words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Ross: She barely knows me. We just live in the same building.
Ross: She lent me an egg once.
Ross: Aw, right.
Woman: Hi, Ross.
Ross: Hey. (stutters something incoherent)
Chandler: Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbianI don't think we need a third...
Ross: An egg?
Ross: I think it's insane.
(Ross walks over to the woman, egg in hand.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Ross: Hi. She said yes.
Chandler: Yes! Way to go, man! (Chandler and Ross hug. Something crunches in Ross' shirt pocket.) Still got the egg, huh?
Monica: Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call.
Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously)
[Scene: A Chinese Restaurant, Ross is there with his date.]
Ross: I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.
(Ross starts to laugh, and then makes a face like 'Why did I just say that?' Ross' ex-wife, Carol, and her lesbian lover, Susan, enter the restaurant. Ross stares at them.)
Ross: The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close, personal friend.
Ross: If you wanna put a label on it.
Ross: Nope, nope, that's it.
Ross: Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo!
Ross: So, um, what do you do for a living?
Kristin: Well, um, for the past few years I've been working..(Ross is watching Carol and Susan, not listening to Kristin. Susan gets up, and has to go. Carol is left stranded)...which is funny because, that wasn't even my major.
Susan: I thought they could...I'll try to get back as soon as I can. I'm sorry. (Ross realizes Kristin was expecting him to laugh, so he starts to laugh hysterically.)
Ross: Now that is funny. Hey, do you think...would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 'Cause she's, she's alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad.
Ross: Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?
Ross: Come on. These people'll scooch down. You guys'll scooch, won't you? Let's try scooching! Come on. Come on. Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick. Carol, Kristin. Uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. And, Kristin, Kristin...(struggling)...does something that, funnily enough, wasn't even her major!
[Scene: The Chinese Restaurant, Ross and Carol are talking. Kristin is not there.]
Ross: You did so. I swear, I swear(noticing Kristin's absence) How long has she been in the bathroom?
Ross: Well maybe it's cold in there. Or maybe I screwed up the first date I had in 9 years.
Ross: Oh, god. (He puts his head down on the grill) You know, this is still pretty hot. (He picks his head up, and a mushroom sticks to his head. Carol picks it off and eats it.)
Ross: No, it's just...you know the whole "getting on with your life" thing. Well, do I have to? I mean, I'm sitting here with this cute woman, and, and, and she's perfectly nice, and, but that there's, that's it. And um, and then I'm here talkin' to you, and, and it's easy, and it's fun, and, and I don't, I don't have to...You know, here's a wacky thought. Um, what's say you and I give it another shot? No no no, I know what you're gonna say, you're a lesbian. But what do you say we just put that aside for now you know? Let's just stick a pin in it, ok? Because, we're great together, you know. You can't deny it. Besides, you're carrying my baby. I mean, how perfect is that? But see, you know, you keep sayin' that, but there's somethin' right here. I love you.
Ross: No but, no but.
Ross: That's easy for you to say, you found one already.
(A beautiful woman walks by Ross, he stares at her.)
Amy turns around to Phoebe: Emma, Ross wants you.
Ross: Thats it. Thats it.
Amy turns to Ross and Rachel: Why does she keep making that noise?
Ross: The nurse said theyre bringing in another woman.
Ross: (on tape) I know. Hey remember remember the night they got engaged? How uh, you and I almost
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Chandler and Monica are holding the twins. Joey and Phoebe are sitting by the window, while Ross and Rachel are standing together. The apartment is completely empty. Two men are carrying a large dresser.]
[Scene: Rosss apartment, he and Emily are addressing their invitations.]
ROSS: [looking at a glass table with a panther shaped base] Look, check this out. Is it a coffee table, is it a panther? There's no need to decide.
Ross: No, I-I thought it would be more fun this way.
Ross: Uh Rach
Ross: (in a high pitched voice) Monica!
Ross: (To Rachel) Squeeze your legs together and cover the babys ears!
Ross: And yet somehow its true!
(Ross shrugs his shoulders to Rachel and Sick Bastard closes the screen all the way.)
Ross: (softly) Really?
Ross: Oh there you go!
Ross: (running up) Hey! Sorry I kept you waiting so long.
Ross: No-no. We
Ross: Sid you lucky deaf bastard.
Ross: Hey!
[Ross looks at Joey coyly.]
MIKE: I'll get it.� (He lunges across Ross's lap on the sofa to reach the phone.� Ross stares at him with wide eyes.)� Hello?� Ross's place.� Mike speaking.� (pause.� Hands phone to Ross)� It's for you.
Joey: Hey, dont get religious on me, ok. (Ross looks a little confused.) A guy in your position needs to be a little better at relaxing. You know. Why do you think we have the comfortable chairs? Huh...come here sit down. (Ross sits down.) Ready? (Joey flips the foot rest up.) Ahh!! (He reclines the chair fully.) Ohh, yeah!! Huh?!
Ross: He does not look happy.
Ross: It was the chair again! Okay? Im not doing it! It whatlook, I dontyknow whateh-eh (He walks away and goes over to Mona.) Hi.
Ross: What? Of course you can! Hop on!
Ross: Yeah, you didnt expect her to live there with a baby did you?
Chandler: Man, if only youd gotten here sooner. (Ross turns and glares at him.)
Ross: What is that?
Ross: Go!
Joey: Hey and look he brought flowers. Thanks Ross, but Im really more of a candy guy. (Laughs.)
Ross: Sweetie youre doing great.
Ross: Maybe its uh Sergeant Sagittarius coming back to flirt some more! (They pull over.)
Chandler: And I think Ross is generous too.
Ross: Yes you can!
Ross: Uh actually, I sent the flowers before the actual date. So techincally, technically I didnt break any rules. Thanks for stopping by though.
Ross: Oh shes shes perfect.
Ross: Oh! Oh my God oh! Oh my God shes here.
Ross: Oh, come in.
(Everyone except Ross and Rachel leave.)
Ross: No, no, really. You should go. Just go! Go! Go out! Really, the world is your oyster. Kick up the heels. Paint the town red. (Slang right?)
Joey: What was the other one Ross?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are trying the home remedies again.]
Ross: Oh! No-n-
Ross: True, but youre allowed to be unreasonable. Youre having our baby.
Ross: (entering) Hey Janice!
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Huh?
Ross: No-no. No.
Ross: Man! Did you see the kid on that nose?
Ross: Look at Emma!
Ross: Yeah. Shes putting her down now, thats her. (Points to the nurse putting Emma now.)
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Ross: Its its complicated okay?
Ross: Yeah, exactly.
Ross: Yeah! I dont know. I mean, last year Elizabeth now-now this kid. What-what-what-what is it?! Am I giving out some kind of sexy professor vibe? (Rachel and Joey both look at him.)
Joey: What are you talking about alone? What about Ross?
Ross: Uh Joey, can you give us just a minute?
Ross: Hey Joey. (To Rachel) Hey you.
Ross: What?
Ross: Hey, wheres uh, wheres mom?
Ross: What about Ben?
Ross: No, come on dont start. (they start kissing again) Ouch!
Ross: Yeah right.
Ross: Can I get some of that action?
Chandler: Does Ross know?
[Scene: The Anniversary Party, Ross and Rachel are arriving and see his parents.]
Mr Zelner: (looks at Ross, for a long moment, confused) I meant with my son.
(Rachel looks at Ross and gets his approval.)
Phoebe: Especially Ross!
Rachel: Really?! Even Ross?
(Ross turns to look at Joey.)
Ross: No!
Ross: Aww that is so cool.
Ross: Dad, what are you doing?
[Cut to the hallway outside the room, Ross is going to see which table hes at and sees a beautiful woman doing the same thing.]
Ross: Hi!
Ross: What?
Ross starts playing with a plate: Woah. Woah... <nearly really drops the plate and more seriously> Woah.
Ross: No!
Ross: Yes!
Ross: No!
Ross: No!!
Ross: Its mine.
Ross: Well we haven't offically asked them yet, but we would want Monica and Chandler.
Ross: And-and I, and I saw that Joey was about to go in, so I ran in ahead of him to-to surprise him and, and then I pretended I didnt know he was in there. (They all kinda look at him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Gunther is behind the counter as Ross enters looking for Chandler.]
Ross: No!! No!! I wanna stay. I wanna talk about this.
Chandler: Go and tell Rachel right now before Ross finds out.
Ross: Hey.
Ross: I dont think you do.
[Scene: Rachels Room, Ross is entering.]
Ross: Joey proposed to you?
Ross: Then what did happen?
Ross: What?!
[Scene: The church where Ross and Emily are to be married. Judy, Andrea, and Monica enter together.]
Ross: No, you didnt!
Ross: What happened to the Disgustingtons?
Ross: What?
Ross: Good weird?