words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Ross: She barely knows me. We just live in the same building.
Ross: She lent me an egg once.
Ross: Aw, right.
Woman: Hi, Ross.
Ross: Hey. (stutters something incoherent)
Chandler: Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbianI don't think we need a third...
Ross: An egg?
Ross: I think it's insane.
(Ross walks over to the woman, egg in hand.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Ross: Hi. She said yes.
Chandler: Yes! Way to go, man! (Chandler and Ross hug. Something crunches in Ross' shirt pocket.) Still got the egg, huh?
Monica: Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call.
Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously)
[Scene: A Chinese Restaurant, Ross is there with his date.]
Ross: I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.
(Ross starts to laugh, and then makes a face like 'Why did I just say that?' Ross' ex-wife, Carol, and her lesbian lover, Susan, enter the restaurant. Ross stares at them.)
Ross: The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close, personal friend.
Ross: If you wanna put a label on it.
Ross: Nope, nope, that's it.
Ross: Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo!
Ross: So, um, what do you do for a living?
Kristin: Well, um, for the past few years I've been working..(Ross is watching Carol and Susan, not listening to Kristin. Susan gets up, and has to go. Carol is left stranded)...which is funny because, that wasn't even my major.
Susan: I thought they could...I'll try to get back as soon as I can. I'm sorry. (Ross realizes Kristin was expecting him to laugh, so he starts to laugh hysterically.)
Ross: Now that is funny. Hey, do you think...would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 'Cause she's, she's alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad.
Ross: Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?
Ross: Come on. These people'll scooch down. You guys'll scooch, won't you? Let's try scooching! Come on. Come on. Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick. Carol, Kristin. Uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. And, Kristin, Kristin...(struggling)...does something that, funnily enough, wasn't even her major!
[Scene: The Chinese Restaurant, Ross and Carol are talking. Kristin is not there.]
Ross: You did so. I swear, I swear(noticing Kristin's absence) How long has she been in the bathroom?
Ross: Well maybe it's cold in there. Or maybe I screwed up the first date I had in 9 years.
Ross: Oh, god. (He puts his head down on the grill) You know, this is still pretty hot. (He picks his head up, and a mushroom sticks to his head. Carol picks it off and eats it.)
Ross: No, it's just...you know the whole "getting on with your life" thing. Well, do I have to? I mean, I'm sitting here with this cute woman, and, and, and she's perfectly nice, and, but that there's, that's it. And um, and then I'm here talkin' to you, and, and it's easy, and it's fun, and, and I don't, I don't have to...You know, here's a wacky thought. Um, what's say you and I give it another shot? No no no, I know what you're gonna say, you're a lesbian. But what do you say we just put that aside for now you know? Let's just stick a pin in it, ok? Because, we're great together, you know. You can't deny it. Besides, you're carrying my baby. I mean, how perfect is that? But see, you know, you keep sayin' that, but there's somethin' right here. I love you.
Ross: No but, no but.
Ross: That's easy for you to say, you found one already.
(A beautiful woman walks by Ross, he stares at her.)
Rachel: How's Ross doing? Y'know since all the Emily stuff.
ROSS: Scotch. Alright, I'll be back in 10 seconds with your scotch on the rocks in a glass.
Joey: Ross?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is trying to tell Rachel about Emily's ultimatum again.]
Ross: Pretty cool, huh?
(There's another pause as Ross gets angry again.)
PHOEBE: What? Is it - is this 'cause of what Ross said?
(Ross takes his suitcase and tries to get out but ends up falling on Prof. Sherman's laps, thereby waking him up)
Monica: Yeah. But of course we had to update it a little bit. (To Ross) Hey, by the way, great thinking about catching me!
Ross: Oh my God its just like I dreamed it!
Ross: I just, I hate this so much! I mean, every time I go pick her up at the airport, its-its so great. But at the same time Im thinking, "Well, Im gonna be right back there in a couple of days, dropping her off."
Ross: It would be so cool to live across from you guys!
Ross: Oh, come on, now you know you want em.
Ross: Let me ask you something, at your school was there a like uh a place on campus where students went to uh, fool around.
Ross: Umm (Rachel blows her nose.)
ROSS: Ohh. . . Thanks Rach, goodnight. [goes back in apartment]
Ross: (To Chandler) How about you?
Ross: You have no idea what a nightmare this has been. This is so hard.
Ross: But the good news is, no one in a two-block radius will ever know.
Ross: Oh no-no-no, it's my pleasure.
Chandler: About Ross!
ROSS: Rach, come on, open up. Rach, come on, come on, Rach. You got to give me another chance.
Joey: Cut it out Ross! I hate to have to save your life and kick your ass in the same day!
Ross: I'll take sports.
Ross: That was going to be my next argument.
Ross: It's just a fur ball.
Chandler: (entering) All right! Okay! I think I am making some progress with Joey, when I went into the apartment he went straight into his bedroom but he only slammed the door once! (Ross is pleased.) I mean yeah, he gave me the finger while doing it.
ROSS: OK sweetie, I'll see you later.
ROSS: It was ridiculous. Ya know, these guys, they were bullies, actual bullies, ya know. We're grown ups, this kinda stuff isn't supposed to happen anymore.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe enters to see Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel tearfully watching TV.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, and Chandler are there.]
Carol: (entering from the kitchen) Hey Ross!
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Why are they here?
Ross: Well, they're not mine!
Amy: H-Hi!!(to Ross) And you are...?
Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel: (turning to look at Joey) Ewwww!!
Ross: Well I-I-I, that kind of thing requires some serious thought. First, Ill divide my perspective canidates into catergories....
Ross: Well, I still think I was right about that whole Mark thing.
ROSS: No, no way. You've got it totally the other way around my friend. John Voit was...
(Phoebe mocks what Monica just said. Ross pulls Chandler aside.)
Ross: (entering, depressed) Hi.
Ross: Alright, you know what? You're right. I should at least tell her how I feel.
Ross: (quietly) That-that would be incredible. Thank you so much. I-I still can't believe someone ate it!! I mean, look, I left a note and everything.
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Ross are returning from working out.]
Ross: No, I-I-Im serious, okay? I mean, think about it. You move in, you start fighting over stupid game rooms, next thing yknow you break up!
Ross: (entering) Phoebe!
Ross: All right. Uhh, international.
Joey: Leetch spots Messier in the crease- there's the pass! (He kicks it to Ross, but Ross is staring into a shop window.)
Chandler: You got a man who's a nanny...? You got a manny...? (Monica starts laughing, but very exaggerated. Joey realises they also should laugh and punches Ross. Now all three of them laugh, but very fake. Chandler seems happy again.)
Ross: Well, but aren't you pissed at him?! I mean this guy abandoned you! I gotta tell you if this were me, this guy would be in some serious physical danger! (Getting worked up) I mean I-I-I'd walk in there and I'd be like, "Yo, dad! You and me outside right now!" (Calming down.) I kinda scared myself.
[Rachel comes out of her apartment, followed by Mark, and they leave on their date, without saying a word to Ross. Ross is stunned.]
Joey: Ohh, you're upset because you think I chose Ross over you! No! I knew you could take care of yourself. Y'know, I mean Ross, he need help. He's not street like us!
Ross: What?!
Ross: (tightening his tie) And so do I.
Ross: (Proudly) Yeah.
Ross: What?
Ross: You ate my sandwich?
Ross: Wow. Umm Huh I'm-I'm not sure what to do with that right now.
Ross: After one class? I dont think so.
Quartet: Your loyal loving boyfriend Ross..... Ross!
Monica: Ross, you were right before, it was just a stupid fight about a room.
Chandler: Ross?
Monica: Ross, are you okay?
(Phoebe tries to throw some quarters out the window, but she has forgotten to open the window, and she and Ross scream.)
Ross: Practical jokes.
Ross: (on phone) Uh, hello dad! Monica and I just saw the house in the paper! (Listens) Yes were surprised! (Listens) Who did you leave a message with?
Ross: Pheebs, did you want a cookie?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler are sitting at a table. Rachel is working. Monica and Phoebe enter.]
Rachel: Look! (Shows Ross the picture.)
Ross: You slept with my sister?
Ross: Yeah, what's going on?
Joey: They're so small! (Both he and Ross look at them with satisfied looks on their faces.)
Ross: I can't believe Chandler is missing this!
Ross: My God Monica!!
Ross: I love you. (goes to kiss her and she turns away.)
[The next one is from Episode 712: The One Where Theyre Up All Night, Joey and Ross are deciding how to climb down the final part of the fire escape.]
Rachel: (entering) Forgot my purse! (Sees them kissing.) Oh, you guys made up. (To Mona) Hes a good kisser isnt he? (Ross goes to close the door on her.) Im going! (Quickly leaves and Ross locks the door.)
Ross: Oh no, not yet.
Chandler: No, you kidding? The guy's a freak.. (Ross enters off camera)
Ross: Mmm-Unmm.
Ross: So what, we just sit?
Ross: You have a line down your face.
[Scene: Flight 1066 to Athens, Rachel is ordering a drink for Ross and herself.]
RACHEL: Hi. [Ross turns to Rachel and they hug]
Parker: (laughs) Classic Ross. Rachel, Rachel, oh how you glow. May I? (Puts hand on her stomach)
Phoebe: (answering the phone) (whispering) Ross, thank God.
Ross: The guy who took Rachel to the prom? Why is he calling you?
[Scene: Hallway, Ross and Rachel are returning from dinner.]
Ross: Or that.
Ross: Yeah!
Ross: And it can't be Joey.
Ross: Or Joseph.
Rachel: All right. Look. Gavin...I...I guess I felt guilty that you were here, which I shouldn't. You know Ross and I are not inany relationship but...he is the father of my child, and you know we do live together and plus there is just so muchhistory...you know it's just...I don't know, I'm sorry, I'm just all over the place.
Ross: Yeah. Look, you don't, you don't talk about like, you know, your girlfriend and the intimate stuff you, you do with her.
Monica: Ross didnt scare you?
Ross: No seriously. I have job security for life. You know, I never have to worry. (Rachel starts crying) Oh, look at you. Look how happy you are for me.
Ross: Oh.. you don't get it! (Passes out and slumps across her)
Ross: Oh-oh, yeah.
Ross: Yeah.