words in movies
Ross: Y'know if we ever go to war and youre captured, youre in for a big surprise.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are sitting on the couch playing cards, and Phoebe is working on a new song.]
Ross: Oh, you could just go uh, "greatest of ease (plays air guitar) BAH-bah-bha-bhannn." Then go right into it.
Ross: Well umm, yknow, I used to play.
Ross: Yeah, just a little in high school, but then I really got into it in college. I mean thats-thats when I really found my sound.
(Monica is taking a drink as Ross says that, laughs, and snorts her drink.)
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, well its-its really personal stuff, yknow?
Ross: No, you guys, I mean my keyboards are all the way up inNo, yeah, okay. (Runs out.)
[Cut to later that same day, Ross has retrieved his keyboard and is about to debut, "The Sound."]
Ross: Okay, guys.
Ross: Here we go. (Plays one note) Yknow, Ive-Ive never played my stuff for anyone before, so its important that-that you understand its about communicating very private emotions. (Plays another note) Yknow, umm, you should-you should think of umm, my work as wordless sound poems. Thats what Im
(Ross starts to play. He plays a key that has a back beat sound attached to it. Over the background music he plays the sound of a barking dog, a mooing cow, a laser beam, someone coughing, a jackhammer, a doorbell, a police siren, a ray gun, breaking dishes, and for a closer he plays the sound of a loud crash. Basically, the music sucks.)
Ross: Really?! I mean, really?!!
Ross: Wow! Thanks, you guys. Thats uhohhh, I wanna, I wanna play you another piece! Umm! Uh-oh! I left my uh, helicopter sounds on another disk. Ill be right back! Okay? (Runs to fetch them) This is so nice, ImI am so (starts to break up and leaves)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is performing, his music hasnt improved.]
Ross: (His voice is altered to sound like a computer.) Electrifying. (He plays the sound of a ticking clock.) Emphatic time-time-time
[cut back to Ross who finally finishes his so-called song with the same crash from before. He gets some applause, mainly cause hes done.]
Ross: (with the altered voice) Thank you guys-guys-guys
Phoebe: I cant follow Ross! Itd be like those bicycle ridding chimps that followed The Beetles. No.
Monica: Phoebe, Ross sucks!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross has just finished playing.]
Ross: (to Phoebe) Hey!
Ross: Oh, thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you dont want to play anymore because me and y'know my talent. Is that true?
Ross: Pheebs
Ross: See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music. Yknow my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then I I wont play anymore.
Ross: Yeah, okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Monica are sitting on the couch and Phoebe is getting coffee as Chandler enters. Ross is also there.]
Ross: Hey Chandler! Saw the new furniture. Very nice.
Ross: What?
Ross: No the-the sad thing is, if you had told him how you felt before you kissed her, knowing Joey, he probably just wouldve just stepped aside.
Ross: Well, I said-I said something to Phoebe.
Ross: Hey, would it be okay if I wrote a song about this.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is playing his music. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
(Ross finally finishes with the same crash, and gets some applause.)
Ross: Thank you, thanks. (Sits down next to the girls) Yeah, I lost it. Yknow, Im not gonna play anymore, (to Phoebe) would you, can you finish my set?
(Phoebe gets up and goes to play, Ross goes over and sits down next to Monica and Rachel.)
Ross: Yeah, like I could lose it.
Ross: I played bad on purpose guys.
Ross: Yeahno, just that last song.
Ross: Fine.
Ross: What?
Ross: Hi Gunther.
Ross: Come on! Thats great.
ROSS: I don't, I don't understand. I mean, you, it's like we can't win with you guys.
Ross: Oh, but I've got tickets to the Van Gogh exhibit! I've been waiting like a year for this.
Joey: Oh, hey, Chandler, we, ah, we stopped by the coffee shop and ran into Ross.
Ross: How do you know? I mean we thought Carol was straight before I married her!
Phoebe: Y'know I had a dream where Ross and Rachel were still together, they never broke up. And we were all just like hanging out, and everyone was happy....
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is reading a script as Ross enters]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, its later that morning, everybody has gotten up and Ross and Phoebe has joined them for breakfast. Rachel is returning from shopping.]
Ross: The gas is odorless, but they add the smell so you know when there's a leak.
Rachel: You remember Ross.
Ross: Isabella Rosselini. (points to her)
Ross: Ugh, museum.
Joey: Everything is upside down here! It rains all day long, nobody watches tv and Ross is famous!
ROSS: Yeah, can't help but.
Ross: So?
ROSS: Bye Marcel. See ya on the big screen. You keep people drinkin' that beer, OK. I miss you buddy.
Ross: Thanks again, Dr. Green.
Ross: I know.
Rachel: Ross, you know what? (looks over to the door and sees security staring at them) Okay, let's talk about it later, there comes security. (Takes her box and leaves. Ross follows her and then returns for the chair. He stands for a moment, then pushes it quickly in the general direction Rachel went into, and out of the camera's view, and then nonchalantly walks away)
Ross: Nothing I do means anything, really.
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what are you doing?
Ross: Okay enough! This is, this is not going to happen.
Ross: Well, I don't know, it's-it's kinda in a place that's not... It's not visually accessible to me, and I was hoping maybe you guys could-could help me out. (starts to take off his pants)
Dr. Green: Baby. Ross.
Ross: Look, would you guys grow up? That is the most natural beautiful thing in the world.
Ross: Look, look Im sorry. Its just that....
Ross: Uh.
Ross: May I come in?
Ross: I know that!
Ross: And his first name.
Ross: Thank you! Thats what I keep saying.
Ross: Argue with that.
Monica: If you would stop thinking about Ross for one minute you would notice that there are great guys everywhere! I mean, look! Look, Gunther! (Gunther turns to listen in.) I mean, he's nice, he's cute.
Ross: Excellent!
(Both he and Ross start laughing)
Ross: oh yea now um how is that going, is it getting serious?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Rachel are there as Phoebe and Monica enter.]
Phoebe: Ooh! Oh! (She starts to pluck at the air just in front of Ross.)
Ross: Neither will I. (they both put back the brownies.)
ROSS: Hi, Mrs. Green. [He gets up to shake her hand, but she ignores him.]
Ross: Why? Why cant you go to him?
ROSS: Well we just wanted to stop by and uh, say goodnight.
Rachel: Ross, it took you ten years to finally admit you liked me.
Ross: Yeah.
(They kiss. Ross walks away, and then fades out.)
Ross: Huh... huh... what a loser! Some more wine? (takes the half-full glasses and goes to the counter)
Ross: Hmm?
Joey: Hey-hey, Ross?
Ross: Well Mr. Big Shot is better than wethead.
Monica: (takes the phone from Ross) Come on. (Answering phone) Hello? (Listens) Im sorry you have the wrong number. (Listens) (Whispering) Okay, Ill call you later dad. I love you. (Hangs up.)
ROSS: Oh, you know, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna hang out, work on my music.
Chandler: David, let me stop you there 'cause I think I see where this is going. I'm not very good at giving advice. So if you want advice, go to Ross, Monica, or... Joey, if the thing you wanna advice about is pizza toppings or burning sensation when you pee.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting at the kitchen counter and Ross enters from Rachel and Emma's room.]
Ross: Uh, don't you think that would be a little weird? I mean, two guys in a romantic inn...
ROSS: Hootie and the--oh my. I, I can catch them on the radio.
[Ross enters behind Rachel, and look at each other for a moment.]
Ross: Hmm, a lot of this stuff is from Colonial times. Hey, what are some other time periods Rachel? (She glares at him.)
(Rachel stands up and kisses Ross. He is stunned. A moment of silence follows.)
Ross: Hey, would you ah, would you like some juice?
Ross: (entering) Hey! Everyone.
ROSS: Well maybe, you know, maybe we should stay for one song.
Ross: Hows my little boy?
Ross: Great, actually. I'm thinking tonight, maybe the night. Yeah, I mean ah, the kids are gonna play together and then when they're asleep, I'm thinking Amanda and I break open a bottle of wine, and do a little "playing" ourselves.
ROSS: No, he's at uh, Carol's and Susan's today.
ROSS: Yes, it was horrible. She cried. I cried. She threw things, they hit me. Anyway, I did the right thing.
Ross: Monica did it?
Ross: Monica?
Ross: One. (Rachel gives him the card.)
Ross: (pauses) I'm pretty sure that it is...
Ross: I'm having... I'm having a baby. (jumps back onto the table again) I'm having a... Where's the phone? The phone?
Ross: That's, that's funny. Change!
PHOEBE: Yes, yes, and it's, and we always have to go to, you know, someplace nice, you know? God, and it's not like we can say anything about it, 'cause, like this birthday thing, it's for Ross.
Ross: (to Chandler) Wait-wait, so, you get to be my best man twice and I never get to be yours at all?
Ross: I dont know! I guess I just cant believe any of this is happening.
Ross: Ah, well, it means that I can sell cookies, but Im not invited to sleep-overs.
Rachel: But y'know, I never really had anything to worry about. Ross was never very good at the flirting thing.
Ross: Halftime.
Rachel: Lets do it! Ross?
Monica: Well, maybe you could give to somebody else. Ooh, like Ross Geller.
Ross: What?
Monica and Ross: Yeah.
Ross: (drags Chandler over to buffet table) Im telling you, this guy Rachel is with is crazy! Okay? He viscously screamed at total strangers! I think hes baaad news!
Joey: Oh come on! Just pick one! Between Monica, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross if you had to, if you had to, who would you punch?
Ross: What about the time I said we were on a break?
Ross: Yeah! Anyway, I-I still think we should try to patch things up, yknow? Like uh, maybe we could get him to get tickets to another Knicks game and invite him.
Ross: All right, were gonna play.
Ross: Oh, I've got to go pick up Ben, we've got a play date this afternoon.
Ross: Here you go. (throws her the ball)
Rachel: Ross!
Ross: Sweetie, now I pick you.
Ross: Okay, I know what I have to do. Ive got to go Red Ross. (Joey and Phoebe dont know what hes talking about.) Yknow, Red Ross!
(At this moment Rachel bursts through the door. Needless to say, shes not in the best of moods having just found out Rosss dirty little secret.)
Ross (he buzzes for the nurse) Let's see if we can get that Rachel back here.
Ross: (He opens the door while faking a laugh.) Hey! Oh, we-we can't keep eating like this. (Monica turns her head in shame.)
Ross: Oww!! Son of a...!! Ow! Come on!
Rachel: (coming over to Ross, who is just getting up) Are you okay?
Ross: Come on, lets go!