words in movies
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Ross is playing with Emma on the couch after just changing her diaper.]
Ross: And that's why, no matter what mommy says, we really were on a break. (baby talk) Yes we were! Yes we were! (picks Emma up) Come here gorgeous. (puts her on his knees and talks to her) Oh! Look at you! You are the cutest little baby ever! You're just a... a little bitty baby, you know that? But you've got... (in a softer voice) You've got big beautiful eyes... Yes you do... and a... and a big round belly. (emphasises the B's) Big baby butt! I like big butts. (raps) I like big butts and I cannot lie / you other brothers can't deny / when a girl walks in with an itty, bitty, waist / and a round thing in your face you get...(Emma laughs) Oh my God, Emma... you're laughing! Oh my God, you've never done that before, have you? You never done that before... Daddy made you laugh, huh? Well, daddy and Sir Mix Alot... What? What? You... you wanna hear some more? Uhm...(raps) My anaconda don't want none / unless you got buns hon... (Emma laughs again and Ross looks worried) I'm a terrible father!
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Rachel enters the apartment.]
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Guess what? I made Emma laugh today.
Ross: Yeah, and it was uhm... it was like a real little person laugh too. It was... it was like uhm... (Ross tries to impersonate Emma's laugh, but it comes out very squeaky, very high pitched. He laughs about himself but then looks at Rachel, realises that it sounded weird and straightens his face.) Only... only not creepy.
Ross: I uhm... Well, I sang... (Rachel gasps) well actually I rapped... Baby Got Back... (Rachel's face changes from excited to angry)
Ross: But you know what, if you think about it, it actually promotes a healthy uhm... body image... because... even big butts or uhm... juicy doubles.
Ross: Please don't take her away from me!
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Emma is sitting in her chair on the apothecary table and Rachel is trying to make her laugh.]
Rachel: Okay... aahhh... Please laugh for mommy... Please? Please laugh for mommy... (Rachel makes a funny face, sticking her tongue out, making a farting noise and using her hands as antlers, wiggling her fingers... No response from Emma...) Not funny huh? Oh so, is it... only offensive novelty rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? 'Cause mommy can rap... (Rachel tries to rap and makes weird movements with her arms in the process.) My name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are... Oh, I can't rap... Allright sweetheart... This is only because I love you so much, and I know that you're not gonna tell anybody... (Rachel's face is telling "Oh what am I doing? The things I have to go through... and she starts to rap) I like... big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... / when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face... (Emma starts to laugh) Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh! Oh! (Rachel now really gets into it, and her insecure movements start getting better) I like big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... Oh Emma you're laughing! Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little weirdo... (Rachel picks up Emma and Ross now enters)
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Oh I know, isn't it? Ooh... what'd you do to get her to laugh?
Ross: You sang Baby Got Back didn't you?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's. Emma is in her bed and Ross and Rachel are rapping and dancing for her.]
Ross: She sweat, wet. got it going like a turbo 'vette.
Ross: Yeah!
Ross: Yeah!
Ross: Hell yeah!
Ross: Shake it!
Ross: Shake it!
Ross: Baby got back (Then Ross turns around and sees their friends standing in the doorway)
Ross: Rachel please! That is so inappropriate!
Ross: (loudly) Good luck!
(Ross reveals a bag of apples.)
Ross: Oh yeah, about telling Mom and Dad, I was thinking about maybe writing a letter.
ROSS: This is so cool. You're actually gonna be on television.
Ross: Whats up? (He smiles. His teeth are freakishly white.)
ROSS: Well then that's it. And if George and Adelaide can't accept that, then the hell with them. Look, if my parents didn't want me to marry you, no way that would have stopped me. Look, this is your wedding. Do it.
ROSS: And you had no idea they weren't getting along?
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are giving Phoebe and Rachel the brides maid test.]
Ross: (to Monica): Could you take it to Carol's every now and then, and show it to Ben, just so he doesn't forget me?
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Well umm, yknow, I used to play.
Ross: Okay, guys.
Ross: Really?! I mean, really?!!
Ross: Pshhshhh!
Ross: Monicas right. Were talking about getting married here. Okay? She-she cant just rush into this.
Ross: All right, gentlemen, youre up first.
Rachel: Wh, Ross what do you want from me? You want me, you want me to quit my job so you can feel like you have a girlfriend?
Phoebe: (taking Ross aside) Have umm, have you thought anymore about you and Rachel?
Ross: Nothing. But the complaint department at the condom company got an earful. And then when I turned around she was gone.
Ross: Hey. Rachel, I-I-I've been wanting to tell you something for a while now and I really, I just have to get it out.
ROSS: G-gift? The thing's not the gift?
Monica: Phoebe, Ross sucks!
Monica and Ross: Scuse us
[Ross comes out of Rachel's bedroom in her bathrobe and heads for the bathroom. On his way back, Richard comes out of Monica's bedroom in her bathrobe.]
Ross: (entering carrying a garment bag) Hey!
Ross: It came in the mail today, it's uh, 72 long-stemmed red roses, one for each day that I've known and loved Emily, cut up into mulch!
Ross: Yeah, that's kinda what I meant by "bye!"
Ross: Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. (He gets up leaving Phoebe in shock.)
Ross: (to Phoebe) Hey!
Phoebe: Hello. Oh good. Ross could you put up some of these flyers for me? (He smiles at her.) OH!! Demon!! Demon!!
Ross: Pheebs
Rachel: Well then he gets a divorce, its Ross!
Ross: What?
Ross: Yeah, okay.
Ross: Oh, hi Chloe.
Ross: And then, like three days in a row he got to the newspaper before I did, and peed all over the crossword.
Joey: All right look, Ross, hes right. Emilys great, shes great! But this way too soon, youre only gonna scare her!
Ross: No Chandler, everything! Like stuff you like, stuff she likes, technique, stamina, girth....
Ross: Thanks, Dad, really, I ju... you know, I just, I just needed to know, um... when did you start to feel like a father?
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Ross: (To Phoebe and Mike) I can't believe you guys aren't going to be able to get married today.
(Chandler and Ross both laugh)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe, Rachel, Ross, and Ryan are there. Ryan is in uniform, getting ready to leave.]
Ross: Veto. Stewart?
Ross: Ah, well all go. (motions to Chandler) Come on. (the guys leave)
Ross: Two seconds
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are arguing.]
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: What are you doing?
Ross: Everything? Even the TV?
Janice: (entering) Ross you left you scarf in (sees everyone.) Hey you guys. (Does the laugh.)
Ross: Oh, who? Me?
(Ross is at a loss for words.)
Ross: 11, unbelievable 11 is correct. (The guys celebrate.) All right, thats 4 for the guys. Ladies, youre up.
Ross: Hey. Oh, Im sorry, this is Cailin.
[Scene: The Ultimate Fighting Championship, Ross and Monica are there watching Pete.]
Ross: No, its okay. Some-some kid asked me to pick it up for him, but I dont
Ross: But having a dove place the ring on your finger wouldve been no problem?
Ross: Chandler, I want you to run a post pattern to the left, okay. And sweetie..
ROSS: Yes, yes I am. Are you a, uh, a friend of Rachel's?
ROSS: (putting his arm up with his hand on the door frame.)� Why?� (He starts to lower his arm.)
Ross: Yeah, uh... and then I figured after you win, we could all go out to the balcony and see a night rainbow with gremlins dancing on top of it!
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: I know, me too. It was... You know, it was like one of those things you think is never gonna happen, and then it does, and it's everything you want it to be.
Ross: I just wanna check something.
Ross: Come on. You gotta help me figure out what to do. Okay?
Ross: What did you get?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross has just broken up with Julie and is about to get with Rachel.]
Ross: Hey.
Chandler: (to Ross) All right listen, I have to go to the bathroom, but if the place with the big fish comes up again. Id like know whether thats several big fish or just one big fish.
Ross: Oh no. Dont, dont, dont start packing. Come on! (She puts some clothes into her bag, and Ross throws them out.)
Joey: I-I think everybodys pretending they dont hear you. Anyway, look, I dont know about you and your jackets and your separate tables, but Ross is one of my best friends, and if I save him a seat, Im telling you, he will sit in it! (Ross enters and goes over to the white table) Ross! Ross! Over here, man! I-I saved you seat.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch. Ross is sitting on the armchair.]
(Ross flips the coin again.)
Joey: Oh, little party favours, check it out! (Its a shirt that reads, "Ross Geller, Bachelor Bash 1998")
Ross: No! Nonono, wait a sec. I may have something in the back.
Ross: Im telling you its totally unconstituional.
Ross: Guess whose middle name is Muriel.
Ross: Oh, mine's December...
Ross: No, 19.
Ross: 30 seconds on the clock. 5 questions wins the game. The lightning round begins now! What is Joeys favorite food?
[She closes the door in his face. Ross walks sullenly back to the couch and sits down. A moment of silence ensues.]
Ross: Correct. Rachel claims this is her favorite movie
Ross: Correct, his profession was?
Chandler and Ross: Woooo!!!
ROSS: Joey, what did you think a nubbin was?
Ross: Dude, we are sooo gonna party!
Ross: No, it's not a divorce, it is not a divorce! Anyway, I think Rachel and I need to, you know, get on with our lives, maybe, maybe start seeing other people.
Phoebe: Uh-huh! Ross invited us all to watch.
Ross: What happened?
Chandler and Ross: Whoa-whoa-whoa!
Ross: I mean look, that-that one night we had was fun and and certainly passionate, but dont you think its better if we just stayed friends?
Ross: OK, fine, well I'm not gonna watch, alright.
Ross: Joey, had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was?
Ross: So, do you get colours or just French tips?
[Scene: Central Perk close to closing. Ross and Julie are still there. Rachel is cleaning tables.]
Ross: If like the four of us could all yknow, hang out together. Uh, in fact Emilys coming into town this weekend, why dont you say we all have dinner? Say, Sunday night?
ROSS: Good, good, good. So, is uh, was your moustache, did, used to be different?
Ross: It's morphin time!
RACH: Oh, well, that's, that's mighty big of you, Ross. [to the others] I said don't go!