words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Ross: She barely knows me. We just live in the same building.
Ross: She lent me an egg once.
Ross: Aw, right.
Woman: Hi, Ross.
Ross: Hey. (stutters something incoherent)
Chandler: Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbianI don't think we need a third...
Ross: An egg?
Ross: I think it's insane.
(Ross walks over to the woman, egg in hand.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Ross: Hi. She said yes.
Chandler: Yes! Way to go, man! (Chandler and Ross hug. Something crunches in Ross' shirt pocket.) Still got the egg, huh?
Monica: Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call.
Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously)
[Scene: A Chinese Restaurant, Ross is there with his date.]
Ross: I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.
(Ross starts to laugh, and then makes a face like 'Why did I just say that?' Ross' ex-wife, Carol, and her lesbian lover, Susan, enter the restaurant. Ross stares at them.)
Ross: The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close, personal friend.
Ross: If you wanna put a label on it.
Ross: Nope, nope, that's it.
Ross: Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo!
Ross: So, um, what do you do for a living?
Kristin: Well, um, for the past few years I've been working..(Ross is watching Carol and Susan, not listening to Kristin. Susan gets up, and has to go. Carol is left stranded)...which is funny because, that wasn't even my major.
Susan: I thought they could...I'll try to get back as soon as I can. I'm sorry. (Ross realizes Kristin was expecting him to laugh, so he starts to laugh hysterically.)
Ross: Now that is funny. Hey, do you think...would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 'Cause she's, she's alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad.
Ross: Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?
Ross: Come on. These people'll scooch down. You guys'll scooch, won't you? Let's try scooching! Come on. Come on. Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick. Carol, Kristin. Uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. And, Kristin, Kristin...(struggling)...does something that, funnily enough, wasn't even her major!
[Scene: The Chinese Restaurant, Ross and Carol are talking. Kristin is not there.]
Ross: You did so. I swear, I swear(noticing Kristin's absence) How long has she been in the bathroom?
Ross: Well maybe it's cold in there. Or maybe I screwed up the first date I had in 9 years.
Ross: Oh, god. (He puts his head down on the grill) You know, this is still pretty hot. (He picks his head up, and a mushroom sticks to his head. Carol picks it off and eats it.)
Ross: No, it's just...you know the whole "getting on with your life" thing. Well, do I have to? I mean, I'm sitting here with this cute woman, and, and, and she's perfectly nice, and, but that there's, that's it. And um, and then I'm here talkin' to you, and, and it's easy, and it's fun, and, and I don't, I don't have to...You know, here's a wacky thought. Um, what's say you and I give it another shot? No no no, I know what you're gonna say, you're a lesbian. But what do you say we just put that aside for now you know? Let's just stick a pin in it, ok? Because, we're great together, you know. You can't deny it. Besides, you're carrying my baby. I mean, how perfect is that? But see, you know, you keep sayin' that, but there's somethin' right here. I love you.
Ross: No but, no but.
Ross: That's easy for you to say, you found one already.
(A beautiful woman walks by Ross, he stares at her.)
Ross: (seeing the thumbs up) Ahhhh!! (Hugs Rachel tighter.)
(Ross looks annoyed hearing that even Dirk's character won a Nobel prize)
Rachel: Oh Ross, come on! You just did what you had to do.
Ross: So, what? That's it?
Ross: Rach, Rach, I am so sorry. I am so-so sorry.
Ross: Oh, thanks. Oh, you're the best. (They hug.)
Rachel: Ross, that was a Halloween costume, unless you would like me to go to this thing as Little Bo Peep.
Monica: Ross, if you dont tell them, then I will!
Ross: Well, I-I gotta go break up with Bonnie.
Ross: Oh... (to the others) Little heads-up would have been nice.
Ross: Hey, hey, hey, that's not the rule and you know it.
Ross: Hey-hey, its valid okay? And Im not the only one who thinks so, Monica agrees with me.
Ross: Hi.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is entering.]
Joey: Ross, you're mayor of the zone.
ROSS: Doctor Burke is sexy?
Ross: What thing?
Ross: So-so come! Why dont you come?
Ross: Joeys asking if youve just ruined the first book hes ever loved that didnt star Jack Nicholson?
Ross: Filming Rachel is not something I planned. Okay look, heres what happened, and Joey you-you can back me up on this. All right, about-about a month and a half ago I came to you with a problem? Umm, a personal thing.
[Scene: The next morning on the street. Ross is dancing along, Singing in the Rain is playing. Two old ladies are sitting on a bench.]
Ross: So Im thinking about asking Rachel out tonight. Y'know maybe play her that song we wrote last week.
Ross: Hey everybody, Pheebs is here!
[Scene: The hotel, Rosss room, Emily is entering.]
Ross: Wait! It was my plan.
[Scene: Elizabeths Dorm Room, Ross is walking up to her door and knocks on it. Suddenly the door opens and Elizabeth drags him into the room.]
Ross: The paper.
Ross: Yeah.
(Ross is stunned.)
Ross: Go ahead.
Ross: Yeah, and-and it's not that we don't like the comedian, it's that-that... that's not why we bought the ticket.
Ross: I like it, and Emily likes it, and thats what counts. So uh, how are you guys doing?
Charlie: (talking to Ross) I feel like I owe you an explanation. I don't ordinarily go around kissing guys at parties. I'm... well, I'm kind of embarrassed. I really hope you don't think less of me.
Phoebe: Hey! Hey, did you get your invitation to Rosss wedding?
Ross: Why are you laughing?
Ross: Yeah.
Chandler: (to Ross) Na ha ha... (to Chappy) Ne he he... (Ross moves Chappy to Chandler, who quickly backs away) Ah ah...
Ross: Why should Ben step aside? It was his audition in the first place! You-you just tagged along! You're like the uh, tag-a-long dad.
Ross: That is what the thing is.
[Scene: Rosss apartment, Emily has packed as Ross returns.]
Ross: Well, y'know, monogamy can be a, uh, tricky concept. I mean, anthropologically speaking-
Ross: Uh, no, its-its just this person.
Ross: Okay, let's go!
Ross: No thank you for Thank you.
Ross: Juice, I need...
Carol: Ross? That opens my cervix. (He drops it in horror.)
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Ross: It's all right.
Ross: (trying to make his disgust into lust) Ah, Cheryl!
Ross: Correct. In what part of her body did Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14?
Ross: Im giving this lecture on erosion theories tomorrow night, I think you should come.
Ross: Hello.
Rachel: Ugh! Get out! Get out! Go! Come on! (Ross gets up and heads for the kitchen.) No! Not in there! Hes in there! (She points Ross to the door next to the kitchen.)
[Ross gets up, pleased with himself and starts to walk past Joey.]
Ross: Hey, where are Monica and Rachel anyway?
Ross: All right, it's cool you can stay here. My parents won't mind.
Ross: Again, it's not that he
Ross: She's gonna be a scientist! (kisses Rachel on the head, very moved)
Ross: Look, I didn't recognize it without that inflatable sheep.
Chandler: (to Ross) Maybe you do that next time you get married!
Ross: And Im sure youre gonna make a big impression. Hi! Im Rachel Green. Its nice to meet you. (He lifts his leg and imitates shaking hands with it, just like how Rachel was trying to pick up the aspirin with her feet.) Come on, you probably have a broken rib!
Phoebe: Yeah, that does make sense. Ok, now, would... would you two (points to Ross and Chandler) like that?
Ross: Breathe! Breathe! Breathe throw the pain.
Ross: Argh!
Ross: So! Poetry? Susans gay! Theyre being gay together!
Ross: I do too! I do too!
Ross: Hey!
Leader: Hi. And batting for Sarah, Ross Geller, 872. Although, it looks like you bought an awful lot of cookies yourself.
Ross: (feeling the fabric) Wow, this is really soft (he looks the price). Three hundred and fifty dollars?
[Cut to Joey's room, his doctor and Ross are there.]
Ross: Oh, you-youre-youre one to talk.
ROSS: That was 14 hours ago.
Ross: You did it, man.
Joey: From now on, its gonna be Joey and Ross, best friends. (They shake hands.) Okay! Were gonna be the new Joey and Chandler.
Ross: What?! (Checks his hair.) Give-give me a brush.
Joey: Yeah? Well look Ross, you don't have to. Okay? It's not your fault I suck. I mean what kind of an actor can't even say, "Hmm, noodle soup." (Nods his head in disgust.)
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Ross are entering.]
[Scene: A street, Ross and Emily are walking home from a date.]
Joey: Okay, you picked the Gimmie card! You get all of Rosss points!
(They all go pack except for Ross.)
Joey: Ross! Way to suck up to the family.
Ross: Hate him? I No, I dont hate him. (Pause) Its just its Rachel, yknow?
Ross: (to the gang, whispering) She's talking.
Ross: (on phone) Hello.
ROSS: Doubtful.
Ross: In London!
Ross: (entering) Hi!
Ross: Whoa, hello, did you just meet Monica?
Ross: She wants me to move to London.
Ross: It could happen.
Ross: We have got to start locking that door!
Ross: Yes, tell me.
Ross: I know. I am, I am so sorry.
Ross: Again, very sorry.
Ross: Emily, there is nothing between Rachel and me. Okay? I love you.
Ross: Oh that is so great! That's
Rachel: Hi! Oh, Ross, dont forget, we have that doctors appointment tomorrow!
Ross: I can't believe you let George Michael slap you.
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachels father. Look I I made a mistake, but its only because I really, really like you. Really!