words in movies
Ross: Whats the matter? You okay?
Rachel: Yeah, its just yknow
Chandler: Thats great!
Joey: (seriously) Yes, its a highly controversial procedure.
Ross: Its ridiculous!
Joey: Well, I think its ridiculous that you havent had sex in three and a half months.
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Monica: Shes my favorite character on DOOL.
Rachel: She is so good at throwing drinks in peoples faces, I mean I dont think Ive ever seen her finish a beverage.
Joey: Oh, tell me about it. And shes been on the show forever, its gonna be really hard to fill her shoes.
Joey: Yes, but in Drake Remorays body. (Ross laughs unbelievably.) Why is this so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist!
(She holds the phone out and starts taunting Phoebe. Phoebe calming knocks the phone out of Rachels hand and catches it.)
Dina: Im going to keep dating him Mother, and theres nothing you can do about it!
Jessica Lockhart: (crying) Oh, my baby! (Hugs Dina, but moves Dinas head to her other shoulder so that shes the only one in the picture.)
Cecilia: Youre not the fan whos dying are you?
Cecilia: Im supposed to meet and hug a fan whose dying, but thats not supposed to be until (to no one in particular) later!
Rachel: No Phoebe! You cannot get the phone that way; thats not fair! Okay look, I have an idea. Why dont we, why dont we see what kind of number he has on his speed dial, and then from that we can tell who has more in common with him. And then whoever does gets the phone.
Rachel: Yes okay. (Checking the speed dial again.) Well now see this isnt telling us anything. (Reading the speed dial) Joe. Carlos. Peter. Ooh! Peter Luger! T hats a steak house!
Phoebe: Okay, a meat eater. Fine, thats one for you.
Rachel: (looking at the speed dial) Oh, I win! Hes got Barneys on his speed dial.
Phoebe: So you dont know thats Barneys the store! That can be yknow his friends house, or a bar. Who has Barneys the store on their speed dial?
Chandler: I think its the dying cat parade.
Monica: It sounds like its coming from across the street.
[Cut to Rosss apartment, he his playing the Bagpipes, badly. Hes worse than that whole keyboard thing a few years ago.]
Monica: He cannot play at our wedding! I mean everyone will leave! I mean come on, that is just noise! Its not even a song!
Rachel: Umm Pheebs, remember when we were in the coffee house we decided that I was going to keep the uh, the cute guys cell phone?
Rachel: Umm, okay. But while you dial, let me show you the features of my new ringing handbag. (Rachel dials her phone and Phoebes bag starts to ring.) Oh, it does work! (Rachel grabs the phone and takes it out of Phoebes handbag.)
Rachel: Oh is it?! (She answers the cute guys phone.) Uhh, hello? (On her phone) Yes hi, is Rachel there? (On the other phone) Yes she is, just one moment please. (To Phoebe, holding out both phones.) Its for me!
(The cute guys phone rings.)
Rachel: Oh my God! I bet thats him. My digital fairy tale is about to begin. I wonder how I should be? Should I be uh (In a sexy voice) Hello? Or should I be (Happily) Hi! Its Rach (Phoebe knocks the phone out of Rachels hand, catches it, and answers it.) Would you stop doing that?!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Shhh! Im on a call! (On phone) Umm well yeah, you can pick it up tonight, say 8:30? At-at my apartment. Its umm, its umm 5 Morton Street, Apartment 14, umm and then maybe yknow after we can grab a bite to eat or whatever. (Listens) Okay, well okay Ill see you then. (Listens) Bye. (Hangs up.)
Phoebe: What?! Thats the first time today!
Cecilia: (walking up) Youre absolutely right they are writing me out of the show. They dont know exactly when its going to happen, but apparently going to be very soon and thats it.
Cecilia: Oh youre right. Thank you! Whats your name again?
Joey: Oh thats great! Oh thank you so much!
Joey: Hey! Now, Ive been watching some tapes, hows this? (In a British accent.) "Jessica Lockhart will never step foot in this place again! Ever!!"
Joey: (shocked) I can do an English accent?! That babys going on my resume!
Monica: Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
Chandler: Well its just my entire family was run out of Scotland by Vikings. Anyway, lots of bad memories. (Makes a few unintelligible noises.)
Chandler: Thats not really important right now. What is important is; while we appreciate the gesture, we just dont feel bagpipes are appropriate for our wedding.
Ross: Come on thats not fair! I mean you havent even heard me play!
Ross: No, youve heard my practice. Okay? Just-just give me a chance to perform for you and then decide whatever you want. And Im not going to tell you what song Im gonna play either. But uh, lets just say when its over Ill bet there will be a we bit o celebration.
Cecilia: No, he already knows that he owns everything in the room! Hes not finding it out for the first time! So, try it again.
Cecilia: Right. Hes not angry at the room either. Try it again, he owns it! He owns the room. It is his. He owns, owns, owns, owns the room! He owns it!! (Joey gets a snooty look on his face.) All right, its a little weird, but its getting better. (Joey is pleased.) Oh well, Im gonna miss this woman so much. I dont know what Im going to do! I mean, its been 20 years of my life.
Joey: Hey thats not true! Look at uh, look at Angela LansbAngelina Jolie!
Cecilia: Well, lets just say if I left 15 years ago, the landscape of Mexican cinema would be very different today!
Cecilia: But Well now, nows a different time for me. (Starts to cry.)
Joey: Oh hey come on, dont-dont-dont do this! Umm, look let-let me tell you something, okay? Now when I watch you do a scene, Im thinking, "Boy, she-she is a great actress!" (Shes not buying it.) Uh but-but, I am also thinking, "She is hot!"
Cecilia: Oh yeah-yeah, we should get the (Pause) So when Jessica kisses a man, she usually puts umm, both her hands on the mans face. (She does so.)
Joey: Yeah-yeah, I noticed that! Is that cause shes so passionate?
Cecilia: No! Its because that way the camera only sees her! (She takes her hands off his face.) Do you wanna try it?
Guy: Hi! Its Tom, Im here to pick up the phone.
Phoebe: Because its my apartment!
Tom: No thats my assistant.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Cecilia is entering the living room from Joeys room followed by Joey.]
Cecilia: Well, its nice to know that you
Rachel: (screaming) MONICA!!!! MONICA!!!! (Runs to Monicas.)
Cecilia: Oh that explains all the womens underwear.
Monica: (entering with Rachel) Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are so amazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
Joey: They sent me todays script! They never send the script!
Joey: Yeah well, Im guessing after this shes not going to be crazy about electricity either.
(Ross resumes playing, this time accompanied by Phoebe screeching out Es in tune with Ross. While Phoebe is singing along, Rachel is having a very difficult time keeping a straight face. Thankfully, Ross gives up after a little while.)
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, a scene is being shot where Dina and Fredrick are celebrating Jessicas horrible accident by drinking champagne.]
Dina: Loosening the saddle on mothers horse was brilliant Fredrick. And the electric fence, inspired.
Dina: I cant believe shes really gone. Look around you, all of this is ours. (They move into kiss but; theyre stopped by Joey entering with a huge bandage wrapped around his head.)
Jessica Lockhart: Whats the matter Dina? Dont you recognize your own (Does a hair flip) mother?!
Cecilia: No thats La Guardia. (Joey nods in recognition.) This is Mexico.
Joey: Thats a really long time.
(They kiss and both put their hands on the others face like Jessica would do.)
(Why was this the trailer? Well, thats because it was an introduction into the special out takes episode that immediately followed the show. The entire out takes episode, Friends: The Stuff Youve Never Seen can be read by following this link.)
Phoebe: Oh yknow whats sadder than this? Bambi. I cried for three days with that movie. No wait two! Because on the third day my mother killed herself so I was partly crying for that.
Joey: I dont know! But its the same!
Ross: Yeah Pheebs, come on, you two have completely different styles. Y'know, shes more..(shakes his shoulders, like hes dancing) y'know, and youre more (sees the look from Phoebe and stops)
Frank: No, your a masseuse, its cool, Im not a cop.
Ross: Wheres my ring? My dead grandmothers wedding ring? Where is it? Where is it?
Ross: (on phone) No-no-no, thats great! Ill be there Monday. And thank you again! (Listens) Okay. (Hangs up) (To All) Umm, that was the head of the Paleontology department at N uh, Y, uh U!
Ross: and thats the story of the dreidle. Now, some people trace the Christmas tree back to the Egyptians, who used to bring green palm branches into their huts on the shortest day of the year, symbolising lifes triumph over death. And that was like 4000 years ago.
Ross: Mona? (Theres no answer, so he starts to leave but remembers where her extra key is. He reaches atop a hall light just outside her door and grabs the key. He looks at in triumph as the pain from it being hot moves along his nervous system to his brain, and when it arrives his brain orders his hand to drop the hot key and his mouth to squeal in pain. After dropping the key he pulls his shirtsleeve over his hand and uses the key to open the door and enter Monas apartment.) Okay, if I were a salmon shirt, where would I be? (He hears a key in the door and as it opens he dives behind the couch.)
(As hes talking Monica notices someone familiar has just entered the restaurant. Lets see; I seem to remember him driving a Ferrari in Hawaii solving crimes as a private investigator and as a certain eye doctor in more recent times.)
Ross: Every week, the TV Guide comes to Chandler and Joeys apartment. What name appears on the address label?
Joey: And whats cool is, the character is from Naples, right?
Joey: (surprised its Lauren) (hugs her) (whispering) Wheres Kate?
Joey: Hey, I tell you what. Lets you and me go out and have some fun. Huh? Whatever you want. Come on!
Chloe: What? Are you married? Cause thats okay.
[Scene: The Gellers kitchen, Phoebe is bringing in some dirty dishes.]
Phoebe: Uh huh! If its a girl, Phoebe, and if its a boy, Phoebo!
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She runs after him, but sets of the security system, which locks the stores door and brings down a set of bars behind her, caging her in.) No! What?! Help me! Let me out! Now! (Points the musket at them.)
[Scene: A Theatre, Chandler and Ross are there to watch the premiere of Kathys play.]
Carol: This is impossible. Its just impossible.
Chandler: Wait a minute, its perfect. We got a lot of time to kill and were in a building thats full of beds!
Phoebe: Mrs. Waltham. Hi. Its Phoebe again.
Phoebe: Umm, Im trying to move that pencil. (Theres a pencil lying on the table.)
Cliff: No, Im sorry. Its just my foot itches like crazy.
Ross: What? Oh! I gotta tell you, I-I wasnt expecting to like her at all, I mean I actually wasnt expecting to like anyone right now, but shes really terrific.
Phoebe: Yknow the only reason hes marrying you is because he thinks all the things you were saying about yourself were true.
Ross: Thats right, I love you! And-and Im gonna play with you all the time.
Ross: Rach, I-I cant tell you how-how much that means to me! Ohh Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You-you hated the name Ruth! Why-why would you change your mind? Unless, you know were never going to have to use it. You did see the folder. You know its a boy!
Rachel: Well, it would be easier to move just right across the hall. Wait a minute, unless youre thinking about Naked Wednesdays.
Rachel: Thank you. (They hug.) Oh Joey and look at this crib! Its so cute!
Ross: Well, I mean its not all bad. Im learning to appreciate the uh, smaller things in life. Like the sound of a bird and the color of the sky.
Ross: Wha? No no! Ah! (Ross scarfs all of his trifle down in about a second. He looks like hes going to throw up.) (Lying) All gone! So good! Maybe Chandler has some left.
(Ross and Rachel look into each others eyes and kiss.)
Rachel: Chandler, theres a guy right over there. (Points to the counter)
Phoebe: Yeah. Its just, you know, its this whole stupid Ursula thing, its...
Monica: Yeah, theres one right under the cabinet.
Phoebe: No! No, we have an emergency. Okay? Rachels coming to London.
Chandler: Whats the second part of your plan?
Ross: Of course! It all adds up! I mean you youre obsessed with her. Its always, "Ross, what are you gonna do about Rachel?" "Ross, why-why are you moving in with Rachel?" "When are you gonna confess your secret marriage to Rachel?" You want her!
Joey: No-no-no, I think Im gonna see how things go with Kathy. Shes pretty cool.
Joey: I cant! Yknow? You guys dont know what its like to put yourself out there like that and just get shot down.
Chandler: Thats it?! I gave up my Disneyland story for that?
Monica: Theyre kissing lets just go around them.
Monica: Because hell know what to do? (Rachel comes out of her room with a bear thats dressed in a rain suit.) Oh my God, youre a genius!
Rachel: Yeah, sure. Umm, they didnt have poppy seed bagels, so I (Enters Joannas office and sees her handcuffed to her chair wearing nothing but a slip) Oh my word!
Kathy: No, but thats bad!
Earl: Its just that I uh, have been working for ten years now at this meaningless, dead-end job and nobody here even knows I exist!
Mrs. Geller: (lying) Ive gotta call my friend Mary and tell her how good this is, from Monicas room.
Chandler: Actually, its Miss Chinandolor Bong.
Vince: Yo!! (slides down that pole that fire stations have)
Monica: Okay, the owner of Allesandros came over to yell at me, but instead I made him some sauce, and he offered me the job as head chef!!
(Monicas entrance makes Phoebe try to hide the ring by putting it in her mouth.)
Phoebe: All right y'know what, nevermind! Everyone wants to have a green one! Im sorry, Im sorry, I didnt mean to get so emotional, I guess its just the holidays, its hard.
Chandler: Good morning everyone, it�s nice to see our team together for the first time. Now, before we get started, are there any questions? (colleague raises hand) Yes, Ken is it?
Rachel: Oh, I forgot this was in here. Umm, this was the uh garter that I was saving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monicas something borrowed and its blue. (Starts to cry again.) Yeah
Rachel: Cos I was gonna say theres no way you couldve done the end the way you guys did it back then!
Rachel: Okay, whos next?! (She looks around the room, and stops when she comes to Ross.)
Monica: I really like to say that Im-um (Pause) Yknow what Id really like to say? Im drunk!! (Mrs. Geller pulls the camera down.) Thats right mom and dad your little Harmonica is hammered!! (Ross grabs the camera out of his dads hands.) And guess what! Ive been drunk before! And Ive smoked a cigarette! And I got a box of Ding-Dongs hidden in my underwear drawer! Its all okay. Its okay because I turned thirty today. And, and I can do anything I want! Because I am a grown up. (Falls over sideways with Ross filming the fall.)
Chandler: Oh yeah, thats very nice. Plus, yknow they were free and theyre too small.
[Scene: Chandlers, Chandler is interviewing a potential roommate.]
Rachel: So. Ross, Ive bugged him about this a million times, hes not gonna change.
Joshua: You really dont seem like you do. Thats
Phoebe: Good thats a good one. Okay, Monica, anything? Yknow? Does Rachel move the phone pen?
Eric: Hi, its Eric. From the Halloween party, Ursulas fianc�e.
Phoebe: If you wouldve let me finish, it goes on to say that hes probably not gay.
Phoebe: God, what a mess. (She grabs the bowl and heads for Monicas.)
Frank: (hiding under a pile of clothes) Hi. (She jumps up screaming.) Wait, no! Just put the mail down. Its-its me!
Joey: No, its okay, but if Im Marge, my breasts are coming out my back.
Rachel: Come on Ross give me the keys! Monica does not know what shes talking about! I am an excellent driver!
Elizabeth: Oh, dont worry I have plenty of sun block, its SPF-30.
Monica: Im fine-d. Im fine-d! Yknow, its a really hard word to say.
(A commercial for the Mattress King, Janices ex-husband, comes on TV.)
Rachel: I would love to live with you Ross; thats-thats great! Thank you!
Phoebe: Well, if you really, really want it, then its okay.
Chandler: Oh, this is horrible, its just horrible.
Ross: Filming Rachel is not something I planned. Okay look, heres what happened, and Joey you-you can back me up on this. All right, about-about a month and a half ago I came to you with a problem? Umm, a personal thing.
[He closes the door and walks over to get something from the fridge. He starts to smell something and turns around to see Phoebes dollhouse smoking. He runs over and takes off the roof to reveal that the dollhouse fire.]
Phoebe: Well, its just that maternity clothes are so expensive.
Chandler: Hey, I didnt make up the rules. Now, after you receive the doubling bonus, you get uh, one card. Now that one card could be worth $100 bringing your total to 1,500. (Joey gets excited.) Dont get to excited because thats not gonna happen unless you getNo way! (He takes the top card, which is the two of clubs. Of course, any card wouldve won. Chandler pays him.)
Monica: So you can like, bite, and pull peoples hair and stuff?
[Scene: Rosss bedroom, he has fallen asleep waiting for Emily to call. He is awaken by the phone.]
Sarah: Could you do me one favor, if its not too much trouble?
Monica: Yeah, its just something I picked up.
Chandler: (to Rachel) And you Ross, I believe, if you check Rachels bag you will find a half-eaten box of cookies in there.
Rachel: Hi, Im sorry Im late but I am ready, ready to talk you up! When does Lizs father get here?
Story by: Adam Chase Teleplay by: Michael Curtis & Gregory S. Malins Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
The Director: Okay, all right. Lets do it. (He walks off.) And Action!
Cookie: No kiddin, thats the exact same drink I made myself right after I shot my husband.
Chandler: All right! Fine! But its just a lunch date, no more than an hour! And from now on I get my own dates, I dont want you setting me up with anybody ever again!
Monica: Thanks. (Joeys still patting the burn spot) I think you got it!
Chandler: Look you dont understand, Gandolf is amazing. Yknow youre never know whats gonna end up happening, you go out for a couple of beers and end up on a fishing boat to Nova Scotia!
Rachel: What?! You mean theyre not coming to a social event where theres no men and theres no booze?! Thats shocking! I dont care, as long as my moms here.
Teacher: Alrighty. Were gonna start with some basic third stage breathing exercises, so Mummies, why dont you get on your back? And... coaches, you should be supporting Mummys head.
Ross: Okay. Okay. I mean Ill be okay. Its just I dont think I handled it very well.
Phoebe: Umm Wow, all right. (Checks the book.) Wow! Yay! Ooh, Im gonna meet a guy! And really soon! And hes gonna be the man of my dreams. Probably not the guy I had a dream about last night. (Points at Chandler.)
[Scene: Central Perk, the gangs putting their coats on to leave.]
Monica: Y'know what, thats fine, maybe you havent grown up, but I have.
Richard: Wow. Y'know were back where we were. Honey, I would love to do all that, but nothings changed.
[Scene: Chandlers office, he is just finishing up a meeting with his boss and the rest of his team.]
Phoebe: Okay. Okay! Well okay, who do we know thats coming? Me. Are you?
Chandler: Its Clint! Clint!