words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is siting on the couch as Ross and Chandler enter after playing basketball.]
Ross: (To Chandler) Dude, that reverse lay-up! Oh
Ross: Amazing!
Ross: Oh, you guys call him Cute Coffeehouse Guy, we call him Hums While He Pees.
Chandler: Yes, and we call Ross Lingers In The Bathroom.
Phoebe: He is! But hes getting divorcedRoss! Maybe you know him.
Ross: Its not a club.
Ross: Hey, divorced men are not bad men!
Ross: Soon hell be able to call you, that lady he knew who got fired.
Ross: Maybe I should open a divorced mens club.
Ross: I could put uh-uh a basketball court in the back.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, and Ross are going over the picture proofs.]
Ross: I like this one. (Points to it.) It seems to say, "I love you and thats why I have to kill you."
Phoebe: Okay, I know. Hold on. (She walks over to the couch.) Hey Ross?
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: What?! No!
Ross: Look, I dont think so Pheebs. (Pause) All right, Ill do it. But just because youre a friend. (Grabs the tickets and heads to divert Whitney.)
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is dancing around his living room as Phoebe enters, catching and startling him.]
Ross: All right! I want my key back!
Ross: Its right there! (Points to her hand.)
Ross: Look, Im sorry but you-you-you better go Pheebs.
Ross: Oh yeahNoYoure welcome. Well talk about it later.
(Ross opens the door to reveal Whitney standing there.)
Ross: Hi Whitney.
Whitney: Hi Ross! You ready for breakfast?
Ross: Yep. (Phoebe slams the door shut.) Okay.
Phoebe: (To Ross) Kyles ex-wife? You were supposed to divert her not date her!
Ross: (opens the door and to Whitney) Hi! Im sorry, but can you give me a second while I talk to this woman, who by the way did not spend the night.
Ross: Okay. (Closes the door.) (To Phoebe) I did divert her and we ended up having a great time! Okay?
Ross: Yes! Thats where we realized we were both super cool people!
Phoebe: Well look-look, okay Ross, Kyle just told me some really bad stuff about her.
Ross: Like what?
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Fine! Thank you for warning me. At breakfast Ill be on full alert for room painting and sex weapons.
Ross: Yeah!
Ross: Pheebs come on! I mean, consider the source! Of course her ex-husbands gonna say that stuff. Now, if youll excuse me
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Phoebe are there.]
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Listen, you are hearing one side of the story, okayand F.Y.I she mustve shown Kyle over 30 paint samples before she painted that room! And his response to each one was, "I dont give a tiny rats ass."
Ross: Well, I dont think we are gonna have that problem, but maybe thats just because I am not emotionally unavailable!
Ross: I think he can be.
Ross: Well, excuse her for knowing what she wants to do with her life!
Ross: (angrily) I knew you were gonna throw that in my face!! That was three years ago! She apologized and she apologized! What more do you want?!!
Ross: So do we!! So do we!! (Ross notices a couple has been staring at them.) Im sorry you had to see that.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Phoebe are there again, only now theyre not talking to each other. Phoebe is loudly stirring her coffee.]
Ross: My God!
Ross: Well maybe she wouldnt have to be selfish in bed if someone else knew where everything was!
Ross: Wh-whats up?
Ross: Oh just say it Kyle!
Ross: (To Whitney) Yknow, he hums when he pees!
Ross: It makes him miss the bowl, but whatever.
Ross: Thats all right, we-we dont need you. In fact, hey Im over it already.
Ross: (To Phoebe) Im sorry. Ugh, Pheebs, you were, you were right about her. Yknow, she did try to use sex as a weapon! Yeah, I hurt my back a little.
Ross: Yeah, were better off without them.
Ross: Divorced mens club.
Ross: Rach, come on, if you think about it, its actually kinda funny. (He laughs, and he laughs alone.) Okay, maybe its best not to think about it.
Ross: No, not this time. (he folds) So... what'd you have?
[Scene: Hillarys apartment, Hillary and Ross are finishing up their date.]
(Ross shoots Joey a look, who shoots Chandler a look, who gives Joey an Oh my God. look back.)
Rachel: Hi Ross!
Ross: Hey Rachel.
Ross: Umm, no.
RACH: Oh, I know, I'm sorry you guys. You're just gonna have to get used to the fact that I will not be dating Ross.
Ross: Okay. (He does so.)
Ross: Were sorry.
Chandler: Okay. (They switch places and Chandler gets out a credit card.) So uh, Ross is kinda bummed huh?
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: I cant let him go out that way, hes got a meeting. (To Ross) Youve got something here on your back.
Ross: Didnt you spend last night at Joeys?
Ross: I cant believe no one believes me!
Rachel: Honey, come on, I have to be at work in like ten minutes (Ross starts kissing her neck) Oh, all right, well it's not like I'm employee of the year or anything. (they fall onto the couch)
Ross: Men. I guy I know.
Ross: Try telling my wife that.
Ross: Okay, I've got to go pick up Ben but I-I will figure something out. (He opens the door and stops.) Hey, didn't he used to have a cat?
Monica: (coming out of the bedroom) You jerk! You know how much I love that kid! (starts to chase Ross around the living room)
Monica: Its so good, that I feel really selfish about being the only one whos eating it, that I think we should have everyone taste how good it is. Especially Ross.
Ross: Yeah, what, what was I thinking?
Chandler: So I have a flaw! Big deal! Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word? And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I mean, what the hell is that thing? ...I accept all those flaws, why can't you accept me for this?
Ross: A 95 LeSabre?!
Ross: Hey, remember when I had a monkey?
Monica: Ross you know that tonight is your date with Hillary?
Ross: What? (She takes the sign off and hands it to him.) Thats great. That is great. (Crumples up the paper and throws it down in anger.) What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
Ross: Hi!
Ross: Wow!
Phoebe: So, did shopping make you feel any better about Ross?
Ross: No, its a concept!
Ross: No.
Ross: Oh yeah? I guess we'll just see!
Ross: So what are you gonna do?
Ross: All right, thats it! (He runs over to Ben, but he runs past him and out the door.) Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is introducing Julie to the gang.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Ross is entering.]
ROSS: Monica, Monica, you could come in straddling him, they still wouldn't believe it. [opens door] We're here.
Ross: So Pheebs, how long is your mom gonna be with us?
Ross: I do have a newfound respect for life.
Phoebe: Ross!!!
Ross: DANGER!!! DANGER!!!!!
Ross: Whats up?
Ross: Okay. Umm, for a while now, I've been wanting to, um....
Ross: Wait! No! Ben, come here! I am not kidding!
Ross: Oh, why dont you make her one of your little jokes.
Ross: Unagi. Im always aware.
Ross: And if you wait right here, Ill go get Ross. (Phoebe grabs his arm and prevents him from escaping.)
Ross: Why not?
Ross: Oh.
Ross: No, Susans gonna be there too. Weve got dads, weve got lesbians, the whole parenting team.
Ross: Okay, Ill see you later pal.
Ross: And the place looks so nice!
Ross: Im gonna get you to talk to Chandler.
Ross: Oh man! I want that place so much!! I was so sure that was gonna work! There's twelve bucks I'll never see again! (Exits.)
Ross: Or you can sit with him on the front porch and make sure no one steals the trash cans. He does that every week too.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Ross and Rachel are talking.]
Ross: Y'know, hey! Youre the one who ended it, remember?
Ross: Its not something you are! Its something you have!
The Flight Attendant: (To Ross) Hope you had a nice flight.
Ross: Look, is Rachel here? I really need to talk to her.
Ross: I played bad on purpose guys.
(Joey looks at Ross with a horrified look on his face.)
Ross: Yes thats right.
Ross: No. No-no. No. What would you do next?
Rachel: Ross, didn't you ah, play soccer in High School? Oh no wait, that's right. You just organized their game schedules on your Commodore 64.
Ross: Ah-ha, nowhere to run! (He starts to run towards them.)
Phoebe: Why is Ross doing that?
Ross: (glaring at Joey) This would be the place where you explain the hat.
Ross: Uh, no, no, see, because not...not all guys are going to be a Paolo.
Ross: DANGER!!!!
Ross: Well with Carol, I promised never to love another woman until the day I die. She made no such promise.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: No suds? Excuse me, hold on a second. (to woman) That's my friend's machine.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler, Rachel, and Joey are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: What?! No! No! Wait! Youre right, this is stupid. Who cares what people think? I mean, I mean we like each other right? Theres nothing wrong with that. Come on. (They get up and go over to the table where his colleagues are sitting.) Burt? Lydia? Mel? This is Elizabeth.
Ross: Hop in. (Phoebe hops in.) Get ready for the smoothest ride of your life.
ROSS: Will you hold Ben for a sec? Come here. Come here.
Ross: (answering it) Uh-oh, saved by the bell. (On phone) Hello?
Ross: You do appear right on the cusp of something. Come on man, I'm sure he'll lose interest in a week or two, but for now can you please just do this for me?
Ross: Why- why are you here, Carol?
Ross: That was you?
Ross: What time?
Ross: (startled) Yeah?
Ross: Hey, thanks Rach. (They hug.)
Ross: Gotcha. (Starts to leave.)
Ross: Oh! So-so seriously, what time?
Ross: Me either... (He pulls up a stool so that he doesn't have to move his hand.)
Chandler: I'll take that bet my friend. And you know what, paying me the 50 bucks could be the "new thing you do that day!" (Ross looks at him.) And it starts right now!
Ross: Yeah, yeah, itll be great! You can, you can lay on the beach and I can cry over my failed marriage. See-see how I make jokes?
Ross: Okay, bye-bye. (starts slamming the receiver down in anger.)
Ross: You're right! (Gives her the twenty she won.)
Chandler: Sure, and Joey; do not let Ross look at any of the maps or the globe in your apartment.
Ross: I have shown you everything we have. Unless you want your mother to spend eternity in a lemon yellow pant-suit, go with the burgundy.
Chandler and Ross: Hey! Hey Adrienne. (They move away from her)
[Scene: A street, Ross is walking with Elizabeth on their date.]
Ross: Umm, no. No.
Joey: Look weve got to find her. Phoebe just called!! Rachels coming to tell Ross she loves him!!
Mona: Id be happy to. (To Ross) You are very sweet.
Ross: Who would you rather be Simon or Garfunkle?