words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are sitting in their recliners watching TV. Monica, Ross, and Phoebe are there.]
ROSS: This screen is amazing, I mean Dick Van Dyke is practically life-size.
ROSS: Hey you. [they stand together in front of the TV.]
CHANDLER and JOEY: Woah, hey, yo. [Rachel and Ross move]
ROSS: Oh you know, pretty much the usual, uh, sun shining, birds chirping.
ROSS: [beeper goes off] Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got to get to the museum. So um, I'll see you tonight.
RACHEL: OK. [they go to kiss but everyone's watching so Ross just kisses her on the top of her head and leaves]
ROSS: Bye guys.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Ross and Rachel are returning from a movie.]
ROSS: I told you there was going to be sub-titles.
ROSS: It would really help when I'm kissing you if you didn't shout out my sister's name.
ROSS: Oh.
ROSS: Mon.
ROSS: Mon.
ROSS: What, what.
ROSS: And that's, that's funny why?
ROSS: I, I know it's big, I just didn't know it was uh, ha-ha big.
ROSS: OK, my hands were no where near your butt.
ROSS: No see now, now I can't because uh, I'm feeling too self conscious.
ROSS: Nuh, uh, the moment's gone.
ROSS: That's romantic.
ROSS: No.
ROSS: No.
ROSS: No.
[Ross enters]
ROSS: That was 14 hours ago.
ROSS: Oh. Listen, have you ever been uh, you know, foolin' around with a girl and uh, she started laughin'?
ROSS: Yeah. I don't know, I've been wanting this since like ninth grade typing, ya know. And I just want it to be perfect and right and. . . why isn't that laser beam cutting through the paint?
ROSS: Hey.
[Rachel and Ross go out in the hall]
ROSS: No, you, ya know there's no need to make it u. . . how?
ROSS: Humm, that sounds, I don't, perfect.
[there's a loud bang at the door so Ross opens it back up to find a shoe has been thrown at it]
[Rachel and Ross enter]
ROSS: Hey.
ROSS: Well we just wanted to stop by and uh, say goodnight.
ROSS: Look at that, they won't even turn their heads.
ROSS: Well, why're you all dressed up?
ROSS: What? You have a date? Who with?
ROSS: C'mon, what's his name?
ROSS: Come on, tell me.
ROSS: Oh, I promise, what.
ROSS: Who's Richard Burke? Doc, Doctor Burke? You have a date with Doctor Burke? Why, why, why should that bother me? I, I love that man, he's like a uh, brother to dad.
ROSS: Doctor Burke is sexy?
ROSS: [his beeper goes off] It's the museum again, can I, oh.
ROSS: [on the phone] Woah, woah, woah australopithicus isn't supposed to be in that display. No. No. No, n, homo-habilus was erect, australopithicus was never fully erect.
[Scene: Museum of Natural History. Ross is fixing a display, Rachel is waiting patiently.]
ROSS: Oh look, I can't believe this. Look, homo-habilus hasn't even learned how to use tools yet and they've got him here wi, with clay pots. Why don't, why don't they just give him a microwave? I'm sorry, I'm sorry this is taking so long, ya know, I, I, it's just it's longer than I expected, we will have dinner.
ROSS: KARL!
[Ross leaves to find Karl. Rachel takes a peek under the loincloth of one of the display models.]
[Scene: Museum of Natural History. Ross enters the display where Rachel is waiting.]
ROSS: Rach.
ROSS: I'm done.
ROSS: Wha, OK, I'm sorry, let's uh, why don't we find someplace else.
ROSS: No, no, we won't.
ROSS: [grabs a fur pelt] C'mon.
[Scene: The museum planetarium. Ross and Rachel enter on stage.]
ROSS: Shh. Do you want cran-apple or cran-grape?
ROSS: [spreads the pelt on the floor] OK, now, sit. OK. [he starts the music system]
[The stereo system booms out 'Billions of years ago. . .'. Ross gets up and changes it to music.]
ROSS: Sorry.
ROSS: Well uh, you see that, that little cluster of stars next to the big one? That is Ursa Major.
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Ross: You see this, this is a person who is ready to go. Phoebe you, oh, you are my star.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, minus Ross are playing Madlibs. Phoebe is reading hers.]
Ross: You know what I don't care. The only person I cared about getting dressed, is the one person that says she's not even gonna go. Look Rach, I'm sorry. Okay. Look, I-I wa, I was a jerk. I'm sorry I yelled. I want you there, I need you there. Look, what, what can I do that can show you how much, how much I want you to be there.
(The lights come back on, and Rachel and Paolo are making out. Ross clutches his chest.)
Joey: Okay, heres a good one for ya. Who do think would win in a fight between Ross and Chandler.
Ross: That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico! But, Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben. (He tries to bend down to pick up the bag with the presents, but can't because of the costume) Maybe the Lady will help me with these presents.
Ross: Oh-oh-ooh, hey guys, I was wondering if you guys would uh, maybe chip in on some new air filters for the air purifier? I mean after all, we all are using it.
Ross: Hello!!
Mona: (seeing Ross) Oh my God! Ross!!!
Ross: Not touching myself if that makes anyone less uncomfortable.
Joey: Pheebs! Pheebs! Ross wants to kiss you at midnight!
Mona: Now, do you think it should say, "Love Ross and Mona?"
Ross: You do?
Mona: Ross, we we have to be strong. Okay, I-Im gonna go. (She picks up the shirt Ross has just set down.) Can I? To remember you?
Ross: Sure. Yeah.
Ross: (laughs) No. (Takes the shirt back.)
Ross: Uh, yeah, you sure you want to after what happened at their 20th?
Chandler: And you wonder why Ross is their favorite?
Ross: Hey!
(Ross, Joey, and Rachel enter)
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Ross is cleaning the foosball table, Joey is working on his script.]
Ross: Ah, actually, Im sorry we-we probably should get going.
Ross: Yknow what?! It doesnt matter! It doesnt matter what you believe! What matters is what happened!
ROSS: Hey, hey buddy, Marcel. Marcel. [Marcel doesn't react so Ross starts singing] In the jungle, the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight. [no reaction from Marcel, Monica and Joey urge him on] In the jungle, the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight. [Marcel looks over and everyone joins in] a-weema-way, a-weema-way..... [Marcel runs over and hops up on Ross's shoulder]
(They all cheer and Rachel, Ross and Phoebe join in for a group hug. Joey also joins, but he stands back a bit, because he is all sticky of the food on him)
Woman: (To Ross and Rachel) Congratulations you two!
Ross: So uh, he seems like a nice guy.
Ross: Thats a good question, dad. Thats a good question
Ross and Rachel: What?!
Ross: WhaWhat?
Ross: Can you believe that?
Woman: Ross!
Ross: Hey
Ross: Hi Aunt Lisa, Uncle Dan
ROSS: It wasn't so much a party as...a gathering of people, with food, and music, and, and the band.
Ross: We love marriage!
Ross: What was wrong with Mona?
Ross: Im so we werent in the car! Did he ever let up?
Ross: Yeah baby!
Ross and Rachel's Apartment.
Ross: (putting the magazine back and holding the money for it) Okay.
ROSS: Hey, I've been doin' it since the ninth grade, I've gotten pretty damn good at it.
Woman: (To Ross) So, how did you propose?
(Cut to Rachel and Ross)
Rachel: (to Ross) Oh my God!! (she turns around and hugs Mark, not Ross)
[Scene: The librarys Paleontology section, Ross is patrolling as a couple walks up.]
Mrs. Geller: Ross, why dont you give us your toast now?
Mrs. Geller: (crying) Oh Ross
Amy: Hello? Yeah, um. Hang on one sec. <to Ross and Rachel> Can I take this upstairs?
Ross: Sure, we don't live there but...
Ross: Do you realize I have a classroom full of students?
Ross: Yeah.
Joey: All right, okay, this is great, uh, Chandler, you get behind the desk. And-and when she comes in hopefully, she wont recognise you because, well, why would she? Uh, okay, and then you buzz Ross and I. (to Ross) You be Mr. Gonzalez, and Ill be uh, Mr. Wong.
Ross: Correct! What is Chandler Bings job?
ROSS: No, no, I don't wanna put it off, I just, God I just, I spent last year being so unbelievably miserable, ya know, and now, now I'm actually happy. You know, I mean, really happy. I just, I just don't wanna, I don't wanna mess it up, ya know.
Rachel: Okay Ross, can I uh, can I ask you something?
Ross: I know, I know it was stupid.
ROSS: Uhh, hey look, I don't really enjoy being with other men that way. But, um, zoo dollars?
Ross: What? Is it the comet? (Runs over to where Joeys standing.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Monica are there.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Oh! ...Yeah, they were gross. Oh, you know what I loved? Her Sweet 'n' Los. How she was always stealing them from- from restaurants.
Ross: Whyd you say no?
Ross: How about the place settings?
Ross: Shhh! Were not talking.
Rachel: Yeah, no. Ross has a PhD.
Phoebe: Well, there's a spot open for only one groomsman and you have to choose between Ross and Chandler. So good luck with that.
Ross: Well each tell you how we came up with the joke and then you decide which one of us is telling the truthme.
Ross: Look I was going to tell you!
Ross: She sweat, wet. got it going like a turbo 'vette.
Ross: I think It's the most beautiful table I've ever seen.
Monica: Fine! Judge all you want to but, (points to Ross) married a lesbian, (points to Rachel) left a man at the altar, (points to Phoebe) fell in love with a gay ice dancer, (points to Joey) threw a girls wooden leg in a fire, (points to Chandler) livin in a box!! (goes to her room)
Ross: Are you serious?!
Joey: (to Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe) Did you hear that? I only get one extra ticket to my premiere. So some how I have to pick between you three and Ross.
Ross: Wow! We are pretty good at this!
Ross: Did she (points at Amy) do this to her? I told you we shouldn't have left Emma with her!
Ross: Joey, its worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.
Ross: Oh, veto. How aboutOoh, I like Ruth! What about Ruth?
Ross: Are you kidding?
Ross: It tastes like feet!
Ross: So, I uh I called the doctor and now we both know the sex of the baby.
Ross: Don't say that.
Rachel: Ross, hey you know what might make it less boring?
(Ross continues to talk to her as the camera pans to show Rachel standing in the doorway.)
Ross: Yeah, so far nothing stupid.
Ross: Yeah, you too.
ROSS: Sweetie, it's be gonna okay, all right. It's a wedding, generally people focus on the bride.
Ross: Uh no, no just-just that he is a great guy.
Ross: Yeah, well what about you? You weren't you know, so hot in college either. After everything he said, he'd go "ba dum bum chessh"
Ross: Sure, you want to go upstairs?
<Ross and Rachel go in the kitchen>
Ross: I would say that.
Ross: Okay, here I go.
Ross: Your make-up!
Ross: It really was.
(Ross dives over the couch, Rachel goes the other way, and lands up top of him.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are standing and talking, Ross is tying a tie.]
Ross: That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!
Rachel: And you know Monica and Ross!
Ross: Hi Jill.