words in movies
[Scene: Rachels Room, Joey moves Rosss coat to get the tissues Rachel wants and the engagement ring box Mrs. Geller gave him falls out of the pocket it was inside. Joey goes to one knee, picks up the box, opens it, and sees that its an engagement ring.]
[Cut to Ross getting of an elevator carrying a bouquet of flowers and walking down the hall to Rachels room.]
[Cut back into Rachels room.]
Joey: Uh Look Rach (Ross enters.) Hey Ross is here! Hey look! Its my good friend Ross. Hey Ross.
Monica: (entering with everyone else including Mr. Geller) Hi! Hey look whos here!
Mr. Geller: Wheres my granddaughter? Ive been practicing my magic tricks.
Ross: Hey, wheres uh, wheres mom?
Monica: Oh, Aunt Liddys coming? That means we get five dollars each!
Ross: Uh Dad, Emmas in the nursery. Ill take you now. If you want, but (To Rachel) I really want to talk to you.
Phoebe: Yay! Its so exciting! Wow, you couldve done that with us there.
Joey: It wasnt my ring! It fell out of Rosss jacket! And when I knelt down to pick it up Rachel thought I was proposing!
Joey: I know! I know its awful.
Joey: (laughs) Now lets not get carried away. (He walks away as Monica comes over and hugs Chandler from behind.)
Monica: Come on! Come on, if we have sex again itll double our chances of getting pregnant. Do you think that closets still available?
Ross: (noticing something) Actually umm (He turns Mr. Gellers head to look at Emma.)
[Scene: Rachels Room, Phoebe is entering.]
Joey: (entering) Oh uh, hey Pheebs. Uh yknow what? Ill-Ill come back later. (He goes to leave but runs into Ross whos entering.)
[Scene: A hallway, Joey and Ross find Mr. Geller with his ear up against a janitors closet door.]
[Scene: Rachels Room, she is taking the ring out of Rosss jacket, looks at it, and puts it on her finger as Joey enters.]
Rachel: Of course! Oh Joey, this ring I its beautiful I love it!
Joey: Yeah uh look Rach, theres something I gotta tell ya.
(Theres a knock on the door and a nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Nurse: Its all right honey, it takes some babies a while to get it, but dont worry. Itll happen.
Rachel: Oh look, shes pulling away again! Do you think my nipples are too big for her mouth? (Joey gets embarrassed.) She looks scared. Doesnt she look scared?
Rachel: Its just so frustrating! Why doesnt she want my breast?!
Joey: I dont know! Maybe shes crazy! (Storms out.)
Ross: What, that we had a baby? Come on lets give him a little credit, although, he did eat a piece of plastic fruit earlier.
Phoebe: Oh, its a secret. Oh goodie! Yes! We havent done the secret thing in a long time.
Phoebe: All right, me too. (They go into her room and see that shes sleeping.) Should we wake her up?
Ross: No! No, come on let her sleep! Shes so exhausted.
Ross: Its mine.
[Scene: The Janitors Closet, Chandler and Monica are trying to figure out what to do now.]
Chandler: This is okay. Were all adults here; theres nothing to be ashamed of. Now, lets put our underwear in our pockets and walk out the door. (They do so and find Mr. Geller leaning against a wall stunned.)
Monica: Well, thats okay dad, we-we can wait until later.
Mr. Geller: Well you gotta get at it princess! When your mother and I were trying to conceive you, whenever she was ovulating, bam, we did it. Thats how I got my bad hip.
Chandler: Thats funny, this conversations how I got the bullet hole in my head.
[Scene: Rachels Room, Monica is entering.]
Monica: Well, nows a good time. Im on my way to have my ears cut off.
Monica: Is he crazy?! You just had Rosss baby!
Monica: What?! Are you crazy? You just had Rosss baby! Its-its so inappropriate. No, its worse than that. Its wrong. Its It is bigger than mine! (Rachels engagement ring.)
Rachel: Why not? I dont want to do this alone! And hes such a sweet guy and he loves me so much.
Chandler: Joey, you have to tell her whats going on! And what did it look like?!
Joey: I didnt look at it. Stupid babys head was blocking most of it.
Joey: Look, its not that easy. She said she wanted to marry me. I dont want to hurt her.
[Scene: Rachels Room, Ross is entering.]
Joey: It wasnt my ring! Its Rosss ring! Thats why I felt so bad Rach, because he was going to propose.
Joey: Oh thats right. Theres a lot going on here and I think I ate some bad fruit earlier.
(Theres a knock on the door and the Nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Nurse: Hey, she just woke up! Shes hungry. Why dont we give this another try?
Rachel: Shes doing it Look, shes breast-feeding look!
Joey: (looking at the ceiling) Ah, its beautiful.
Joey: No, Rach, I shouldve told you sooner. Its just that Man! That kid is going to town! (Joey makes his awkward exit.)
Rachel: Shes perfect.
Ross: Look, I-I know its not a proposal and I dont know where you are, but with everything thats been going on and with Emma and Ive been feeling
Rachel: Wh-whats that?
[Scene: Outside the Janitors Closet, there are people having sex and Mr. Geller is trying to give them some pamphlets.]
Rachel: Yes, I know that. I know that. And I know that hiring him was probably not the smartest thing that Ive ever done. But Im telling you, from this moment on I swear this is strictly professional. (Theres a knock on the door.) Yes?
Phoebe: (clinking two glasses together) Speech! Speech! Lets hear from the birthday girl! Huh?
Phoebe: Well, at least you didnt rent yours from a store called, "Its Not Too Late."
Chandler: (worried) Hes the headliner of a gay burlesque show.
Joey: (pointing to the TV) Okay, Ross, look-look-look-look, look right here. Thats called a scrum, okay? Its kinda like a huddle.
[Sequence 1: Monica throws the ball over Chandlers head to Joey who catches it for a touchdown, and starts to dance in celebration. Chandler then tackles him, and he starts to dance in celebration.]
Amanda: Hello Monica. It’s Amanda calling again. I am in the neighborhood hoping I can pop by your flat!
Rachel: Huh. Except, Phoebes not gonna be the one that gets to dress them.
Rachel: Good! Cause Ive got a product report to read, its like eight pages, I hope I dont fall asleep.
Phoebe: Well, maybe its so big because the house was built on radioactive waste.
Ross: What? Oh yeah. (He moves next to her head.) Im sorry. I mean I-I think I went a little crazy. I mean I was thinking about myself when I (Wanders towards Rachels feet) reallyI should have been thinking about you Rach
Joey: Wow! Thats pretty nice. I thought he cut off his ear cause he sucked. What else you got in there?
Chandler: Im right! Right? There was like no chemistry between them. Before they had heat, and now theres no heat! Now you know what this means, Joey told us what this means!
Monica: Well, I mean what about friends of your grandmothers? Wouldnt they have the recipe?
Rachel: Why hasnt he called Rachel? Why? Why? I dont understand. Why? He said hell call. Why? Why? Chandler Im telling you she has flipped out, shes gone crazy!
Chandler: Oh thats right. Its your first day! So are you psyched to fight fake crime with your robot sidekick?
Rachel: Well, maybe thats, maybe thats really brave.
(Kathy enters (Because shes listed in the credits).)
Joey: Yeah, you can get a Volvo. If thats what you really want.
Monica: No! All hes thinking about is how youre taking this! I mean, listen its totally freaking him out. Hes talking about moving to Vermont.
Phoebe: Oh, okay, its the slide instead of stairs. Watch this. (She slides a doll down the slide)
(Shes interrupted by a loud crash and the sound of braking dishes. Followed quickly by another crash. Everyone turns and looks at the back room, as Gunther emerges.)
Joey: No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anything its gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach! (Rolls over and shows Chandler.)
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) (To All) Its the deli again!
Rachel: Oh, okay. Is that what you want to do? You wanna go over and give a little shout out to the old, hot chickas? Okay, lets do that Sailor Joe. Quick question though, (grabs some of the rigging) whats this called?
Ross: Hi, um, Im err, (has to clear his throat) Im Ross Geller, and err ah... (pats Carols bulge) ..thats, thats my boy in there, and uh, (points) this is Carol Willick, and this... is Susan Bunch. Susan is um Carols, just, com... (embarrassment finally overwhelms the poor fellow, who becomes incoherent until) ..whos next?
Monica: Well Thats not the only time this was an issue. You remember when umm, you spent Thanksgiving with us? You called me fat.
Rachel: (sees Chips phone number) Wow! Look at that, Chip Matthews called. I wonder what he wants?
Ross: Its a clown kit! Clown kit!
[Scene: Dr. Longs Office, Ross and Rachel are waiting for the doctor. Ross is drumming his fingers on the bed.]
Monica: Thats Will from high school!
(Joey is now looking at Rachel, and since Rachels standing and hes sitting down and hes not looking at her face You get the picture.)
Ben: Whens my daddy coming back?
Monica: Passport, check! (As she puts away each item, she says check.) Camera, check! Travellers cheques, check!
Vince: No-no its okay. Its just that ah, I thought we had something pretty special here. And y'know I-I felt like you were someone I could finally open up to, and (starts choking up) That theres so much in me I have to share with you yet.
Chandler: (entering, with Joey) All right! Lets do it!
[Scene: Petes office, he is participating in a conference call with three other employees, each of whom are on a different TV screen that he controls with a remote.]
Ross: Hi! Im so glad youre here, but its gonna be a while. I-I wished youd called first.
[Scene: Ross and Chandlers bank, they are there to close their accounts.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachels baby shower is underway. Monica and Phoebe are working in the kitchen.]
[Scene: Monica and Phoebes, three years earlier, Phoebe, Monica, and Ross are there]
Monica: Hes with Emily at a Bed and Breakfast in Vermont!
Joey: No, an entertainment unit, with a mail cubby built right in. Its a one day job, max.
Joey: Hey-hey come on you guys, give him a break. Ross, seriously, hows it going with her?
(They all try and shake hands at once. They end up criss-crossing theyre arms to shake each others hand, and Ross says )
Phoebe: Yeah, no, Ralph doesnt look anything like that guy. Hes-hes young and hes got long hair and a beard and a hacky sack.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are on the couch as Phoebe enters with Monicas soul mate.]
Joey: See? Thats a great smile! Easy. Natural. Now, pretend I have a camera. (Chandler immediately does The Face.) Youre changing it!
Phoebe: Ursula! (Ursula turns, smiles, and continues walking.) Wait! Err-err, its me! Phoebe!
[Scene, Monica and Chandlers, Chandler is there. Everything is out of its place and Chandler's cleaning.]
Joey: Pheebs! Wait up! (She stops.) Listen uh, close your eyes. (She does so and Joey passionately kisses her.) Maybe thats one thing you can cross off your list.
Monica: Okay, forget the specials for a minute. Umm, all right heres the thing, for the last two weeks I have umm, (quietly) tried really hard to create a positive atmosphere
Chandler: Well, its because I trust you, youre one of my best friends, and you walked in on me when I was looking at ring brochures.
Rachel: No! Put that box down! We are not going anywhere! This is my apartment and I like it! This is a girls apartment! That is a boys apartment, its dirty and it smells. This is pretty. Its-its so pretty! And look, and its-its purple! And Im telling you, you with the steady hand, I am not moving, and now I have got the steady hand. (She holds out her hand, which is shaking uncontrollably.)
Joey: No! Never! Never! (Pause, then Joey wants to shake Rosss hand.) Bye.
Russell: (Rosss divorce lawyer.) Hello, is Ross there?
Monica: (looking out the peephole) Ohh, shes looking down the hall. Oh! She looked right at me! Oh wait, you cant see people through that little hole, can you? (Goes back to the door.) Hello!
[Scene: The Hallway between the Apartments, Ross is hiding behind that bump out on Monicas side waiting for Phoebe and Rachel. As they come up the stairs, he jumps out and yells ]
(Rachel gets up and ushers them into the hall, as they pass Joshua, he leaps onto the counter to avoid them. Rachel drops them off in the hall, and knocks on Joeys door.)
Joey: Damnit woman were losing precious time! Now do you want this mans blood on your head?
Chandler: Its all very, very good. (She covers up and sits down.) So you wanna go uh, mix it up?
Joey: They go on one date and youre worried about them getting married?! Hes not you!
Monica: Wait. Rachel, no, hes married. Married! If you dont realize that, I cant help you.
Joey: Thats okay Ross maybe you need a new picture. Okay? Its not gonna be what you thought, but no matter what theres gonna be a brand new little baby, your baby. Who cares what the picture looks like?
Ross: And what(notices the stenographer is still typing)What are you typing that for? Did you hear what she said? We dont get the annulment. Dont type that! What?! Stop typing! (He goes over to where the stenographer is typing and in the process pushes Rachel out of his way.) Hey! Stop typing! (Hes still typing.) Stop typing! Stop typing!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is watching Baywatch with the baby chick. Hes on one leather chair, the chick is on the other. Its watching Yasmine Bleeth run and is chirping.]
Ross: Yeah, they print jokes, interviews, hard-hitting journalism. Its not just about the pictures.
Joey: My whole familys from Naples!
[Scene: The moment we waited for has finally arrived. Its time for Monica and Chandlers wedding. Weve got violins playing Every Breath You Take, weve got guests seated, and Chandler starts walking down the aisle with his parents on either arm.]
Phoebe: (Smiling blankly) Right, and its me.
Ross: once you know the stories, its not that bad. First marriage, wifes hidden sexuality, not my fault. Second marriage, said the wrong name at the altar, a little my fault. Third marriage, well they really shouldnt allow you to get married when youre that drunk and have writing all over your face, Nevadas fault.
Conan: Its a tradition here on Friends after every taping for me to hang out with you guys, (They all laugh) talk down the episode umm The point of this whole thing is what people see in America is: they see Friends, they love the show, it looks like a smooth running machine, but behind the scenes theres deceit, mistrust, and hate. And I thought, I thought wed actually take a look at uh, yknow some of these moments where you guys arethere are mistakes. You make mistakes.
[Ross tries to start the truck, and discovers the batterys dead.]
Clerk: Eight oclock is the cut-off and, (looks at his watch) aww, its 8:02.
Phoebe: Yknow, I bet it would actually make my grandmother very happy to know that were trying to figure out her recipe. I bet shes l-l-lookin up at us and smiling right now.
Ross: (to Rachel) So, hes just a nice guy. You really think this Mark doesnt want anything in exchange for helping him?
Ross: Hes right, what she did was unforgivable.
Woman On Train: Oh, no. But its just a two hour ferry ride to Nova Scotia.
Monica: All right, Ill take one box of the mint treasures, just one, and thats it. I-I started gaining weight after I joined the Brown Birds. (to Ross) Remember, how Dad bought all my boxes and I ate them all?
The A.D: Theres no way he smells, hes the only one around here with a shower in his dressing room.
Monica: (noticing the bag Joeys carrying) Oh great! Did you get a movie?
Rachel: All right, its okay. One little setback is okay, just dont let it happen again, all right? Now since daddy paid for all this stuff, I should take it all away. But Im just gonna take the-the pajmena. (Ross hands it to her.) And the uh, and the uh pants. Yknow what, Im just gonna take it all away, cause that way youll just really learn the lesson. Okay? All righty, Im gonna run a couple of errands and I will see you at dinner. (Leaves with all of Jills stuff.)
Ross: (he gets up and starts to run away from her) No! (in his escape attempt he crushes Chandlers sand castle) No!
Joey: Come on! When you go away, you-you have to play, its like a law!
Phoebe: Thats right, there you go! Crushes happen all the time! I know Ive had them for all you guys. Well, except for Ross and Chandler. And Im sure youve had them for us.
Phoebe: Yes! I will have the green salad, umm the house salad, and waters fine.
Ross: Yes lets. Yknow what? Uh, its-its not important. What is important is that, is that were having a baby. And its notDoesnt matter who came on to who.
Chandler: This is ridiculous, hes not gonna hold his breath (Ross cuts him off by taking a deep breath and holding it.)
Joey: Okay Rach, that muffin and espresso, $4.50. Ross, double latte, $2.75. Chandler, coffee and a scone, $4.25. And Pheebs, herbal tea, $1.25. So, all together thats (pauses to figure the total) $12.75.
Rachel: Ummm. Oh! Im sorry. (She grabs the box and offers him a piece.) Its a little old but
Phoebe: Im, uhh, making up flyers trying to get new massage clients. So, can I come to Bloomingdales and use the copy machine.
Gunther: (placing a cup in front of Ross) Heres your warm milk.
Rachel: When she sees that youre gone, shes gonna know that I let you out, and that I was in here, and Im gonna get fired!
Ross: Come on, who are we kidding? Im doody. Please? Shes watchin.
Joey: Oh come on man, you can dance with my partner, shes real, uh, mellow!
Rachel: But you have it right there in that file? You could tell us whether its a boy or a girl? Dayton or Sandrine? Phoebe or Phoebo?
Ross: No-no, one daddy, two mommies. All right, its all yours. (Ross pushes him off.)
Matire'd: (motioning to the empty table next to Monica and Chandlers) Or if you prefer, this table is available.
Phoebe: Oh okay, its P as in Phoebe, H as in hoebe, O as in oebe, E as in ebe, B as in bee-bee and E as in (In an Australian accent) Ello there mate!
Rachel: Yeah. So yknow, I have all of these feelings and I dont know what to do about them, because I cant date like a normal person, which is fine because I dont need a relationship, I mean all I really want is one great night. Just sex, yknow? No strings attached, no relationship, just with someone that I feel comfortable with and who knows what hes doing. For just one great night, I mean is that really so hard to find. (Looks at Joey.) So how was your day?