words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Rachel are sitting on the couch and Ross is sitting on the chair, and theyre all talking.]
Ross: She seems really, really fun!
Ross: What?!
Ross: So thats two of my wives.
Joey: Well, Im sorry. I thought parents were coming! Yknow? Your parents are comin! Chandlers parents are comin! Rosss parents are comin!
Monica: Rosss parents are my parents!
Rachel: So Joey I just hooked Ross and Chandler up with some tuxedos for the wedding, do you need one?
Phoebe: To Ross.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch reading as Ross enters carrying a garment bag.]
Ross: Hey! Guess what I got for your wedding! (Holding up his garment bag.)
Ross: No. Rachel hooked me up with a tux! But not just any tux, Batmans tux!
Ross: Thats right! Made expressly for Val Kilmer and worn by him in the hit film that Batman film he was in.
Ross: So?
Ross: Well, you need something to make this day special? Hello! You-you-you have the most special thing of all! You are marrying the woman you love.
Ross: Pretty please? Not very uh, 007.
Ross: When I got married you slept with my sister.
Chandler: Ross is Batman!
Chandler: Rachel got Ross the tuxedo that Val Kilmer wore in Batman. Okay Batman is so much cooler than James Bond!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are working on the seating chart as Ross enters carrying his tux around.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Yes. I find it to be something of a conversation piece.
Ross: Gunther. (To Chandler) Hey-hey! Why dont we put them on? Yknow get a picture of Batman and James Bond together.
Ross: Well that stinks. I was looking forward to us wearing our celebrity tuxes together.
Ross: What are you kidding? Its Batmans tux!!
Ross: Okay, but just the jacket. Double-oh and seven are not gettin in there.
Ross: What?
Ross: Let me see that! (Grabs the invitation and reads it.) Oh man!
Ross: Sit down.
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Its not that. Okay? Annulments are more complicated than I
Ross: Oh hi!
Ross: Wow! Uh how are you?
Ross: You wanna, you wanna grab some coffee?
Ross: Right. Good night.
Mona: Ross?
Ross: Great! Well umm
Ross: Sure! Uh, let me get it for ya.
Ross: What?
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah. Yeah, I think I will.
Ross: Ok! (he takes the camera and walks backwards to take a shot) See? Scared of swings, I bet you feel pretty silly (a swinging boy knocks him down) Ow!
Monica: So Ross, are you gonna bring Mona?
Ross: Ahh, sorry, nothing you can do about it. Its one of my ah, rights as the ex-boyfriend. (closes his eyes again) Oop, oh yeah!
Ross: (whines) Oh thats great! I was hiking along the foothills of Mount Tibidaybo
Ross: (laughs) Umm thats thats a little misleading.
(The woman and Ross stare at each other. Finally she takes her stuff out of the machine and leaves.)
(Monica and Chandler look shocked as Ross goes to leave.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are on the couch as Joey and Ross enter.]
Rachel: I know! I know, she says its all mass-produced, nothing is authentic, and everyone winds up having the same stuff. (Ross looks at his table.) So come on, shes gonna be here any second! Can we please just cover this up with something?! Please?
Ross: So, do we really have to ask whos going up on the platform next?
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Yes!
Ross: You made it!
Joey: So Ross?
(Treeger leaves and Ross notices the door.)
Chandler: (To Ross) Marry her.
Joey: So you think Ross too?
Chandler: (To Monica) You picked Ross?!
[Cut to Mona and Ross walking past Chandler.]
Joey: Monica and I were talking about who could kick whose ass in a fight, you or Ross?
Chandler: (To Ross) Youre going down.
Ross: Correct. Chandler was how old when he first touched a girls breast?
Ross: Its still looks pretty far!
Ross: Eh? Well show him!
Ross: Pride.
Rachel: Oh. (They leave, leaving just Joey and Ross.)
Monica: Oh my God! Ross, you wouldn't believe the cute little noises the twins are making. Listen.
Ross: (To Chandler) So, you gettin tired?
Ross: (celebrating) Oh yeah!
Chandler: Fine. (He lets Ross win.) Oh no!
Ross: Okay, I don't think it's going to pivot anymore.
Ross: Hey, 30 is not that old! Do you know how old the Earth is?
Ross: (on phone) Yeah Ill press 1! (Presses one which allows Rachel to escape.)
Joey: Ross! So when is it gonna air?
(Monica and Ross push to the front)
Joey: Hey don't worry about that! I mean, Ross needs you! And Rachel and I will stay and help anyway we can.
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Youre moving?
Ross: Oh umm, well uh, maybe-maybe later. Right now, Im about to dance with this lady.
Ross: Yeah. No. No youre right.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: No but ahh! How much easier would it be if it were?
JOEY: [to Ross] Hey, so how'd it go with Julie? Did you, did you break her heart?
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: What?
Ross: Oh, thank God!
Ross: Yknow I would its just painful.
Ross: Well yeah, but she doesnt know that. I mean, the last time she saw you-you wouldve turned one of those little wedding chairs into kindling.
Sandy: Well, I guess we know who's gonna be the Grumpus... (Ross goes to the kitchen)
Ross: Thank you. (Joey mouths to Ross, "Youll show me right?") No!
Ross: Wait a minute! Were you on a poster for gonorrhea?
Monica: Ross, I'm gonna use yours, okay?
[Scene: Ross's Apartment, the gang is helping Ross move out by carrying boxes. Chandler has picked a particularly large and apparently heavy box, because he takes a running start at it and still can't budge it.]
Ross: Oh my God! Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who hasn't won the Nobel Prize?
Ross: Really?!
Ross: Sweet!
Ross: Yeah, were done.
Ross: Its not for me, its for Rachel.
Ross: Damnit!
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Emma is sitting in her chair on the apothecary table and Rachel is trying to make her laugh.]
Chandler: Hey. (He sees that Ross is packing all of the hotel toiletries) Soaps? Shampoos? Are you really taking all this stuff?
Ross: Oh I dont know that it would.
Ross: Hi. How is she?
ROSS: So five of us is, $33.50 apiece.
Ross: (intently listening) Why?
Paul: Yeah Ross its okay, its me, Mr. Stevens.
Ross: So, uh, the other night Rachel and I are in bed talking about fantasies, and I happened to describe a particular Star Wars thing....
Ross: What did you want to show us? Because all I can see is this bitchin' van!
Ross: Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, well its-its really personal stuff, yknow?
Ross: Youre right. Thats very different. So lets, lets just sign the papers. All right? (Sits down and Rachel keeps standing there.) What?
Ross: It was. It was an amazing night.
Ross: The flirting! Aren't you supposed to be going out with, I don't know hmm, let's say my sister?!
(Ross angrily throws the kit into one of Monicas new boxes.)
ROSS: ??? (speech garbled) Thro up a thro thro--a thro thro!
Ross: Uh, before we do uh, are any of Joeys special romance magazines in there?
Joey: Look, Chandler, I told you, never tell anyone about this dog thing. It's like Ross not likin ice cream.
Ross: And is a hum, kinda like a scruddle?
Ross: Hey, I just realized we kinda let some stuff up in the air
Ross: Ah, its good. Its going good. I mean, we get along great. Shes, shes so
Ross: Okay, bye.
Ross: Yeah, a lot of my students do that.
Ross: Well, I was gonna say sweet, but yeah-huh!
Ross: (to the panel) Look, Im sorry, but you guys are wrong. I just dont want to be divorced three times.
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Kinda like a big face without skin.
Ross: Im sorry, I meant a blue LeSabre.
Ross: Well how much time before she absolutely has to start getting ready?