words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Ross: She barely knows me. We just live in the same building.
Ross: She lent me an egg once.
Ross: Aw, right.
Woman: Hi, Ross.
Ross: Hey. (stutters something incoherent)
Chandler: Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbianI don't think we need a third...
Ross: An egg?
Ross: I think it's insane.
(Ross walks over to the woman, egg in hand.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Ross: Hi. She said yes.
Chandler: Yes! Way to go, man! (Chandler and Ross hug. Something crunches in Ross' shirt pocket.) Still got the egg, huh?
Monica: Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call.
Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously)
[Scene: A Chinese Restaurant, Ross is there with his date.]
Ross: I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.
(Ross starts to laugh, and then makes a face like 'Why did I just say that?' Ross' ex-wife, Carol, and her lesbian lover, Susan, enter the restaurant. Ross stares at them.)
Ross: The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close, personal friend.
Ross: If you wanna put a label on it.
Ross: Nope, nope, that's it.
Ross: Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo!
Ross: So, um, what do you do for a living?
Kristin: Well, um, for the past few years I've been working..(Ross is watching Carol and Susan, not listening to Kristin. Susan gets up, and has to go. Carol is left stranded)...which is funny because, that wasn't even my major.
Susan: I thought they could...I'll try to get back as soon as I can. I'm sorry. (Ross realizes Kristin was expecting him to laugh, so he starts to laugh hysterically.)
Ross: Now that is funny. Hey, do you think...would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 'Cause she's, she's alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad.
Ross: Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?
Ross: Come on. These people'll scooch down. You guys'll scooch, won't you? Let's try scooching! Come on. Come on. Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick. Carol, Kristin. Uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. And, Kristin, Kristin...(struggling)...does something that, funnily enough, wasn't even her major!
[Scene: The Chinese Restaurant, Ross and Carol are talking. Kristin is not there.]
Ross: You did so. I swear, I swear(noticing Kristin's absence) How long has she been in the bathroom?
Ross: Well maybe it's cold in there. Or maybe I screwed up the first date I had in 9 years.
Ross: Oh, god. (He puts his head down on the grill) You know, this is still pretty hot. (He picks his head up, and a mushroom sticks to his head. Carol picks it off and eats it.)
Ross: No, it's just...you know the whole "getting on with your life" thing. Well, do I have to? I mean, I'm sitting here with this cute woman, and, and, and she's perfectly nice, and, but that there's, that's it. And um, and then I'm here talkin' to you, and, and it's easy, and it's fun, and, and I don't, I don't have to...You know, here's a wacky thought. Um, what's say you and I give it another shot? No no no, I know what you're gonna say, you're a lesbian. But what do you say we just put that aside for now you know? Let's just stick a pin in it, ok? Because, we're great together, you know. You can't deny it. Besides, you're carrying my baby. I mean, how perfect is that? But see, you know, you keep sayin' that, but there's somethin' right here. I love you.
Ross: No but, no but.
Ross: That's easy for you to say, you found one already.
(A beautiful woman walks by Ross, he stares at her.)
Monica: Mom and dad just sent me in here to find out if you (points to Chandler) were trying to get Ross stoned!
Joey: Hey so wheres Ross?
Monica: (to Ross) Honey, its not pushy, he gave her his home number.
Ross: In the closet.
Ross: (enters from the bed room) Okay I put most of the stuff away.
Ross: Will, high school was-was a long time ago.
Ross: Sure what kind?
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Phoebe, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are watching Emma sleep.]
Ross: Linen closet.
Rachel: Ross, you guys went out once. You took your kids to Chucky Cheese, and you didn't even kiss her.
Amy: Seriously? Its.. its just these rooms? <moves hands around motioning 'just these rooms'> <To Ross> I thought you were a doctor.
Mr. Geller: Boy, bad time to say the wrong name, huh Ross?
Ross: Yep.
Ross: Yep, can you believe it?
Ross: Huh? Ooh (laughs) you mean like a Huh?
Ross: Phoebe, you cant force kids to be friends.
Ross: Im gonna go.
Ross: Actually that-thats not true, in The Incredible Hulk uh, No. 72, Dr. Bruce Banner found (Sees everyone staring at him and stops.) Yknow, ugh, nevermind, my girlfriends a lesbian. (Leaves.)
Ross: (turns back) What! (Angrily) You didnt do anything wrong?!
Ross: Joey!
Ross: No I dont.
Ross: No.
Ross: Well we we dont have a garage.
Ross: Give me the bag.
Ross: Not using it right, Joe.
Ross: No!
Ross: No!
[Scene: The Baby Furniture Store, Ross and Rachel are checking out.]
Ross: Give me the bag.
Ross: Give me the bag.
Ross: Oh my god, this really hurts!!!
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Emma is still crying.]
Ross: Joey, give me the bag.
Ross: What is the matter with you?!?
Ross: Why dont we talk about this on the way to the hospital?
Chandler: (sarcastically shocked) Really?! Joe? What would you do if you were in Rosss situation?
Ross: Oh! Oh! Shes upside down but shes coming! Shes coming!
Ross: Just Ross!
Ross: Oh, I'm so excited, I mean, apparently I beat out hundreds of other applicants, included five guys I went to graduate school with. Not that I'm keeping score or anything... five!
Ross: You know my birthday.
Ross: I broke my thumb.
[The next one is from Episode 608: The One With Rosss Teeth, Chandler is accusing Joey of becoming less of a man.]
Ross: October 18th.
Ross: Ah, Rachel I guess.
Ross: I dont think that we are.
Ross: Well, I thought so too, but then she said shed marry you.
Ross: Just ah just put roommate.
Ross: Yeah thats what she said.
Ross: Yeah.
(Ross looks away, not bothering)
Ross: Hey there you go! (Smiles because Joey used it correctly)
Ross: Well, we believe it originated here. (He uses a pointer and points to the point of origin.) In the Aroma Room.
Ross: So apparently Im available for lunch.
Joey: Two it is. Ross, how about you?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are telling Joey, Rachel, and Monica of their bank woes.]
[Scene: A Street, Ross is walking past a newsstand and sees Rachel.]
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Ross enters.]
Ross: Hey.
Ross: Okay.
Ross: (smiles) Right.
Ross: What, Rach?
(Suddenly Ross jumps up from behind the counter armed with a plastic gun. By the way, hes overacting too.)
(Ross and Rachel enter)
Ross: Oh my God!
Ross: I went thru this with Ben and Carol. One cup of coffee won't affect your milk.
Ross: Not you.
Ross: Monday?!
Ross: Just three?! Im dilated three!
Ross: Rachel, I can see you dialing! I don't understand why...
Ross: Well, I tell you what. Why dont we uh, why dont we just stay here? Lets not see a movie, well just hang.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment]
Ross: Blueberry it is.
Ross: Carol our sex life isits just not working
Ross: Well, what was it?
Ross: (Enters from his bedroom)Who the hell was that?!
[Time lapse, Ross and Joey are eating Rachels disaster.]
Ross: Was there anything you did wrong with Emma?
Ross: (Comes back into the living room) Rachel!!!
Ross: Yeah, Im gonna go to a doctor who went to school in a mini-mall.
Joey: Priesthood! Look Ross, I'm telling you, she has no idea what you're thinking. If you don't ask her out soon you're going to end up stuck in the zone forever.
Rachel: Ross said he died.
Ross: Okay, look, I-I know what you guys are going to say
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah, yknow you and Ross are still married.
Ross: Ok, well, uh, I can maybe grab a sleeping bag, or...(There's one of those moments. They're staring at each other, no word uttered, and then she leans toward him in order to kiss him, but he ducks and avoids her more than once.) Oh, oh. (he then hugs her and when she tries to kiss him again, he stands up and she falls down on the bed). No, Rach! I'm sorry, I just don't think this, this, this is a good idea.
Ross: Thanks doctor.
Ross: No! No no, it is nothing like me and Carol!
Ross: Yeah! Yes! Thank you! This is great. Thank you so much. And I swear, your kid is going to have the time of his life.
Ross: Okay, okay. Ooooh, ooh maybe I rode in on a Harley.
Ross: (to Charlie) So, eh... it's probably gonna be hard for you to leave Boston, huh?
Ross: Hey!
Ross: You don't have to do anything. It will just be easier if it is the two of us, like college, remember? You...you break theice with some kind of jokes so that they know you're the funny one and I swoop in with some interesting conversation, sothey'll see that I'm the brilliant, brooding, sexy one...
Ross: You promised you wouldn't say anything.
(Ross and Rachel enter with Emma.)
Ross: Monica, come on now. Let's go, baby coming.
Ross: Oh, (door is locked) holy molly are we in a pickle now.
Ross: It didn't spend much time on the wall!!!
Phoebe: I am shocked! Shocked!! (She storms off leaving Ross to defend himself from the angry looks from onlookers.)
Ross: Yeah, that's how I know. I'm Ross by the way.
Ross: Oh man.
Ross: I am a single parent.