words in movies
Chandler: Well, thats pretty much all Im looking for from these people.
Ross: Yeah Pheebs, come on, you two have completely different styles. Y'know, shes more..(shakes his shoulders, like hes dancing) y'know, and youre more (sees the look from Phoebe and stops)
Phoebe: Okay, see, see, everyone else is happy shes done.
Singer: Okay, my next songs called: Phoebe Buffay, What Can I Say. I Really Loved When We Were Singing Partners, And I Shouldnt Have Left You That Way.
Chandler: (to Ross) All right listen, I have to go to the bathroom, but if the place with the big fish comes up again. Id like know whether thats several big fish or just one big fish.
Chandler: Jeez, man did you fall..(sees its a beautiful woman coming out of the mens room) Hi! So ah, did ya, did-did-did ya fall high?
[Scene: Central Perk, the gangs putting their coats on to leave.]
Phoebe: Wheres Chandler?
(She walks over behind the coat rack, but Joey picks it up and moves it so that hes still behind it, and she cant see him.)
[Scene: Rachels office, Mark is packing his stuff into a box.]
Mark: Actually, its kinda my fault. I-I quit today.
Ross: (to Rachel) But work comes first! (to Mark) Oh hey, but thats sad about you though, what happened? Burn out? Burn all out, did ya?
Rachel: Nooo, hes leaving for a better job.
Ross: Oh well thats great, so I guess this is ah, this is good bye then. Huh? (picks a pad up off Rachels desk and tosses it into his box) Good bye.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Monica are playing with a Ouija board, Phoebes beeper goes off and Monica screams.]
Phoebe: Yeah, that was Leslie calling again to see if we can get back together. Thats the twentieth time today! And good luck Leslie!
Joey: Aww, man. Thats the girl I was hiding from. When she finds out hes my roommate, shes gonna tell him what I did.
Joey: What, oh, oh, oh, no, no, I cant, I cant tell you that, its like the most awful, horrible thing Ive ever done my whole life.
Joey: All right!! Okay, it was like four years ago. Okay, Ginger and I had gone out a few times, and then this one weekend, we went up to her Dads cabin. Just me, her, and her annoying little dog Pepper. Well that night, I cooked this really romantic dinner....
Chandler: Well, thats the best kiss Ive had with anyone Ive ever met in a mens room.
[Scene: Rosss bedroom, Rachel getting into bed while Ross is reading and laughs.]
Ross: Oh, no, no, no, its-its not the lecture ah, I mind, umm....
Rachel: Oh, please tell me its not because Im going with Mark.
Rachel: Because, hes my friend.
Phoebe: Its just y'know, been a couple of hours, and she hasnt called. Not that I even care, y'know.
Phoebe: Thats what I said.
Leslie: (singing) My best shoes, so good to me. I wear them everyday. Down at the heel, holes in the toes. Dont care what people say. My feets best friends, pals to the end. With them Im one hot chicky. Though late one night, not much light, I....
Phoebe: (singing) Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly cat, smelly cat, its not your fault.
Leslie: Wow, thats great.
Phoebe: Thats okay. All right, Im gonna play song thats really, really sad. Its called Magician Box Mix Up. (she turns her guitar upside down to play it.)
[Scene: The lecture, Ross is passed out against Rachels shoulder.]
Monica: Oh, can I borrow this? (points to his milk) My milks gone bad.
Chandler: Great. It was great. Shes ah, shes great, great looking, great personality, shes greatness.
Monica: Sounds like shes got the ah, whole package.
Chandler: Oh God, it freaked me out. Okay, I know it shouldnt have, but it did. I mean I like her, I dont want to stop seeing her, but every so often its like Hey, y'know what, wheres your leg? I mean Im the smallest person in the world arent I? Im the smallest person in the world.
Chandler: (to Monica) Actually hes the smallest person in the world.
Joey: Listen, I ah, I know its a longshot. But, by any chance did she find that funny?
Rachel: Nodded off!! Ross you were snoring. My fathers boat didnt make that much noise when it hit rocks!
Rachel: Well okay, how about four hours in a freezing museum auditorium listening to Professor Pitstains and hes Hey everybody! Remember that thing thats been dead for a gazillion years. Well theres this little bone we didnt know it had!
Ross: First of all its Professor Pittain! And second of all, that little bone, proved that, that particular dinosaur had wings, but didnt fly.
Ross: No-no-no, a bunch of out of control jackets take over an island. (Makes an unusual sound, then he realises that he still has his jacket on and quickly tries to shake it off, thinking its alive and attacking him.)
Ross: No. I... I wanted to be with you. I dont know, I feel like lately, I feel like youre slipping away from me, y'know. With this new job, and all these new people, and youve got this whole other life going on. I-I-I know its dumb, but I hate that Im not a part of it.
Rachel: Its not dumb. But, maybe its okay that youre not a part of it. Y'know what I mean? (Ross looks confused) I mean its like, I-I-I like that youre not involved in that part of my life.
Ross: Thats a little clearer.
Rachel: Honey see, it doesnt mean that I dont love you. Because I do. I love you, I love you so much. But my work its-its for me y'know, Im out there, on my own, and Im doing it and its scary but I love it, because its mine. I, but, I mean is that okay?
Ginger: Its okay if it bothers you. Really. I mean the only thing I need to know is: How much it bothers you? because I dont like wasting my time. Am I wasting my time?
Ginger: Okay. Its just like anything else, you just have to get used to it.
Ginger: Whats that?
Chandler: Thats-thats my nubbin.
Ginger: Whats a nubbin?
Chandler: Its kinda a ah, a third nipple kinda thing.
Ginger: Ah well, its nubbin. Nothing! Umm. Y'know what, Ill see you later. Okay. (She leaves and in the hall we see her shake her shoulders like when someone runs their fingernails across a blackboard.)
Phoebe: Okay y'know what you have to choose. All right, if-if the most important thing on the planet to you is this cat poopy thing then, okay you can have Smelly Cat, but we wont be partners. So whats it gonna be?
Phoebe: Yeah. I actually am, yeah. Y'know life-lifes gonna had you all kinds of stuff, y'know you learn your little lessons and hopefully you grow. Wanna hear a new song?
Phoebe: Okay. (singing) Jingle bitch screwed me over! Go to hell jingle whore! Go to hell Go to hell. Go to hell-hell-hell. Thats all I have so far.
Monica: Wow! Its like Rachel in High School.
Ross: Look, you guys I just wanna say, I really, really appreciate you spending this time with me. Its been a pretty hard time right now, so I just wanna say thanks.
Phoebe: YOU DID NOT!!!! Oh! No! You came up with Relaxi Cab! Thats not good.
Phoebe: Oh no, it is forbidden! No-no, Mrs. Potter fires people for fooling around with clients. And its against my oath as a masseuse.
Chandler: Janice I didnt even know you were pregnant! Whos the unwitting human whos essence youve stolen?
Chandler: No, actually Lauries a boy.
Monica: Umm. Well, theres Rachel, and umm, I think thats it. How bout you?
Rachels Boss: Now Mr. Kaplan Sr. likes his coffee strong, so your gonna use two bags instead of one, see. Now pay attention, cause this parts tricky, see some people use filters just once.
Ross: Yeah, but when the baby comes shes gonna want to move.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, hes still trying to figure out what to make Monica.]
Joey: No-no, its uh, its Heston.
Joey: Wh-whats going on?
Ross: Huh? Oh-oh, it was fine. Uh, it was just a misunderstanding. She didnt want me to go with her. She just wanted to let me know that shes going to Florida for spring vacation.
Rachel: Tommyyyy! Say, whats your favourite thing about summer?
Rachel: Beefsteak Charlies?
Joey: Spocks birth control.
Ross: Oh, it looks like mom and dads house. Oh, it even has a tree with a broken limb out front and the uh, the window in the attic is Oh my God!!
Monica: Whats the matter?
Chandler: Monicas gotta have the phone in the right place and(Frantic babbling.)
The Dry Cleaner: Thats my wife!!! Get out! (Starts yelling at him in Russian, and Im betting hes not saying pleasant things about him.)
Ross: Good! Thats good!
Rachel: No I know, because to be a grandmother you have to be married and have children and I dont have any of those things. Thats why its so funny. (Runs into her room crying.)
Phoebe: No, no, thats the ghost for the attic.
Phoebe: And also, we dont know what to do with this. (She turns on a switch and the girls nipples light up.)
Rachel: Okay, two things didnt happen. Remember I told you that someone made out with Ralph Lauren in the copy room? Well, it turns out thats not true.
Ross: And thats funny, why?
Rachel: Oh but Joey, I have to go. Theres no room for a baby here.
Chandler: Now, theres two reasons.
Joey: Uhhhh. (Hes not sure)
Joey: Check it out, hes winning! (to Monica) Petes winning!
Monica: Okay, lets start with the free messages outside the UN.
Rachel: No, yknow what? Its gonna be okay. I mean you dont have to have this rustic Italian feast. Yknow? And-and you dont need, you dont need this custom-made, empire waisted, duchess, satin gown; you can wear off the rack. (She starts to cry, as does Monica.)
Chandler: Well, I was trying to prove that I was right. Yknow? And it turns out I was wrong. And now its lodged in my throat. (Mimics a cat trying to cough up a hairball.) (He does it again.)
Ross: Okay, its second down. (turns away) Take all the second downs you need.
Monica: (seeing her) Okay, lets go!! Lets hit the road!!
Phoebe: Yeah, its in the guys apartment under the sink. Why?
Frank: So wait, whats the deal here, I can have sex with you, but I cant touch you?
Phoebe: Oh heres a whole bunch.
Estelle: Joey! Its Estelle! I just talked to the casting people; they loved you!
Phoebe: Well okay, its already February and Ive only given two massages and they were both the worst tippers in the world!
Dina: Thanks so much for meetin with me. Joeys told me so much about you!
Chandler: I always thought having a heart attack was natures way of telling you to die! (Phoebe glares at him.) But youre not gonna die. I mean, you are going to die, but youre not gonna die today. I wish I was dead.
Joey: No, its just my luggage.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross has just finished putting Ben to sleep, and is entering from Rachels room.]
Phoebe: Its mostly just photographs of lesbian love scenes interspersed with video games and free sandwiches.
Joey: Chandler. Will you see if your mom can give my resume to Dennis Phillips? Cause if I can get in a Broadway show then I wouldve done it all, film, television, and theater. The only think left would be radio, and thats just for ugly people.
Ross: Hey! Its starting to snow.
Phoebe: Well my guy is spectacular. Okay? Hes a massage client and one time umm, when he was on the table, I looked at it. And I mean all of it.
Joey: All right, Ill take a box of the cream filled Jesuss.
Joey: Uh, Pheebs we kinda need you to drive us all up there in your grandmothers cab, but y'know what, Ill stay.
Rachel: (handing him the letter) Its just some things Ive been thinking about. Some things about us, and before we can even think about the two of us getting back together, I just need to know how you feel about this stuff.
[Cut to the hall, Joeys sister runs up and grabs Chandlers butt.]
[Scene: Chandlers office, Chandler is confronting his boss about the butt smacking thing. His boss is writing on a white board.]
Ross: Maybe its a universal thing?
Monica: Lets get the show on it!
Joey: Its All Relative.
Phoebe: Whats block?
Chandler: Yeah, I know, I-I wish I had too, but yknow I-I think this is a good thing. Y'know? Cause weve had our first fight, and now we can move on. Yknow, I know for me(Notices a pair of mens pants on the chair.) Nicks pants?
Chandler: Im in the bathroom, can you come in here? I think theres something wrong.
[Scene: Phoebes, Frank is melting a plastic spoon.]
Ross: Ive said it! Okay?! But its over Joey!
Joey: Hey, no way, that roosters family!
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are showing everyone the van they bought for the catering business. Its an old Dodge van, that has a cartoon woman riding on a dragon painted on the side of it.]
Friend No. 2: Rachel! Rachel! (stirs Rachel from her dream, shes in her car driving back from the city)
Joey: Uhh, look, your eyes still popping out a little, Im gonna go get some ice.
Paul: Hi! Hi. (Hes looking around.) I think I left my keys here somewhere.
Ross: I dunno, maybe its because youre really sarcastic. Or maybe its cause you uh-
Monica: Maybe. I just hope she realizes how hard its gonna be.
Mrs. Geller: This is your grandmothers engagement ring, I want you to give it to Rachel.
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Written by: Michael Curtis & Gregory S. Malins Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Rachel: Oh! Yay! Look! Theres a piece that doesnt have floor on it!
[Scene: Backstage at Joeys play, Joey is arriving, late.]
Ross: Besides, theres a big age difference.
Phoebe: Oh no, let her stay out there. Its sweet.
Rachel: (shouting) Its All Relative!!
Phoebe: Okay, Monicas are the biggest.
Joey: Well, theres really only one thing you can do.
Chandler: Mom. Thanks for wearing something. (They hug.) (Shes wearing a tight dress with a lot of cleavage showing.)
Monica: Well, the giraffes okay. And so is the pirate.
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are giving Phoebe and Rachel the brides maid test.]
Monica: Oh God Phoebe!! (Phoebe covers one ear.) Oh thats it! Thats it! Right there! Oh! (Tries to cover the other ear.) Ooooh-oooh-ooooh (Covers both ears and continues the massage with her elbows.)
(She throws the paper at him, misses and hits Monicas door, they all jump back at the sound.)
Rachel: All right, lets do it.
Ross: Okay, y'know what, lets just cut to the chase here. Okay? Heidi, which of my boys do you like?
Ross: Monicas right. Were talking about getting married here. Okay? She-she cant just rush into this.
Monica: Oh sure, now you�re Mister Sensitivity. But when you wanted to have sex right after my uncle�s funeral
Chandler: Hey its Joey!
Phoebe: Its a trip for two! (She gets up and takes off her blouse-type thingy shes wearing over her dress.) Excuse me. (She walks over to table four.) Excuse me, is the person who won the Paris trip at this table?
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, a scene is being shot where Dina and Fredrick are celebrating Jessicas horrible accident by drinking champagne.]
(And with that, television history is made as, for the first time ever, an entire show moves its entire production to an entirely different country to make a single episode. We get shots of Buckingham Palace, London Bridge, Big Ben, and the London Marriott as Joey and Chandler exit.)
Rachel: Well then he gets a divorce, its Ross!
Chandler: Oh, dont say that! Dont say that. Thats not true. Is it?
Joey: All right look, Ross, hes right. Emilys great, shes great! But this way too soon, youre only gonna scare her!
Joey: Whats up?
Joey: Whos Elaine?
Joey: What?!! Thats even worse!!
Chandler: Well lets see, there was the guy with the ferrets, thats plural. The spitter. Oh-ho, and yes, the guy that enjoyed my name so much he felt the need to make a little noise every time he said it. Nice to meet you, Chandler Bing Bing! Great apartment Chandler Bing, Bing!
Ross: No, its okay. Some-some kid asked me to pick it up for him, but I dont
Phoebe: Hey!-Hey! Whats going on?
Joey: Nah, Im too depressed to eat. Ill probably eat in like 5 minutes. So I guess Ill just fly home with you guys, what times your flight?