words in movies
Chandler: Treegers snaking the shower drain.
Mr. Treeger: (coming in from the bathroom) Whoa, hey, that ladys all kinds of naked.
Rachel: Honey, what are you doing? Thats too heavy.
Ross: Well I, thats the thing, I dont know! I mean, whenever I brought it up with her she said, (In a British accent.) "This is so fantastic! Why do we have to talk about the future? Lets just enjoy "
Monica: Ohhh, I knew you loved her! Then you need to go to the airport and tell her. Youre probably just gonna catch her just as shes about to go to the gate. Youre gonna call out her name and say, "I love you!" And shes gonna say, "I love you, too!" And you guys are going to have the most amazing kiss, everyone at the gate will applaud.
[Scene: Beth Israel Medical Center, Phoebe is at her OB-GYN doing an ultrasound, Rachel is with her. We here the babys heartbeat.]
The Doctor: Thats it.
Phoebe: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!! So I-I mean so in a few months Im going to have three full grown babies just walkin around inside me?! Oh! Oh! And its gonna be one of those log rides where they just come shooting out!
Alice: Hi! (She runs over and hugs Phoebes stomach.) So, how did it go at the doctors?
Phoebe: Oh well, okay, hey, yknow how when youre umm, youre walking down the street and you see three people in a row, and you say, "Oh, thats nice?"
Phoebe: No, no maybe cause its harder to raise them, and the added expense, and
Alice: No-no-no, no, its going to be fine. Because umm, because I teach Home Ec, and uh, I can have 30 kids making baby clothes all year long. Yknow itll-itll be like my very own little sweatshop.
Frank: No, its okay. Were-were gonna have three kids! And thats-thats a different kind of dream. Three kids and no money.
Ross: Thats, thats, thats a big candy bar. (Shes holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.
Emily: Oh. (Shes shocked and hugs him.) Thank you. (She boards the plane.)
Ross: Thats no problem.
Rachel: Whats that song? It has been in my head all day long.
Chandler: Its the theme from Good Will Humping.
Chandler: All right look, forget it, forget it. You told her you love her, its over.
Ross: Okay! Okay! But if she doesnt call, it is definitely over! No, wait. Wait. Unless, eventually, I call her, yknow just to she whats going on, and, and she says shell call me back, but then she doesnt. Then its over.
Chandler: Whats the second part of your plan?
[Scene: Rosss bedroom, he has fallen asleep waiting for Emily to call. He is awaken by the phone.]
Ross: No, no, that-that, thats all right. Umm, Im just glad you called.
Emily: Ross umm, theres something that Ive got to tell you, theres-theres someone else.
Monica: This isnt how its supposed to go, there cant be another guy.
Monica: Of course theres another guy!! This is even more perfect! Now you have to prove your love!
Joey: Oh yeah, sure, that makes sense. Yeah. Cause you already told her you love her and she didnt say it back, then she called you and told you that theres another guy, so yeah, go to London thatll scare her!
Phoebe: Ooh-Ooh! I did it! I did it! I figured out a way to make money! Im gonna open up my own massage place and Franks gonna help me! And! We can work it around his schedule so he doesnt have to quit school!
Monica: Thats sounds great, but how are you going to afford it?
Phoebe: No! Think about it, its a taxi that people take when they need to relax, its
Phoebe: YOU DID NOT!!!! Oh! No! You came up with Relaxi Cab! Thats not good.
Ross: No, because she hasnt come home yet. And she hasnt been home all night! Shes obviously staying with that other guy, and Im the stupid moron who spent the whole night outside her apartment!
Phoebe: Hey, tell him about Relaxi-Taxi, and-and ask him if he thinks thats better than Relaxi Cab.
Rachel: Okay, its not Relaxi Cab. Its Relaxicab, like taxicab.
[Cut to London, we sit Ross sitting outside Emilys apartment. We hear Emilys phone ring with amazing clarity. Apparently, sound travels quite easily through the walls of British buildings. Anyhoo, Ross looks around for the ringing phone and in the meantime Emilys answering machine picks up and once again with amazing clarity we hear Emily say ]
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Emily: I wish I could know if youd heard any of that. I suppose Ive either just told you I love you or given my neighbours a good laugh. Mrs. Newman if youre listening, bugger off this in none of your business. I suppose theres not much chance you did heard that, and theres the call waiting so, I should go. Oh well. (Answers the call waiting.) Hello.
Joey: Thats kinda nice.
Chandler: Yeah, thats kinda a relief.
Phoebe: Okay, well Ill bring them by tomorrow morning. Okay, and uh, by the way, theyre not actually puppies, theyre Frank and Alices triplets. Okay, see ya! (Exits.)
Phoebe: Yeah thats right Chandler does still think Im pregnant. He hasnt asked me how Im feeling or offered to carry my bags. Boy, I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him. (Monica looks at her.) After you of course.
Ross: Thats too bad.
Rachel: (all excited) Op, op, car! Car!! (sees its Ross) Ugh!!!
Rachel: All right! Ross, do you think its easy for me to see you with somebody else?
Phoebe: Whoa!! Thatokay, thats a lot of pressure on me and my uterus. (to Dr. Zane) So, well okay, so is thereis maybe is there something that I can do yknow just to like help make sure I get pregnant?
Monica: And Ross, if it werent for Rachels rumor I mean no one in high school would even know who you were. She put you on the map!
Chandler: Oh its Bing, sir. Im sorry , I was just ah...
Ross: All right, lets not jump to any conclusions. All right? There was some sexual chemistry between them.
Chandler: Well, Phoebe I thought Id(Off Phoebes look)Yeah, what the hell. (Exits with Phoebe.)
Phoebe: And! Yknow what Jake says? That womens underwear is actually more comfortable. And he loves the way the silk feels against his skin.
Monica: (to Phoebe) So whats Phoebe like?
Ross: No! Come on letsOne more time! One final push! Ready? 1 2 3! (Rachel pushes so hard her head snaps up head-butting Ross and knocking him down.)
Elizabeth: Yeah, Ive been coming here since I was a kid. This used to be my Grandmas.
Chandler: (joining them) Hey! Which ones my turkey burger?
[Scene: Joeys sisters house, theyre finishing up dinner.]
Chandler: My favorite part was when Superman flew all the Jews out of Egypt. (Glaring at Joey whos nodding.)
Richards Date: Oh, thats real pretty. Wait a minute, dont I get to see the bedroom?
[Scene: Monicas childhood bedroom (which has been turned into a gym), Monica is lying on the treadmill as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: All right. Honey, thats-thats a sleeve. Okay?
Ross: Yeah well, if ah, if thats the rule this weekend... (She gets up) No!
Monica: Hes totally flirting with you too.
(They both try to slowly extricate themselves from Ross, but theres a knock on the door that awakens him.)
Phoebe: And that�s Judy over there at the bar with Emma?
Joey: Whats the matter, Pheebs?
Phoebe: What the hell is this?! What, did you actually thought it would make me feel better to give me stuff that I cant use for another two months?! This sucks! All right, whats my next present?!
[Scene: A Theatre, Joey is arriving to rehearse the play hes in.]
Robin: Well y'know, hes got access.
Joey: Home sweet home, huh? Nice to, uh, get back to reality. Plus we know how the New Years gonna go off. I guess theres no reason for all that Y2K panic, yknow? Anyway, gnight!
Kate: Yeah, thats pretty much what I had in mind.
Phoebe: I-I wanted to apologise if Iyknow seemed a tad edgy yesterday at my shower. Yknow its just the hormones, yknow.
Ross: Well, hes finally alseep. About that ah, bump on his head?
Ross: Shes going in. Wait! Hes going in! Hes going in!! The doors closed! I, I cant see anything but the door closed!!
Doug: No-no, I heard what you said, funny. I like funny. (Chandler starts to leave) This team is about hard work, but its also about having fun. Good to have you aboard Bing! (smacks him on the butt, and Chandler leaves shocked.)
Dr. Long: (To Joey) Uh, if you have any questions, heres some information on Braxton-Hicks. (Hands Joey a pamphlet.) Oh and by the way, you did the right thing by bringing her in. Youre gonna make a wonderful father.
Ross: Chandlers gone again!
(At that Phoebes eyes open in shock.)
Billy: Its me, Ive been sleeping with your wife.
Monica: Thats that weird voice again.
Rachel: Oh mom, I swear Im not an idiot. Ive read all kinds of books on pregnancy and giving birth, but I-I just didnt think to read the part about what to do when the baby comes. And-and then guess what? The babys coming and I dont know what to do. Oh, can I throw up in my diaper genie?
Joey: Yeah. No-no I-I know I might not win, but its just Ive never even been nominated before! I want it so much.
Ginger: Okay. Its just like anything else, you just have to get used to it.
Phoebe: Whatever, its the perfect end to the perfect weekend anyways.
Rachel: I mean Im probably 98% happy, maybe 2% jealous. And I mean whats 2%? Thats nothing.
Chandler: See? (Does his laugh.) Here we go. (Starts walking her to their room, and has to pass in front of Mr. Geller whos sitting at the table and Mrs. Geller whos standing next to him.)
Ross: Its over.
Monica: Its very interesting, Phoebe.
Phoebe: Yeah, its about relationships. Yknow? The traps, the pitfalls, what not to do, keep going. This stuff is great!
Mark: Actually, its kinda my fault. I-I quit today.
Joanna: Bing! Thats a great name.
Joey: Uh, yeah but uh, (In Drakes voice) I may have said those things before but, I never truly meant them. Until now.
Joey: Thata girl! Huh? We should get out of here; theres a new class comin in.
The Interviewer: So, lets talk about women. Im sure our female readers will be interested to know about your romantic life.
Ross: (angrily) Whos your roommate?
Rachel: Thats right Joey, the chair angel came in and heeled your chair. (She sits down in the chair.)
Ross: Remember the Russian satellite, Sputnik? (They all look at him.) Well, Im a potato or a spud. And these are my antennae. (Points to the colander with an old TV antenna glued on top that hes wearing.) So Sputnik, becomes (Theyre still confused) Spud-nik. Spudnik!
Carol: No. But its okay, Ill just put out pickles or something.
Monica: Its hard for some people!
Ross: Thats correct. Ladies?
Rachel: Wow! I mean, I justI cant, I cant believe this. Yknow, I mean you think you know someone even, even Phoebe whos always been somewhat of a question mark.
Eric: No-no its not! I dont want to lose you! Its-its like I was saying to Ursula when I was making love to her and I thought she was youYeah it is too weird.
Chandler: But I do know that its some time tomorrow.
Chandler: (to Joey) Well hes probably mad after you called him this morning to borrow his goggles.
Billy: So its-its not heeled yet?
Phoebe: Ugh! No! This is so hard! I went through this whole book (Holds up a book) and found nothing! I want a name thats really like, yknow strong and confident, yknow? Like-like Exxon.
Ross: Whos Chip?
Phoebe: Alright, well, maybe now its not okay.
Monica: Its like two miles!
Brenda: I think I know whats going on here.
Joey: What? Whats wrong?
Helena: (to Chandlers back) Oh look, a standing ovation already! So early in the show. Oh turn around honey; let me see your pretty face. (He slowly turns around. Helena recognizes him.)
Ross: Well, as much as Id like to meet Josh and warn him, Emily and I arent going to be here. All right? I mean, shes going to come by first to say good-bye, and then Ive got a whole special evening planned. So Im sorry, no party.
[cut to Chandler and Joeys apartment, Tommy is using the phone]
All: Thats great! Hey! Excellent!
Joey: She made me switch to light Mayo. Thats it! Thats all I got! And, you know what? It tastes the same and my pants fit better!
Rachel: Its a trifle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch. [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] Then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef saut�ed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
Phoebe: (to Monica, whos entering) Hey, youre early.
Chandler: Hey, look, this name has been holding me back my entire life. Okay, its probably why kids picked on me in school, and why I never do well with women So, as of 4 oclock tomorrow, Im either gonna be Mark Johnson or John Markson.
[Scene: Cousin Frannies Wedding Reception, Monica and Ross are entering and finding their table.]
Monica: Oh, but its made her so happy.
Joey: (pause) Hows that going?
[Scene: The beach house, its still raining. Chandler is building a sand castle, Rachel is doing Monicas nails, and theyre all drinking margaritas, obviously bored.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Phoebe are preparing for Rachels baby shower.]
(They kiss and both put their hands on the others face like Jessica would do.)
Voice: What is the name of your roommate who is very, very sorry and would do anything (Joey realizes its Chandler and hangs up the phone in anger.)
Joey: No, no, no, no! Hes fine! Look, look, look! (picks up the ball) Heres your ball! Get your ball! Get your ball! (he throws the ball and it bounces right next to the dog) Get your ball! My God, what have I done to you, huh? I broke the dog! Pheebs, I broke the dog!
Gunther: Its all right. Sweetheart.
Rachel: Chandler gets it! Its Chandler Bing!
[cut to inside Central Perk, we see Ross quietly tapping on the window, desperately trying to get the gangs attention, while Tommy is still screaming at him]
Mr. Douglas: I see. I guess you never really know whats goin on inside a persons head.
Ross: Thats right good things, that-that is what I said. (glances at Monica)
Joey: Sure, its hard to forget! But that doesnt mean you have to talk about it! A lot of things happened on that trip that we should never, (to Chandler) ever talk about.
Rachel: Ohh! Thats so great!
Chandler: So Rachels all moved out huh? How are you taking it?
Joey: Look its not that bad. So what, it blocks a little of your door, a little of my door.
Monica: I missed this apartment! Now, this is a grown-ups apartment! Yknow, I-I should be with a grown-up, do you know what I mean?!
Chandler: Hey, you know what you can do? I remember reading about this director, I think it was Orson Wells, who at the beginning of the movie would hire somebody, just so he could fire them in front of everybody. Then they would all know, whos boss.
Ross: Oh yknow, I stillI cant believe it. Joey and Rachel I mean its Its like you and me going out, only weirder!
Chandler: Okay, now lets decide who has the nicest ass.
Joey: Just because she went to Yale drama, she thinks shes like the greatest actress since, since, sliced bread!