words in movies
(She hands the baby to Joey who pulls down the blanket to reveal Rosss face where the babys should be.)
Ross: (crying) I hope youre a better father than youre a friend!! (Cries again and Joey wakes up in horror.)
Phoebe: It does! How would you feel if you couldnt share your cooking? Or-or imagine how Ross would feel if he couldnt teach us about dragons.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: Hey!
Joey: Hey Ross! The babys kicking!
Ross: What?! It is?! (He tries to quickly remove his gloves, but runs into trouble and finally throws them off of his hands like a hockey player in a fight and grabs Rachels belly.)
Ross: Hey, when-when was it kicking? What happened?
Ross: My God, the babys kicking. Thats great. Although I kinda wish I-I wouldve been there to feel the kicking for the first time yknow.
Ross: Look, I-I dont want to miss anymore baby stuff. So Here. Heres my new pager number, okay? Anytime anything pregnancy related happens use it! Ill be there! Okay? I dont care if its three in the morning and all you want is ice cream.
Joey: Absolutely. But, were gonna stop by the hospital just to be sure, okay? Ill page Ross on the way. Come on.
Joey: (seeing Ross) Oh hey-hey!
Ross: (rushes in) Is everything okay?
Ross: Your page said come to the hospital, what? What was it? What happened?
Ross: Oh. Oh. Thank God, most women dont even feel them.
Ross: Oh when you beeped me I was on line at the concession stand at the movie theater.
Ross: No IMona!
Ross: What? Why? Whats wrong?
Ross: No really, you tell me whats up.
Rachel: I-I forgot my underwear. (Ross lets her go.)
Ross: (To Joey) So, thanks so much for bringing her to the hospital.
Ross: Yeah but still, I mean it shouldve been me. Im the dad.
Joey: Oh uh, hey. Not as good as this guy! (Grabs Ross around the shoulders.) He brought Twizlers!
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
Chandler: Okay. (They switch places and Chandler gets out a credit card.) So uh, Ross is kinda bummed huh?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is balancing an aluminum can on her stomach as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Hey Ross! Check it out! I learned a new trick!
Ross: Hey uh, I brought you some lunch.
Ross: Well yeah!
Rachel: Oh Ross!! (Runs to the bathroom and closes the door.)
Ross: What?! What?! Rach what?!
Ross: I made her favorite, tuna salad with pickles.
Ross: (to Rachel) I-Im sorry Rach, I didnt know. Are you gonna be okay?
Ross: I cant believe this! I shouldnt be the one making her throw up!
Ross: Yeah? Not to you, because you know this stuff. I dont know any of it and Im the father. I wish Id be more involved yknow.
Ross: Yeah.
Joey: The thing is cause I live with Rachel Im here for a lot of the stuff, okay? (To Rachel) And Ross Ross is missing everything. So
Rachel: But Joey, I dont think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. I mean(Ross turns to her with wishful eyes.)Or he does.
Ross: No I-I-I would love to be around for you and the baby. And we-we can just try it like on a temporary basis.
Rachel: But Ross, its you and me!
Ross: So? Sure! But it-it wouldnt be anything romantic. And Im-Im dating MonaDamnit Mona! I was supposed to meet her like an hour ago! What is wrong with me?!
Ross: No! No its not. Joey, this is a smart idea.
Ross: Really?
Ross: Oh Rach thats great. Thats great. (They hug and Joey breathes a sigh of relief.)
Ross: What are you doing?
Ross: Yes! Please!
Ross: That's okay.
Ross: Okay, after you told me she was passed out in our room, I went in there to make sure she was all right. She was lying on my bed, all buried in peoples coats. Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know. But it was so dark, I accidentally got her lips. I started to pull away, but then I felt her start to kiss me back. It was only for a second, but... it was amazing. And now, now I find out that you kissed her first.
Ross: She's doing her laundry.
Rachel: That's not Ross!
Ross: That's not advice!
Ross: I told her I'd have to think about it. I mean, how the hell am I supposed to make this kind of a decision? (They're all quiet.) I'm actually asking you!
Ross: Yeah, cheerie-o!
Ross: Hi.
Rachel: Oh, Ross
Ross: I am so sorry.
Minster: Now Ross, repeat after me. I Ross...
Paul: (entering) Here you go honey! (Rachel kicks Ross back under the couch.)
Ross: Well, what-what would you do? Rach, if you were me, what-what would you do?
(They enter Ross's apartment. Ross is already quite hyper.)
Ross: (mouths "where?") Uh... Oh hey, do you, uh (steps on some garbage and falters) ...do you have any, um, Cinnamon Fruit Toasties?
Ross: Grazie.
ROSS: Uh, aside from that, the whole evening was pretty much a bust.
Chandler: Yeah Ross, I mean... we're excited to hear the speech but the rest of the time we're gonna wanna do, you know, "island's stuff".
Rachel: Ross, I watched you get hypnotised in Atlantic City.
Joey: No, no, it's not, don't listen to him! (to Ross) I'm gonna thump you! (points his fist at him)
Ross: Okay, good bye! (leaves)
ROSS: You like that do ya?
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: Meth-methane smells
Ross: Touched. Used. Sat on. Sleep on.
Ross: How could you have told her?
Chandler: Yes, it does bother me! And I think it would bother a lot of people. Rachel, when you were going out with Ross, did it bother you when he flirted with other women?
Ross: Hey. (To his parents) Happy Thanksgiving!
Ross: (reading the newspaper) Hey, heres a question; where did you guys get the finest oak East of the Mississippi?
ROSS: I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like a complete nightmare.
Joey: What's the matter Ross?
(Ross enters the room, takes off his robe and enters the booth. He stands with his back to the nozzles and then realises that this booth has nozzles at both sides of the wall)
Monica: But you live here! (Ross rolls his eyes.) You know that.
(Ross exits.)
Ross: (laughs as well, but for a different reason) Yeah, I didnt think of that.
Ross: Well, I was going to stick it in the ATM, but now I think Ill show the sexy teller that I am a published writer.
Ross: So, I'm guessing you had an extra ticket and couldn't decide which one of you got to bring a date?
Ross: Na-huh.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are eating breakfast as Joey enters, very happily.]
Ross: Excellent! How do you put a baby down for a nap?
Ross: Really?! Wow! Thats-thats so nice, what are you gonna get me?
Joey: I dont get it! It was in my room all night! And if she didnt take it, and I didnt take it; and you (Chandler) didnt take it, then who did? (The duck quacks.) Shh! Were trying to think! (Ross and Chandler realise it at the same moment and stare at Joey, who doesnt get it. After a short pause, with the duck still quacking, Joey figures it out and starts pointing at the duck.)
Ross: Good, you don’t want to be one of those mothers who pass on their irrational fears on their children, do you?
[Scene: Rachels Room, Joey moves Rosss coat to get the tissues Rachel wants and the engagement ring box Mrs. Geller gave him falls out of the pocket it was inside. Joey goes to one knee, picks up the box, opens it, and sees that its an engagement ring.]
Ross: So uh, where's Monica?
Ross: Why?
Ross: What's going on?
Ross: Rach, I told you, you can't call him every time any little thing comes up.
JOEY: Thanks Ross. I really like that bird though...I'll take the dog though.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Ross is sitting at the bar, Chandler serves up two mugs of hot water.]
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, Chandler and Monica are still looking for a place to do the deed.]
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, it's gonna be even worse for you... God... Ross, get ready to do some serious crying.
[Scene: Nana's house, Ross, Mrs. Geller and Aunt Lillian are going through clothes.]
Ross: Yep.
Chandler: Uh, Ross?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there.]
Ross: Dude!
Ross: You do, huh?
Ross: What are you talking about?
Joey: Well, we were! But Ross was talking so loud on his phone they threw us out!
Joey: Hey, y'know Ross, I think I kinda understand why I kinda lost it today.
[Ross enters with a melancholy look.]
Ross: No! No, you know what? (closes the door) You [can�t get in there] (?), the baby�s fine, now squam (?). Yeah, [I told you a|Tell your] story walking. (?)
Rachel: Ross, I
(Monica strides over to Ross, who is making coffee, and talks to him aside.)
Ross: I couldn't possibly eat another bite.
Ross: Yeah, yeah, she's here.
Ross: Shes fine. She doesnt know youre gone. And she doesnt have to know, okay? Now come on, were going home.
Ross: (on phone) Hi.
Ross: So, can you trust me?
Joey: Hey, Ross, you're okay with that?
Ross: My marriage is over.
Ross: Well, I guess that's it.
Ross: Okay, for instance. Let's say, Janice is coming back from a trip and she gives you two options. Option number 1 she'll take a cab home from the airport. Option 2 is you can meet her at baggage claim. Which do you do?
Ross: You got it.
Ross: Thanks for the help, problem solved. (Wipes his hands.)
Ross: What?
Ross: Heres your girlfriends button. (Holding the button.)
Monica: Ross, how long have you been planning this wedding?
Ross: Its Gandolf, and hes not coming.
Ross: 'Kay, wait a minute, are you sure she didn't say "When are you gonna grow up and realise I am your mom?"
Ross: Okay, good-good for you.
Rachel: How's Ross doing? Y'know since all the Emily stuff.
ROSS: Scotch. Alright, I'll be back in 10 seconds with your scotch on the rocks in a glass.
Joey: Ross?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is trying to tell Rachel about Emily's ultimatum again.]
Ross: Pretty cool, huh?
(There's another pause as Ross gets angry again.)
PHOEBE: What? Is it - is this 'cause of what Ross said?
(Ross takes his suitcase and tries to get out but ends up falling on Prof. Sherman's laps, thereby waking him up)
Monica: Yeah. But of course we had to update it a little bit. (To Ross) Hey, by the way, great thinking about catching me!
Ross: Oh my God its just like I dreamed it!
Ross: I just, I hate this so much! I mean, every time I go pick her up at the airport, its-its so great. But at the same time Im thinking, "Well, Im gonna be right back there in a couple of days, dropping her off."
Ross: It would be so cool to live across from you guys!
Ross: Oh, come on, now you know you want em.
Ross: Let me ask you something, at your school was there a like uh a place on campus where students went to uh, fool around.
Ross: Umm (Rachel blows her nose.)
ROSS: Ohh. . . Thanks Rach, goodnight. [goes back in apartment]