words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
Ross: What's going on?
(Ross turns to look at Joey.)
Ross: Oh God, here we go!
Ross: Anytime anything comes close to touching her eye or anyone else's she like freaks out. Watch! Watch! (He takes his finger and moves it towards his eye.)
Rachel: (flinches) Ross! Come on! That's all right! Fine--Okay, I have a weird thing about my eye. Can we not talk about it please?
Ross: Hey, does anybody want to get some lunch? All those in favor say I? (Pokes his eye)
Rachel: (freaks) Ross! Stop it! Come on!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
Ross: All right, I gotta go. I'm taking Ben to the park.
Ross: All right, bye!
Ross: Later! (Exits.)
Phoebe: Uh, it's a piece of paper and it says, "Ross" on it.
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: Uhh, not much. You guys want to see a movie tonight?
Ross: I don't know, umm
Ross: What's with her?
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Action.
(Ross pauses and looks at him, Joey motions for him to hurry up.)
Ross: Dude, you are sick.
Joey: Man, I wish Ross was coming with us! Y'know? I'm gonna miss him!
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: I just wanna say good-bye to you guys and to see if you guys will place a little bet for me, huh? Twenty bucks on black 15.
Ross: All right!
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what 'cha reading? (Phoebe ignores him) Pheebs? (Turns away) Hello? (He sits down next to her and she moves over a bit.) Phoebe? (He moves closer and she keeps moving away.) Phoe-Phoebe! (They end up hanging over the arm rest.) Come on! (He grabs the magazine away from her.)
Ross: Phoebe, are you, are you mad at me, or something? 'Cause if are please, tell me what it is I did!
Ross: Well, I don't know.
Ross: Well, whatever it is I'm-I'm very, very sorry. Okay?
Ross: Okay. So we're, we're good?
Ross: All right. (Gets up.) I'll uh, I'll see you later, okay?
Ross: ALL RIGHT!! Phoebe now come on! Will you please tell me what it is I did that mad you so mad at me!
Ross: Well if you can't remember, can't we just forget about this?
(Ross isn't sure what to do with that comment.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there. Ross is trying to figure out why Phoebe's mad at him.]
Ross: Okay, are you mad at me because my hair gel smells?
Ross: Are you angry at me because I said your handwriting is childlike?
Ross: Yeah? Sometimes it's (Does the fist thing.)
Ross: Okay, I'm the baby. (Points at his eye.)
Ross: Hey!
Phoebe: Ooh that is definitely Chandler, Joey, or Ross. (Thinks) Or-or Rachel!
Ross: (entering) Okay Pheebs, I know how we're going to figure this out. Okay, clear your mind and answer the first thing that comes into your head. Okay?
Ross: What do you like better flora or fauna?
Ross: Who would you rather be Simon or Garfunkle?
Ross: Why are you mad at me?
Ross: When did I say you were boring?!
Ross: Phoebe! You and I have never played chess!
Ross: Hey Rach, can you pass me the TV Guide?
(Phoebe jumps to the floor as Ross tackles Rachel off of the couch. Chandler helps push Rachel onto the floor by jumping over the back of the couch. Phoebe grabs Rachel's head to hold it still and opens Rachel's eye as Monica jumps onto Chandler's back to administer the torture--I mean medicine.)
Ross: Uh-huh. Well, when the psychiatrist told me I had to take a leave of absence because I yelled at my boss I started to get worked up again, so he offered me a tranquilizer. And I thought was a good idea so, I took it.
Benjamin: (looks surprised and un-impressed) That's not even kinda close! (Ross looks around confused) Dr. Li, how many graduate students you'd be needing?
Ross: (To Rachel) Hey, do you have any gum?
Joey: (waving) Very funny Ross! Very life-like and funny. Okay. (Notices that a woman is waving back.) Oh no-no-no, I wasn't waving at you lady. (She just stares at him.) (Joey sees how beautiful she is.) Whoa, maybe I was! Hey, Monica, this totally hot girl in Ross's building is flirting with me.
Ross: Okay, okay, I'll go first.
Ross: Are you're hands still wet?
Ross: O is for "oh, wow!" The V is for this very surprising turn of events, which I'm still fine with by the way. E is for how extremely normal I find it. That you two are together. And now one day you might get married and have children of your own.
Monica: Ross this is the only thing left that has a shot at working.
Rachel: Ross?
Ross: I'm here.
Ross: Ooh, Ooh.
Ross: Nevermind.
Rachel: Ross?
Ross: I'm smarter than him!
Ross: What are you doing? We're going to a hospital.
Ross: I'm hurt.
Ross: Well... you never know. How's, um.. how's the family?
Chandler: Ross and the most beautiful girl in the world.
Ross: Save it.
Ross: (to Rachel) Im really glad we came. (Rachel smiles and rubs his arm) Youre so pretty. I love you.
Ross: Yeah... I guess. I don'tI don't know. Alright, just... just give her this for me, OK? (gives Chandler a gift for Rachel)
[Ross enters, sees Joey in the mirror]
Ross: Marcel! Where are you going with that disc?
Ross: (to Carol) Where the hell have you been?
Ross: I'll get it.
Joey: I had a dream once about a fax machine that did that. (Ross picks it up)
Ross: Dr. Franzblau, hi.
Ross: I got itI'm getting it!
Ross: Oh, what are you going to do, follow me down there?
Ross: No, no, don't, don't, rub it! Don't! (clapping) What gets out hummus?! What gets out hummus?!
Monica: All right, lets be practical, if Ross isnt willing to do it, hes not the only guy in the world you can have sex with. You can borrow ChandlerChandler is good!
Phoebe: Thanks, Ross.
Ross: Well, I don't know.... (gestures) huh-huh.... but I'm hoping (gestures) huh-huh.
Ross: Come on! All the cool kids are eating em! (chases after her.)
Ross: No, she was definitely on my bed.
Ross: No, no, it's okay. Really. They're plenty of people who just see their sisters at Thanksgiving and just see their college roommates at reunions and just see Joey at Burger King. So is, is that better?
Ross: 15 more seconds, 14, 13, 12...
Ross: Breathe.
Ross: I got it.
Ross: Why?
Susan: (to Ross) See what you did.
Ross: No, you started it.
Ross: (to Carol) Yeah, listen...
Ross: But...
Ross: (to Susan) Thanks a lot.
(Joey and Ross laughs)
Ross: ...How long was I in there?
Ross: Please. This is so your fault.
Ross: Yeah, Susan.
Ross: That's nice... now, was that before or after you told him to stop calling, stop sending you flowers and to generally leave you alone, hmm?
Ross: Breathe.
Ross: Help! Help!
Joey: All right, listen, Ross... you like this girl, right?
[Scene: Ross's hotel room. Ross and is reading his keynote speech to Charlie from his laptop]
Ross: 'The hills were alive with the sound of music.'
Chandler: Yeah I know, but I was really confused and then I talked to these guys. (Turns to look at Ross and Joey.)
Ross: Watch. (he takes the laptop) Here, you ehm... You highlight the word you want to change. Go under Tools and the Thesaurus generates... 'gives'... 'gives' a whole list of choices. You can pick the word that sounds smartest.
Ross: Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
Rachel: All right! Ross, do you think its easy for me to see you with somebody else?
ROSS: [on the phone] Woah, woah, woah australopithicus isn't supposed to be in that display. No. No. No, n, homo-habilus was erect, australopithicus was never fully erect.
Ross: We're here!
Ross: Its worth the pain. (She goes to hug him again.) Yknow what, you know what? Its not.
Ross: Hey.
Ross: Yknow what? I can easily get out of this, but there is a chance you can get very, very hurt!
Ross: Oh, thanks, Pheebs!
Monica: Ross, can I?
Ross and Joey: No-no-no-no-no. (They start to turn away, but Phoebe stops them, and turns them back to face her.)
Ross: The head, the head. You gotta...
Ross: 59 seconds. (holds up his watch) Quartz, ha.
Ross: You wanna explain that?
Ross: Thanks. (Gets up and as he does so, the sound returns. Without another word he heads into her bathroom.)
Ross: (Mortified) Hi.
Joey: Oh! Maybe they'll name yours after you! Y'know, they'll call it, The Ross. And then people would be like, "Awww, he's got a Ross."
Ross: Hey.
Tour Guide: Im Rhonda, (motions to her breasts) and these arent real! (Joey and Ross look at each other, shocked)
Ross: (Quietly) hey, fella! How you doing?
Ross: Ok, got the vent open.
Ross: "Heating device."
Ross: Thanks! (walks out of the room and starts hugging the wall) Thank you! (closes the door)
JOEY: What about Ross? I mean, are you still mad at him cause he made that list about you?
Ross: Hey, is Rachel here? Um, I wanted to wish her a happy birthday before I left.
Ross: Okay, so I'm gonna be the only one standing there alone when the ball drops?
Ross: Well maybe he'll get to go soon, like on a class trip or something.
Ross: So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he still in love with her?
Monica: (To Ross) Cassie needs to stay at your place.
Ross: Hi.
Young Monica: (entering the shot) Ross!!! (starts to wipe up the spill)
Ross: No.
Ross: At the coffeehouse, right.
Ross: Oh, thank you. (She goes to kiss him, but he holds her coat up between their faces to stop her.) Hey, hey. (opens the door, sees Rachel, and hides Chloe behind the door) Rachel!!!!
Ross: I know.
Ross: Yeah, they print jokes, interviews, hard-hitting journalism. Its not just about the pictures.
Ross: (sigh)....I have to go to China.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are on the couch as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Ross, I am telling you that she is using you to get back at me!
Ross: I think it means he freaked out and left!
Ross: (turning towards him) Yes Mr. Lewis, how can I help you?
(Phoebe gets up, holds the picture of Ross up to her face.)
Phoebe: You dont have to do that, Ross and Joey arent here, you can watch the parade if you want.
Ross: Um, in Phoebe's room. You can't go in there.