words in movies
(Ross enters and his hair is a mess.)
Ross: Emily's cousin kicked me out!
Ross: Well, when you're subletting an apartment from your wife's cousin and then you get a divorce, sometimes the cousin suddenly wants his apartment back.
Ross: Who needs a lease when it's family!
Ross: You got it.
Ross: Thanks you guys, I really appreciate this. All right, I'm gonna get packing again. Man, I've been moving around so much I'm beginning to feel like a nomad.
Ross: What?
Rachel: How's Ross doing? Y'know since all the Emily stuff.
Rachel: Oh, honey, please, no, I can't get started with all that Ross stuff again. I mean, he's gonna screwed up for a looong time. And besides y'know, I don't, I don't go for guys right after they get divorced.
Joey: Ross?
Ross: (entering from the bathroom) Hey roomies!
Ross: Oh, yeah I know, I know, it's a lot of boxes, but again I really appreciate you guys letting me stay here.
Ross: Oh, I uh, hope you don't mind, I kinda uh, jazzed it up a little. Check this out. (He plays the greeting, and We Will Rock You starts to play and Ross's voice comes over it.) We will, we will, call you back!
Ross: Pretty cool, huh?
(They both laugh as Ross heads back to the bathroom.)
Joey: Come on, Chandler, Ross is our friend. He needs us right now, so why don't you be a grown up and come and watch some TV in the fort!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's and Ross's, Ross is working on his computer and Joey is making a lot of noise.]
Ross: (glaring at him) Joey, please! (Motions to his computer.)
(Notices Ross looking at him and stops. Ross gives him his 'quiet down' maneuver. Okay, this may take a while to explain, so center this on you screen and place your hands about a foot apart with your fingers together and pointing straight up. Now take you fingers and point them at the other hand and making a 90-degree angle with each of your hands and the first knuckle counting up from the wrist. Now take your right hand, no your other right (that was for the dyslexics), and lower it a couple of inches, so that the fingers are pointing at your wrist. Now take your arms and keeping the elbows bent and your hands in front of you spread out your arms, kinda like making a bird's wing. Now hunch your shoulders over and move you hands up and down as if you are trying to tell some one to turn it down. That's Ross 'quiet down' maneuver. Well, there is an accompanying face, but I don't want to try and describe it as well.)
Chandler: (gasps) All right look, y'know, this maybe tough but come on, this is Ross! I survived college with him!
Ross: (entering) Uh fellas, (Does the maneuver and gives them a double thumbs up, which Chandler returns as he closes the door.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are there. Chandler and Joey are looking through the paper.]
Chandler: Well, I-I-I'm done with this. You want anything Ross? Sports? International? Apartment listings?
Ross: I'll take sports.
Ross: All right. Uhh, international.
Joey: Oh that's mine too! (Grabs it and Ross looks at him.) I'm Italian!
Ross: Well, I guess I can check out those apartment listings, even though there's never anything in here.
Ross: (looks) Oh yeah! You'rehey, you're right! Here's an affordable place, (reading ad) two bedroom, close to work, ooh, it's available in five weeks!
Ross: Oh, I-I don't know, it's kind of expensive for a studio.
Ross: Okay, let's go.
Ross: Oh-oh-ooh, hey guys, I was wondering if you guys would uh, maybe chip in on some new air filters for the air purifier? I mean after all, we all are using it.
Ross: Oh my God! (Looking around, which doesn't take him long.)
Ross: I think this is it. I don't know, maybe we should keep looking.
Joey: But hey, Ross, this place is available now!
Ross: (To Joey) So, you-you think I should go ahead and take this place?
Ross: (To Chandler) How about you?
Ross: All right, I see what you guys are saying. I'll uh, I'll go downstairs and fill out an application.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Joey are lamenting about how they kicked Ross out.]
Joey: Maybe, maybe we did a good thing, helping Ross get back on his feet!
Chandler: About Ross!
Joey: Hello! (Listens.) Oh yeah! (To Chandler) It's the apartment manager; Ross put us down as references. (To the apartment manager.) Ross is the greatest guy you'll ever meet! Yeah, he's very reliable.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross still has boxes all over the place. Joey is wearing a football helmet, and Chandler is spinning him around in one of the chairs and counting.]
(Ross enters.)
Ross: Hey. So I uh, I didn't get that apartment. Some problem with my application.
Ross: Yeah. But, the good news is that Phoebe said that I could stay at her place for a while. So
Joey: But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!
Ross: Look, you guys don't need me here taking up your space.
Ross: Are you guys sure about this?
Chandler: Yes! Ross, you have to stay!
Ross: All right.
Ross: So I'm a pimp huh? It's okay! Look, I know that sometimes I can be a pain in the ass, but you just have to talk to me. Tell me if something is bothering you. Okay? And for my part I will do everything I can to keep my annoying habits just (Does the 'quiet down' maneuver).
(Chandler and Joey smile, but when Ross turns away look at each other with looks of horror.)
Ross: (popping up behind Joey wearing an Indian headdress) Come on, it's fun!
ROSS: Dad, she won't want to go with me.
ROSS: Yeah, well.
Joey: Its Ba-go-ta, but close enough. Now, you can either pass your turn to Ross or pick a Wicked Wango card.
Ross: Mine stole my newspaper! Its like a crime wave!! (Monica runs to make more candy.) Pheebs, you uh, you got a second.
Ross: Okay. (goes out onto the balcony)
Ross: (gets up) All right. Y'know what? We dont have to go downstairs! We can bring Vegas up to us! (He grabs a deck of cards and pulls up a chair.) All right, come on, come on, we'll play some blackjack. Here we go. (Deals the cards.) 13.
Ross: No I left the diapers at the hospital! Theres some in the bag but Ill run out and get some more.
Elizabeth: (To Ross) You want some?! (Starts to squirt the Kamikaze at him.)
ROSS: Bye guys.
(Ross turns around and sees Rachel sitting by the window. She is just glaring at him.)
Phoebe: Well, I would love to but the bike got stolen and the police have no suspects. (Ross just happens to have his hand on a sheet that is covering something that suspiciously looks like a bike.)
Chandler: Yes, and while I'm doing that, Ross has a great computer story for you.
[ROss approaches Rachel at counter.]
Monica: (to Ross)So, did you come by to watch us win the big bucks?
Ross: Well, I tried! But when I got to my lawyers office all I could hear was, "Three divorces. Three divorces!" Look, I just dont want my tombstone to read, Ross Gellar, Three Divorces.
ROSS: Oh.
ROSS: Hey, someone order a coat?
Rachel: (To Ross) You know what? We should call my mum's house and say goodnight to Emma before she goes down.
Joey, Chander, and Ross: Sorry.
ROSS: What, what.
ROSS: Mon.
ROSS: Mon.
ROSS: [enters] Ok, what the hell happened back there?
ROSS: And that's, that's funny why?
ROSS: No.
ROSS: No.
ROSS: No.
Rachel: So Ross, we went out for two years, and you never told me you were in an I Hate Rachel club.
Joey: Hey Ross, listen, you know that right now, your baby's only this big? (measures about 2 inches with his thumb and index finger) This is your baby. (in baby-like voice) Hi Daddy!
Rachel: Now wait a minute thats not fair. He was married to me a hell of a lot longer than he was married to Emily, he just didnt tell me. (Everyone looks at her, Ross not happily.) Maybe I have to pee again. (Gets up to try to use the bathroom.)
ROSS: That's romantic.
[Ross enters]
ROSS: Hey.
Ross: I can't believe this, she's our daughter! That you would treat her like some kind of showdog is inexcusable!
Ross: No!! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn't know, how should I know?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Mrs. Green is telling Ross what needs to be done to baby proof his apartment.]
ROSS: Yeah. I don't know, I've been wanting this since like ninth grade typing, ya know. And I just want it to be perfect and right and. . . why isn't that laser beam cutting through the paint?
ROSS: Hey.
[Rachel and Ross enter]
ROSS: Come on, tell me.
[Scene: The Banquet Room, Chandler is under one of the tables as Ross enters.]
(Ross wakes up with a start and startles Rachel. The guy next to him starts laughing, which starts Ross laughing, Rachel gives him a look and he stops.)
Ross: Oh no! It could be better, but its gonna be okay, right?
Ross: Perhaps. Now Im curious, at what point during those girlish screams would you have begun to kick my ass?
ROSS: Rach.
ROSS: No, no, we won't.
RACHEL: Ross, you have planned out the next 20 years of our lives, we've been dating for six weeks.
ROSS: Sorry.
Paul: (standing in front of a mirror and to himself) Just relax. Just relax Paul, youre doing great. (Ross moves a piece of luggage over so he can watch Paul.) She likes you. She Maybe, she likes you. She likes you. Yknow why? Because youre a (pause) neat guy. (Ross cant believe what hes hearing.) You are the man. You are (pause) the man! (He opens his shirt and looks at his chest.) I still got it. Nice and sexy. Youre just a love machine. (Starts singing) Im just a love machine and I wont work for nobody but you! Hey bab-y! (Flexes and grunts loudly.) Showtime. (Starts to leave and starts singing.) Im just a love machine, yeah ba-by! (Grunts again and Ross is stunned.)
ROSS: I'm done.
Rachel: Well-well, I dont know Rossreally?
[Scene: Dr. Rhodes's Office, a rather large group of doctors has now gathered to take a look at Ross's thing. Ross is none too pleased with the developments, he has a disgusted look on his face.]
Ross: No, women are welcome to play.
ROSS: C'mon, what, you never think about our future?
Ross: Yeah, I really do. Yeah, but what am I gonna do, I mean we-we both agreed that it was gonna be a two-week thing, yknow no commitment.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Joey, and Monica are sitting on the couch as Ross is up getting some coffee.]
ROSS: What? What's on your shoulder?
Rachel: Well, I... you know, I-I-I don't know what to say... I mean, I never thought of you as a guy who needed his men to be men. You know, 'cause I gotta tell you Ross, it not like you just came in from branding cattle.
ROSS: A tattoo? Why, why would you want to do that? [to Rachel] Hi.
ROSS: Are you trying to get me to bribe you?
ROSS: Alright, shall we?
ROSS: Hi ma.
Ross: (in a mocking voice)Uh...sure I do, and I also wanna be King of my own country and find out what happened to Amelia Earhart.
[Time lapse. The girls have Ross pinned face down. Phoebe is sitting on his back and arms while holding his head down and facing Rachel. Rachel is sitting on his knees and holding his lower legs vertically, causing Ross pain.]
Joey: Have a nice six more months Ross! (Starts to leave.)
Ross: Ow! Ow! Okay, okay, fine, fine! All right, you wanna win by cheating, go ahead, all right. Phoebe the touchdown does count, you win.
ROSS: No, no, I mean, ya know, I, I read a book and there was a girl named Emily and I thought, I thought that might be good.
ROSS: Dad, you really don't want to do that.
RACHEL: Yes I do, it's just that Ross is. . .
Ross: So, your ex-boyfriend is gonna determine if your new boyfriend gets this grant? Wow, your new boyfriend is screwed!
Ross: But also knowing it means a lot.
ROSS: The big book of childrens' names.
Phoebe: Oh, you guys! We've got to keep all the tickets together (takes the bowl from Ross and puts it on the table)
RACHEL: Ok, Ross, Ross, ok listen, what we have is amazing.
RACH: Ross kissed me.
ROSS: Yeah.
ROSS: Mon, Mon, are you OK?
ROSS: Eww.
ROSS: Look at that, they won't even turn their heads.
ROSS: Ohh.
Chandler: Ross! You gotta stop! Okay?! You cant just stare through the peep hole for three hours! Youre gonna get peep eye!
Joey: Let it go, Ross.
ROSS: Yeah.
[Scene: Outside Monas Apartment, Ross is knocking on the door.]
Rachel: Yeah. So don't move, okay? Just stay here and... (nods towards Ross) maybe close your blinds at night.
ROSS: You were in a porno?
RACHEL: Is Ross here?
Ross: Wow, I havent seen her for like forever. I wonder if she still carries that Barbie everywhere she goes.
ROSS: Hey, save us some pizza. [they go off to Rachel's room]
Ross: Im sorry about your date.
ROSS: You got a tattoo?
ROSS: Wha, OK, I'm sorry, let's uh, why don't we find someplace else.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are at the counter as Ross enters.]
ROSS: Ok fine.
ROSS: Get out.
ROSS: We're not done.
Monica: Anyway, Ross and I were always captains, and um, it got kindve competitive and one year, Geller Bowl VI, I accidentally broke Rosss nose.
[Susan approaches Ross, who's looking lonely]
Ross: Im so proud of you.
Ross: (patting his clothes like he is looking for his wallet) No, no hes not.