words in movies
Melissa: You have been M.I.A for the past seven sorority newsletters, whats up with you?!
Rachel: Wh(Turns and looks at the gang whos staring)Why dont I tell you over here? (She walks Melissa away from the gang.)
Melissa: So last I heard you were gonna get married. (Grabs Rachels hand and notices that she doesnt have a ring on it.) (Sadly) Oh poor Ray-ray.
Rachel: Oh no-no, no! Its good! Its all good! I-I actually work at Ralph Lauren!
Rachel: I will not! Im the divisional head of mens sportswear!
Melissa: I-Ive got to go. This has been so great Ray-ray! (Gunther returns with her cigarettes.) Oh, there you are. (Takes them from Gunther.) (To Rachel) Umm, so listen, just call me. Heres my card. (Hands the card over.)
Melissa: Oh no, thats-thats an old card. Umm, I wanted to get out of that and-and do something where I can really help people and-and make a difference.
Joey: Hey guys! Look whos back! Its Ray-ray!
Rachel: Shes actually very sweet and we used to be very close.
Monica: Wait a minute, she isnt Shes not the one who you
Rachel: Its not a big deal!
Ross: So thats two of my wives.
Monica: (telling Chandler the seating arrangement) Okay so this is where the band is. (Points.) And this is where the bar is. (Points) And all these pins have peoples names on them. (She has pins to show the seating at each of the tables.) And Rach, here you are. (Points to Rachels place.)
Monica: Chandler, relax its not a contest. (To Rachel) Certainly not a close one.
Monica: Okay, I think thats it. The seating chart is done. This is our wedding. They all look like theyre having fun dont they?
Monica: Oh! (Gets up) Lets see, well if this is the wedding hall then umm (Walks away) youre parents will be at home in Queens.
Joey: What theyre not invited?! Oh no, thats terrible! Theyre gonna be crushed!
Joey: Well, Im sorry. I thought parents were coming! Yknow? Your parents are comin! Chandlers parents are comin! Rosss parents are comin!
Monica: Rosss parents are my parents!
Rachel: (motioning to a rack) So now, these are all the tuxedos that we make and if theres anything that you like, we can make you a deal. Anything at all. (Grabs a few) But these are the three that Monica pre-approved.
Rachel: Im Monicas maid of honor. Okay? Dont try to blue pin me!
Chandler: (sees another rack) Well, whats the deal with these? These-these look nice.
Rachel: Umm, well lets see uh, this one is Tom Brokaw.
Chandler: Whos that?
Chandler: 007?! This is James Bonds tux?!
Chandler: Oh, I have to get married in James Bonds tux!
Rachel: Its a pretty cool tux.
Chandler: Oh, its not just that, I would be Englands most powerful weapon. Jet setting heartbreaker on her majestys secret service. A man who fears no one; with a license to kill. (Worried.) Would Monica let me wear this?
Phoebe: I like our way. Oh! (Grabs a piece and jumps a bunch of Joeys like in Checkers.) Chess!
Phoebe: What is this? Whats going on?
Rachel: Well, do you want to hear what actually happened or Joeys lewd version?
Phoebe: Joeys!
Ross: No. Rachel hooked me up with a tux! But not just any tux, Batmans tux!
Ross: Thats right! Made expressly for Val Kilmer and worn by him in the hit film that Batman film he was in.
Chandler: You cant wear that! Im wearing the famous tux! James Bonds tux!
Chandler: Look, its my wedding day okay? If you were getting married I would never do anything to upset you.
Monica: Oh thats too bad. Its true, but too bad.
Joey: Come on! Look just-just telllet her know that you really want them to be there. Lets not forget, this is a woman that has sent you many lasagnas over the years.
Rachel: Oh. Oh, thats great!
Joey: Right. Right. The wedding, gotcha. But I mean, its gonna start a little late right? I mean, weddings start late. Right?
Joey: Ah. Yeah. Well look, the thing is its the same day as my nieces christening and I really want my parents to be there in time to see me. Cause my parts just in the beginning Im not even in the rest of the showWedding!
Phoebe: Oh, somewhere Joeys head is exploding.
Phoebe: Rachel, its okay. You dont have to do this. I believe you. All right? Okay, if-if you say that you kissed Melissa, then you kissed Melissa.
Ross: What are you kidding? Its Batmans tux!!
Chandler: (trying on the jacket) Okay. Holy double-vented comfort Batman! (Finds something in the pocket) Whats this?
Monica: All right thats it, I give up! Whatever you want you can have it! You wanna sing a song? You wanna do a dance? You want your mom stand at the Alter and scream racial slurs? I dont care!
(Shes about to get in when )
Melissa: Aww, look whos being suddenly shy. You cant tell me you dont feel what I feel. Nobody can kiss that good and not mean it. (Goes in again.)
Rachel: Well yknow what they say, the 23rd times the charm. (Chandler enters.) Aww, look at you all handsome!
Monica: (to Ben) Whos so brave, youre so brave, yes you are, youre so brave.
Monica: Yeah, well hes my brother! And plus he drives so slow he could never hurt it.
Phoebe: You! An actor?! Thats madness!
Phoebe: That’s nice. I like having things to read in the bathroom.
Rachel: Yeah thats right you werent thinking! Yknow what? Let me give you something to think about! (She pulls up her sleeves and steps towards him.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys, everyone is there, helping to lift the entertainment center into place]
Rachel: Me? Im great! Im fine! Im sooo good!! But, you know whos not great?! Men! Youre a man right Ross?!
Monica: Well, yknow its none of my business, but arent you married?
Ross: (rushing back in) What?! I wh-, whats wrong?
Ross: Well I dont know umm, (Pause) what if we were too tie each other up? (Carols shocked and obviously doesnt like that idea.) Umm, some people eat stuff off one another. (Carol doesnt like that idea either.) Nah! Umm, yknow we-we could try dirty talk? (Carol still says no.) Umm, we could, we could have a threesome.
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
[Scene: Rosss apartment, Rachel is entering as Ross comes out of the kitchen carrying popcorn.]
Joey: Hey, finished my recommendation. (he hands it over to Chandler) Here. And I think you’ll be very, very happy. It’s the longest I ever spent on a computer without looking at porn.
The Interviewer: (returning) Oh wait! I almost forgot. We have to ask everybody this. Other than Days of Our Lives, whats your favorite soap opera?
Joey: Hey, imagine if I never got fired off Days Of Our Lives! (Closes his eyes to do so.) Oh-hey, theres Carol again!
Elizabeth: Oh, because I was thinking, the semesters over; youre not my teacher anymore.
Joey: Alright, alright, hey yknow fair is fair, (he pretends to wash his hands) if youre right, youre right, what can I say, but hey oh no! (He throws water on the guys pants)
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment, its Monicas bridal shower and Phoebe is passing out some finger food.]
Ross: And; people thinking its huge has led Monica to believe that we are stealing her thunder. (To Monica) Which we are not!
[Scene: Joeys in the front entrance watching for Rachel. The bridesmaid he met at the rehearsal dinner come in.)
[Scene: Phoebe Sr. house, she is a real estate agent and is trying to sell a house over the phone. By the way, its still raining outside.]
[Cut to London, Chandlers hotel room. He is getting ready for bed by doing push-ups. One push-up. Just as he gets under the covers, theres a knock on the door.]
Rachel: Oh, okay. Uhh, well lets see. (Grabs his hand.) Youre aboutwell uh, this one is large. And this one(Grabs the other hand.)
Rachel: Oh-oh! Okay, shes kicking!
Joey: (walks up) Uh, shes with me. (Introduces himself) Dr. Drake Remoray.
Ross: So, I got us some reservations for Sunday night, okay? How about, Ernies at 9 oclock?
Ross: So thats the only reason she could be here huh? It couldnt have anything to do with the fact that-that maybe Im a good listener and I uh I put on a great slide show!
Chandler: This is unbelievable. Its been like a half an hour. If this was a cartoon, youd be looking like a ham right about now.
Chandler: I wasnt sure which one Mary-Angela was. (all of Joeys sisters gasp) Look, Im sorry okay, I was really drunk, and you all look really similar.
Phoebe: Yes! I do! All the time! I love them! Oh my God! I did it! Its me! Its me! I burned down the house! I burned down the house!
Joey: Eyes! No, no. Your eyes! No. Chandlers eyes!
Mr. Treeger:: Im sure as hell a dancer, its no use Marge will never go for me.
Monica: Remember that guy that gave me a bad review? Well (Feeds him a spoonful of what shes cooking.) Im getting my revenge!
Guy: Im sorry, its just that youre so incredibly beautiful.
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys, there is lumber all over the apartment]
Chandler: Hes not gonna make it, hes stuck in Chicago.
[Scene: Elevator at the Ralph Lauren offices, Kims waiting for it. The door opens and Rachel is inside.]
Ross: (takes a drink) Damn, this coffees cold! Hey Rach, do you mind if I heat this up on your loins? (Joey and he both laugh.)
Phoebe: Oh, theres no such thing as an innocent burger.
Phoebe: No, the No Smoking sign. Theres no smoking in my Grandmothers cab.
Mona: Hey its Mona! From the wedding.
[Scene: Rachels office, shes looking at a picture of Tag when he knocks and enters.]
Chandler: (starts crying) I-I cant believe Jills gone. (They all look at him.) I cant help it, I opened a gate.
Rachel: Oh, what is wrong with me lately? I mean its like every guy I seeI mean look here. (Points behind them) Look at that guy for example, I mean normally thats not someone I would-would be attracted to, but right now, with the way Im feeling, all I want to do is rip off his sweatpants and fanny pack.
Frank: I know a guy whos the 18th.
Agency guy: So, how’s everything going in here?
Ross: (looking at the page) 717? (to Carol) Wheres 717? (He gets up to return the page, Carol starts to take the last of the food into the kitchen, but Ross grabs the last piece.) Hey, youve have more of these for Susan right?
Ross: What, that we had a baby? Come on lets give him a little credit, although, he did eat a piece of plastic fruit earlier.
Chandler: Kathys with her parents, I have nothing to do, so tomorrow we are partying with Gandolf dude!
Mindy: Look, I know he's not perfect, but the truth is, at the end of the day, I still really wanna be Mrs. Dr. Barry Farber, D.D.S.
Joey: (coming out of the bathroom) Whats twisted?
Rachel: Shes steaming her dress, why? Whats up?
Ross: Look, Chandler, its my joke. But, hey, if it makes you feel any better they dont print the name, so it doesnt really matter who gets credit, right?
Chandler: I know. (He rubs Rosss head)
Chandler: (on phone) Oh thats great! Good for you.
Janine: Sure, New Years Eve is only two weeks away. Can you wait?
Joey: Thats right I stepped up! Shes my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, Id pee on anyone of you!
Joey: I don’t know. She’s got to be taking it hard, I was like her only client. Except for this guy who eats paper. And I’m guessing he eats more money than he makes. Look, I know she’s not a great agent, but she did stick with me for ten years. I’m gonna call her and hire her again.
Mr. Geller: Ive been thinking about getting rid of it. I was driving it the other day and saw my reflection in a store window. Your mothers right, I do look like an ass.
Ross: ....right? Right? I mean its pretty unbelievable y'know, I mean they just took off, took off without even looking back. Y'know I dont, I dont need them, huh, Ive got you guys now as friends, you and Susan.
Monica: You broke a little girls leg?!!
Phoebe: Its mostly just dumb sister stuff, you know, I mean, like, everyone always thought of her as the pretty one, you know... Oh, oh, she was the first one to start walking, even though I did it... later that same day. But, to my parents, by then it was like "yeah, right, well what else is new?"
Phoebe: Oh Joey, weve heard the specials three times! Okay? Theres prime rib, mahi mahi, and a very special lobster ravioli. (She grabs his menu and hands it to the waiter.)
Phoebe: Hes just such a great guy Im so excited about him.
Elizabeth: Ross, its going to be okay. Im not going down there to hook up with a bunch of guys. I really like you. I like how things are going between us.
Joey: Hey, its gonna be all right.
Joey: Weekend at Bernies.
[Scene: In Phoebes Grandmothers cab, driving up to the cabin. Phoebes driving, Rachels sitting shotgun, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are in the back seat.]
Joey: That’s it? You know, it seems all you do lately is drop the ball.
Phoebe: I wanna see whats in your hand. I wanna see the trash.
Monica: Im sick of the signs! Its too fast, Im happy the way things are!
Monica: Nooo! (Giggles) Okay. (She tries to pull herself up by Rachel and Joeys doorknob, but the door opens and she almost falls into the their apartment. She manages to catch herself.) Whoa! (Stands up, unsteadily) Okay. See I was, I was a little nervous about turning (whispering) thirty. (Giggles.) So the bus boys took me out for some drinks. (Pause) I wanna puke on you later!
[Scene: Allesandros, continued from earlier. The other waiters are gone and Monica is confronting Joey about his not speaking up.]
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
Ross: And I too am just a love machine. (Hums a little bit and mimics Pauls flexing.)
Chandler: Look out kids, hes coming! (Ross continues to leave with his head down in shame.)
Ross: No, I mean its okay, I mean, theyre-theyre my friends. In fact, I-I-I was married to one of them.
Rachel: Thats great! Wow man, so Joey mustve really taught you some stuff huh?
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Mr. Geller: I just wish Nana were alive to hear Rosss toast.
Ross: Yeah, y'know the ah, the girlfriend I told you about last night? (Hes frantically throwing the cushions off of the couch looking for her other shoe) Well it turns out she ah, she wants to get back together with me. Oh, I found it!!
Ross: Uhh, believe me when hes older, hell understand.
Emily: Yeah, but it-it-its my whole lifeyou come to England.
Dr. Green: (interrupting him) I know!! Its a museum! What, youre the only one around here who can make a joke! At least mine was funny. Ah, waiter, we will have two lobsters and a menu. (nods at Ross, and mouths I dont know to the waiter.)
Rachel: Okay, hold on just a second. (She grabs a camera out of the desk and takes his picture.) Im sorry, its for human resources, everybody has to do it. Could you just stand up please?
[Cut to Ross getting of an elevator carrying a bouquet of flowers and walking down the hall to Rachels room.]
Phoebe: Im telling you hes dead. What we are about to have here is a dead fat guy on a stick.
(Joey starts to return the fumble and Chandler grabs Joeys shirt and rips it off of his back.)
Rachel: Its not kicking right now. Although we would love to see you do (Mimics him) that again.
Rachel: Ross, shes not weird, she just wants her stuff to be one of a kind.
Female Clerk: Hes not here right now.
Chandler: Okay, cause thats not gonna get annoying.
Alice: Sweety, now, shes a woman, not a gumball machine.
Joey: The Silly Putty! Its not so silly anymore!
Trudie Styler: Hi! (By the way, its actually her.)
Ross: But thats not enough. So So heres a key to my apartment. (Hands her his key.)
Phoebe: Joey, shes so cool. She speaks four languages.
Joey: Thats not gonna work out! Then shes gonna come home all weepy and youll be tellin her, "Oh thats okay. Youll find someone." And then, bamn! She finds you!
Jennifer: Katie. Geez! See Katie, come hereKatie! (Katie spills some popcorn.) Katie, come here Katie. (She obeys and sits where shes supposed to.) Very good.
Hums While He Pees: I know its really lame, but I got these tickets from my boss andOh no! No! No! My God!