words in movies
[Scene: Rachels Room, Joey moves Rosss coat to get the tissues Rachel wants and the engagement ring box Mrs. Geller gave him falls out of the pocket it was inside. Joey goes to one knee, picks up the box, opens it, and sees that its an engagement ring.]
[Cut to Ross getting of an elevator carrying a bouquet of flowers and walking down the hall to Rachels room.]
[Cut back into Rachels room.]
Joey: Uh Look Rach (Ross enters.) Hey Ross is here! Hey look! Its my good friend Ross. Hey Ross.
Monica: (entering with everyone else including Mr. Geller) Hi! Hey look whos here!
Mr. Geller: Wheres my granddaughter? Ive been practicing my magic tricks.
Ross: Hey, wheres uh, wheres mom?
Monica: Oh, Aunt Liddys coming? That means we get five dollars each!
Ross: Uh Dad, Emmas in the nursery. Ill take you now. If you want, but (To Rachel) I really want to talk to you.
Phoebe: Yay! Its so exciting! Wow, you couldve done that with us there.
Joey: It wasnt my ring! It fell out of Rosss jacket! And when I knelt down to pick it up Rachel thought I was proposing!
Joey: I know! I know its awful.
Joey: (laughs) Now lets not get carried away. (He walks away as Monica comes over and hugs Chandler from behind.)
Monica: Come on! Come on, if we have sex again itll double our chances of getting pregnant. Do you think that closets still available?
Ross: (noticing something) Actually umm (He turns Mr. Gellers head to look at Emma.)
[Scene: Rachels Room, Phoebe is entering.]
Joey: (entering) Oh uh, hey Pheebs. Uh yknow what? Ill-Ill come back later. (He goes to leave but runs into Ross whos entering.)
[Scene: A hallway, Joey and Ross find Mr. Geller with his ear up against a janitors closet door.]
[Scene: Rachels Room, she is taking the ring out of Rosss jacket, looks at it, and puts it on her finger as Joey enters.]
Rachel: Of course! Oh Joey, this ring I its beautiful I love it!
Joey: Yeah uh look Rach, theres something I gotta tell ya.
(Theres a knock on the door and a nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Nurse: Its all right honey, it takes some babies a while to get it, but dont worry. Itll happen.
Rachel: Oh look, shes pulling away again! Do you think my nipples are too big for her mouth? (Joey gets embarrassed.) She looks scared. Doesnt she look scared?
Rachel: Its just so frustrating! Why doesnt she want my breast?!
Joey: I dont know! Maybe shes crazy! (Storms out.)
Ross: What, that we had a baby? Come on lets give him a little credit, although, he did eat a piece of plastic fruit earlier.
Phoebe: Oh, its a secret. Oh goodie! Yes! We havent done the secret thing in a long time.
Phoebe: All right, me too. (They go into her room and see that shes sleeping.) Should we wake her up?
Ross: No! No, come on let her sleep! Shes so exhausted.
Ross: Its mine.
[Scene: The Janitors Closet, Chandler and Monica are trying to figure out what to do now.]
Chandler: This is okay. Were all adults here; theres nothing to be ashamed of. Now, lets put our underwear in our pockets and walk out the door. (They do so and find Mr. Geller leaning against a wall stunned.)
Monica: Well, thats okay dad, we-we can wait until later.
Mr. Geller: Well you gotta get at it princess! When your mother and I were trying to conceive you, whenever she was ovulating, bam, we did it. Thats how I got my bad hip.
Chandler: Thats funny, this conversations how I got the bullet hole in my head.
[Scene: Rachels Room, Monica is entering.]
Monica: Well, nows a good time. Im on my way to have my ears cut off.
Monica: Is he crazy?! You just had Rosss baby!
Monica: What?! Are you crazy? You just had Rosss baby! Its-its so inappropriate. No, its worse than that. Its wrong. Its It is bigger than mine! (Rachels engagement ring.)
Rachel: Why not? I dont want to do this alone! And hes such a sweet guy and he loves me so much.
Chandler: Joey, you have to tell her whats going on! And what did it look like?!
Joey: I didnt look at it. Stupid babys head was blocking most of it.
Joey: Look, its not that easy. She said she wanted to marry me. I dont want to hurt her.
[Scene: Rachels Room, Ross is entering.]
Joey: It wasnt my ring! Its Rosss ring! Thats why I felt so bad Rach, because he was going to propose.
Joey: Oh thats right. Theres a lot going on here and I think I ate some bad fruit earlier.
(Theres a knock on the door and the Nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Nurse: Hey, she just woke up! Shes hungry. Why dont we give this another try?
Rachel: Shes doing it Look, shes breast-feeding look!
Joey: (looking at the ceiling) Ah, its beautiful.
Joey: No, Rach, I shouldve told you sooner. Its just that Man! That kid is going to town! (Joey makes his awkward exit.)
Rachel: Shes perfect.
Ross: Look, I-I know its not a proposal and I dont know where you are, but with everything thats been going on and with Emma and Ive been feeling
Rachel: Wh-whats that?
[Scene: Outside the Janitors Closet, there are people having sex and Mr. Geller is trying to give them some pamphlets.]
Joey: Hes fine!
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Tim: Whats
Chandler: Okay, heres the situation. The keys to the cuffs are on the back of the door. Could you be a doll and grab them and scoot on over and unlock me? And on a totally different subject, that is a lovely pantsuit.
Monica: Umm, well, hes
[Scene: Chandlers bedroom, hes listening to the hypnosis tape again.]
Rachel: (reading a card) Okay, your band is playing at Arnolds, collect three cool points. Which means, I have five, and that means I get Joeys boxers!
(Theres a loud knocking.)
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
Joey: Oh, little party favours, check it out! (Its a shirt that reads, "Ross Geller, Bachelor Bash 1998")
Monica: All right, thats it, were going to the emergency room.
Rachel: Oooohh thats interesting.
Kathy: (sees its Joey) Oh.
Joey: So, were walking down the street and I turn to you and I say, Hey, lets go hang out at Totally Nude Nudes, remember? And then, and then, you turn to me and say, Nah, lets just hang out at your place. Well, that was a nice move dumb ass.
(After hes gone.)
Ross: Its a legitimate learning technique. (Looking around and seeing the woman behind him glaring at him.) Wow!
Pete: Okay, thats great, but can we make it smaller? Can we make it fit on the head of a pin? I love when we make things fit on the head of a pin.
Monica: (entering with Rachel) Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are so amazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
Chandler: Oh, so thats this is gonna work now? Youre just gonna order me around all the time?
Chandler: Well, its, its yummy. So Mary-Angela do you like it?
Rachel: Oh! I do not remember him! Wow! He's really got that sexy, smoldering thing going on. (We see Will angrily staring at Rachel.) Oh my God, hes Look at the way hes just staring at me. I think hes trying to mouth something to me, but I cant make it out. (Will mouths, "I hate you.")
Joeys Grandmother: Of course! Its her favorite.
Rachel: Ohh! Thats great!
Housekeeper: Miss Waltham, is at the rehearsal dinner and its not polite to make fun of people. Goodbye.
Monica: I dont know exactly. Its-its sorta like wrestling.
Ross: You think?! God, I, ah, Im in hell. I mean what, what am I gonna do? Rachels all like, I love you and, and lets work on this. And all I can think about is, What is she gonna do? What is she gonna say? when I tell her what I did.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, thats right, the keyboards, huh?
(Nina beams flirtatiously at Chandler, who catches her drift, but for once hes lost for something to say – so she nods her head to tell him that hes thinking correctly...)
Rachel: Theres nobody here!
Monica: No honey, Im sorry, but the weekends not over yet.
Sophie: Shes not making me uncomfortable.
Joey: Oh, see thats where youre wrong. Whatever it is I can do it. And if didnt see it up there, just-just try me.
Ross: Theres other stuff too.
Ross: Its not like we dont know how to party!!
Joey: Yeah! All right? Lets go!
Mr. Bowmont: What the hell, its for a good cause! All right!
[Scene: Rachels Doctors Office, she is waiting for her doctor as a nurse enters.]
Monica: Thats not even a word! I can get this! I can get this!
Joey: No! Its not okay! Its not okay at all!! Youre dead inside!!
Ross: (looking in the window behind them) Yknow, yknow Im lookin and I dont think anyones home here. I say we just break the window, crawl through, and-and yknow explain later.
Ross: Yeeeeeep Yep-yep-yep-yep-yep. I remember when she took out on her dads boat she wouldnt let me help at all.
[Scene: Central Perk, its the same scene from the end of last weeks show. Phoebe and Rachel are sitting on the couch as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Ohh! Thats so sweet of you! Oh yum! (Takes a bite out of the sandwich and starts to get sick.) Did you put pickles on this?
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, she is frantically working and is handing two finished dishes to a waitress.]
Monica: No! Thats where we keep the canned goods! Have you completely forgotten everything you learned at orientation?
[cut to later, in Rosss huddle.]
[Scene: Joeys Premiere, the movie is ending and it takes the applause to wake up Chandler.]
Phoebe: Umm, that papers two weeks old.
Joey: I call Monicas room!
Phoebe: Whats wrong Mon?
Chandler: All right ladies, heres what were gonna do. (Points to a stripper.) You are gonna take off my clothes. (To another two strippers) You two, go get the oils. (To another stripper) And you just constantly scream at the top of your voice, "Chandlers the king! Chandlers the king!"
Chandler: Well, I dont really know what that is, but lets!!
Monica: All right then, then nothing changes! Everything is great! Everything stays the same! And you go unpack because its been three days and its driving me insane!
Phoebe: Okay, whatever. Yknow what? I dont have time have time to convince you because hes only here for four hours, and Im gonna go see him! (Gets up and leaves.)
Joey: I know! My grandmothers gonna see this!
Phoebe: Oh-ooh, and I brought Operation, but umm I lost the umm (It starts buzzing) Its making a noise.
Rachel: Thats easy for you to say, you werent almost just killed.
Frank: Its so cool man, its so, its just cause being with her is so much better than like not being with her.
Phoebe: Oh I do! (She grabs her huge purse and starts rummaging through it and taking out various items in a futile search for the gum.) Oh, yknow what? No. (Pause) Wait a second. (She removes a bag filled with water that has a goldfish swimming in it.) I know its in here somewhere.
Chandler: Oh, thats mature.
Joey: Its between us and the sea, Ross!
Monica: Phoebe! Come on! Lets go! (Knocks on her door.) Come on! (Phoebe enters with guitar and not ready to go.) Why arent you dressed yet?!
Ross: Oh, somebodys feeling better.
Rachel: (calling from the bathroom) All right, whos turn is it to help me get up!
Phoebe: Theres sooo much you dont know.
[Cut to Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are there. I think its The One With The Joke.]
Rachel: No. Ross, it, it just seems that y'know its time we-we y'know, move on. I mean, I mean dont you think?
[Scene: Allesandros, Joey is eating some cheese.]
Joey: All right, relax. Its just a shoe.
The Waiter: Well thats not true.
Mrs. Geller: Whats this? Blue nail polish?
Monica: Thats not funny.
[Cut to his bedroom, Ross is listening at the door as Paul opens the door, trapping Ross behind it. With Pauls back turned Ross coils up like a snake and slitters underneath the bed.]
Rachel: All right, fine, but dont get mad at me. Its-its just a little hard to believe.
[Chandler proceeds to point out Joeys errors in this forth set of flashbacks. The first flashback is from The One With The Cat. Chandler has just returned home to see that their apartment has been cleaned out and finds Joey trapped in the entertainment center.]
Phoebe: I know but its so hard! Nothing rhymes with your stupid name!
Ross: You have 30 seconds. And the lightning round beginsstop it (Chandler stops jumping)now. What was Monicas nickname when she was a field hockey goalie?
Phoebe: I just-I just started walking around not knowing what to do next, yknow? I-I started asking people on the street if they wanted massages. Then these policemen, thought I was a whore too. Its been a really bad day, whore wise.
Monica: Heres Frannie. Hmm, wont she be happy to see me? (Starts to get up and great Frannie.)
Mark: Yep. Yep, thats what I didnt want to know.
Chandler, Monica, and Rachel: Great!! Thats great!
Phoebe: Yeah, whats your point?
Ross: I mean, theres no point in spending time with someone if-if its just fun. Its gotta be, its gotta be going somewhere right? So where-where is it going? (Pause) Ah! Thats-thats the real question. And-and the answer is is its going somewhere fun. Now I-I know what youre thinking, fun was fine for you like ten years ago yknow, but youre-youre not getting any younger. No I meanNo not you, not you, youyou are getting younger. I meanyou-you look like youre getting younger by the secondWhats your secret?
Joey: Yknow what? I think thats enough for today. Thanks for your help! (He grabs their scripts and heads for his room.)
Phoebe: What am I supposed to do? Ask every guy I make out with if hes married? (Rachel looks at her.) No, yeah, I should.
Phoebe: (On the phone, in New York) Uh, hello, this is Ross Gellers personal physician, Dr. Philange.
Mr. Douglas: Thats unbelievable.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Chandler, and Monica are there. Rachel is reading everyones horoscope.]
Chandler: I think its great that you work here. Youre going to make a lot of money, and heres your first tip: Dont eat yellow snow. (He laughs, then picks up a pen, glares at Ross, and writes in his journal). Ah ha ha, 2:15, coffeehouse.
Joey: Thats crazy.
Ross: Thats okay, Im cool over here. Ill catch up with you later, Joey. (Joey is shocked.)
[Theres a knock on the door.]
Joey: Theres a lost and found? (Gunther sets the box up on the table.) My shoe! (Grabs it out of the box.)
Chandler: Cause its-its not his last name.
Chandler: (Points to one) Thats one?
Phoebe: Its a Ms. Pac-Man machine!!
Chandler: That-thats bad?
[Scene: The Gellers Kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are still cooking.]
Chandler: Because thats the only part of you he can see when hes on the table!
[Scene: Dots Spot, Chip and Monica are on there date, eating dinner. Chip is telling a story.]