words in movies
(She hands the baby to Joey who pulls down the blanket to reveal Rosss face where the babys should be.)
Ross: (crying) I hope youre a better father than youre a friend!! (Cries again and Joey wakes up in horror.)
Phoebe: It does! How would you feel if you couldnt share your cooking? Or-or imagine how Ross would feel if he couldnt teach us about dragons.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: Hey!
Joey: Hey Ross! The babys kicking!
Ross: What?! It is?! (He tries to quickly remove his gloves, but runs into trouble and finally throws them off of his hands like a hockey player in a fight and grabs Rachels belly.)
Ross: Hey, when-when was it kicking? What happened?
Ross: My God, the babys kicking. Thats great. Although I kinda wish I-I wouldve been there to feel the kicking for the first time yknow.
Ross: Look, I-I dont want to miss anymore baby stuff. So Here. Heres my new pager number, okay? Anytime anything pregnancy related happens use it! Ill be there! Okay? I dont care if its three in the morning and all you want is ice cream.
Joey: Absolutely. But, were gonna stop by the hospital just to be sure, okay? Ill page Ross on the way. Come on.
Joey: (seeing Ross) Oh hey-hey!
Ross: (rushes in) Is everything okay?
Ross: Your page said come to the hospital, what? What was it? What happened?
Ross: Oh. Oh. Thank God, most women dont even feel them.
Ross: Oh when you beeped me I was on line at the concession stand at the movie theater.
Ross: No IMona!
Ross: What? Why? Whats wrong?
Ross: No really, you tell me whats up.
Rachel: I-I forgot my underwear. (Ross lets her go.)
Ross: (To Joey) So, thanks so much for bringing her to the hospital.
Ross: Yeah but still, I mean it shouldve been me. Im the dad.
Joey: Oh uh, hey. Not as good as this guy! (Grabs Ross around the shoulders.) He brought Twizlers!
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
Chandler: Okay. (They switch places and Chandler gets out a credit card.) So uh, Ross is kinda bummed huh?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is balancing an aluminum can on her stomach as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Hey Ross! Check it out! I learned a new trick!
Ross: Hey uh, I brought you some lunch.
Ross: Well yeah!
Rachel: Oh Ross!! (Runs to the bathroom and closes the door.)
Ross: What?! What?! Rach what?!
Ross: I made her favorite, tuna salad with pickles.
Ross: (to Rachel) I-Im sorry Rach, I didnt know. Are you gonna be okay?
Ross: I cant believe this! I shouldnt be the one making her throw up!
Ross: Yeah? Not to you, because you know this stuff. I dont know any of it and Im the father. I wish Id be more involved yknow.
Ross: Yeah.
Joey: The thing is cause I live with Rachel Im here for a lot of the stuff, okay? (To Rachel) And Ross Ross is missing everything. So
Rachel: But Joey, I dont think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. I mean(Ross turns to her with wishful eyes.)Or he does.
Ross: No I-I-I would love to be around for you and the baby. And we-we can just try it like on a temporary basis.
Rachel: But Ross, its you and me!
Ross: So? Sure! But it-it wouldnt be anything romantic. And Im-Im dating MonaDamnit Mona! I was supposed to meet her like an hour ago! What is wrong with me?!
Ross: No! No its not. Joey, this is a smart idea.
Ross: Really?
Ross: Oh Rach thats great. Thats great. (They hug and Joey breathes a sigh of relief.)
Ross and Rachel: Ahhhh!!
Joey: (to Ross) Hey.
Ross: Hi.
Rachel: Oh Ross youre so tense! You just gotta relax okay? Just need to relax all right? Just need to relax (She takes her hands off of the wheel.)
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Now that is funny. Hey, do you think...would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 'Cause she's, she's alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad.
Phoebe: Oh, the Angelica!! Go! Go! (She bangs on the cabs roof and it pulls away.) (To Ross) You didnt get the annulment?!!
Ross: Mon?
Ross: Joey, get out of the fridge.
(Ross lets them both sit in his chair.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Joey are lamenting about how they kicked Ross out.]
Ross: Oh, fire! There, theres a fire! Fire!!
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: No Phoebe, dont look! You dont want to see whats under there!!
Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey: Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!
(Ross retrieves his jacket and sees that not only has Emily arrived, but she as seen Rachel take her place on the plane.)
Ross: (to the girl sitting next to him) Hi there. How many, how many ah, did you sell?
Rachel: Oh really? Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I taped it? (Joey smiles luridly) Oh forget it! (Ross enters.) Oh there he is now, the father of my child, the porn king of the west village.
Ross: Hmm -you know, actually this'll work out well. Cause when you have to move back in with Joey, Joey's hot new roommate can come and live with me.
Joey: Yeah! Allright! Hey, hey Ross. Check it out! Sandy taught me Hot-cross Buns.
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: Thanks. You ready to go?
Ross: Anyone want me to appraise anything?
Ross: Um.... no. See, I might've had feelings for her at one timenot any more. I justI...
(Joey congratulates Ross, sees Chandler's look and abruptly stops.)
Ross: Why don't we just put 'poor little Tooty' out in the hall?
Ross: I-I heard about Mrs. Verhoeven passing away and Im so sorry for your loss.
[They get back to back and start rubbing against each other. Ross and Rachel enter.]
ROSS: Look, do you love her? And you don't have to be too emphatic about this.
Rachel: And you know Monica and Ross!
Ross: I want to take my tongue... and...
[Ross and Julie enter.]
Ross: Right.
Ross: (to Monica) You like it right?
Ross: But we do! (pause) It's gonna be ok, Rach!
Ross: No, four minutes ago you had a half hour, we have to be out the door at twenty to eight.
Phoebe: Dont be so corny Ross, its not an after-school special. (She rides off and the camera pans down to reveal two shiny, silver training wheels firmly attached.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Ross, Chandler, and Joey are entering.]
Ross: Okay when you're playing a machine and it hasn't paid out, a lurker waits for you to give up and then
Ross: Hey, say something to Emma on her 18th birthday!
Ross: Oh my God, is that still...
Ross: No youre not.
Ross: Rach!
(People start getting up. Ross grabs Carols doll to hold it upside down like a football, slapping it with his other hand.)
Ross: Rachel...
Ross: Fine. Ill go.
Ross: Rach...
ROSS: Oh my God. But the zoo told me that my monkey was dead.
Ross: All right.
Monica: Ross! She's giving us her baby. She can eat you if she wants.
Ross: Sorry.
Monica: Hey dad, what's up? (Listens) Oh God. Ross, it's Nana.
Ross: What? What?
Ross: Okay. This stuff?
Ross: Oh, okay, yknow what this is? This is a difference of opinion. And when that happens in a marriage...
Ross: Yep?
ROSS: No. Man I don't wanna have to have Joey with me every time I wanna descent cup of coffee. Ya know, and I don't wanna spend the rest of my life drinking cappucino with a 'K'. I say you and I go back down there and stand up to those guys.
Ross: Then be supportive like a guy.
Ross: What?
Ross: Right! Right! I justI want you to know that Im going to be there through this whole thing, okay? Okay? The doctors appointments, the uh, the Lamaze classes, uh baby-proofing the apartmentAlthough we could probably worry about that til after we get married.
Ross: (checks his watch) Sure, okay.
Ross: Four letters: "Circle or hoop".
Rachel: Ross! Stop that!
Ross: Ah, Im sorry.
Ross: Oh my God!
Ross: All right.
Ross: Look...
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Rach?
Ross: Okay.
ROSS: Okay, good luck (kisses her and leaves)
[Scene: The Emergency Room, Ross is still going on about his first night with Carol.]
Ross: (to Chandler) Thats a duck.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: What?
Ross: So, Ill umm...
Rachel: Ross, why didnt you tell me that?
Ross: (breaking the silence) You should get some sleep.
Ross: The one with the cat. I gotta go, Ive got another date.
Ross: Listen, I'm in Elizabeth's bathroom
Ross: It's actually kinda interesting to find out what people are doing... remember Andrea Rich?
Ross: Uh, so this play umm, what do you think? Its-its gotten great reviews! Yknow the uh
[Cut back to her room, Joey and Ross are sitting there waiting for her.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is there as Ross enters, walking very confidently.]
Monica: I just tell her, I have to get it over with. I told Ross and Phoebe and shes the only one left!
ROSS: Yeah. Hey, remember the time I jammed that pencil into your hand?
(Ross exits)
Charlie: Ross, we can solve this. I just heard your speech. We can recreate it! We've got all night!
Ross: Good.
Ross: Yay!!
Ross: Hi!
Ross: Hey, hey Rach!
Rachel: Oh! Tommy, this is Ross. Ross, Tommy.
Ross: Oh! Yeah.
Rachel: Its not dumb. But, maybe its okay that youre not a part of it. Y'know what I mean? (Ross looks confused) I mean its like, I-I-I like that youre not involved in that part of my life.
Ross: And! Break!!
Ross: Look, Mon, do you want us to uh, come back later?
Ross: Five.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Ross is acting nervous]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Ross and Rachel are on their double date. Rachel is busy talking Ross up.]