words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Rachel are sitting on the couch and Ross is sitting on the chair, and theyre all talking.]
Ross: She seems really, really fun!
Ross: What?!
Ross: So thats two of my wives.
Joey: Well, Im sorry. I thought parents were coming! Yknow? Your parents are comin! Chandlers parents are comin! Rosss parents are comin!
Monica: Rosss parents are my parents!
Rachel: So Joey I just hooked Ross and Chandler up with some tuxedos for the wedding, do you need one?
Phoebe: To Ross.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch reading as Ross enters carrying a garment bag.]
Ross: Hey! Guess what I got for your wedding! (Holding up his garment bag.)
Ross: No. Rachel hooked me up with a tux! But not just any tux, Batmans tux!
Ross: Thats right! Made expressly for Val Kilmer and worn by him in the hit film that Batman film he was in.
Ross: So?
Ross: Well, you need something to make this day special? Hello! You-you-you have the most special thing of all! You are marrying the woman you love.
Ross: Pretty please? Not very uh, 007.
Ross: When I got married you slept with my sister.
Chandler: Ross is Batman!
Chandler: Rachel got Ross the tuxedo that Val Kilmer wore in Batman. Okay Batman is so much cooler than James Bond!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are working on the seating chart as Ross enters carrying his tux around.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Yes. I find it to be something of a conversation piece.
Ross: Gunther. (To Chandler) Hey-hey! Why dont we put them on? Yknow get a picture of Batman and James Bond together.
Ross: Well that stinks. I was looking forward to us wearing our celebrity tuxes together.
Ross: What are you kidding? Its Batmans tux!!
Ross: Okay, but just the jacket. Double-oh and seven are not gettin in there.
Ross: What?
Ross: Let me see that! (Grabs the invitation and reads it.) Oh man!
Rachel: Now wait a minute thats not fair. He was married to me a hell of a lot longer than he was married to Emily, he just didnt tell me. (Everyone looks at her, Ross not happily.) Maybe I have to pee again. (Gets up to try to use the bathroom.)
ROSS: That's romantic.
[Ross enters]
ROSS: Hey.
Ross: I can't believe this, she's our daughter! That you would treat her like some kind of showdog is inexcusable!
Ross: No!! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn't know, how should I know?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Mrs. Green is telling Ross what needs to be done to baby proof his apartment.]
ROSS: Yeah. I don't know, I've been wanting this since like ninth grade typing, ya know. And I just want it to be perfect and right and. . . why isn't that laser beam cutting through the paint?
ROSS: Hey.
[Rachel and Ross enter]
ROSS: Come on, tell me.
[Scene: The Banquet Room, Chandler is under one of the tables as Ross enters.]
(Ross wakes up with a start and startles Rachel. The guy next to him starts laughing, which starts Ross laughing, Rachel gives him a look and he stops.)
Ross: Oh no! It could be better, but its gonna be okay, right?
Ross: Perhaps. Now Im curious, at what point during those girlish screams would you have begun to kick my ass?
ROSS: Rach.
ROSS: No, no, we won't.
RACHEL: Ross, you have planned out the next 20 years of our lives, we've been dating for six weeks.
ROSS: Sorry.
Paul: (standing in front of a mirror and to himself) Just relax. Just relax Paul, youre doing great. (Ross moves a piece of luggage over so he can watch Paul.) She likes you. She Maybe, she likes you. She likes you. Yknow why? Because youre a (pause) neat guy. (Ross cant believe what hes hearing.) You are the man. You are (pause) the man! (He opens his shirt and looks at his chest.) I still got it. Nice and sexy. Youre just a love machine. (Starts singing) Im just a love machine and I wont work for nobody but you! Hey bab-y! (Flexes and grunts loudly.) Showtime. (Starts to leave and starts singing.) Im just a love machine, yeah ba-by! (Grunts again and Ross is stunned.)
ROSS: I'm done.
Rachel: Well-well, I dont know Rossreally?
[Scene: Dr. Rhodes's Office, a rather large group of doctors has now gathered to take a look at Ross's thing. Ross is none too pleased with the developments, he has a disgusted look on his face.]
Ross: No, women are welcome to play.
ROSS: C'mon, what, you never think about our future?
Ross: Yeah, I really do. Yeah, but what am I gonna do, I mean we-we both agreed that it was gonna be a two-week thing, yknow no commitment.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Joey, and Monica are sitting on the couch as Ross is up getting some coffee.]
ROSS: What? What's on your shoulder?
Rachel: Well, I... you know, I-I-I don't know what to say... I mean, I never thought of you as a guy who needed his men to be men. You know, 'cause I gotta tell you Ross, it not like you just came in from branding cattle.
ROSS: A tattoo? Why, why would you want to do that? [to Rachel] Hi.
ROSS: Are you trying to get me to bribe you?
ROSS: Alright, shall we?
ROSS: Hi ma.
Ross: (in a mocking voice)Uh...sure I do, and I also wanna be King of my own country and find out what happened to Amelia Earhart.
[Time lapse. The girls have Ross pinned face down. Phoebe is sitting on his back and arms while holding his head down and facing Rachel. Rachel is sitting on his knees and holding his lower legs vertically, causing Ross pain.]
Joey: Have a nice six more months Ross! (Starts to leave.)
Ross: Ow! Ow! Okay, okay, fine, fine! All right, you wanna win by cheating, go ahead, all right. Phoebe the touchdown does count, you win.
ROSS: No, no, I mean, ya know, I, I read a book and there was a girl named Emily and I thought, I thought that might be good.
ROSS: Dad, you really don't want to do that.
RACHEL: Yes I do, it's just that Ross is. . .
Ross: So, your ex-boyfriend is gonna determine if your new boyfriend gets this grant? Wow, your new boyfriend is screwed!
Ross: But also knowing it means a lot.
ROSS: The big book of childrens' names.
Phoebe: Oh, you guys! We've got to keep all the tickets together (takes the bowl from Ross and puts it on the table)
RACHEL: Ok, Ross, Ross, ok listen, what we have is amazing.
RACH: Ross kissed me.
ROSS: Yeah.
ROSS: Mon, Mon, are you OK?
ROSS: Eww.
ROSS: Look at that, they won't even turn their heads.
ROSS: Ohh.
Chandler: Ross! You gotta stop! Okay?! You cant just stare through the peep hole for three hours! Youre gonna get peep eye!
Joey: Let it go, Ross.
ROSS: Yeah.
[Scene: Outside Monas Apartment, Ross is knocking on the door.]
Rachel: Yeah. So don't move, okay? Just stay here and... (nods towards Ross) maybe close your blinds at night.
ROSS: You were in a porno?
RACHEL: Is Ross here?
Ross: Wow, I havent seen her for like forever. I wonder if she still carries that Barbie everywhere she goes.
ROSS: Hey, save us some pizza. [they go off to Rachel's room]
Ross: Im sorry about your date.
ROSS: You got a tattoo?
ROSS: Wha, OK, I'm sorry, let's uh, why don't we find someplace else.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are at the counter as Ross enters.]
ROSS: Ok fine.
ROSS: Get out.
ROSS: We're not done.
Monica: Anyway, Ross and I were always captains, and um, it got kindve competitive and one year, Geller Bowl VI, I accidentally broke Rosss nose.
[Susan approaches Ross, who's looking lonely]
Ross: Im so proud of you.
Ross: (patting his clothes like he is looking for his wallet) No, no hes not.
RACHEL: Yeah well, Ross just made plans for the whole century.
ROSS: Now that's a little spoiled. He was supposed to type "little", the idiot.
Rachel: Oh, look at the little cat! [a small kitten is on the roof behind Ross] Look at it!
Ross: Yeah, well it came to about $112, but what the hell, just call it an even 110?
ROSS: Get the what?
ROSS: Well, ya know, they're a little behind the times in Colonial Williamsburg.
ROSS: [comes out] All yours.
Ross: So they ah, they all took off, it was pretty hard watching them go, y'know?
ROSS: C'mon, just tell me, please, please.
ROSS: [childish voice] Shut up.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Ross enter in sweats carrying rackets.]
Ross: No problem. I cannot wait for you to meet my friends.
ROSS: Good, 'cause I love you.
Phoebe: Yeah and yeah, and it would probably be better than the last telephone job I had. Yknow, I probably wouldnt have to say spank as much. (Monica and Ross are shocked.)
Ross: Thanks. (Joey hugs him) OK.
Ross: (to the crowd in the laundromat) All right, show's over. Nothing to see here. (to Rachel) Ok, let's do laundry.
Ross: What, so this guy is helping you for no apparent reason?
ROSS: Yeah.
Mark: Ive kinda of had this ah, this crush on you. (Rachel is shocked) But since you were with Ross, I-I didnt do anything about it. But, now that youre not, Id really like to ask you out sometime. So-so thats-thats what Im doing, now.
ROSS: Well that's the first time we've said that.
ROSS: OK.
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is talking to a man at the counter. Ross and Phoebe are sitting at the couches.]
Ross: (to Joey) It's ok, because they have to get it out of their system, okay (back to Mon and Chan), but you're going to realize, this is the only place, you wanna be.
Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Rachel: Oh yeah, really? Is it Ross? Yeah? Okay, well let me make this a just a little bit easier for you.
(They start to walk into the living room and notice someones head sticking up from behind a chair. The camera cuts to the other side and we see its Ross.)
ROSS: Well, I'm gonna kiss you.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is siting on the couch as Ross and Chandler enter after playing basketball.]
Mr. Geller: (To Ross) Do you remember the Ludwins? The big one had a thing for you, didn't she?