words in movies
Ross: Y'know if we ever go to war and youre captured, youre in for a big surprise.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are sitting on the couch playing cards, and Phoebe is working on a new song.]
Ross: Oh, you could just go uh, "greatest of ease (plays air guitar) BAH-bah-bha-bhannn." Then go right into it.
Ross: Well umm, yknow, I used to play.
Ross: Yeah, just a little in high school, but then I really got into it in college. I mean thats-thats when I really found my sound.
(Monica is taking a drink as Ross says that, laughs, and snorts her drink.)
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, well its-its really personal stuff, yknow?
Ross: No, you guys, I mean my keyboards are all the way up inNo, yeah, okay. (Runs out.)
[Cut to later that same day, Ross has retrieved his keyboard and is about to debut, "The Sound."]
Ross: Okay, guys.
Ross: Here we go. (Plays one note) Yknow, Ive-Ive never played my stuff for anyone before, so its important that-that you understand its about communicating very private emotions. (Plays another note) Yknow, umm, you should-you should think of umm, my work as wordless sound poems. Thats what Im
(Ross starts to play. He plays a key that has a back beat sound attached to it. Over the background music he plays the sound of a barking dog, a mooing cow, a laser beam, someone coughing, a jackhammer, a doorbell, a police siren, a ray gun, breaking dishes, and for a closer he plays the sound of a loud crash. Basically, the music sucks.)
Ross: Really?! I mean, really?!!
Ross: Wow! Thanks, you guys. Thats uhohhh, I wanna, I wanna play you another piece! Umm! Uh-oh! I left my uh, helicopter sounds on another disk. Ill be right back! Okay? (Runs to fetch them) This is so nice, ImI am so (starts to break up and leaves)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is performing, his music hasnt improved.]
Ross: (His voice is altered to sound like a computer.) Electrifying. (He plays the sound of a ticking clock.) Emphatic time-time-time
[cut back to Ross who finally finishes his so-called song with the same crash from before. He gets some applause, mainly cause hes done.]
Ross: (with the altered voice) Thank you guys-guys-guys
Phoebe: I cant follow Ross! Itd be like those bicycle ridding chimps that followed The Beetles. No.
Monica: Phoebe, Ross sucks!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross has just finished playing.]
Ross: (to Phoebe) Hey!
Ross: Oh, thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you dont want to play anymore because me and y'know my talent. Is that true?
Ross: Pheebs
Ross: See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music. Yknow my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then I I wont play anymore.
Ross: Yeah, okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Monica are sitting on the couch and Phoebe is getting coffee as Chandler enters. Ross is also there.]
Ross: Hey Chandler! Saw the new furniture. Very nice.
Ross: What?
Ross: No the-the sad thing is, if you had told him how you felt before you kissed her, knowing Joey, he probably just wouldve just stepped aside.
Ross: Well, I said-I said something to Phoebe.
Ross: Hey, would it be okay if I wrote a song about this.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is playing his music. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
(Ross finally finishes with the same crash, and gets some applause.)
Ross: Thank you, thanks. (Sits down next to the girls) Yeah, I lost it. Yknow, Im not gonna play anymore, (to Phoebe) would you, can you finish my set?
(Phoebe gets up and goes to play, Ross goes over and sits down next to Monica and Rachel.)
Ross: Yeah, like I could lose it.
Ross: I played bad on purpose guys.
Ross: Yeahno, just that last song.
Gary: Ross!
Mona: Hi! Hi. Hi, Rachel! (to Ross) Whats she doing here?
Ross: My friend Bethel rescued him from some lab.
Ross: You need me to go down there with you and hold your hand?
Ross: What is it?
Ross: Wow, uh, Joey that's-that's great. Thanks man.
Ross: What? What? What? What is it?
Ross: Uh-huh. (Phoebe grunts.)
Ross: Uh-huh. Thank Joey!
Rachel: I would love to live with you Ross; thats-thats great! Thank you!
Joey: (To Ross) You okay man?
Ross: All right! All right! It was the best nap ever!
Ross: Well, Im-Im just glad I could, yknow, help you out.
[Phoebe turns back around but Rachel is gone. Ross enters.]
Ross: (coming back in) Did you say something?
Gary: (To Ross) Okay, go ahead.
Ross: Wow! I could've died tonight.
Ross and Joey: Bye!
Ross: She was blonde? (he looks surprised for a while, but then gets a "gotcha" expression on his face... There's knocking at the door.) Just a sec.! Okay, okay. This one's name is Sandy. She's got a degree in early childhood education, uhm... she worked for her last family for three years.
Ross: (getting angry) That said it was my sandwich?!
ROSS: Humm, that sounds, I don't, perfect.
Ross: That's okay, Joe.
Phoebe: Wow! Im-Im so happy for you guys. (To Ross) This is so-so, not stupid.
Ross: You talked to her?
Ross: Wow!
Ross: Okay, look, yesterday I would've even considered calling her back, but my ex-wife calls on the same day I have a near death experience. I mean, that-that has got to mean something!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is complaining about Carol.]
Ross: Well, okay, what-what did she say?
Ross: Huh.
Ross: I cant believe in four weeks theyre gonna be married!
Ross: Oh, be-because of the leather pants.
Joey: No, come on Ross! (He grabs his bag so he cant leave) Look, Ross, we have to get past this.
Ross: (on machine) "Hey Ross, it's you!" (Hits the stop button) Oh yeah, no that's-that's an old message, nobody needs to hear that.
Ross: We, we just decided to uh, to go for it.
Ross: (entering, downtrodden) Hi.
Ross: Someone at work ate my sandwich!
Ross: And for the record, it took two people to break up this relationship!!
(Ross is stunned.)
Ross: Oh, ah, you dont need that.
Ross: Hero, I uh, I dont knowwell, all right.
Joey: Yeah, hero sandwiches. (Points at Ross who points back.)
Ross: Nevermind! (Goes back to his mailbox.)
Ross: And she just gave you this?
Ross: (barely containing himself at this point) Well, you have fun tonight.
Ross: Oh no-no-no, Im there.
Ross: Are you serious?!
Ross: (looks at his watch) 2:17.
Joey and Ross: No.
Ross: I dont think you had an open mind about the name Ruth. I mean, come on, little Ruthie Geller, how-how cute is that?
Ross: Yeah, no one talks like that!
Joey and Ross: Yeah!
ROSS: [uncomfortable] Good, so everybody's here. Everybody's good. So, were you gonna play something, Phoebe?
Ross: What-what is it?!
Ross: (to Caitlin) Hey uh, y'know that smell gas has?
Ross: Who the hell is Jordie?
Ross: Yeah? How much?
Ross: ON A CAT??!!!!
Ross: Wow! I thought you would be a little more shocked.
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: What?
Ross: I know! (Looks at the ball in his hands.) Don't switch hands, okay?
Ross: Uhh, yeah it would! Let's do it!
Ross: I dont know, I told her it was stupid to put off the wedding just because the hall was gone and she liked flipped out.
Ross: Yknow what I think it is? I think youve made such a nice home for her over the last nine months that she just doesnt want to leave.
ROSS: I, I know it's big, I just didn't know it was uh, ha-ha big.
Ross: Well, who's gonna kiss my sister.
Ross: Lady, he is people. He has a name, okay? He watches Jeopardy! He he touches himself when nobody's watching. Please, please have a heart!
Ross: How do you know? You don't have a watch.
Emily: No, no, no Ross! Ross, these are friends of mine from home. (Introducing them) Liam, Devon, this is Ross.
Rachel: Pheebs, I would make a reservation for five, because one of us has to stay home and watch Emma. (to Ross:) Which one of us should go to dinner?
Ross: Hey Rach!
Ross: Monica, whatever you do, do not drop that ball!
Ross: 2 hours, 27 minutes.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Well, her thought is, and I agree, fresh new furniture, why not a fresh new apartment? Her cousin has this great place to sublet, it's got a view of the river on one side and Columbia on the other.
Ross: Okay, theres this guy, Warren, from the museum and hes going on a dig for like two years and hes got this great place he needs to sublet. So uh, you interested?
Ross: Yes! Were getting married?!
Ross: Yeah, it's, it's, it's cute. Why, why, why does he have it, again?
Ross: Yeah. (He does so and Phoebe hugs him.)
Ross: (he bounds into the lounge room) But you didn't! I'm still alive!! Kori, I know this is a big surprise for you. It's a long story but the things you just said really made my day! I mean, the fact that you are here means more to me than if this room were filled with people!
Rachel: Okay... aahhh... Please laugh for mommy... Please? Please laugh for mommy... (Rachel makes a funny face, sticking her tongue out, making a farting noise and using her hands as antlers, wiggling her fingers... No response from Emma...) Not funny huh? Oh so, is it... only offensive novelty rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? 'Cause mommy can rap... (Rachel tries to rap and makes weird movements with her arms in the process.) My name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are... Oh, I can't rap... Allright sweetheart... This is only because I love you so much, and I know that you're not gonna tell anybody... (Rachel's face is telling "Oh what am I doing? The things I have to go through... and she starts to rap) I like... big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... / when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face... (Emma starts to laugh) Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh! Oh! (Rachel now really gets into it, and her insecure movements start getting better) I like big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... Oh Emma you're laughing! Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little weirdo... (Rachel picks up Emma and Ross now enters)
Ross: Yeah, he-hes right, hes right. This is your time y'know, yeah, youre young, youre-youre weird, chicks dig that.
Ross: Anyway, they want me to go down to this- sonogram thing with them tomorrow.
Chandler: If you clear things up with Rachel then Ross never needs to find out, but you have to do it now before he hears about it and kicks your ass!
Monica: Mira, Ross, Marcel se llevo el control remoto. (Look, Ross, Marcel's got the remote.)
Ross: Oh hey, Gary, want me to grab the berry for ya?
Ross: Oh, thank God!
Ross: I am!
Monica: Now, Mom, everything's going fine, really. (Listens) Yeah, Ross is great. He's uh, he's in a whole other place. (Listens) No, he's gone. (Listens) No no, you don't have to fly back, really. (Listens) What do you mean this might be your only chance? (Listens) Would you stop? I'm only 26, I'm not even thinking about babies yet.
Ross: Come on Rach, you dont have what, ten minutes?
Chandler: (With the covers pulled up to his chin.) Morning, Ross.
(Ross turns to look at Joey.)
[Scene: Jen's apartment, Ross is picking her up for their date.]
Joey: Look Ross, I am so-so sorry. I-I-I
Ross: Oh God, here we go!
Ross: What's going on?
Ross: Wow! You look nice. What's the occasion?
Joey: Hey Ross listen Chandler got you out of going to the lesbian sandwich museum this weekend!
Ross: It's really a uh-uh three person game, y'know?
Ross: No! No! I didnt do that. Its just Okay, honestly no. I dont, I dont see a big future with her.