need a third...
Ross: An egg?
Ross: I think it's insane.
(Ross walks over to the woman, egg in hand.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Ross: Hi. She said yes.
Chandler: Yes! Way to go, man! (Chandler and Ross hug. Something crunches in Ross' shirt pocket.) Still got the egg, huh?
Monica: Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call.
Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously)
[Scene: A Chinese Restaurant, Ross is there with his date.]
Ross: I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.
(Ross starts to laugh, and then makes a face like 'Why did I just say that?' Ross' ex-wife, Carol, and her lesbian lover, Susan, enter the restaurant. Ross stares at them.)
Ross: The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close, personal friend.
Ross: If you wanna put a label on it.
Ross: Nope, nope, that's it.
Ross: Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo!
Ross: So, um, what do you do for a living?
Kristin: Well, um, for the past few years I've been working..(Ross is watching Carol and Susan, not listening to Kristin. Susan gets up, and has to go. Carol is left stranded)...which is funny because, that wasn't even my major.
Susan: I thought they could...I'll try to get back as soon as I can. I'm sorry. (Ross realizes Kristin was expecting him to laugh, so he starts to laugh hysterically.)
Ross: Now that is funny. Hey, do you think...would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 'Cause she's, she's alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad.
Ross: Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?
Ross: Come on. These people'll scooch down. You guys'll scooch, won't you? Let's try scooching! Come on. Come on. Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick. Carol, Kristin. Uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. And, Kristin, Kristin...(struggling)...does something that, funnily enough, wasn't even her major!
[Scene: The Chinese Restaurant, Ross and Carol are talking. Kristin is not there.]
Ross: You did so. I swear, I swear(noticing Kristin's absence) How long has she been in the bathroom?
Ross: Well maybe it's cold in there. Or maybe I screwed up the first date I had in 9 years.
Ross: Oh, god. (He puts his head down on the grill) You know, this is still pretty hot. (He picks his head up, and a mushroom sticks to his head. Carol picks it off and eats it.)
Ross: No, it's just...you know the whole "getting on with your life" thing. Well, do I have to? I mean, I'm sitting here with this cute woman, and, and, and she's perfectly nice, and, but that there's, that's it. And um, and then I'm here talkin' to you, and, and it's easy, and it's fun, and, and I don't, I don't have to...You know, here's a wacky thought. Um, what's say you and I give it another shot? No no no, I know what you're gonna say, you're a lesbian. But what do you say we just put that aside for now you know? Let's just stick a pin in it, ok? Because, we're great together, you know. You can't deny it. Besides, you're carrying my baby. I mean, how perfect is that? But see, you know, you keep sayin' that, but there's somethin' right here. I love you.
Ross: No but, no but.
Ross: That's easy for you to say, you found one already.
(A beautiful woman walks by Ross, he stares at her.)
Ross: Okay, that's, that's enough. (retreats to the bathroom)
[Scene: Joey's Apartment, Joey is reading a script as Ross and Chandler enter carrying a basketball.]
Ross: Yeah, but it didnt fit. Well, luckily theres a store here that has one left in her size, but Im the groom, Im not supposed to see the dress
Ross: (entering) Hey guys!
Ross: Thank you.
Ross: Whats wah-pah?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Chandler are talking.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Hey, do uh, do you have a minute?
ROSS: Uh, excuse me, uh, where can we find the monkey?
Ross: Oh, no, I didnt mean, uh
Ross: Oh. Yeah?
Ross: Right that's why I came over to talk about. Hum...I saw Rachel kissing some guy on your balcony,even though there were NO LIGHTS !
Ross: Uh-huh.
Ross: Wow, thats-thats-thats incredible.
Ross: Hey, yknow, yknow what would make me really happy?
Phoebe: So you do know who he is! (laughs, Ross stares at her) Sorry.
RACH: Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay with her and she's going to be all, "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to get married, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."
Ross: Marcel? Marcel? Okay, where is he? Where is he? Marcel? Marcel?
ROSS: It's just, it's, it's me. You, you know I've only been with one woman my whole life and she turned out to be a lesbian. So now I've got myself all psyched out, you know, and it's become, like this, this thing and I. . . Well, you just must think I'm weird.
JOEY: [opens the drapes] Hey, Ross! What are you doin'?
Ross: Hey man.
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Chandler and Monica are sitting on the couch. Phoebe and Mike enters.]
Ross: Yeah!
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yep!
Joey: Well Ross, it seems pretty clear. I mean whats more important? What people think or how you feel, huh? Ross, you gotta follow your heart.
Ross: Oh, just this woman that I met last night at the party.
Ross: Thats a good point. So uh, how long are you gonna punish him?
Ross: Really?! We are?
Ross: You know, I really don't want to get involved in you guy's relationship.
ROSS: Great, great, and I miss that too, I miss everything.
Ross: Oh yeah! Then how come you didnt get the Geller Cup?
Ross: No, I ran. It was really far, and when did people stop understanding the phrase, "Get the hell out of my way!"
Ross: Awwwahuh, no, no, no!!
Rachel: (getting of the elevator and noticing Ross) Hey!
Ross: Oh, thats not true! Ive got her lots of stuff she never took back.
Rachel: Well! Good night. (to Ross) Im going upstairs.
[Scene: The Freeman Building, Ross is entering his new class completely out of breath.]
Ross: How could you not get it? You were Santa last year.
ROSS: No, Rach, come on. Rach! Rach, no, no! She's not Rachel, she is, she is not, Ra--Rachel?
Rachel: But Ross, its you and me!
Ross: Oh, I don't know, they seem to have a shared interest in each other's tonsils...
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Rachel: Oh God... Okay. Alright. Alright. Okay. Ross, please don't hate me.
Ross: What happened?
Ross: Come here.
Ross: Noo. Why?
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: You okay?
Ross: Oh, Rachel, Im-Im sorry.
Ross: Women tell each other everything. Did you know that?
ROSS: You're livin' the dream.
Ross: Yowzah!!!
ROSS: (using calculator) Plus tip, divided by six. Ok, everyone owes 28 bucks.
Ross: Are you kidding? Okay, look. I-I studied evolution. Remember, evolution? Monkey into man? Plus, Im a doctor, and I had a monkey. Im Doctor Monkey!
Ross: It's, it's, it's, uh, a totally diferent situation! It's, it's apples and oranges, it's, it's orthodontists and lesbi- I gotta go.
Ross: No, no, we will. We just wont tell her she messed up.
Ross: I just wanted to thank you again for last night, what a great party! And the guys from work had a blast. Yknow, one of them had never been to a bachelor party before. Yeah! And-and another one had never been to a party before, so
Ross: Ouchy.
Chandler: No, it's... fancier than a pimple. Look Ross, why don't you just go see a
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Sure. Why not?
Ross: Yeah sure.
ROSS: So do you have like any nuclear weapons on board?
(The unvoiced hissing continues. In alarm, Ross and Chandler look at the monkey, who is now in some distress.)
Ross: Hi.
Ross: It'll be nice to get this off finally, won't it? Yes it will. (Marcel resists) Or we can leave it on for now, that's fine.
[Ross and Rachel hug.]
Ross: I do.
Ross: Yes, yes, that's right...
Rachel: Ohhh!!!! [looking at something behind Ross]
Ross: What? [the cat jumps on his shoulders] Ow!
Emily: Ohh, Ross, please!
Ross: Wait a minute, is it because Joey and I didnt invite him to that Knicks game a couple of weeks ago?
Rachel: (to Ross) Yes! Did you see that?
Ross: Come on you guys, we're sorry, alri...? Our subway broke down.
Ross: Good.
Rachel: Umm, okay, I think I'm-I'm just gonna-just gonna say it. Just gonna say it. Uhh, (pause) I'm still in love with you Ross.
Ross: People are doing it in front of my book!
Ross: Fine.
Rachel: Good. (Ross leaves)
Phoebe: Okay, scarfs done. (Its not really a scarf, its just a bunch of yarn that Phoebe has tied together. Just then, Ross and Emily enter dragging with them Joey and Chandler.)
Ross: Okay, its not, its not.
Ross: (yelling, thinking Emily can hear him through the answering machine all the way to New York.) I love you too! Im, Im gonna call you right now from the phone booth! (Realises) You cant hear me. (Goes to make his call.)
[Rachel and Ross go out in the hall]
Ross: Is this about Mark?
Ross: Yeah!
Rachel: Ross, it just wouldnt have been feasible.
Ross: Oh well yeah, actually I was going to talk to her when you guys all came in the room.
Ross: Yes, you can, very much.
Ross: No!!
Ross: What?
Rachel: Ross? Look, whatever this relationship stuff that Emily wants, just give it to her. Come on, the bottom line here is that you love her. So just fix whatever she wants fixed. Just do it. (The phone starts ringing.) I mean, you're gonna have to try. You'll just gonna hate yourself if you don't. (The phone keeps ringing.) Oh come on answer it! It's driving me crazy!
Ross: She, she was different.
Ross: She was...
Ross: What? Okay, okay, okay, okay.