words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, everyone except Ross is decorating the tree.]
Rachel: Thats a good story, Grandpa.
Ross: Wow, Monicas letting other people help decorate her tree! Did someone get her drunk again or?
Monica: Having a perfectly decorated tree is not what Christmas is about. Its about being with the people that you love.
Ross: and thats the story of the dreidle. Now, some people trace the Christmas tree back to the Egyptians, who used to bring green palm branches into their huts on the shortest day of the year, symbolising lifes triumph over death. And that was like 4000 years ago.
Chandler: Hey Joe whats up?
Joey: I had to get out of the apartment. Janine is like stretching all over the place. Yknow, everywhere I look shes like (He imitates her stretching)
Chandler: I can see why thats hard to resist.
Joey: I know. And shes so sweet. I just wanna feed her grapes and brush her hair.
Chandler: You are aware that shes not a monkey, right?
Ross: I am so over Janine. I mean, yeah, at first I thought she was hot, but now shes like OLD NEWS!
Janine: I just got a call to be a dancer on a television special for New Years Eve. Its called some sort of Dickn Rockn Dickie Eve.
Monica: Hold it! Are you talking about Dick Clarks New Years Rocking Eve?
Janine: Yeah, thats what I said.
Joey: Totally! I would love to spend New Years with you.
Joey: Oh. Maybe. But hey I know how I can find out. Were going to a New Years Eve party, right? So at midnight, I can kiss her. And if she kisses me back, great! Yknow? But if she says Dude, what the hell are you doing? I can say It wasnt me, it was New Years!
Rachel: Well, thats a lot better than Ross trying to kiss me in High School, and saying that he did it because he needed chapstick.
Monica: We are going to Dick Clarks New Years Rocking Eve!
Joey: OK, listen Ive been on sets before, so let me give you a little advice, alright? Its a show, but were just dancing, OK? Its no big deal. The important thing to remember stay cool.
Ross: Oh my God its just like I dreamed it!
Director: Heres whats gonna happen. The musics gonna start, youre gonna dance, were gonna tape, you dont look at the camera. Any questions?
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, Chandler is there. Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
Chandler: What? Thats terrible!
Phoebe: No, yeah, we never find them! Shes always best at us that wily minx.
Rachel: Dont worry, were just gonna search here for an hour, them were gonna go over to Joeys and search, OK?
Chandler: No not okay, you cant look for Monicas presents!
Phoebe: Oh, thats it? (Mimics Chandler) A great idea!
Rachel: Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gotten her one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Rachel: Thats right!
Rachel: Oh, its a Macys bag!
Phoebe: Ooh, whos it for?
Rachel: (Reading) Dear losers, do you really think Id hide presents under the couch? P.S. Chandler, I knew theyd break you.
Chandler: Because thats where Joey gave me some stuff to store that Ive never seen before in my life! Okay, that did not just happen! (He does a weird clicky motion with his fingers, that kinda hard to describe.)
Janine: Thats it, feel the rhythm. Thats better.
Monica: Hey, see that snippy guy over there? Hes the one who decides who gets up on the platform. We should go dance by him.
Director: Next on the platforms are (He points to the right of Ross and Monica, so they dance over to where hes pointing to. He points away from them) you two! And (He points the other way, and Ross and Monica follow his arm. Again he points away.) You two!
[Scene: The Mens Bathroom, the tall guy is there as Joey enters.]
Tall Guy: Shes nice, huh? To think I almost brought my wife to this!
Joey: Oh come on man, you can dance with my partner, shes real, uh, mellow!
Tall Guy: No, no. Shes fair game if you ask me, sorry buddy!
Joey: Alright, alright, hey yknow fair is fair, (he pretends to wash his hands) if youre right, youre right, what can I say, but hey oh no! (He throws water on the guys pants)
Monica: Man, this sucks! Yknow if Mom and Dad dont see us on TV after we made them so jealous, I mean, whos gonna be the losers then?
Ross: We got honourable mention in the brother/sister dance category! Look, its almost fake midnight, do we really have any other choice?
Monica: Okay, lets do it. Mom and Dad are gonna be so faced!
Ross: So, do we really have to ask whos going up on the platform next?
Director: (To Cameraman) Make sure you get this, theyre gonna want it for the bloopers show. (To everyone) Alright cut! Listen up everyone, when we start again its gonna be the countdown to new years, so I wanna see everybodys excitement.
Director: Whats going on over here?
Joey: Uh, take a look at the guys pants! I mean, I know you told us to show excitement, but dont you think he went a little overboard?
Director: Whats the matter with you? Get out of here!
Joeys Head: Okay, it all comes down to this. Whatever happens, happens. Destiny.
Director: Okay, heres where we go to the live shot of Times Square, nice work everyone thats a wrap!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, Chandler and Rachel are there, and Phoebe enters with the Chick and the Duck.]
Chandler: Oh, the duck seems to think that Monica got me garbage! Hmm, I wonder what I could get Monica thats as good as garbage?
Rachel: This bench, its hollow! I cant believe I never knew that! (She pushes all the pillows off it and opens it up) Oh, the presents!!!
Rachel: Oh, this ones for me!
Phoebe: Oh, this ones for Chandler. Here.
Phoebe: And the big ones for me!
Rachel: Ooh, lets open them!
Chandler: Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Im sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?
Chandler: Thats what you got me?
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, they both enter.]
Joey: Home sweet home, huh? Nice to, uh, get back to reality. Plus we know how the New Years gonna go off. I guess theres no reason for all that Y2K panic, yknow? Anyway, gnight!
Janine: Sure, New Years Eve is only two weeks away. Can you wait?
Rachel: Cos I was gonna say theres no way you couldve done the end the way you guys did it back then!
Monica: I can do it, okay? Come on, lets go. (She and Ross get up)
Monica: I cant do it! (Ross falls into Monicas room)
Ross: Well, oh just ah, I was just wondering, when you and I split up, did you get the tape that was half the last episode of M*A*S*H and half the hostages coming home?
Chandler: Whats going on?
Rachel: Its a pretty cool tux.
Monica: Oh thats so sweet.
Phoebe: (To Monica) Oh, thats beautiful.
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachels new job, she is waiting for Joshua and practising how to ask him out.]
Monica: This is so great! And Im gonna be your babys aunt!
Hilda: No dear. Its not.
Chandler: Whats this?
Joey: So uh, whats your name?
Joey: Me too! Theres a game on Tuesday do you wanna go?
Monica: Its your suitcase. Were going to Las Vegas.
Joey: Thats weird!
The Fireman: Theres a reset button under the plastic cover.
Joey: Thats kinda hot.
Monica: Its so good, that I feel really selfish about being the only one whos eating it, that I think we should have everyone taste how good it is. Especially Ross.
Chandler: And theres daddy!
Richard: Okay, okay, one things changed. But we still want different things and we know how this is gonna end.
Phoebe: Ah-hah! At least we know its a him.
Joey: No thats not it. They let me keep my key the last time they were out of town.
Chandler: Thats Mr. Girabaldi playing the piano.
Chandler: Hes coming into the audience. Hes coming into the audience.
Phoebe: Thats great Joe!
Phoebe: I think its important that you do.
Helena: So whats your name?
Helena: Its raining men!
Policeman: Thats right.
Rachel: Its a different guy!
A Male Customer: Hey, thats weird, todays my birthday too!
{Transcribers Note: There was no credits scene with this episode.}
Monica: Thats much better.
Phoebe: Why?! Whats happening to the coffee house?! (Monica looks at her.) Oh! (Realizes.)
Chandler: Whats up?
Rachel: Oh thats great!
Monica: Okay, Phoebe, y'know what? That-thats it, thats it, all right? No dinosaurs, no ghosts, no giant dogs, okay? Theyre not the right size, theyre not Victorian, and they just dont go.
Monica: Wait! Wait! Wait! You cant start today! Todays the rehearsal dinner!
[Scene: The Hallway, Rachel walks up the stairs and knocks on Joeys door.]
Rachel: So Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.
Joey: All right, it wont go down any further. Its stuck.
Monica: It-its so great to see you both here.
Mrs. Geller: You could kick anyones ass you want too.
Ross: Hey, wheres Chandler?
Joey: Uh, I think hes in Rachels room. See ya. (Exits.)
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, continued from earlier. Ross and Mr. Geller are still deciding what to do.]
Phoebe: Okay. Well theres one down.
Joey: (approaching) Ross, hey, the bands ready outside for your first dance with Emily, so
Ross: Come on thats not fair! I mean you havent even heard me play!
The Assistant Director: (To Joey) Heres your call sheet for tomorrow.
Mrs. Green: I know, my daughters told me about it when they received their impromptu invitations a month ago.
Rachel: (closing the door) Ross said theres still no word from Chandler.
Monica: Wait a minute! Unless, we give her all gifts she can use after shes done being pregnant. Like-like umm, regular coffee, Tequila.
Rachel: So just bring it back downstairs, whats the problem?
Monica: All right thats it, I give up! Whatever you want you can have it! You wanna sing a song? You wanna do a dance? You want your mom stand at the Alter and scream racial slurs? I dont care!
The Director: I dont think so. Lets take it back to Richards last line. (Walks off.) Action!
Ross: This guy could be my babys stepfather!
Ross: Whats wrong with being the Bings?
Rachel: He didnt turn me down! Hes at the game isnt he? I got the date, Im just not on it!
Rachel: Shes actually very sweet and we used to be very close.
Monica: (entering) Whats going on?
Rachel: Lets go to lunch.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are eating Monicas dinner.]
The Director: Lets reset.
Pete: Let me tell you a story. When I set out to create Moss 865, do you think it just happened overnight? No. There was Moss 1, that burnt down my Dads garage, there was Moss 2 that would only schedule appointments in January, and 862 others that I learned from, just like I learned from this fight, never to let a guy stand on my neck.
The Director: Lets take it from there.
Phoebe: Well thats only two days away. What is the other option?
Rachel: Yeah, we got him back. Everythings fine.
{Transcribers Note: Tradition was broken here as there were no commercials immediately after the opening credits, just more show.}
[Scene: Chandlers Hotel Room, Ross is getting Chandler ready.]
Mr. Geller: You cant ask us son, thats cheating.
Mr. Bing: But that was after the wedding, its not bad luck then.
Monica: Soon! I-I just couldnt before. You saw how upset Joey got! I couldnt do that to her, shes my best friend!
Monica: Oh thats sweet. Dont touch me.
Joey: Oh. (Laughs.) No! No wait, thats weird!
Phoebe: Whats going on?
Joey: Thats what you told me.
Ross: What are you kidding? Its Batmans tux!!
Joey: You fell asleep!! There was no kangaroo! They didnt take any of my suggestions! Thats for coming buddy. Ill see you later. (Starts to walk out.)
Chandler: Monicas pregnant.
Chandler: (standing up) Thats right! Im not!
Phoebe (walking to Ross carrying a black leather jacket): Hey, check this out! It’s totally you!
Monica: Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
Monica: Shes right there.
Monica: (entering from her room, excitedly) Im getting married today!!! (She trips and falls.) (Getting up) I think I just cracked a rib. But I dont care because todays my wedding day! My day is finally here!! (Runs back into her room.)
Monica: Whats with all this sand? (picking a handful of sand off of the floor, which is covered in sand)
[Scene: Monica and Rachels bathroom, Joey and Monica are admiring the new floor.]
Joey: Yeah, its (looks up and sees the woman) mine.
{Transcribers Note: There was no trailer for this episode. See you in season 8; which will start this fall.}
(They quickly take their places and Here Comes the Bride Begins to play. Everyone seated looks back. Emily is being escorted up the aisle by her father. She kisses him on the cheek and takes her place by Rosss side.)
Rachel: Everythings ruined. My bed. My clothes. Look at my favorite blue sweater. (Hold it up.)
Rachel: Hey look-look, Phoebes talking to uh, Cute Coffeehouse Guy.
Mr. Kaplan: (entering) Hows that coffee comin, dear?
Phoebe: Well, just buy the damn boat! (Shes still working her way through her tray of booze.)
Rachel: Yeah. Just, if its possible, could you leave him somewhere and go have sex with another guy?
Chandler: Oh you wouldnt uh, care. Its just a stupid comic book story.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Matt: Thats a good one? (They both laugh.)
Ross: and it was Ernst Muhlbrat who first hypothesized that the Velociraptor would expand its collar and emit a high pitched noise to frighten its predator. (A student raises his hand.) Yes Mr. Lewis?
Chandler: Sure. Ummm. Whats up?
Joey: Yeah, thats one naked hooker!
Ross: Rach, hes not an ex-con.