words in movies
Ross: Y'know if we ever go to war and youre captured, youre in for a big surprise.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are sitting on the couch playing cards, and Phoebe is working on a new song.]
Ross: Oh, you could just go uh, "greatest of ease (plays air guitar) BAH-bah-bha-bhannn." Then go right into it.
Ross: Well umm, yknow, I used to play.
Ross: Yeah, just a little in high school, but then I really got into it in college. I mean thats-thats when I really found my sound.
(Monica is taking a drink as Ross says that, laughs, and snorts her drink.)
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, well its-its really personal stuff, yknow?
Ross: No, you guys, I mean my keyboards are all the way up inNo, yeah, okay. (Runs out.)
[Cut to later that same day, Ross has retrieved his keyboard and is about to debut, "The Sound."]
Ross: Okay, guys.
Ross: Here we go. (Plays one note) Yknow, Ive-Ive never played my stuff for anyone before, so its important that-that you understand its about communicating very private emotions. (Plays another note) Yknow, umm, you should-you should think of umm, my work as wordless sound poems. Thats what Im
(Ross starts to play. He plays a key that has a back beat sound attached to it. Over the background music he plays the sound of a barking dog, a mooing cow, a laser beam, someone coughing, a jackhammer, a doorbell, a police siren, a ray gun, breaking dishes, and for a closer he plays the sound of a loud crash. Basically, the music sucks.)
Ross: Really?! I mean, really?!!
Ross: Wow! Thanks, you guys. Thats uhohhh, I wanna, I wanna play you another piece! Umm! Uh-oh! I left my uh, helicopter sounds on another disk. Ill be right back! Okay? (Runs to fetch them) This is so nice, ImI am so (starts to break up and leaves)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is performing, his music hasnt improved.]
Ross: (His voice is altered to sound like a computer.) Electrifying. (He plays the sound of a ticking clock.) Emphatic time-time-time
[cut back to Ross who finally finishes his so-called song with the same crash from before. He gets some applause, mainly cause hes done.]
Ross: (with the altered voice) Thank you guys-guys-guys
Phoebe: I cant follow Ross! Itd be like those bicycle ridding chimps that followed The Beetles. No.
Monica: Phoebe, Ross sucks!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross has just finished playing.]
Ross: (to Phoebe) Hey!
Ross: Oh, thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you dont want to play anymore because me and y'know my talent. Is that true?
Ross: Pheebs
Ross: See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music. Yknow my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then I I wont play anymore.
Ross: Yeah, okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Monica are sitting on the couch and Phoebe is getting coffee as Chandler enters. Ross is also there.]
Ross: Hey Chandler! Saw the new furniture. Very nice.
Ross: What?
Ross: No the-the sad thing is, if you had told him how you felt before you kissed her, knowing Joey, he probably just wouldve just stepped aside.
Ross: Well, I said-I said something to Phoebe.
Ross: Hey, would it be okay if I wrote a song about this.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is playing his music. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
(Ross finally finishes with the same crash, and gets some applause.)
Ross: Thank you, thanks. (Sits down next to the girls) Yeah, I lost it. Yknow, Im not gonna play anymore, (to Phoebe) would you, can you finish my set?
(Phoebe gets up and goes to play, Ross goes over and sits down next to Monica and Rachel.)
Ross: Yeah, like I could lose it.
Ross: I played bad on purpose guys.
Ross: Yeahno, just that last song.
Ross: Permission to veto.
Ross: (from outside the bathroom) Hello?
Ross: Well In-in case of emergency.
Monica: I dont know! Time to kiss a guy maybe?! (Ross laughs.) What are you laughing at Pampers? (He stops laughing and glares at her.)
Ross: The one that always stares at me when I come in?
[Scene: The Recovery Room, Ross is taking pictures of Rachel holding the baby as the rest of the gang enters.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Ross, Monica, and now Chandler are still playing catch. The guys are exhausted and sitting around the room. Monica is still standing all pumped up and being hyper-competitive yet again. {Okay! We get it! She's competitive!! Must we see all the time?!}]
Ross: (not paying attention) Yeah, they dont like you.
Ross: No, wait ! You guys, no, no, you can't leave! Rachel already feels bad that the cake's messed up. How do you think she's gonna feel when she comes back here and all you guys are gone?
Ross: A lot of people are thankful for those. < knock on door>
[Cut to Ross in one of those British phone booths.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Hello! I'm in the front seat, okay? I'm Gary's partner!
Joey: Hey Ross! The babys kicking!
ROSS: Well because I have to work on Monday, I have a big presentation.
Ross: I was talking to myself! Youre going down!
Ross and Rachel while looking at each other surprised and shocked: Jill?
Rachel: Ross, I'm telling you, she's giving up getting her eyebrows (points at her own to emphasize the word) shaped to do this alright? Do you understand how important that is in our world?
Ross: No! For all I know, shes trying to find me but couldnt because I kept moving around. No, from now on, Im staying in one place. (He sits down on the bed.) Right here.
[Scene: The museums worker cafeteria, Joey is eating lunch with the rest of the tour guides. Another tour guide tries to sit down in a seat Joey saved for Ross.]
Ross: What? Why? Whats wrong?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are talking to Frank.]
Ross: (rushes in) Is everything okay?
Ross: No IMona!
Joey: (seeing Ross) Oh hey-hey!
Ross: No really, you tell me whats up.
Ross: (To Joey) So, thanks so much for bringing her to the hospital.
Ross: Not for the next few minutes.
<Ross goes into Rachel's room>
Ross: Hey where-where are the pictures that creepy pretzel vendor took of us together?
Ross: Hi. I understand you had a little talk with Emily.
Ross: Well yeah!
Ross: What?! What?! Rach what?!
Ross: Hey uh, I brought you some lunch.
Rachel: Oh Ross!! (Runs to the bathroom and closes the door.)
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: My dad wanted to know if you wanted to play racquetball with us.
Ross: Baby got back (Then Ross turns around and sees their friends standing in the doorway)
Ross: Really?
Monica: Well actually, Ross doesn't.
Phoebe: Ross, please! My make-up! (He walks away angrily.)
Rachel: Ross, please, this is a hospital, ok? That actually means something here.
Ross: You know, Barracuda was the first song I learned to play on the keyboard.
Ross: Uh, Im going to take off.
Ross: What is it?
Ross: Hey, whats behind your back?
Ross: I think Chandlers gone. (He hands her the note.)
Ross: You dont want my opinion?
Ross: (quietly) The red one.
Ross: I whitened them.
Rachel: Look, I am so so happy for you guys, but you getting married just reminds me of the fact that Im not. Im not even close. And I dont know, maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. And I know that thats dumb, but oh my God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler!
Ross: Hey. We-we look we look pretty good.
Ross: Who needs a lease when it's family!
Ross: Veto. Helen?
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Well I dont know umm, (Pause) what if we were too tie each other up? (Carols shocked and obviously doesnt like that idea.) Umm, some people eat stuff off one another. (Carol doesnt like that idea either.) Nah! Umm, yknow we-we could try dirty talk? (Carol still says no.) Umm, we could, we could have a threesome.
Ross: (grabbing the car) Okay! Okay! Okay! (He gets in, but into the back seat.)
Ross: I do too! I missed you!
Ross: Hey! (they hug) So, how was Atlantic City?
Ross: That does make sense. Because I do wanna seize some opportunity, but I-I really don't wanna see or talk to her.
Ross: What?
Ross: (not amused) Huh uh-huh.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: Ever?!
Ross: Hey Amy.
Rachel: Oh Amy, you remember Ross.
Ross: (coming out of the bathroom) Won't you dance around with me.
Ross: Well, Im, uh, going to pick up Mona. What have you got going tonight?
Ross: That was me.
Ross: I think shes lonely.
Ross: I have no idea!
Ross: I know.
Ross: And you thought she was going to be in our way! So, why dont you, uh, open the champagne, and Ill be right back. Ive got a surprise for you.
Ross: So, um- so how's this, uh, how's this gonna work? Y'know, with us? Y'know, when, like, important decisions have to be made?
Ross: Why?! Why on the lips?! (He wipes his mouth on Monicas wrap and walks off, leaving Aunt Millie stunned.)
Chandler: Poor Ross.
Ross with a look of wondering how long this is going to go on on his face: Still me.
[Scene: a NYU lecture hall, Ross is trying to phase out his accent.]
Ross: (laughs) You were backpacking across Western Europe?
Ross: Hey, hey, man!
Ross: Really?!
Ross: Oh, sorry. Well, look, maybe I can help you with it.
Ross: Hey, hey, its me. Why cant you tell me?
Ross: Shes not a Tribbiani?
Ross: Anyway, so, uh, so what is it?
Ross: Why not?
Ross: Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.
Ross: Well, uh, does she like you?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Chandler, and Phoebe are there as Ross enters.]
RACHEL: I'm sorry, what did you just say? Did you just say hi? Oh my God, Ross, Ross, Ben just said 'Hi'.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels. Rachel is standing in front of the TV holding a video.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is talking to Ross]
Ross: Rachel?!
Ross: Um, you you like Rachel?
Ross: (glaring at him) Yeah, thanks. (Joey nods no problem.)
Ross: Rachel whos carrying my baby? Rachel?
Ross: It's an empty apartment.
Ross: Hey.
Ross: Really?! (To Rachel) Hey, yknow what? Since you have such a great sense of what I need, uh ooh, heres-heres 60 bucks, why dont you take Phoebe down to that Colonial flea market of yours and get me some stuff.