words in movies
Ross: Pheebs, what's wrong?
Ross: So, did he get on one knee, did he have a speech prepared, or (in a tender way) did he cry? (the guys look at him) Yeah, big surprise, I like proposals!
[Scene: Central Perk. Charlie is sitting on the couch and Ross enters.]
Ross: (to Charlie) Hey!
Ross: Guess who's a finalist for a huge research grant! I'll give you a hint, he's looking right at you.
Ross: Oh, I'm so excited, I mean, apparently I beat out hundreds of other applicants, included five guys I went to graduate school with. Not that I'm keeping score or anything... five!
Ross: Well, ok, it's for 25 thousand dollars. And if I get it, I'll finally be able to complete my field research! And there will be an article about me in the "Paleontology Review"! Yeah! That'll be the first time my name is in there, without people raising serious questions about my work!
Ross: Yeah. Why?
Ross: Your ex-boyfriend?
Ross: So, your ex-boyfriend is gonna determine if your new boyfriend gets this grant? Wow, your new boyfriend is screwed!
Ross: Well, if you think it would help.
Ross: Ok, now, is there anything I can do to... you know, butter him up? Anything he really likes?
Ross: We'll see how dinner goes.
[Scene: A restaurant. Ross and Charlie are waiting for her ex-boyfriend, Benjamin Hobart]
Ross: I can't believe I'm about to meet Benjamin Hobart. I've always thought of him as one of the people I'd invite to my fantasy dinner party. Do you think there's any chance he'll bring Christie Brinkley or C3PO?
Ross: Well, I... I am having a good hair day.
Charlie: Me too. (she and Benjamin are hugging for very long and Ross starts pretending to clear his throat, until they stop)
Ross: I'm ok.
Charlie: I'm sorry... (introduces them to each other) Ross Geller... Benjamin Hobart.
Ross: It's an honor to meet you. I can't tell you how long I've been an admirer of your work, I mean, that Nobel prize, (he thumbs up) whoooo! I mean, I have to tell you that, you're one of the reasons I got into the field.
Benjamin: (to Ross) Thank you! (to Charlie). I can't believe that you chose this restaurant! Do you remember the night?
Charlie: Oh my God, I completely forgot! (they laugh) Oh my God! I can't believe they let us back in this place! (they laugh more, and Ross start laughing too).
Benjamin (to Ross): You weren't there!
Ross: No, but, it's, you know, it's just a funny image, you know, the two of you, in this restaurant, with... (laughs nervously)tzz-zzz, mmm.
Charlie: Ross, why don't you tell Benji about your proposal, while I go to the ladies room?
Ross: Ok well, I would like to do a dig in the painted desert.
Ross: See, there are still several areas that haven't been fully excavated.
Ross: What?
Ross: Did you just say "break up with Charlie"?
Ross: Kind of inappropriate, don't you think?
Ross: Are you serious?
Ross: No!
[Scene: Interview room. Ross and two other professors (one man, one woman) are sitting on one side of a long desk. Benjamin Hobart is sitting on the other side]
Ross: (Rolls his eyes) I guess!
Ross: (shocked and confused by the question) What? I... I... (Benjamin looks at him as if to say "What's wrong? Answer the question")
Ross: (annoyed) May 12th?
Benjamin: (looks surprised and un-impressed) That's not even kinda close! (Ross looks around confused) Dr. Li, how many graduate students you'd be needing?
Ross: (even more shocked) Wha..? I need 6 graduate students.
Ross: Wha...? Wait, wait, wait, just a minute. None of my questions have anything to do with Paleontology.
Ross: (annoyed) um... I've never heard of a "Boscodictiasaur".
Ross: (stares at him angrily) Ok. (determined to spell it correctly) B - O - S ...
Ross: Oh come on!!
[Scene: Ross' office. Ross is pacing and Benjamin enters]
Ross: Oh hi! Hello! Uh, have you come to ask me some more paleontology related questions? Uhm... your grandmother's nickname, perhaps? (Now yelling) Aunt Margaret's pants size?
Ross: (Sarcastic) No! Stop!
Ross: (Skeptical) Really?
Ross: I have to break up with Charlie?
(Ross shakes his head)
Ross: You're crazy.
Ross: Crazy!
Ross: (Yelling) Get out! (Benjamin leaves)
[Scene: Central Perk. Some time later that day. The group has left and Charlie is there when Ross enters.]
Ross: Your ex-boyfriend is insane.
Ross: No I didn't, and you want to know why? Because your ex-boyfriend is still in love with you.
Ross: Yeah. He wouldn't give me the grant, because I wouldn't give you up.
Ross: Really? Is it ethical to ask someone in a grant review, who was the voice of "Underdog"?
Charlie: I'm sure he was just joking, Ross.
Ross: If you don't believe me, let's go talk to him, okay? I'm telling you, he didn't ask me one paleontological question.
Ross: Oh, I'm sorry, no. He did ask me one. Uhm... How do you spell Mboscodictiosaur?
Ross: Damnit!
[Scene: Benjamin's office. Ross and Charlie are entering.]
Ross: I want you to tell her everything. About the deal you tried to make with me, about the crazy questions you... Wally Cox! That's the voice of Underdog!
Benjamin: Like I tried to tell you in the interview Ross, this grant is not based on your knowledge of pretty useless trivia.
Ross: No, no, no. Don't do that! I want you to look her in the eyes, and tell her the truth.
Ross: Too little, too late, Benji!
Ross: (indignant) No!
Ross: What?
Ross: or...
Ross: Sweetie, this conversation is starting to make me a little uncomfortable.
Ross: Okay, that's it. WE ARE SEEING OTHER PEOPLE!
Ross: I knew all I had to do was let the material speak for itself. Everyones all, "Ross you have to be funny and sexy." Well, I proved them wrong! And now, Im gonna pass the news onto Joey and Chandler.
Ross: Ok now, remember, when you get to the museum, Monet is not spelt M-O-N-A-Y. I just... I wrote that out phonetically for you.
Ross: Well, I lost. Some little girl loaned her uniform to her nineteen year old sister, who went down to the U.S.S. Nimitz, and sold over 2,000 boxes.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, the cookie trying period has pasted. Monica, Phoebe, and Ross are reflecting on the days events.]
Ross: Oh yeah, I'm sure he's gonna give you a job. Maybe make you his SEXretary.
Ross: Sorry, Im kinda keeping this one on the Q.T.
(Rachel shows Ross the definition on the dictionary, giving him a smug look; then she squints at the dictionary, as though unsure what to make out of it)
Rachel: No! Ross, no! It is not fine! Eh-eh-according to my plan I should already be with the guy I wanna marry!
(Ross leans in and kisses her. They both look at each other for a moment, and then embrace in a more passionate kiss, only to be interrupted by Joey and Chandler coming outside.)
Ross: (pause) Ross? I... I grew up on your block! We had Thanksgiving together last year... I had a baby with your sister!
Ross: By using CT scans and computer imaging we can in a very real way, bring the Mesozoic era into the 21st century.
Ross: Hi! Yeah! Tommys in line for the bathroom and someone just cut in front of him, I think hes gonna snap. (Hes watching very intently)
Ross: Hey, hey, it's fine. It's totally fine. We've got plenty of margaritas. It's all good.
Ross: They're still, they're still not coming on man and the lotion and the powder have made a paste!
Ross: Monica's right, swing dancing can be tricky. I'm gonna use the phone. I gotta cancel those five giant teddy bears I sent to Emily. (Looks at the rose mulch.) My God, think of the massacre.
Ross: (from the floor) Keep pushing!
Ross: Get him! GET HIM! Get him! Get- YESSS! Not laughing now, are ya pal!
Ross: (enters) Wow, couples who live together do start to look alike. So, Mondler...uh, what uh, what cha doin?
Ross: Oh-oh, Rach! I was just messin around! (Shes stunned) Like you did last night when I had to pee?
Ross: Oh-oh yeah, you-you came up to me and asked if I could do you a favor, and my Uncle Murray came up to you and handed you a check. And then you said, "Why do they call it a check? Why not a Yugoslavian?" (Chandler laughs.) Yeah, then you did that.
Ross: (sees the chick) Ohhh, hey! All right, listen, I-I have that TV thing in like two hours, and I need your help, okay? What do you think? (takes out two suits) This blue suit, or this brown one?
[Ross grabs the gas can he brought along, and walks through Joeys sign destroying it.]
Ross: Hey, I am not unemployed. Im on sabbatical!
Ross: (entering) Hey! So ah, what did the insurance company say?
ROSS: Yeah, but not very well, unless 14-across, 'Gershwin musical' actually is bitemebitemebitemebiteme.
(Ross is dumbfounded to see Mike instead of David)
Ross: (now fully awake) Are we really in Montreal?!
Ross: I gotta say, I have not had sex a lot of times before, this is the worst ever.
Ross: (outside her room, talking by himself) Haven't had sex in four months, I should get a medal for that!
Ross: Right, so that's a firm "no". I cannot believe this, I just keep striking out.
Ross: Par-tay!
Ross: ... and while there are certainly vast differences between these Mesozoic fossiles and the example of Homo erectus...
Ross: Oh. Yeah. (Sarcastically) Uh Chandler let me win. No, Chandlers really strong. Oh my arm is so sore. Oh nurse! (Waddles over to Mona.)
Ross: (covering his ears and screaming) La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la! Okay, okay, yeah, I would have been devastated but, I would still want to be with you. Because its, I mean its you.
Ross: And I'm fine never having heard it... (Rachel looks at Ross in a "why do you say that" manner) Rach, can I... can I see you for a sec?
Ross: What? Of course I did! You uh, you sat next to Sleepy Sleeperson.
ROSS: No no, no no, it's not flashy, not for a Goodfella.
Ross: So honey this uh, this threesome thing umm, I mean how-how are you gonna start to find
ROSS: There might be, a teeny, tiny, possibility.
ROSS: [reluctantly] Can I come over tomorrow and pick up Fluffy Meowington's cat toy.
Chandler: So, Ross and I are going to Disneyland and we stop at this restaurant for tacos. And when I say restaurant, I mean a guy, a hibachi, and the trunk of his car. So Ross has about 10 tacos. And anyway, were on Space Mountain and Ross starts to feel a little iffy.
Ross: (interrupts him) Okay, that's right, yes, but on Hanukkah, uh, we sing, uh (Sings) Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, I made you out of clay.
Ross: (with a frozen smile on his face, realizing something's wrong with Jarvis) Ok... now... now we're just holding hands! (pulls his hand away)
Ross: The test is ready.
Ross: Ah, so then his plane didn't explode in a big ball of fire?... Just a dream I had- but, phew.
Chandler: Because weddings are a great place to meet women, and when I dance, I look like this (Starts to dancing really, really, really badly. Ross enters behind him and he stops.)
Ross: It felt like a 'big guy' moment.
Elizabeth: Bye Ross.
Ross: Here's my retainer!
(Monica passes the Envelopes on to Ross, Joey and Rachel.)
Ross: At least I know she's not going out with me to get into R rated movies.
ROSS: Wow, it, it's neat learning about submarines.
Ross: Oh my God! Im sorry, I was talking to this nurse, completely forgot.
Phoebe: nothing, I'm excited about our date, Mike this is Ross Geller this is Mike Haaaaa (starts crying)
Ross: Its a clown kit! Clown kit!
Emily: Ross, I'm only ringing to say stop harassing my relatives. Good-bye!
Ross and Rachel: (bowing) Hello!
Ross: Well, it turns out that she is going to Daytona for spring break woo-hoo. That means, that means wet T-shirt contests, guys doing shots off of girls bodies, waking up next to people you dont even know
Ross: Well, you may wanna steer clear of the word 'dumped'. Chances are he's gonna be this, this broken shell of a man, y'know, so you should try not to look too terrific, I know it'll be hard. Or, y'know, uh, hey!, I'll go down there, and I'll give Barry back his ring, and you can go with Carol and Susan to the OB/GYN...
ROSS: This screen is amazing, I mean Dick Van Dyke is practically life-size.
Rachel: Ross, you know what? She may need one..We're just going to have to make our peace with that!
Ross: I feel great. I feel- great, I fleel great.
Ross: (after a short hesitation) Fine.
ROSS: KARL!
Ross: With such a sad history.
Rachel: Ross, get over it! Its not like she hates you.
Ross: She didnt photograph well!
Ross: (looking astonished) What? NO! I am not going to give them Ben!
Ross: Come on you guys, it's no big deal! (He turns around and shows him his thing.)
Ross: Uhhhhhh that-that may be weird.
Ross: Oh, guys, you should've seen him. 'Read 'em and weep.'
Ross: Yes, it's a deadly but beautiful sport. (Does a karate chop, then does a little dance-type sway.)
Ross: Well, Chandlers my oldest friend, but Joeys myNo! Ah! (points at Rachel)
Ross: Well, not really. I mean technically its-its not against the rules or anything, but it is frowned upon. Especially by that professor we ran into last night, Judgey von Holierthanthou.
Ross: We got honourable mention in the brother/sister dance category! Look, its almost fake midnight, do we really have any other choice?
Ross: (speaking without pause, agitated) Oh yeah? Yeah? I wonder why? What could that smarmy letch possibly want?
Ross: (staring at Susan) You've tasted it? You've tasted it.
Ross: Doorknob! Doorknob!
Ross: Its a rug. (Jill winces.)
Ross: Okay, uh, about last night, um, Chandler.. you didn't tell... (Joey shakes his head) Okay, 'cause I'm thinking- we don't need to tell Chandler, I mean, it was just a kiss, right? One kiss? No big deal? Right?
Ross: you know I really admire your whole dating attitude, it's so healthy I'm always like is this moving to fast? Is this moving to slow? Where's this going?
Ross: I-I'm, I'm having a boy?
ROSS: [condescendingly] Dysprosium? Try mendelevium.
[The next clip is from The One Where Ross Finds Out]
(Paul reveals his presence by laughing, thus concluding standard sitcom joke 2B. Paul then pulls Ross aside to have a little chat with him and tells the rest of the group that hell just be one second.)
Ross: No! No! NotI dont mean I-I see her as a twelve-year-old girl! I mean I-I have a son, whos umm six and I still think of him as a baby.
Ross: (happily) Oh. (Realizes then sadly) Oh. Well I uh, I brought her some bloemen. (Flowers in Dutch.)
Ross: I thought it was gonna be a closed casket.
Ross: Huh? I know, I know. Who am I? David Bowe? (Shakes his head around, pretending like hes jamming.)
Phoebe: Okay, I know. Hold on. (She walks over to the couch.) Hey Ross?
Ross: So do I. (Slowly walks in.) Okay Rach, before anything happens (He takes off his coat) I just want to lay down a couple of ground rules. (Turns back to face her.) This is just about tonight. I don't to go through with this if it's going to raise the question of "Us." (Rachel's confused) Okay? I just want this to be (Kicks off his left shoe) about what it is! (Kicks off the other one.)
Ross: No anchovies.
Ross: 'Pwease, Aunt Monica, pwease?' Oh, unclench. You're not even gonna be there.
Ross: The first date we've had in months, and they were both such disasters.
Joey: Oh uh, me and Ross can be the judges.
Ross: Look. Look, I wasnt going to say anything to you, but... All right, I dont think you should be seeing Tommy anymore.
Ross: 'That thing'? This is how you greet guests at a party? Let me ask you something, if I showed up here with my new girlfriend, she wouldn't be welcome in your home?
Joey: Hello! (Listens.) Oh yeah! (To Chandler) It's the apartment manager; Ross put us down as references. (To the apartment manager.) Ross is the greatest guy you'll ever meet! Yeah, he's very reliable.
Joey: (stomps on the footrest which pops Ross up into a sitting position) The trail from the woman you did it with to the woman you hope never finds out who did it! (slapping his hands with each word) You always have to think about the trail!
Ross: Do you know the word crapweasel?